Chapter 8: She Writes Our Name In The Stars
Having given it some thought as she was falling asleep the night before, Shepard decided it was best to finish scanning the Artemis Tau cluster to see if there were any other signs of geth activity. There might be other prothean ruins in the area that Saren was scouting out. She didn't want to leave any stone unturned, even if they were trying to beat Saren to the Conduit. Hell, maybe they would find something that Saren missed and it would give them the edge they needed. Don't be stupid. There's nothing important here. Go talk to Liara again, convince her to join with you so she can see the images the beacon left. Make her keep looking until she realizes it's Ilos that we need to get to and then let's go. Nothing else matters.
At the galaxy map, Shepard punched in the coordinates for the Athens system. She stood staring at the map for a while without really seeing it before turning away and heading down to the mess hall. She put on a pot of coffee and leaned against the counter as she waited for it to brew. Once there was enough for her to steal a cup, she did and carried it over to a table. Sitting down she wrapped her hands around the warm cup and inhaled the rich scent as the steam warmed her face.
A few minutes later, Kaidan stood over her with his own cup of liquid caffeine. He motioned towards the bench across from Shepard and she nodded. Kaidan sat down and stared at his own cup for a while in silence.
"That was pretty close. On Therum, I mean," Kaidan said breaking the silence.
"It was," Shepard blew lightly over her coffee before taking a sip. "The turian councilor is pissed off that the ruins got destroyed. As if I did it on purpose."
"Well, it is a shame that we lost the ruins but I'm just happy that we got everyone out of there alive," Kaidan said looking towards the med bay. "So, what do you make of Dr. T'soni?"
"I think she's incredibly smart. A bit full of herself, but still young. For an asari, anyway. She's… innocent. Naïve. Definitely not a soldier. I actually feel a little bad for pulling her into all of this, especially considering who we're going up against. I don't think she's involved with Saren and Benezia's plans, but we're asking the woman to help us against her mother… maybe even kill her mother if things go south. It's going to shatter her, but we need her help," Shepard said.
"I can't imagine being put in her position. Do you think she's up for the task?" Kaidan asked.
"I honestly don't know, Kaidan. That's why I'm taking things a little slow, buying her what time I can to fully come to terms with what it is we're asking of her. We're going to finish clearing out this cluster before moving forward. I need to know if there are any more geth in this area. I think I'll take her with me the next time we go out, so I can watch her and see how she handles herself," Shepard said taking another sip from her cup.
"That sounds like a good idea, Commander. If you want, if you think we should, I can start working with her. Helping her to improve her combat skills," Kaidan offered.
"Let's wait and see how this next run goes, but that might be necessary. Thank you, Kaidan," Shepard said.
Kaidan smiled, "Of course, Commander. Anytime. You need anything; that's what I'm here for."
Shepard returned the smile but it didn't reach her eyes. She had so much on her plate right now; she was finding it hard to decide where to begin. She watched Kaidan over the top of her cup for a moment. He seemed to be contemplating something.
"Something you want to say, Alenko?" Shepard finally asked.
"Off the record, I think there's something wrong here," Kaidan began. "This Saren is looking for records on some kind of galactic extinction. But we can't get backup from the Council? Sorry, Commander. There's writing on the walls here, but someone isn't reading it."
"The Council doesn't want to believe anything's wrong. I'd call it human nature, but...," Shepard trailed off with a half shrug.
"I hear ya. I – It just seems like a group that's been around as long as the Council should see this coming. It's funny. We finally get out here, and the final frontier was already settled. And the residents don't even seem impressed by the view. Or the dangers," Kaidan said studying his coffee intently.
"Well, well, you're a romantic. Did you sign on for 'the dream', Alenko? Secure man's future in space?" Shepard asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Yeah, I read a lot of those books when I was a kid. Where the hero goes to space to prove himself worthy of a woman he loves. Or, you know. For justice. Maybe I was a romantic in the beginning. But I thought about it after Brain Camp – ah, sorry, 'Biotic Acclimation and Temperance training.' I'm not looking for 'the dream.' I just want to do some good. See what's out here. Sorry if I got too informal. Protocol wasn't a big focus back in BAaT," Kaidan said.
