Chapter 9: One Of The Guys
The Normandy's scanners picked up some anomalies on a planet called Sharjila. They weren't certain what was down there, but Shepard thought it was worth looking into so she told Joker to have Tali and Kaidan suit up and meet her at the Mako. Shepard donned her armor and got her guns strapped on before heading to the Mako. Tali was already waiting and she could see Kaidan heading their way. She opened the door on the Mako and stood back for Tali to climb inside. Once Tali was secure in her seat, Shepard climbed into the driver's seat and strapped herself in. A moment later, Kaidan climbed in the other side.
"What have we got, Commander?" Kaidan asked while they waited for Joker to drop the Mako.
"Not sure, the scanners showed signs of debris fields and other anomalies. A secured area of some sort as well. We're not sure what it is so we're going in to have a look," Shepard explained.
"Do you think that it could be Saren, or more geth?" Tali asked.
"Maybe, there's a good chance. We don't know what's in this area or exactly what it is that Saren is after other than something he called the Conduit. If there is something here he wants – then there is something here we want, too," Shepard said.
It's not Saren, it's not the geth. It's pirates and slavers. General scum. You don't need to be here. You have more important things to worry about.
The ship opened up and the Mako was released, Shepard loved the feel of the drop. Though, a glance over her shoulder at Tali's desperate grip on the handholds told her that Tali did not feel the same. She couldn't help but to smile, imagining the terrified look that must be on the quarian's face behind that mask. The Mako hit the ground and rolled forward with its momentum before coming to a stop. Shepard pulled up the systems scanners, trying to zero in on the anomalies the Normandy detected.
They found a crashed probe not far from the drop site and recovered what they could from it before heading on to the next location. An old abandoned campsite held a capsule of asari design; it contained journal entries from an asari matriarch. She couldn't spend much time looking over them herself, this planet had a high pressure level and it wasn't safe for her or her crew to be outside of the Mako for very long. She put them back in the small capsule to protect them and took them with her to the Mako. She would ask Liara to make copies of them along with the turian insignias and the salarian ID tags she had found for their own records before taking them to the Council. Did turians have museums, she wondered, she was sure the asari probably did.
They took the Mako and headed to the last location of interest on the scanners. As they got closer to the area, little red triangles indicating enemy activity began popping up on the Mako's scanners. In the distance, Shepard caught sight of a building nestled down in between the rocky peaks. Moving slowly, Shepard got the Mako into a position of cover where she could see the area. It was heavily guarded, complete with sniper nests, barricades and asari guards roaming on foot. She was a little surprised to see the asari outside of the compound; she supposed the pressure of the atmosphere must not be a problem for them. She was a little disappointed that it wasn't geth that they were facing; thinking it probably meant that this had nothing to do with Saren. Still, why was there a heavily guarded compound in an area otherwise void of life? She needed to check it out. She'd give them the 'fire on sight' test.
"Hold on, guys," Shepard said. "We're going in; if they fire on us we'll be forced to assume they are hostiles. If they hail us, we'll talk to them and see what this place is."
Shepard slowly drove the Mako up over a ridge and down towards the area. She went at a relaxed pace so that the approaching vehicle didn't come off as an immediate threat and so that if they needed to take cover again they could do so more quickly. As soon as the Mako came into sight, the snipers started firing and the ground soldiers started flinging biotics and bullets.
"Well, there's our answer. Tali, on the guns. Kaidan, keep watch on the shields," Shepard ordered.
Instead of taking cover, Shepard went for a more aggressive tactic and drove straight for the building. Tali using the Mako's guns to take out as many as she could get before Shepard pulled the Mako right up next to the building. Tali swung the guns around and took out those who were in sight before signaling to Shepard to change position. Shepard moved the Mako around the building lining up more asari for Tali to shoot down.
"Lost shields," Kaidan said.
Shepard reversed the Mako until it was hidden behind the building while they recovered the shields. Tali picked off any stupid enough to try to come close to the Mako. When the shields were back up, they moved to the opposite side of the building and finished off the few stragglers. They parked the Mako near the building entrance and went inside.
It took them a few minutes to clear out the inside of the building, killing a couple of krogan and too many asari to count. The area was laid out to the enemy's advantage giving them multiple positions of cover while her team only had the door until they could press further into the room. Once the area was cleared, Shepard began looking around trying to ascertain what these people were doing here. A side room on the main floor had several weapons lockers and a medical station, but nothing to explain the purpose of this stronghold. Upstairs, Shepard found a desk with a computer. She sat down and began digging; it didn't take her more than a minute to understand exactly what was going on here and exactly why she had been contacted by Nassana Dantius.
"Well now… this is interesting," Shepard said.
"What did you find?" Tali asked.
Kaidan stayed by the door to the office watching in case anyone else showed up while Tali took up station next to Shepard. Shepard had several files open on the computer and pointed to a document that laid out the transport costs for the slaves that had been bought and sold through this location.
"They were slavers, and pirates by the looks of things. What's captured my attention, however, is that the leader of this fine organization is sister to one Nassana Dantius. Right after we reached the Artemis system, I received a transmission from Dantius – who is apparently an asari ambassador on the Citadel – telling me that she had a job for me if I was interested. Wanted me to meet her on the Citadel to discuss it in person," Shepard said.
Kaidan glanced over, "Was Dantius involved with her sister's activities?"
