A/N: Sorry we've taken so long to update our stories! Busy busy busy... :P

Disclaimer
Ainsley: Umm... Hi?
Eowyn: -sigh- Elven Bunny and Butterfly Lion do not own me, Lord of the Rings, the Silmarillion, Morgoth's Ring, Lost Tales 1 & 2, etc.
Ainsley: Instead they own... ME!

Chapter Five

"Time for more sword practice," sighed Eowyn. "Here's a block."

"Like this?" asked Ainsley. Eowyn tilted the sword up and to the right. "Right... there. Now you get to practice that! Won't that be fun!"

"Terribly," Ainsley muttered.

"Here's a slash... a stroke, a lunge, and finally, here's a swipe. Now you get to build up your arms by holding out your sword, lifting it a little each day," Eowyn instructed. Ainsley sighed. "Whoo."

"I'm hungry," Ainsley announced. "What time do you eat?"

Eowyn shrugged. "About now. Let's go."

The two girls headed toward a large tavern with a sign that said 'The Laughing Grasshopper' in large black letters.

"What a lovely name," commented Ainsley.

"Isn't it?" replied Eowyn.

"Do you have any money?"

"Yes."

"Oh. Good."

"You don't, I take it?"

"All the money I have is at home, and I don't know where home is. Anyway, it wouldn't be accepted here. It's paper."

Eowyn looked at Ainsley quizzically. "What's the use of paper money?"

Ainsley shrugged. "I'll explain later. It's rather complicated."

Eowyn pushed open the door. "Be careful of the step, it's a little steep-"

FWUMP.

(That's the sound Ainsley made when she tripped.)

Eowyn sighed and pulled her upright. "Good job, Ainsley."

Ainsley rubbed her forehead. "Ouch. That hurt."

Eowyn grinned and pulled her to a table in the corner. "You really need to take some lessons for that. Something like a lady's course."

Ainsley sighed wistfully. "I tried once. The lady ran away screaming after five minutes."

Eowyn stared at her. Her eyebrow twitched.

"Well, strictly speaking that isn't true. What happened is that I destroyed a treasured heirloom of her family- a dictionary from the 1800s," Ainsley corrected. "You probably have had to walk with a big book on your head- Hey, you don't have 1800s here. Hmm.
"Anyway, after she got over that, it was tea time. Well, you see, she had this little dog. It was cute. I fed it some of my sandwich, and then when it was time to drink our tea, it jumped up on the table and destroyed three china cups.
"And then, after that, we had to learn how to cook. Me + cooking disaster. The dog escaped the room that she had put it in and knocked over the flour. I accidently dropped the milk, and it mixed. The other girls started panicking, and, well..."

"I get the idea," Eowyn intercepted.

Ainsley flashed a smile at her. "Good."

"So, whatcha want?"

"Huh?" asked Ainsley. She turned around.

Evidentally one of the serving ... servants had come to ask what they wanted. That would make sense, as he (for it was a boy of about nine) had asked 'So, whatcha want?'.

"Oh! Lady Eowyn! I didn't see you!" said the boy, startled. He bowed.

"Hello, Anlaf," greeted Eowyn. "I see you've found yourself a job."

"It pays pretty well," said Anlaf, looking at Eowyn with a sort of adoring puppy look.

Ainsley hid a grin behind her hand.

"What do you want to eat, Ainsley?" Eowyn asked.

"Oh, I don't care, so long as it's food," Ainsley replied. She had no idea what people ate in this place-time-whatever.

Eowyn said something to Anlaf, who bowed again and dashed off towards the kitchens.

"Cute little boy," Ainsley commented.

"Yes," said Eowyn, "But don't let him hear you say that. Little boys hate being called cute. It drove my brother crazy when we were young."

"Maybe he's still crazy," Ainsley mused.

"I wouldn't doubt it," Eowyn answered, grinning.

Anlaf came trotting back with the food, and after yet another bow and an adoring glance at Eowyn, ran off to another table.

Eowyn picked up a wooden bowl filled with stew and handed it to Ainsley. "Here, let this take the edge off your hunger."

Ainsley sampled it gingerly, and her face lit up. "It's good! What is it?"

"Oh, this and that; vegetables, some mutton, I don't know," Eowyn made a dismissive gesture.

A group of laughing people came in the door, and Ainsley froze as she heard a familiar voice. "It's him! Hide me!"

Eowyn looked at her quizzically. "What are you talking about?"

"Eomer! Your brother! He hates me!"

"He doesn't hate you," laughed Eowyn. Ainsley glared at her. "Well then, he wishes me great bodily harm."

Ainsley's eyes widened as the said Eorlinga came in their direction, and she ducked under the table.

"Where is that sheep-jumping wench?" she heard him snap.

"Eomer! Your language!" Eowyn was horrified. "And besides, I was sheep-jumping too."

Under the table, Ainsley was struggling with herself. She wanted to pinch his leg-HARD.

"Well, where is she?" Eomer persisted.

"She's...not here right now," Eowyn replied. Ainsley sighed in relief. She decided not to pinch him after all.

Eomer also sighed in relief. "Well, why is there another bowl here?"

His sister grinned innocently at him. "Oh, I was expecting you."

Eomer pulled up a chair and started eating.

"Hey, not cool," whimpered Ainsley mentally. "It's MY stew!"

"So, Eomer," she heard Eowyn say, "Why is it you hate Ainsley so much anyway?"

"Oh, so that's her name," muttered Eomer. "Creepy little wench."

"Eomer."

"Sorry. But she grates on me!"

"You've known her, what, an hour?"

"I don't like her. She's evil. I bet she was born in Mordor."

"Eomer, don't be ridiculous. She's never been outside of Rohan-that is, in Middle-Earth."

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"She's not from Middle-Earth," Eowyn explained.

Eomer's eyes lit up. "Oh, that explains it! Maybe she's not human at all! Maybe she's a demon!"

Ainsley, meanwhile, was still sitting under the table, chanting "My stew! My stew! My stew!"

"Eomer!" the Lady of Rohan scolded. "She is quite human, I assure you! I don't know what's the matter with you!"

"What's the matter with me? There's nothing the matter with me! But I know absolutely and for sure there is something the matter with that "Ainsley" character!"

"Ooh, that does it," thought Ainsley. "He's going to pay. My stew..."

Suddenly, she sprung up and out from under the table.

"Something the matter with me? Something the matter with me! I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH ME! YOU'RE EATING MY STEW!" she screamed, grabbing the bowl and running with it.

Unfortunately, it was a little more full than she had thought, and it spilled on the floor as she ran, Eomer pursuing her.

Ainsley dashed out of the door and into a nearby stable. She clutched the bowl of stew to her chest, sloshing it all over herself.

Eomer slipped along behind her, barely able to retain his footing on the slick stew that was being dribbled along the ground.

"I didn't take track for nothing," Ainsley told herself as she dodged under the flailing hooves of a rearing horse.

Eowyn sipped her stew contemplatively, listening to the banter of Eomer's friends.

"Hey, Aldwulf, do you think he'll catch her?"

"I'lll bet you a mug of ale she eludes him, Beornhelm."

"You're on!"

Eowyn smiled as a familiar person approached her.

"Anyone sitting here?"

"Not at the moment, Theodred."

Theodred wiped some spilled stew off the chair and sat down. "So, cousin, what's going on?"

Eowyn gestured breezily. "Oh, Eomer's chasing a friend of mine."

Ainsley shrieked as she came up against the stable wall. She whirled around to see Eomer approaching her swiftly.

He grabbed her arm and time held still.