"Tell me about it," Shepard said.
Shepard liked to know her crew; she was expecting these men and women to have her back in a fight. She wanted to know that she could trust them, and to trust them, she needed to know what made them tick. A service record only told her so much. It only told her what they had done, but not who they were. Most in her position demanded formalities at all times – liked to stay emotionally distant from those that they worked with. Not Shepard. Shepard went out of her way to foster friendships with her crew. It was the rest of the world that she kept at a distance.
"'Biotic Acclimation and Temperance' didn't last past the airlock. To the kids they hauled in, it was 'Brain Camp.' Sorry, 'hauled in' is unkind. We were 'encouraged to commit to an evaluation of our abilities, so an understanding of biotics could be compiled.' There are worse results of 'accidental' exposure to element zero in the womb. Beats the brain tumors some kids grew up with," Kaidan said.
"Is there some question about how you were exposed?" Shepard asked catching the way Kaidan emphasized 'accidental'.
"My mother was downwind of a transport crash. It was before there were human biotics. A little after the discovery of the Martian ruins. It only gets iffy around '63 when Conatix was running out of first-gen subjects. Until then, they'd relied on accidentals. Bunch of guys in suits show up at your door after school. Next thing you know, you're out on Jump Zero," Kaidan said.
"You know of any intentional exposures for certain?" Shepard didn't like the sound of that.
"No one 'knows.' Doesn't mean they didn't happen. As big as the exposures were, it was hard to track down accidentals. It was different then. No one knew the potential, so there wasn't a lot of regulation. Anything Conatix did was gold. I'm not saying they intentionally detonated drives over our outposts. But in retrospect, they were damn quick on the scene," Kaidan said.
They were both quiet for a moment, drinking their coffee as Shepard mulled that over.
"'Jump Zero' is the Gagarin Station, right? What's it like?" Shepard asked.
"Yeah, that's the official name. Biggest and farthest facility we had for decades. Right on the termination shock, the outer edge of the solar system. It's where they did all the 'goose chase' FTL research. Before we caught on to using mass effect fields. It was a sterile research platform when I was there," Kaidan said.
"There were other kids in the same boat, right? At least you weren't alone out there," Shepard said.
"That's true. We did have a little circle that'd get together every night before lights-out. We didn't have much to do, though. It was a research platform then, and Conatix kept Jump Zero off the extranet. To prevent leaks," Kaidan said.
"Then you must've had plenty of time to get to know each other," Shepard said.
"Yeah. We'd sit around and bull every night after dinner. Play cards or network games. There was this girl named Rahna who had a little circle grow up around her. She was from Turkey. Her family was very rich. But she was smart, and charming as hell. Beautiful, but not stuck up about it. Like you, I guess. Ma'am," Kaidan said.
Shepard's eyebrow twitched but she didn't acknowledge the insinuation. She thought that if she stayed neutral, Kaidan would come to realize that she wasn't interested in going down that road with him. Hell, she wasn't interested in going down that road with anyone. Not right now, not while she had images of protheans being ripped apart every time she closed her eyes. Not while she thought she might be cracking.
"Sounds like she was special to you," Shepard said focusing him back on the girl, Rahna.
"She was. Maybe she felt the same, but… Things never fell together. Training. You know," Kaidan said.
"Jump Zero's a long way from home. What was it like?" Shepard asked.
"The grand gateway to humanity looks a lot better in the vids. Anyway. This was supposed to be a casual debrief, not a bull session about stuff that happened years ago," Kaidan said.
"We have to depend on each other in combat. I like knowing what kind of man I have at my back," Shepard said with a shrug.
"I understand, ma'am. I won't let you down," Kaidan said. "You make a habit of getting this personal with everyone?"
"Of course. But I don't enjoy it with everyone. We'll talk again later," Shepard said.