"I'm not seeing anything to indicate that she was, but I do get the impression that Dantius knew about her sister's slave trade. The Council must not know about this. It's not really cool to hold her sister's activities against her if she wasn't involved, but if she knew about these activities and didn't report them; Dantius could be in for a lot of trouble. I've downloaded these files. Let's get out of here," Shepard said.
Back on the Normandy, Shepard went to the cockpit and leaned in over the empty co-pilot seat.
"Back to the Citadel, Commander?" Joker asked.
"No, change of plans. I'm going to check out some of the reports we've received from the Alliance and other sources involving clusters nearby. Hades Gamma and then over to the Horsehead Nebula; that's where Noveria is as well. Seems like this Dantius woman might could use a little time to sweat. We'll get back to the Citadel soon enough, we'll need to refuel and restock but after what I just found down there, I'm in no hurry to get to Dantius," Shepard said.
"What did you find?" Joker asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Evidence that her sister was in the slave trade and she knew about it," Shepard said.
"Was?" Joker asked.
Shepard smiled and nodded, "Was. Let me know if Dantius tries to contact us again."
"Aye, aye. Oh, and Commander? I prefer gold to silver. You know, for my medal," Joker said with a shrug as he looked up at Shepard. "I figured you'd recommend me for one since I pulled your, uh, boots out of the fire."
Shepard smirked and stood up straight, "If we present you with a medal, you'll end up sitting on stage listening to politicians make speeches for a couple of hours."
Joker nodded, "That's a good point. They'd probably make me shave, too. I spent the last seven weeks working on this baby. No medal's worth that. So, Commander, why don't you tell me why you're really here?"
Because you're one of her best friends and she doesn't know it yet. Talking to you was just the first thing she thought to do when she got back on the ship.
Shepard took a minute to mull that over; she wasn't sure why she was there, really. She could have told Joker all of that from anywhere on the ship. Still, he gave her the opening; she might as well use it to her advantage and get to know the guy a little better. If he'd let her.
"How'd you end up joining the Alliance?" Shepard asked.
"If you're looking for an inspirational tale of the crippled kid overcoming impossible odds, you're going to be disappointed," Joker said. "My mother was a civilian contractor working for the Alliance. I basically grew up on the Arcturus station, back when they were building up the fleets. Spend all that time around Alliance ships and there's a good chance you'll end up going to the Academy."
Shepard nodded and then patted the headrest of Joker's seat, "I have to go."
"Alright. See ya," Joker said.
Shepard made her way to the galaxy map and put in the coordinates for the Hades Gamma cluster. There had been reports of a kidnapped chairman of the Parliament Subcommittee on Transhuman Studies. The report indicated that it was believed the chairman was being held by a group of biotics on a derelict freighter in the Farinata System. Another report said that a survey team had dropped out of contact in the Antaeus System.
Shepard went down to the cargo bay to change out weapons in the lockers and sell off what they didn't need to the requisitions officer. Robert, she remembered finally. His name was Robert Davis. When she was done with that, she headed over to Ashley. She wanted to check up on the woman, make sure she was holding it together after Eden Prime.
"Commander," Ashley said by way of greeting.
"What's your opinion on the last mission?" Shepard asked remembering the vague question got Ashley talking well last time.
"Not sure I buy Dr. T'Soni's story. About her and her mom not talking. They're family, right?" Ashley said shaking her head.
"I think she's being straight with us. Or, at least, I don't think she lies very often," Shepard said.
"Yeah, she's probably really bad at it," Ashley said nodding. "Too bad those ruins got destroyed. I mean, they lasted thousands of years. That's impressive."
Shepard cringed recalling Councilor Sparatus' remarks about the destruction of the ruins.
"Do you have a few minutes to talk one-on-one?" Shepard asked.
"Sure. I was hoping to get a minute of your time. Off the record," Ashley stammered.
"I keep an open-door policy. If you have any concerns, lay them on me," Shepard said.
Ashley looked down at the floor in front of her for a moment before taking a deep breath, "Alright. I know things are different aboard the Normandy, but – I'm concerned about the aliens. Vakarian and Wrex. With all due respect, Commander, should they have full access to the ship?"
"They may not serve the Alliance, Chief, but they're allies. At least as far as Saren goes," Shepard said.
"This is the most advanced ship in the Alliance Navy. I don't think we should give them free reign to poke around the vital systems. Engines. Sensors. Weapons," Ashley said.
"You don't trust the Alliance's allies?" Shepard asked beginning to feel vaguely annoyed.
"I'm not sure I'd call the Council races allies. We – humanity, I mean – have to learn to rely on ourselves," Ashley said.
"Standing up for ourselves doesn't mean standing alone," Shepard said.
"I don't think we should turn down allies. I just think we shouldn't bet everything on them staying allies," Ashley said. "As noble as the Council members seem now, if their backs are against the wall, they'll abandon us."
"You've got a pessimistic view of the universe, Williams," Shepard said shaking her head slightly.
"A pessimist is what an optimist calls a realist," Ashley said. "Look. If you're fighting a bear, and the only way for you to survive is to sic your dog on it and run, you'll do it. As much as you love your dog, it isn't human. It's not racism. Not really. Members of their species will always be more important to them than humans are."
And apparently humans will always be more important to you than other species, so what's your point, Williams, Shepard thought. Dogs are great, but we never considered them to be people. We recognize the alien species as people; they recognize us as people. That makes things very different.
