A/N: P2 takes full responsibility of this chapter being so late. Isn't that right P2?
Yes it is P1.

Good.

Well, we (mostly P2) would like to apologize for the terrible delay of this chapter. And for sounding like the Bananas in Pyjamas.

Enjoy this chapter!

Xoxo
P1 + P2 (who, is alive)

Disclaimer: We looked in the mirror this morning, and discovered that we don't really look like JK Rowling…pity.

Chapter 10: The Wonderful Anecdotes of Ginerva Weasley

"Ginny, dear Merlin Ginny!"

Hermione stood outside of Ginny's door impatiently, wearing an expression of extreme frustration.

Hermione Granger's best friend Ginerva Weasley – formerly known as Ron Weasley's little sister, or Weaslette (to one blond in particular) – was not known by her family name anymore…she was more famous for her particular, as they say, "talents".

As Hermione stood outside her friends door, she had to ponder on who was in Ginny's room now. Could it be the great Harry Potter ("He's not good with his tongue…but his hands!"), or maybe Dean Thomas ("It's a chode. I swear it's a chode!") Or could she have finally gotten her hands on the mysterious and elusive Blaise Zabini? ("I heard he's huge! What I would do to get my hands on him!"). There was only one way to find out. Hermione braced herself, she knew what she was about to see would not be pretty.

Seamus Finnegan.
Well, at least it's somebody new Hermione thought once she walked through the door (after getting over the initial shock).

"Ahhh! My eyes, my eyes!"

"Hermione! What are you doing here! Haven't you ever heard of knocking?"

"Haven't you ever heard of locking? And I think a more appropriate question is, what is he doing here?"

"Ah…extra curriculum fun?"

"Err…hi Hermione" Seamus said awkwardly "I'll just be going now…nice catching up Ginny'

"Don't be afraid to call stranger"

After Seamus had left the room, Hermione fixed Ginny with the most venomous glare she could.

"Ahem"

"Ok, I'm not proud of that one…but I was horny!"

Another fabulous anecdote from Ginny Weasley.

"Gin, learn to lock the door, please god, for the sake of all mankind"

"Honey, if a man walked in here, he wouldn't want to shield his eyes"

"Well notify me once I get my sex change"

"You as a man…that could work…"

"Ginny!"

"Jokes, jokes! Now, what is that you need?"

"I have a problem"

"You have a problem? You're shacking up with Draco Malfoy! You don't have a problem at all!"

"But that's just the problem…I got into some…situations…"

"You lost your virginity didn't you…thank you Circe…I thought the day would never come…I was starting to think it would grow so thick a guy couldn't break though – "

"Ginny, I haven't done that yet. And most definitely not with him!"

"Then what? Is Ron hitting on you again? Cause I will castrate him if he touches you again…"

"No, Ron's fine. It's just…we were…I was…shower and he…and we…and tongue…hands…everywhere…"

"For the smartest witch of the age, you really need to learn how to form proper sentences. Now, let's try it again Hermione. Small words, less thoughts"

"Ok, I was in the shower, and he came in, and I didn't realise he had. So, he slipped into the shower and we started uh…you know…"

"No, I don't"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about!"

"Of course I do, but I have such a hard time trying to get you to say penis! I want you to…broaden your vocabulary"

"Argh! Anyway, we started…kissing, and he uh…felt me up…and then he…gave me head, kind of. I think. There was a tongue, that classifies as head right?"

"Or oral sex, or blowjob, drinking from the furry mug, carpet munching…"

"Don't get carried away Gin"

"But he gave you head! This is…hallelujah! Was he good? Eh, eh?"

"Take a wild stab in the dark" Hermione said sardonically.

"Wow. Good for you! But wait…where does the problem come in?"

"We were about to do it…"

"And?"

"And well…we…I…uh…"

Hermione then mumbled some incoherent words under her breath that Ginny couldn't understand.

"I'm sorry, but would you like to enunciate your words properly this time? I don't have my hearing aid today"

"I walked out"

"Excuse me?"

"I WALKED OUT ON HIM!" Hermione screamed at the top of her voice.

"Trust me, I heard you the first time. It was the believe part that didn't really sink in. So you walked out on him did you? Haven't you learnt a thing from my past teachings? And babblings about penis'? Young apprentice…you have much to learn"

They were silent for a while, Hermione out of embarrassment and Ginny out of initial shock.

"YOU TURNED DOWN THE SLYTHERIN SEX GOD! WHAT IN MERLIN'S GOOD NAME IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

"Louder Gin, I don't think they heard you in URUGUAY!"

"Sorry, I'm sorry! It's just…he was…and you…shower…and…you…you…dunderhead!"

"I know I know…I don't know why I did it! Ginny, what should I do now? What can I do now? Help me Ginny, help me!"

"Don't worry, I have a plan"

"Oh god, the impish grin…it's the apocalypse"

"Ok, here's what you have to do"

OoOoOoOoO

Hermione and Ginny then spent the rest of the evening in Ginny's room, in deep conversation. Plotting the way Hermione was going to ("Try" Ginny added in) seduce Draco Malfoy. And…succeed. By the end of the evening, there was a list of things that Hermione must accomplish by the end of the month. But the main objective of her mission: lure him in and push him away until he totally caves in with wanting and desire!

OoOoOoOoO

On the other side of the castle, there were also two ("Beautiful" another anecdote by Ginny) young men discussing two very lovely Gryffindor queens.

A/N: You know the drill!