"I'll, uh – I'll need some time to process that, Commander," Kaidan said. "But yeah, I'd like that."
Shepard paused with her cup halfway to her mouth. She winced inwardly as she realized what her words must have sounded like to the lieutenant. She wasn't sure if she should say anything or not, she didn't want to be too presumptive and she didn't want to be a bitch, either. There were enough men and women out there who thought she was a bitch, she didn't really need it from her crew. Shepard let Kaidan walk away, thinking that she would find a way to address the matter later; take some time to think about exactly what to say first. It doesn't really matter, he'll hate you just the same later no matter what. If he lives through Virmire, anyway.
Shepard drained her cup before taking it back over to the sink to rinse out. Her mind wandered back to the moment on the Citadel when it felt like she had lost control of herself. She searched the memory, combing over it, trying to remember the feeling exactly. What had she been thinking when it happened? Had that ever happened before? Shepard turned the water off and put her mug down on the foam mat next to the sink. She gripped the lip of the sink and leaned forward, putting her weight on her palms. There was a time, something kind of similar happened on Mindoir. After watching her parents die. It was almost like she was watching things happen for a time then, and not really there. But that felt more like watching a movie or something, she thought. This was different.
"I'm not going crazy," Shepard said defiantly to herself.
She heard a quiet cough behind her and spun around, smacking her elbow on the counter as she did. She cursed and grabbed her elbow as she looked up to see Garrus standing a few feet behind her. Amusement danced in his eyes.
"Sorry, Shepard. I forget sometimes that human hearing isn't as, ah, sensitive as turians. I thought you knew I was here. I didn't want to risk you trying to break my wrist again so I thought it was safer if I just waited for you to uh, finish staring at the sink," Garrus said.
Liar. And a smartass.
Shepard felt the heat rise in her face so she tried to hide it by looking down at her elbow, rubbing the tender bone.
"Sensitive hearing, huh?" Shepard asked.
"Hmm. Good eyes, too," Garrus said tapping a talon against the plating next to his eye.
The movement caught Shepard's attention and her eyes followed his hand up to his face.
It's always strange, seeing him again for the first few times without the scars. We grow accustomed to his scars; stop noticing them after a while. It's like you get so used to seeing a man with a beard and then suddenly one day he shaves and he just doesn't even look like the same person anymore.
Shepard squinted, "You didn't really think I knew you were there, did you?"
The turian fluttered his mandibles, "No. But you knew that I knew you were there when you stopped to watch me."
It wasn't a question. Shepard felt the heat increase in her face. She crossed her arms and met Garrus' gaze once more.
"You're on my ship. I like to know what the people on my ship are doing," Shepard said.
She saw the glow of his visor shift slightly, and his eyes narrowed perceptibly.
"Is that so? Shepard, your face is doing that red thing that human's faces do when you're sick, angry... or embarrassed. I forget what you humans call it," Garrus said.
Shepard dropped her arms to her side and looked indignant, "It's called blushing, and I am not."
Garrus tapped the plating next to his eye again in response.
"Okay, well, it's not polite to point it out, Garrus," Shepard said conceding the point.
"I'll try to remember that, Shepard. So tell me, are you sick?" Garrus asked.
"No," Shepard said flatly.
"Are you angry? Because I have to say, I wasn't a part of the First Contact War but it is still a bit unnerving to have a human soldier staring at your back without explanation…," Garrus said.
Shepard sighed and shook her head, "And there I was thinking I lucked out of managing to piss everyone on the ship off. No, Garrus, I'm not angry and I have no problem with turians or any other species. Well, okay, maybe I still have some issues with the batarians but that was different. That wasn't war; that was slavers breaking into my home when I was a teenager and killing everyone I knew and loved. But even still, I realize that it wasn't the fault of every batarian that I meet."
Shepard's hand went to her mouth, "I – I don't know why I just said all of that. I'm sorry."
Because you already trust him, utterly and completely. Because I trust him, utterly and completely.