"These seem like deeply-held beliefs, Williams. What made you think this way?" Shepard asked.
"My family's defended the Alliance since it was founded. My father, my grandfather, great-grandmother – they all picked up a rifle and swore the Oath of Service. I guess we just tend to think of Earth's interests as our own," Ashley said.
"You're lucky. I lost my family on Mindoir. Are you related to anyone I'd have heard of?" Shepard asked, trying to ease the tension.
"Couldn't say, Commander. I read about Mindoir. The Alliance screwed the pooch on that one. Should have had a bigger garrison. Is that why you're out here? To take the fight to the pirates?" Ashley asked.
"Mainly, I wanted to serve. Protect the Alliance, save lives. You know," Shepard said.
"Glad to hear it. I'd hate to think you're out here for a free college education," Ashley said.
"It doesn't sound like you've worked with aliens before," Shepard said wanting to better understand the woman's stance.
Ashley shook her head, "No ma'am. Mainly I've been groundside. Part of the surface garrison forces. I did get a rotation on a space station for training. 'Every marine, a rifleman; every rifleman, zee-gee certified.'"
"That's odd. Your record is spotless, and your technical scores are exemplary. You should be serving with the fleet," Shepard said.
"Anyway, that's why I haven't served with many aliens, Commander," Ashley said.
That's a sore spot, Shepard thought. Probably more to it than that. Leave it be for now.
"Alright. I can see where your concerns are coming from, Williams. But this is a multilateral mission. You're going to have to work with aliens, like it or not," Shepard said.
"It won't be a problem, Commander. You say 'jump,' I say 'how high.' You tell me to kiss a turian, I'll ask which cheek," Ashley said.
Shepard shook her head, "I don't think kissing turians will be necessary."
"You never know, Commander," Ashley said.
"Dismissed, Chief," Shepard said.
"Ma'am," Ashley said.
Shepard stopped by to say hello to Wrex on her way to the elevator. The krogan was in the same place as usual, watching the cargo bay like he expected Saren to pop up out of nowhere ready for a fight.
"So, we've got Saren on the run," Wrex said pushing himself off the wall.
"It won't be long now. Saren's good, but I'm better," Shepard said with a smile.
"Good? He's rotten. To the core. I could tell as soon as I met him," Wrex said.
"Why didn't you tell me this sooner?" Shepard asked annoyed and too focused now to explain the human idiom.
"I would've if I thought it was important," Wrex said.
"I think I'd like to hear about it just the same," Shepard said her brow furrowing.
"This was a while ago. A bunch of mercs were bragging about a job out near the edges of the Terminus Systems. They said it paid well and the boss was never around to ride them. They said he was looking for more men, too. So, I checked it out," Wrex said.
"I didn't know Saren was openly recruiting mercs," Shepard said, maybe that explained the krogan working with him she thought.
That and he's breeding them on Virmire.
"It wasn't that open. And he only showed his face once. We'd been raiding ships in the area for months when we took out this massive cargo freighter. Our biggest haul yet. I was on board checking bodies for valuables, looking for extra credits. That's when I saw him," Wrex said.
"What did Saren want with the ship?" Shepard asked.
"I don't know what he wanted. He was just moving through the ship. Watching. Couple of the mercs called him by name, but he never spoke to them. Never spoke to anyone. I had a really bad feeling about him, so I got the hell out. Didn't even wait to get paid," Wrex said.
"What kind of cargo was the freighter carrying? What was Saren after?" Shepard pumped Wrex for more information.
"I don't know. All I saw on that ship was food and medical supplies. There were some basic weapons, but nothing big. If there was anything of value on that ship, I didn't see it. That's why I didn't mention it sooner," Wrex said.
"Whose ship was it?" Shepard asked, still trying to understand what Saren was after.
"It was a volus trading vessel. Big one, lots of guards. But they were no match for us," Wrex said.
"That's the only time you saw him?" asked Shepard.
"Yeah. Didn't even know who he was. Still wouldn't if I hadn't joined up with you. But my instincts were right. Every other merc on that mission turned up dead within a week. Every damn one," Wrex said.
Shepard stood there, her thoughts racing through her head. Was there any way she could find out what ship it was, when this happened? Maybe she could get a manifest for everything that was on that ship at that time. She glanced back up at Wrex who was watching her, his big red eyes studied her but revealed nothing.
"So long, Wrex," Shepard said.
"Shepard," said Wrex.
She was on her way back towards the elevator when she glanced over and saw Garrus watching her as he fiddled with his visor. A smile spread across her lips and she changed course.
"Commander. How are you?" Garrus asked.
Shepard watched him fiddle with something on his visor for a moment.
"Why did you want to be a C-Sec officer in the first place?" Shepard asked.
"Hm. That's a good question. There were several reasons, I guess," Garrus said.
"Like what?" Shepard prodded.
Garrus shuffled his feet and looked off to the side for a moment, "Probably the same as most officers. I wanted to fight injustice, wanted to help people. I guess my father had something to do with it, too. He was C-Sec. One of the best. I grew up hearing about his accomplishments or seeing his picture on the vids after a big arrest. He's taking my resignation pretty hard."
"He's not impressed that you're going after Saren?" Shepard asked.
"My father's a C-Sec man to the bone. 'Do things right, or don't do them at all,' he says. He thinks I'm being too rash. Too impatient. He's worried I'll become just like Saren. He actually talked me out of becoming a Spectre when I was younger. For the same reasons," Garrus said.
