Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING! Oh and Orochimaru is dead, Itachi is dead, Sasuke is back, and rookie 9 are all about twenty years old. Please enjoy!
"I will not do this." The dark haired young man stated with a straight face. The pink haired woman in the door way took a moment to compose her expression before speaking,
"But Sasuke-kun, you have to! You're on probation and you can't refuse any mission that Tsunade-sama assigns you."
"I don't care, the dobe can do it." Sasuke nearly pouted, nearly. He's an Uchiha after all; he shows as many emotions as the average Hyuga, in other words, two smirks.
"Naruto is training his genin team right now." Sakura sighed since she had already told him that several times.
"I'll train them." Sasuke offered quickly. Sakura gave him a look,
"The last genin team that was assigned to you all quit the moment they saw you, except the girl who went back to the academy. Both of the boys are merchants now. You terrify all the academy students just by looking at them."
"Then why am I doing this if I scare them?" demanded the young man. Sakura smiled sweetly,
"Because you'll be wearing a mask of course."
"Why doesn't Kiba do this?"
"He's out on an escort mission."
"Shino?"
"He's in the hospital. He was poisoned after his last mission."
"Shikamaru?"
"He lives in sand now."
"Why not Lee? He was supposed to do this originally!"
"He's also in the hospital. He broke his leg."
"Neji?"
"He's Hinata's bodyguard and only allowed to leave her presence when she's with Naruto or another approved clan member."
"Choji?"
"He's out on a mission."
"Kakashi?" Sakura gave him a look that clearly asked if he was still at least partially sane.
"Gai?" He got another look from Sakura.
"Asuma?" A third look came in his direction.
"Ino?"
"She's pregnant."
"Hinata."
"Working at the hospital."
"Tenten."
"Hinata's bodyguard and Neji's training partner/fiancé and far too attached to her weaponry."
"You?"
"I've got training with Tsunade-sama and even if I didn't, I wouldn't do this for anything. Now finish getting ready. I'll be waiting with the clients." Sakura smiled again and then in a poof of pink smoke she was gone. Saskue glared at the place she just vacated before turning back to his costume. He was never going to live this down.
In another village, not to far away, Sakura was sitting near a group of small children. All of them were holding large straw baskets and looking at her with large, eager eyes.
"When can we start looking Miss Sakura?" asked a little boy with messy black hair. Sakura smiled at him,
"As soon as" she stopped as a poof of black smoke appeared. When it cleared there stood the creature the little children had been waiting for.
"IT'S THE EASTER BUNNY!"
Yes, there stood a person in an Easter bunny costume. It has bright yellow fur, floppy ears, large feet, and very unwieldy hands with a straw basket attacked to one. A yellow plastic rabbit mask covered the person's face. Sakura put her hand over her mouth to try to hold her laughter back and made a mental note to remember to compliment Ino for adding the pink ribbon around the neck.
"Okay kids, now the Easter bunny will tell you what to do!" Sakura told them in a perky voice and the kids quickly crowded around the rabbit's feet.
In a deadpan tone the bunny explained the rules and soon had the children scattering off, looking for eggs that Sasuke had hidden before hand.
"You're doing great Sasuke-kun." Sakura told the rabbit. The man managed to take off the mask, though the hands of the costume were very awkward, and revealed his handsome though glaring face.
"I'll get you for this Sakura."
"Of course you will." She left the clearing and came upon a little brown fox.
"You will be giving me copies won't you?" she asked it and in a poof of yellow smoke the fox had become Naruto, holding a camera.
"Of course!"
As he thought, the Uchiha avenger never lived the mission down.