Something flashed in Garrus' eyes, and his mandibles pulled in close to his face. Anger. Disgust. When he spoke again, his voice had taken on a deeper timbre.
"I've had more than a few run-ins with slavers while working with C-Sec. Shepard, I'm sorry," Garrus said.
"No, it's okay. Really. It was a long time ago and I've dealt with it," Shepard shrugged. "As good as anyone ever can, I suppose."
Garrus stood perfectly still watching Shepard as she ran a hand over her face and then used it to rake through her hair. When she looked back at him, the amusement had returned to his eyes. He leaned forward slightly and stage whispered.
"That leaves embarrassment, Shepard," Garrus said.
"Oh for the love of – Alright, Vakarian. I was embarrassed. I was embarrassed in the cargo bay because I realized you knew I was standing there watching you like an idiot. I was embarrassed just now because you startled me and I realized you probably heard me standing here talking to myself. Happy?" Shepard said throwing her hands up in surrender.
Garrus chuckled, his mandibles flaring, "Almost. Why were you really watching me, if not to plot my death? And I highly doubt that my work on the Mako is that interesting to anyone but me."
Shepard leaned back against the sink and Garrus leaned in against the counter studying her.
"Maybe I was plotting your death, you were messing with my ride," She said with a smirk.
"Hmmm," Garrus pointed to his visor, "I know I make this visor look good, but it isn't just for show. I've got it programmed to monitor heartbeats. It helps with targeting, but it's especially useful in the interrogation room. See, with this visor, I've gotten pretty good at telling when someone is feeding me – what is it you humans say, bullshit?"
Shepard pushed herself off of the sink and closed the distance to the counter Garrus was leaning on. Mimicking his stance, she leaned against the counter opposite of him and smiled.
"Well, maybe that's just the best answer you're going to get, Vakarian. You really shouldn't have told me that, though," Shepard said.
"Why's that?" Garrus asked inhaling slowly and deeply through his nose.
He's scenting you. Interesting. I've never noticed that before. Not this early. Then again, you never stood staring at him like an idiot before either.
"I'm N7, Garrus. It just means that I have to remember to use my training to keep my heart rate steady when I want to lie to you," Shepard said with a smirk.
He'll just figure out how to make his visor detect the subtle changes in pupil dilation later.
"No? Really? You can do that?" Garrus asked.
"Try me," Shepard said.
"Hmm. Alright," Garrus said watching her closely. "What were you drinking in that cup?"
"Rum. Yeah, sometimes the job stresses me out and I have to knock back a few shots to relax. Ashley was just up here, she and I were having a drink together. Talking about our plans to take over the galaxy now that I'm a Spectre and all," Shepard said.
Garrus squinted and the circular part on his visor contracted. Shepard smirked when she heard him let out a low growl before he fidgeted with the visor.
"I can smell the coffee and I know you were talking with Kaidan. Alright, maybe that one was too simple. Why do you think you're going crazy?" Garrus asked.
Shepard leaned in a little closer, "Because I've been having erotic dreams about Wrex."
Garrus barked a laugh, "Alright. Damn it, Shepard, you're good."
"Good? Only good? C'mon Vakarian, I'm the best," Shepard said with a wink as she pushed back from the counter.
"We'll have to see about that, this isn't over Shepard. I'll catch you slipping," Garrus said.
"So what'd you come in here for anyway? I'm not keeping you from eating am I?" Shepard asked.
"Nah, I was on my way back down to the cargo bay and heard you talking with Kaidan. Thought I'd say hello," Garrus said.
Shepard's eyes narrowed playfully, "Garrus… were you eavesdropping?"
"I, uh, well…," Garrus scratched a gloved talon lightly over the face of the counter picking at something that wasn't there, "I just didn't want to interrupt. It seemed like the two of you were having a priva – well I've only been on the ship for a few days but I've been around enough humans on the Citadel to tell when…"
"Spit it out, Vakarian," Shepard said.
Garrus looked up at Shepard, "Well, it is obvious Kaidan has a thing for you. I didn't want to get in his way if he was going to finally make a move. The guy doesn't seem very smooth, Shepard."
