Chapter 49: Scars
Shepard heard her own voice calling out, panicked and full of fear; even before fully conscious. "Garrus!" She struggled to pull her eyes open, but they felt heavy, and her muscles weak when she tried to sit up.
"Rest, siha." Gentle hands urged her back down. "Rest. I will find him."
Something as cold as ice flushed through her veins, hitting her like a wrecking ball, knocking her out completely.
Her eyes shot open. Garrus. She tried to push herself up from the bed, but found her wrists, waist, and ankles restrained. She needed to get to Garrus. A machine next to her bed beeped out a staggered rhythm, growing in tempo as she struggled against the restraints.
Dr. Chakwas appeared at her side, slipping a syringe into her IV port. Worry etched deep lines into the doctor's face. "I'm sorry, you can't be awake yet."
"Where's Garrus?" Shepard asked, her voice croaking through her parched throat, but the sedatives hit her, dragging her under before she got her answer.
Her eyelids fluttered, a dense fog surrounding her mind. Blinking, she tried to clear the haze from her eyes. Her gaze found Kasumi, sleeping soundly on the bed across from hers. Garrus. Dr. Chakwas sat at her desk, back to Shepard. Where was Garrus?
She licked her lips, trying to work up moisture. "Is EDI back online?"
Dr. Chakwas turned, glancing over her shoulder at Shepard before pushing the chair away from the desk.
Shepard wanted to sit up, but one glance at her waist reminded her of the restraints holding her to the bed. "Have we heard anything from the ground teams? Where's Garrus?"
Dr. Chakwas frowned, crossing the floor to Shepard's side, stopping to look at the readouts from the machines. "You're burning through the sedatives far too fast." She picked up a vial from the bedside table and filled a syringe. "I'm sorry, Commander, I can't let you stay awake yet. EDI is back online, but they haven't been able to reestablish contact with the ground teams. However," Dr. Chakwas said, slipping the syringe into Shepard's IV port, "EDI was able to recall one of the shuttles, and Thane insisted a team go down to look for them; himself included." She pressed the plunger on the syringe. "He said he knew you wouldn't rest until you know Garrus is safe. He must really love you …." The sedatives took hold, stealing the last of Dr. Chakwas' words and flinging them out into space.
A steady beeping pulled Shepard back to consciousness. Laying on her side, the familiar, warm weight of Garrus' arm rested over her hip. Garrus. She opened her eyes, turning her head to try to look at him, but his arm shifted, fingers tucking in under her stomach, and he nuzzled against the back of her head.
"Shh. Go back to sleep. It's alright, I'm here." His breath, warm and soft brushed over her neck.
She let out a strangled sob, tears filling her eyes. "Oh gods, I thought I lost you." The pace of the monitor next to her started to pick up.
Noise from across the room drew her attention, and she saw Dr. Chakwas making her way over. Kasumi still slept in the other bed, James slouched in a chair between the beds, head lolling forward in sleep.
"I'm here, Dawn. I'm safe. Everyone's safe." Garrus' mouth and mandibles pressed against her neck, a low thrum vibrating against her skin as he hummed.
Dr. Chakwas offered her a soft smile. "Do you think you want to try sitting up? Maybe use the restroom and eat something?" Her gaze shifted to behind Shepard, her expression changing to the stern, motherly look the doctor perfected ages ago. "Not you. You stay put."
Brow knitting in confusion, Shepard tried again to turn enough to see the turian behind her, panic sweeping through her as she realized he must be injured. "You're hurt? What happened?" The beeps from the machine picked up again, earning her a soft tut from the doctor.
"I'm fine, it's nothing to worry about." He pressed into the back of her head, adjusting his grip on her once more.
"You are not fine!" Dr. Chakwas' exasperated tone drew Shepard's attention back to her. She glared at Garrus, her hands on her hips. "I swear between the two of you." The doctor sucked in a deep breath and blew it back out in a rush, shaking her head. She turned her gaze back to Shepard. "But he's right, you don't need to be worried about him right now, Commander. You need to be worried about yourself." She glanced toward the door. "EDI? Is there someone awake who can escort Shepard to the restrooms? Someone uninjured?"
Shepard leaned into him, stroking the arm keeping her pinned, preventing her from getting a look at him. "Garrus, what happened?"