"You were asked to be a Spectre?" Shepard asked, though she had to admit she wasn't very surprised.
"Well, I was targeted as a possible Spectre candidate. Me and about a thousand other turian military recruits. I could have received special training, but my father didn't like it. He despises the Spectres. He hates the idea of someone having unlimited power with no accountability. He wouldn't like you, Commander. No offense," Garrus said.
"Spoken like a true C-Sec officer," Shepard said with a sardonic chuckle.
"Yeah. It's a speech I've heard one too many times," Garrus said. "But Saren's not going to play by our rules. C-Sec's rules. If you want to nail Saren, you need to send someone who isn't restricted by policies and procedures," Garrus said.
"You're a quick learner, Garrus. We'll beat him at his own game. It's the only way to stop someone like him," Shepard said.
"I'm right behind you, Commander," Garrus said. "Uh, before you go?"
Shepard turned back around to face him, "Yeah?"
"Lie to me," Garrus said.
Shepard laughed, "Still Vakarian, really?"
"Come on, lie to me," Garrus pleaded.
"Alright, alright. Hmmm let's see. I was married for ten years to a man named Marshall. We had three children together before we divorced; he fell in love with a man named Steven and left me and the kids. Times were really rough for a long time. I did my best trying to raise them on my own, but I just wasn't able to handle it. I guess I'm just not cut out for motherhood. I ended up putting the children up for adoption, and then I joined the Alliance. I thought that if I could get on a ship, get far enough away from Earth, that I could make myself forget my failures. Truth is, not a day goes by that I don't think about Jesse, Sam, and Robin. I find myself wondering if they remember me; if they hate me. What they look like now. If they're happy," Shepard said.
Garrus was squinting in concentration, "Okay, okay. Making stuff up without context is easy. Poor Jess, Sam, and Robin. How about… let me ask you a question. A real question and you lie to me?"
Shepard laughed, "Garrus, I've got work to do."
"Humor me, Shepard, just one question. I swear," Garrus said.
Shepard nodded, "Alright, shoot."
"Spirits woman, you're lucky I've spent time around humans. You don't tell turians to shoot unless you really mean shoot," Garrus shook his head slightly.
"Garrus…" Shepard whined.
"Alright. On the Citadel, with the AI, you looked like something scared the life out of you. What happened?" Garrus asked.
Shepard's breath caught, and she saw Garrus' eye twitch. He'd seen her heartrate spike. His mandibles fluttered.
"No. Ask something else," Shepard said flatly.
He cocked his head to the side, and pulled his mandibles in tight. Shepard could tell that his every instinct as a C-Sec officer was telling him to sink his teeth into that one and shake it until something fell loose. Shepard stared at him with her jaw clenched.
"Just not that, please. I don't even want to think about that… I – I can't," Shepard said.
"Hmm, okay. At the Citadel, before we boarded the Normandy, you said you intended to find Saren and take him down regardless of what Anderson and Udina said. Would you have followed orders to not look for Saren if you hadn't been given Spectre status?" Garrus asked.
"Of course, I always do everything by the book," Shepard said with a smile.
"Damnit. Shepard you're killing me. Wait. How am I supposed to know that you aren't just telling me the truth to pass it off as a lie? Hell, how am I supposed to ever believe anything you ever say to me, now?" Garrus asked.
Shepard smiled and raised an eyebrow.
"Well, Vakarian," she drawled, "I suppose you'll just have to learn to trust me. Now, I should go."
Shepard walked away and just as she was about to step on to the elevator she heard Garrus call after her.
"You're evil, woman. Pure evil!" he said.
She stepped into the elevator and pushed the button, as the door was closing she winked at him. Shepard spent the next several hours in her cabin filling out reports and doing research on the turians and their role in the Krogan Rebellions. She sincerely hoped that Wrex wasn't going to prove to be hostile towards Garrus. Wrex was understandably carrying around a lot of bad feelings about the genophage and it was the turians that released the biological weapon. Granted, as Wrex said, the salarians created it but that hardly negated the turians actions.
Joker let Shepard know that they had arrived at the Hades Gamma cluster. Shepard went back to the CIC and began scanning the systems. She found signs of the survey team on Trebin, in the Antaeus system. Shepard took Liara and Wrex down with her to investigate. She wanted to see how Lira handled herself on the field before she took her into a serious battle. Even if Liara was as supportive of Shepard as she seemed to be, there was no guarantees that things wouldn't change if Liara had to face off against her mother.
On the surface they ran across a thresher maw and some scavengers at a crash site but nothing major. No sign of geth activity, no sign of Saren. Shepard found an area littered with crashed satellites, nearby was a device transmitting a tightbeam signal that must have interfered with the survey teams satellites' GPS systems, causing them to crash. She disabled the device before heading to the research base. They found that the research base was abandoned. There weren't any bodies, no signs that anyone had been there for a while. Research logs found in one of the shelters indicated that the team had found some sort of alien technology; the reports were vague though, providing no real information on what it was the team found. Maps marked the excavation site, and it wasn't far from the camp.
The team piled back into the Mako and went to the excavation site. The exterior set up was similar to the place they found Liara, but on a smaller scale. Shepard headed up the ramp and into the dig site. They made their way through the tunnel and cave systems until they came to a room filled with the same husk creatures that the geth had turned people into back on Eden Prime. The husks swarmed the area, coming straight for Shepard and her team like nothing more than rabid animals.