Shepard let her head fall back and laughed up at the ceiling, "No, no he does not. He's a good guy, though. Maybe a little too good. For me at least. I think I said the wrong thing; gave him the wrong impression. I'm going to have to figure out a nice way to let him down," Shepard snapped her head up to look at Garrus, "How do you do that?"
"Do what?" Garrus asked.
"Get me to tell you things I had no intention of telling anyone?" Shepard asked.
Garrus made a humming sound, his mandibles fluttering slightly as he watched her, "It wasn't a skill that I knew I had, but I'll keep that in mind."
Shepard raised an eyebrow, "So wait, if you were there long enough to hear our conversation, what took you so long to say hello after he left?"
"Oh, well, that one's easy," Garrus said folding his arms and standing with one leg out to the side. "I waited until your back was turned so I could sneak up on you. Wanted to see the great Commander Shepard jump."
Shepard's mouth dropped open, "Uh! You ass! I hurt my elbow!"
"Oh I know, that was the best part," Garrus said smugly as he turned at walked away.
Shepard grabbed a spoon off the counter and threw it at his retreating form, but he took a step to the side and the spoon clattered ineffectively to the floor. Garrus chuckled as he disappeared from sight. Shepard picked the spoon up and tossed it into the sink. Her eyes caught sight of Liara talking to Dr. Chakwas through the med bay window. Shepard decided she should check up on the asari before heading back to the CIC.
She entered the med bay to find Dr. Chakwas alone, "Where'd Liara go?"
"Oh, I've set her up in the office at the back. I don't really use it and I thought she would like having her own private workspace. I hope you don't mind?" Dr. Chakwas said.
"Oh, no, that's fine. How's she doing, doc?" Shepard asked.
"Liara's fine. A bit shaken up after having the geth attack her, but she'll be fine," Dr. Chakwas said.
"Thanks, Dr. Chakwas," Shepard said heading towards the office in the back of the med bay.
She opened the door to find Liara sitting at a desk working quietly and wondered if asari hearing was as good as turians. Either way, she didn't want to startle the asari so she scuffed her feet along the floor a little more than usual as she walked up behind her. Liara turned to look over her shoulder before standing up to face Shepard.
"Commander, are you coming to check up on me?" Liara asked.
"You look much better. How are you feeling?" Shepard asked indirectly avoiding answering Liara's question.
"Dr. Chakwas assures me I am going to be fine. I was impressed with her knowledge of asari physiology," Liara said.
"You're in good hands. Dr. Chakwas knows what she's doing," Shepard said.
"I never properly thanked you for saving me from the geth, Commander. If you hadn't shown up…," Liara said.
"I'm just glad we got there in time," Shepard said.
"So am I," said Liara. "I know you took a chance bringing me aboard this ship. I have seen the way your crew looks at me. They do not trust me. But I am not like Benezia. I will do whatever I can to help you stop Saren. I promise."
"Don't worry, Liara. I trust you. I know you won't let me down," Shepard said.
Shepard could tell that this woman needed all the encouragement and reassurances she could get. This whole thing must be terrible for her, Shepard thought. Shepard had lost her mother when she was still a kid, but she couldn't honestly say what she would do if she found herself in Liara's shoes. Shepard didn't believe that she would help her mother do something as heinous as what Benezia is doing, but she wasn't completely convinced that she would be able to fight her own mother. Point a gun at her mother and pull the trigger. That might be what Shepard is asking Liara to do. Sometimes she is there with us, when we face Benezia. She has had to help you kill her mother, hundreds of times at least even if she doesn't know it. Or maybe she does know it. Maybe they're all going through this, too. Maybe there is another Liara that's just like me fighting to be heard inside of Liara's head right now. Another Garrus, another Wrex, another Kaidan, and another Ashley. Maybe wherever Jack, Miranda, Thane, Mordin… all of them are right now, maybe they're all going through it, too. Maybe I'm not alone. I'm so tired of being alone. So tired.
Liara smiled, "It means a lot to hear you say that, Commander. Thank you."
"Do you know why Benezia joined up with Saren?" Shepard asked knowing it was a tough, but necessary question.
"I don't understand it. She was always outspoken about the need for the asari to become more involved in shaping galactic events. Maybe she thought allying herself with Saren would somehow before the greater good in the long run. At least, I hope so," Liara said sounding troubled by her mother's actions.
"This hurts you, doesn't it?" Shepard asked.
"None of this makes any sense to me. I have not spoken to Benezia in many years, but I know her! And this was not like her. Something changed," Liara insisted.
"I'd like to know more about the asari," Shepard said trying to give the distraught asari something else to think about.
"We were the first species to discover the Citadel. We were instrumental in forming the Council. And we always strive to be the voice of peaceful cooperation in galactic disputes," Liara said. "My people believe we are all a part of a single galactic community. Each species contributes something to the greater whole. Although we seek to understand other species, it seems few of them seek to understand us. The galaxy is filled with rumors and misinformation about my people."
"Like what?" Shepard asked.
"Most of the inaccuracies are centered around our mating rituals. My species is mono-gendered. 'Male' and 'female' have no real meaning for us. We still require a partner to reproduce. This second parent, however, may be of any species and any gender," Liara explained.
"I don't understand. Your species can mate with anyone?" Shepard asked.
"Mating is not quite the proper term," Liara said shaking her head. "Not as you understand it. Physical contact may or may not be involved, but it is not an essential element of the union. The true connection is mental. Our physiology allows us to meld with other beings. We can touch the very depths of their minds. We explore the genetic memory of their species. We share the most basic elements of their individual and racial identities. We then pass these traits on to our daughters. It is how we learn to grow as a species, and how we develop a greater understanding of other races."
She likes to get physical, though. There's this spot right behind her crest that if you touch, she just melts like chocolate in your mouth. She loves you, you know, well maybe not quite yet but she will. Whether or not you choose to be with her. She always loves us. Loves us enough to comb through space to find our body and take it to our enemies because they are the ones who can bring us back to life. She writes our name in the stars.
"What happens to your partner after the union?" Shepard asked genuinely curious.
"Every relationship is different. Some unions are a single encounter, with both parents parting ways afterwards. Others can be more long-term. Sometimes an asari and her partner will stay together for many decades," Liara said.
"Do you know who Matriarch Benezia chose as her partner?" Shepard asked.
Matriarch Aethyta. You'll meet her on Illium, and then later again on the Citadel after the reapers hit hard. Her father was a krogan, and she's hilarious to talk to.
"She rarely spoke of her partner, though I know my father – if you want to use that term – was another asari," Liara said.
"Benezia never told you her partner's name?" Shepard asked.
"Unions with our own kind is no longer common. Not for the purposes of reproduction. Most asari believe it weakens our species. Asari daughters inherit racial traits from the father species. If both parents are asari, then nothing has been gained. Or so conventional wisdom would hold. I am what is sometimes called a 'pureblood', though no asari would ever be cruel enough to say the word to my face. It is a great insult among my people. It is possible Benezia's partner was embarrassed by their union. She may have been too ashamed to publicly acknowledge me as her offspring," Liara explained.
Shepard thought Liara sounded a little ashamed as she talked about her heritage. It made her angry, that her people would make her feel that way. It sounded stupid and illogical to Shepard. Evolution would dictate that their species would continue to change over time whether or not they bred with other species. All of their offspring were still asari; it just didn't make sense to her.
"Maybe she wanted to meet you but couldn't. Something could have happened to her. Maybe she passed away," Shepard said.
"You might be right. I hope you are. But I have no way to know for sure. Benezia never spoke of her partner. Whatever happened, it caused her too much pain to dwell on it. She raised me by herself, though that is not uncommon. Many asari raise their children alone, particularly if the father species is short-lived. Often, the partner will pass on long before the child reaches maturity," Liara said.