When all the husks were dead, Liara spoke up, "I have heard of this before. Whatever alien technology the survey team unearthed must have turned them into mindless fanatics. Machine cultists."
"Whatever they found, it's long gone now," Wrex said.
"We need to sweep the area and see if we can find anything. This is the same thing I saw on Eden Prime. The geth were putting humans on these spikes and the spikes were somehow transforming them into these husks. There might be something here than can tell us more about what the geth were doing to those people," Shepard said.
"Maybe this is where the geth got the tech in the first place," Wrex said.
"Could be, come on," Shepard said.
As they neared the back of the room, two doors opened and more husks swarmed out. Liara's Singularity proved to be the most useful tactic to use against the husks. They were clustered together and had no comprehension of what the floating biotic sphere meant and so made no efforts to avoid being pulled up into the field.
When the last one fell, Shepard said, "That's all of them. All of the ExoGeni surveyors that were supposed to be here. They're all accounted for."
In the backrooms, they found spikes similar to what the geth had used on Eden Prime. Shepard scanned one of them with her omni-tool and sent the readings to Anderson. She hoped he could get an Alliance team working on analyzing the data. There had been a strange glowing orb in the first room where they encountered the husks as well. She stopped to try to scan the orb on the way back out but whatever it was caused her omni-tool to go on the fritz. The best she could do was to include a description of it and send the coordinates for it in the report to Anderson and the Council.
Back on the Normandy she set the coordinates for the Farinata system and then went down to Engineering to talk to Tali. She found the quarian quietly working at a terminal. Shepard stood next to Tali before leaning against the control station, looking over her shoulder to make sure she wasn't accidentally pushing any buttons with her hip. Tali stopped her work and turned to Shepard.
"Oh. Hello, Shepard," Tali sounded down.
"Are you okay?" Shepard asked, she liked talking to Tali she was usually so animated and expressive that it made it easy to know what the quarian was feeling without being able to see her facial gestures.
"I don't know. Your ship is amazing, and your crew's been really great to me. Especially your chief engineer. But I just sort of feel… out of place. The Normandy runs so smooth it feels like we're not even moving. And the engines are so quiet. How do you sleep at night?" Tali said.
"The silence wakes you up?" Shepard asked finding the idea odd.
"Back on the flotilla, the last thing you want to hear is silence. It means an engine's died or an air filter's shut down. I guess you don't have to worry about that here, but old habits die hard. But it's more than just the silence. This ship feels so empty; it's like half the crew is missing. Back home, I couldn't wait to go on my Pilgrimage. I couldn't wait to get away from the crowds. Now that I'm out here, I kind of miss them," Tali said.
"Sometimes we don't appreciate what we have until it's gone," Shepard said.
"That's true. I'm starting to wonder if that's what the Pilgrimage is really about. It's given me a whole new perspective on my people and our culture. You know, there's always a few who go on their Pilgrimages and never return. I always assumed something bad happened to them, but maybe they just wanted a different life," Tali said.
"You do plan to return to the Migrant Fleet, right?" Shepard asked.
"I could never abandon my people, Shepard. I will go back eventually. But we have to stop Saren first. Otherwise, I might not have a home to go back to," Tali said.
Shepard nodded in understanding. She wondered if she could get a recording of the engines from the flotilla or something to help Tali sleep. Maybe even just a noise machine from the Citadel, if they had them. She use to have one in her room when she was a kid that she could choose different sounds from. There was a recording of ocean waves, sounds of traffic, thunderstorms, and even crickets. Shepard always liked to listen to the thunderstorms as she fell asleep at night. Always did love a good storm. She'll be okay, though. She'll adjust. Tali'Zorah vas Normandy is made of stronger stuff than she thinks.
"I should go," Shepard said.
"See you later," Tali said.
Shepard made her way back to her cabin; she had more reports to write and to send off. She really hated reports, but she knew why they were necessary. She included the data she retrieved from the spikes and the description of the orb they had found in her report, as well as an explanation of how the spikes somehow changed the ExoGeni team into the husks. She made sure to express the similarities between the ExoGeni team and what happened on Eden Prime. She knew Anderson would note the connection right away, but he was there, he had seen some of what took place. The Council, on the other hand, she expected would find some way to deny the connection if they didn't just outright deny the existence of the husks. She wondered if they would always doubt everything she said, and if so, what was the point of making her Spectre. They will doubt it until the reapers invade in force, and then they will expect you to figure out a way to fight off the reapers while they refuse to help until they have no other option. To the report she was sending to the Council she added a note about the matriarch writings, turian insignias, and salarian ID tags.
She carefully boxed up the artifacts and left her cabin. Kaidan saw her headed towards the med bay with her hands full and offered to take the box for her.
"I've got it, but I wouldn't mind it if you got that door for me," Shepard said.
"Of course, Commander," he said rushing ahead of her to open the med bay door.
"Thanks, Kaidan," she said stepping into the room.
"Anytime, Shepard," Kaidan said as he lingered around.
Shepard raised an eyebrow, "Oh, uh, you could get the door to Liara's office for me to I guess."
"Yes, ma'am," Kaidan said as he jogged across the med bay to open Liara's door.
"Kaidan. Is there something…" Shepard heard Liara's voice from the other room.
"Oh, no, sorry. I didn't mean to just barge in on you. Sorry. Uh, Shepard's coming. She's got a box and uh… I was just getting the door for her," Kaidan said.