"You asari live for a thousand years. What happens when your partner dies?" Shepard asked.
"Few sapient species live as long as my kind. We have learned to take a philosophical approach to our unions. We do not focus on the inevitable loss of our partners. Instead, we enjoy the time we spend with them. And even after they are gone, a part of them lives on in us. The union is a connection that transcends both time and space," Liara said.
Shepard smiled at that, she thought it was a lovely idea, "I should go."
"Goodbye, Commander," Liara said.
Shepard left the med bay and made her way back up to the CIC. They had arrived in the Athens system and Shepard was studying the galaxy map.
"Message coming in. Patching it through," Joker's voice came in over the comm.
"Commander Shepard, my name is Nassana Dantius. I have a job for you. I can't say any more in an unsecured communication. If you're interested in hearing my offer, meet me on the Citadel so we can talk in person. I'll be waiting in the diplomat's lounge on the Presidium," the transmission played.
"Set course for the Citadel, ma'am?" Joker asked over the comm.
"No, Joker. We'll clear this cluster and then head to the Citadel, as planned. I don't know who this Dantius is but I'm not going to come running from the other side of the galaxy just because she thinks I'm a merc for hire," Shepard said.
"Aye, aye, Commander," Joker said.
After several hours spent scanning planets in the Athens system and finding nothing of importance. Shepard returned to the galaxy map and typed in the coordinates for the Macedon system. She left the map and went down to the mess hall to grab a late dinner. She tried to remember, but she didn't think she'd eaten lunch. Her stomach was none too pleased with her. She was surprised to find Wrex in the kitchen; she hadn't seen him outside of the cargo bay since he came aboard.
"Shepard," he said by way of greeting.
"Wrex," Shepard responded in kind.
"You're out of ryncol," the krogan said as he turned and walked away with a tray stacked high with several packets of rations and what was likely the only fresh meat on the ship.
"I'll uh, pick some up when I can…" She said as he left the room.
She thought she heard him grunt in reply. Shepard chuckled to herself. That one was going to be a challenge. She found some fresh vegetables in the stasis chamber of the refrigerator and made herself a salad. As an afterthought she grabbed a beer, she didn't know whose they were but she'd replace it when they got to the Citadel. She took her food to her cabin and ate while she pored over the documents she had saved on her search for information about the krogans.
As intrigued as she was to learn about krogan physiology and the krogan's redundant systems, Shepard began having trouble keeping her eyes open about an hour in. She took her empty plate and beer bottle back out to the mess hall. She saw that most of the sleeper pods were already occupied. It was nice to be able to lie down and stretch out instead of having to sleep in the pods, she thought. Shepard returned to her room and stripped down to her underwear before crawling in to her bed. Sleep took her quickly.
She was slowly sinking down to the bottom of a vast ocean. She desperately hoped that the diving mech would stand up the pressure. It was dark, the flares she sent out casting such little light in the void. He was listening to an audio-message found next to a dead krogan, "O Blue Rose of Illium, if these humble words reach you, then I have joined my ancestors. My dream was to be by your side, a weed beside your beauty, twining together in the warm Tuchanka sun…" She was in agony because she just watched Garrus take a rocket to the face, he was lying on the floor covered in his own blue blood gasping for breath and barely alive, a man standing next to her in yellow armor with a scarred up face told her, "He's not gonna to make it." She was standing on a metal platform, a distorted holographic image was speaking to her, "But the genocide of an entire species is a long, slow process. Years passed. Decades, centuries. The reapers persisted. And my energy reserves were dwindling."
"Rise and shine, Commander!" Joker's voice came over the comm waking Shepard from her slumber.
She opened her eyes and looked around the dark room, the faint glow coming from her laptop orientating her to her location. She sat up in the bed and pinched the bridge of her nose. Her head was killing her.
"What is it, Joker?" Shepard asked.
"ETA to Macedon 30 minutes. Thought you might like some breakfast before you get to work," Joker said.
"Alright, thanks Joker," Shepard said.
"Anytime," Joker said.