"I see, well, that is kind of you," Liara said.
Shepard caught the faint blush on Kaidan's cheeks as she passed him to enter the room.
"Thanks, Kaidan," Shepard said.
Kaidan nodded and continued to stand there until the two women turned to look at him expectantly.
"Oh, uh, sorry. I'll leave you two to talk," Kaidan said leaving the room and letting the door close behind him.
"So not smooth," Shepard mumbled to herself with a chuckle.
Liara stood by her desk watching Shepard as she set the box down carefully. Her curiosity and excitement making her youth seem evident. It was like watching a child be handed a present on their birthday. Shepard couldn't help but to smile at the asari.
"I have a task for you, if you don't mind," Shepard began.
She could tell Liara was straining to see into the box without being obvious, "Yes, Shepard, I will help in any way that I can."
"Excellent. While on the field, I've found a few artifacts. They'll need to be taken to the Council, but I would like for you to create detailed reports on them for our own records. I'd like them to be scanned so that we have images to reference, as well as written descriptions of the items and any information you can find on them should be attached to the reports," Shepard said waving Liara over.
Liara wasted no time closing the space between herself and the box. Peering down inside she let out an excited gasp.
"Shepard, these are excellent finds! They are not prothean, so I'm sure my knowledge on them will be limited. I will do some research. May I?" Liara asked.
"By all means, I leave them in your capable hands Dr. T'soni. You are the archeologist after all," Shepard said.
Liara reached into the box and very carefully lifted out a turian insignia before laying it out flat on a cleared table space.
"I believe this is from one of the turian colonies lost during the Unification World. I do not know much about those colonies so I will have to do some research to find out which colony. Where did you find this?" Liara asked.
Shepard handed Liara a datapad, "A brief description, cluster, system, and planet name as well as coordinates is listed here for each item."
Liara took the datapad and skimmed it briefly, "Oh, I see you have found several as well as some ID tags from salarian corpses… and Shepard, am I understanding the correctly? By the Goddess, you have also located writings from an asari matriarch?"
"Correct," Shepard said.
"Oh, this is very exciting. I will get started cataloging all of these right away. Have you showed these insignias to Garrus?" Liara asked.
"No, I guess it didn't occur to me. You think he'd want to see them?" Shepard asked.
"How could he not? This is the history of his people! I will call him and ask him if he would like to come to my office to see them. I do not want to move them too much," Liara shuddered slightly, "I cannot imagine that the cargo bay would be the best atmosphere for artifacts either."
Shepard suppressed a laugh, "I should go. I'll leave you to it, Liara. Thanks."
The other woman was already opening her omni-tool to call Garrus as Shepard left the office. Kaidan was still in the med bay talking to Dr. Chakwas. He was turned to where he could see Liara's office door though, and it was more than obvious that he had stuck around to wait for Shepard to come back out. Dr. Chakwas had a knowing grin on her face as she watched Kaidan's attention slide to the Commander.
"Thanks, Dr. Chakwas. I'll uh, I'll keep that in mind," Kaidan said to the older woman.
"Of course, Lieutenant. And don't forget, in a pinch, caffeine can sometimes help with migraines," Dr. Chakwas said.
Shepard walked past the doctor and Kaidan and out of the med bay door. She'd taken four steps when Kaidan was at her side. Shepard glanced over at him.
"Kaidan, is there something you need?" Shepard asked.
"I just thought I'd see how you were doing. I mean, after dealing with the slavers… I just thought, you know considering your past…" Kaidan trailed off.
Damn it if this man hasn't got a heart of gold, Shepard thought. She stopped walking and turned to look at Kaidan. He waited patiently, watching her as she quietly studied his face. He had a squared jawline, but otherwise soft features. His short hair was nearly as dark as hers. His eyes were a light, soulful brown. He was clean shaven but she could see the fine traces of stubble, mapping out where his beard would be if he grew one. Would it really be so bad to let this man love her; to let herself love him in return? Are you really doing this? I know you think that you might crush him, but the fact is he's going to crush you if you do this. Hell, he'll crush you even if you don't, if he lives through Virmire, but at least it won't hurt quite so bad when those soft eyes look at you with contempt and utter disgust.
"I'm fine, Kaidan. Thank you for asking, though," Shepard said.
"Sure, Commander. But if you ever decide, you know, that you want to talk about it or anything really, you know where to find me," Kaidan said before leaving her to return to his station.
Shepard went back to her cabin and started researching the asari. A couple of hours later and Joker was notifying her that they were approaching the Farinata system. Shepard saved the files she was working with and left her cabin to head up to the CIC. Once in the Farinata system, finding the MSV Ontario was relatively easy. The Farinata was a small system, home to only three planets and two asteroid belts.
The report said that they would be dealing with fanatical biotics, so Shepard thought it best to bring Liara and Kaidan along with her for this run. They docked the Normandy with the MSV Ontario and boarded the vessel. Shepard made her way through the ship to where her scanners were telling her she would find people. She had her weapon ready but would give them the 'fire on sight' test before she started shooting herself. This was a hostage situation, and she did not know the nature of the demands being made, if any. As soon as the ship's crew saw Shepard and her team, they failed the test.
"Intruders! Kill the hostage!" someone yelled out an order.
Instantly Kaidan, Liara, and Shepard were fighting off wave after wave of biotic humans hell bent on destroying them. At least that's what they kept saying. They fought off the biotics and rushed through the ship, checking each room until they found the one with the hostage. Shepard opened the door and saw a man on his knees, his hands on top of his head. A man in military casual dress stood behind him with a gun to his head.
"See how it is? You write letters and everyone ignores you. Force is the only thing people appreciate. So how about if I kill Chairman Burns and finish this charade?" the man with the gun said.
"Please! I was trying to help you people!" the man on his knees begged.
The others in the room stood by complacent, watching as their obvious leader threatened to shoot the man in the back of the head.
Shepard held up a hand, "Let's not do anything we're all going to regret."
"Why not? What have we got to lose?" the gunman asked. "Since the chairman here decided that we didn't get reparations, we've got nothing left to live for!"
"But I've changed my mind! Seeing y-you all, it's c-clear that you all d-deserve…" Chairman Burns stammered.
"You had your chance! Some L2s are nearly crippled from side effects of the implants, but you voted against reparations!" the gunman said.
Shepard spared a glance over her shoulder at Kaidan; he had an L2 implant. It's what caused his migraines according to Dr. Chakwas. She saw Kaidan's face pinched tight with disapproval.
"I'm giving you a choice. Put down your weapons and surrender," Shepard said.
The gunman fired a shot into the back of the chairman's head and his body crumpled to the floor. If you had saved him, he would have gotten the reparations pushed through. Now he's dead and you have to kill the rest. Nice work, Shepard.
"As if we'd trust the Alliance after what it did to us. Get them!" he yelled to his followers.
"Damn it!" Shepard cursed, taking aim at the leader and firing.
The fight didn't last long and Shepard was so glad she'd thought to bring her best biotics with her, though now she was concerned what affect this would have on Kaidan. She leaned down next to the chairman and felt for a pulse. With a point blank shot to the back of the head, she knew there was no real chance he'd still be alive but she had to check. Her fingers found nothing, and a scan with her omni-tool confirmed the man was dead.
"Damn it," Shepard said again.
They made their way back to the Mako as Shepard replayed the conversation in her head, wondering if there was anything that she could have done differently. Perhaps she shouldn't have tried to talk the man down, maybe she should have just shot him the second she walked in and saw his gun to the chairman's head. Could she have saved the chairman, then? She radioed Joker for a pick up.
Back on the Normandy, Shepard stowed her gear and then went to talk to Kaidan. She wasn't sure where to start or what to say, so she was relieved when he started talking first.
"Do you have some time to talk now, Commander," Kaidan asked when she approached him.
"Of course. Have a seat," Shepard said.
"We've played it pretty close to the book so far. But we're a long way from backup. We've got some tough calls to make. I'm just saying… try to leave yourself a way out. I've seen what cutting corners can do to someone. And I'd hate to have that happen to you, Shepard. Commander," Kaidan said.
"This a personal observation, Kaidan?" Shepard asked raising her eyebrows.
"Maybe that's not my place. I don't want to send any bad signals, Commander. Just, uh, working on what I've picked up," Kaidan said. "You tell me if I'm going too far."
"I'm listening. Tell me why you feel the need to speak up," Shepard said.
"I'm not questioning any decision you've made, Shepard. Let me be clear about that. It's just my experience that once someone lets something slide; it tends to pick up speed. You get my meaning?" Kaidan asked.
Shepard wasn't clear on what the hell the lieutenant was talking about, what had she let slide? Was this about the biotics? She had tried to talk the man down, she didn't let anything slide.
"You're talking about a particular example, aren't you?" Shepard asked starting to feel her ire rise.
"You know the records about the biotic training on Jump Zero? They're all classified. Because the Alliance made mistakes. After first contact, Conatix was set up to track element zero exposures and develop implants for humans. Once we had an embassy on the Citadel, Conatix could bring in 'experts' instead of taking it slow," Kaidan said.
"The only experts would have to be aliens," Shepard said.
"Dead on. Turians, actually. That's why Conatix kept it a secret. They were afraid of what people back home would think. Asking the turians for help when we'd just fought a war with them," Kaidan said.
"The asari would have been more acceptable than the turians," Shepard said.
Especially seeing as the asari were all naturally inclined towards biotics and it was far less common with turians. Turians tended to be less powerful biotics as well. Shepard's research had also informed her that to be a biotic turian was to be frowned upon in their culture. Turian biotics tended to be placed into special units in the military, called Cabals and only used for specific missions.
"Yes, but the company didn't go through the Citadel. It would have made Earth look weak. So they discreetly hired some turian mercenaries," Kaidan said.
"Was there some reason we couldn't learn it on our own?" Shepard asked.
"They didn't know where to start. Hell, it took a couple years to even link biotics and eezo. Forget trying to get the kids to move stuff. They had trouble just helping them not break their own limbs. And their choice of teachers didn't help much," Kaidan said.
"I'm sure Conatix did what they thought was best," Shepard offered.
"It wasn't best for us. They brought in an ex-military turian named Commander Vyrnnus. To introduce himself, he liked to say, 'I was at the helm of the dreadnaught that killed your father'. I told him my dad wasn't even in the war. He retired to Vancouver. My family had an inland home that matured to new beachfront. Vyrnnus had it in for me after that. He cut corners, pushed hard. I mean, you either came out a superman or a wreck. And a lot of kids snapped. A few died. The point of all this – I guess – is that when you cut corners, it's not always obvious who pays for it," Kaidan said.
"So why are you telling me this? Are you saying I'm cutting corners somewhere?" Shepard asked, raising her shoulders defensively.
She didn't like where Kaidan was going with this. She felt insulted and she didn't even know why he we seemed to be questioning her integrity.
"I'm saying – it's probably inevitable that we'll have to. And when that happens, I want to help you. When someone important to you is up on a ledge, you help them. Keep them from mistakes better made by a kid," Kaidan said.
Mistakes better made by a kid. Shepard clenched her jaw.
"So you think you have leave to talk like we're more than officers?" Shepard asked.
"I got some signals. Maybe some static too, I guess. If I'm out of line, just say the word," Kaidan said with hesitation.
"Sorry, Kaidan. This was just a battlefield thing," Shepard said shutting the man down far more callously than she had intended.
"There's my answer, then. I'm sorry to have bothered you, Commander. I got some mixed signals. With your permission, I should return to my duties," Kaidan said the hurt evident in his voice and eyes.
Shepard turned to walk away but then stopped. She stood there for a moment, a few feet away from Kaidan with her back to the man. She tilted her head back and sighed towards the ceiling before turning back around.
"Kaidan, look. I'm sorry, I didn't need to be that harsh," Shepard started to explain.
Kaidan was looking down at the table in front of him, moving things around on his work table. He wasn't going to look at her. Shepard a step towards the man and tried again.
"Tell me to fuck off and I'll leave you alone, but Kaidan I want you to know that I think you're a great guy. Really, I do," Shepard said.
"You can save the 'it's not you, it's me' speech, Commander. I've heard it before," Kaidan said softly.
"Well that wasn't a 'fuck off' so I'm going to take that as an opening to talk," Shepard said as she went to stand next to Kaidan.
She turned so that she was facing the opposite direction of him and leaned back against his table with her arms crossed. Kaidan glanced at her briefly before looking down at his table again. Shepard was quiet for a moment, trying to gather her thoughts.
"You aren't the type I guy I normally go for, that is true. I won't lie to you about that. Does that mean I don't find you attractive? No, not at all. Does that mean that I don't like your personality? No, even if there are things about you that clash with my own personality. I think that if we were to pursue a relationship that there is a decent chance it could work out. I can tell that you are a very passionate person, you're optimistic; you're generous, and level-headed. You're intelligent, compassionate – like I said a great guy. I also have absolutely no doubt that you and I will fail to see eye to eye on many things, and although that might cause some turbulence, I think that we're both accepting enough of the faults of others to be able to work past that. The problem is, as clichéd as it might sound, is that I think eventually one of us would have to sacrifice who we are to make it work out," Shepard said looking at the wall but watching Kaidan out of her peripheral.
He remained quiet so she continued, "That's not something I want for myself. It's not something I want for you. That's ignoring the regulations that say we shouldn't because you're a subordinate. Sure, there's work-arounds to that, I know. But there's still more to it than even all of this…," She trailed off.
She turned her head to look at Kaidan; she wanted to know that he was listening to her. She could tell by the furrow in his brow, and the way he was gripping the edge of the table like it was a life raft that he was. He was staying quiet and letting her speak her peace, not because he needed to hear it, but because she needed to say it. This is hurting him. Maybe even worse than if you had just walked away.
"I've been through a lot, Kaidan. I've seen a lot of ugly things in my life and I've had to do a lot of ugly things. I strive to be a better person, but there is ugliness inside of me still. There always will be, and a part of how that has seemed to manifest for me is that I don't do this type of close relationship well. I've got no interest in commitment; no desire to get married and have children, no desire to retire on beach somewhere and watch my grandkids playing in the sand. I have no desire to wake up next to the same person every morning, Kaidan. I'm guessing that's the kind of life you want and that's not the kind of life I can give you. What I can give you, Kaidan, is comradery and if you'll let me, friendship," Shepard finally stopped talking.
It had been a long time since she had shared that much of herself with anyone. She watched as Kaidan took in her words. She could almost see the gears turning in his head as he processed things, as he put it before. He shook his head slightly and sighed.
"Alright. Damn it, Shepard. So what, just one of the guys, eh?" Kaidan asked looking up at her.
Shepard smiled, "Just one of the guys. But better, you know, because I'm a woman."
A grin spread across Kaidan's face and he chuckled, "That you are, Shepard. That you are."
"So are we good?" Shepard asked.
"Yeah, Shepard. We're good," Kaidan said nodding.
Shepard patted him on the back as she pushed away from his table, "Good, back to work then, lieutenant."
"Yes ma'am," Kaidan said.
On the stairs heading up to the CIC, Shepard blew out a deep breath, sending stray bits of hair flying about. She raked her hand through her hair, pushing it back out of her face. That worked out well; good. Back at the galaxy map, Shepard was about to set course for the Horsehead Nebula when Joker told her a message was coming in and he was patching it through.
"Thank you for dealing with the hostage situation, Commander. Chairman Burns' death was regrettable but I trust you did everything you could to save him. Your assistance above and beyond formal duties has been noted, Commander. Fifth Fleet out," the transmission said.
Shepard punched in the destination before stepping away from the galaxy map. It had been a long day and she needed her bed right now. It would take time to get back to a mass relay and then to the Horsehead Nebula. She probably had a few more hours in her if she needed them, but she didn't and damn it if she wasn't the boss on this ship. Shepard hit the showers and collapsed onto her bed twenty minutes later.