"Samara is awake, Dr. Chakwas," EDI said, the volume of her voice lower than usual. "Should I ask her to come to the med bay?"
Dr. Chakwas nodded at the AI. "Yes, EDI, please."
Garrus hummed softly in her ear. "I was hit with some of the electrical fluid from the reservoir in the Broker's office. Jack, hmmm, Jack was too close. I needed to get her out of the way."
Shepard swallowed, glancing back at the beeping machines and taking a deep breath, trying to calm her racing heart. The beeping eased up and she licked her lips, turning her attention to Dr. Chakwas. "How bad?"
The doctor's gaze shifted back and forth between the two of them, and Garrus nodded his head against Shepard's. Dr. Chakwas frowned before filling Shepard in. "His heart stopped, but thankfully Miranda knows enough about turian physiology to get it started again. He's experiencing some arrhythmia, which may still resolve, but it is absolutely necessary he remain on bedrest for a few days while I continue to monitor the situation."
Garrus grumbled, clearly no more enthused with the idea of staying in the med bay than Shepard ever was, despite the hard time he always gave her about heeding the doctor's advice.
Dr. Chakwas clasped her hands together. "He's suffering mild neurological damage which may or may not be permanent; it's too soon to tell. The thulium in his carapace helped to discharge some of the electricity, quite likely saving him from more serious internal injuries, but burned the tissues beneath and surrounding his plates. His scalp, neck, arms, and much of his torso are covered in Lichtenberg scars where plates haven't formed." Her scowl deepened. "He refused treatment until I let him see you, and finagled his way into sharing a bed with you once he learned it wouldn't further upset your condition. I had other patients to tend to, so it wasn't worth the battle to deny him if it meant getting him taken care of so I could treat the others."
"She needed me." He chuffed, adjusting his grip around Shepard's waist. "I'll be fine, and I don't care about the scars."
"With all due respect, Garrus, you're on a enough painkillers at the moment," Dr. Chakwas said, expression shifting to a smirk, "I highly doubt you're fully grasping the seriousness of your situation."
Shepard closed her eyes and sucked in a deep breath. The whole thing went to shit, Garrus—and she didn't even know who all else—getting hurt, standing in for her on a mission she was too fucked up to lead herself. His heart stopped, for crying out loud, and she was stuck in a bed because the voices in her head were killing her. Because … because she'd killed some of the voices in her head. Guilt washed over her; for everything. For Garrus and the others on her team sporting fresh injuries because of her, for Anderson, and for those she sacrificed to take out Vasir—she didn't even know their names.
"Abby, Clayton, and Quinn." Cold, seething anger seeped from Jane. "Their names were Abby, Clayton, and Quinn and you killed them."
She heard the med bay door slide open, and the soft sound of Samara's footsteps.
"Samara, would you please help the commander to the restroom? I need to stay in here to continue to monitor Garrus and Kasumi," Dr. Chakwas said.
"Of course." Samara's gentle voice preceded more quiet steps closer.
Shepard opened her eyes to see both women looking down at her. Working an arm under herself, she tried to push up but found, much to her dismay, she didn't have the strength and her arm gave out. She let out a self-pity filled sigh when Dr. Chakwas slipped a hand under her, helping to pull her upright. The room spun around her, but they managed to get her up and the blanket off, legs hanging over the edge of the bed. Samara held her steady while the doctor unhooked her IV.
As soon as they got her on her feet, her legs buckled, but she caught herself, locking her knees in place. Samara wrapped an arm around her waist, and she turned to look at Garrus. His gaze wavered, eyelids drooping as his mandibles fluttered softly. White, circular monitoring pads stood out against his temples, small wires trailing away from them to join up with others coming from somewhere behind him; she thought the back of his head. She could tell either exhaustion or the painkillers pulled at him, maybe both. Somehow, Dr. Chakwas managed to convince him to wear a gown, and more wires trailed out of the neck of the thin material, leading off to a monitor behind him.
He lifted an arm, reaching out to her, and she took his hand, catching sight of the lightning bolt pattern arching over his neck in an angry blue. The hide around his jaw stood out in a swollen outline, tracing the curve of his plates. Tears bit at her eyes again, and she blinked them away before they took hold and pulled even more out to spill down her cheeks. He frowned, rubbing his thumb across the back of her hand, the exposed talon gently scraping her skin.
"We can't have you out of bed for long." Dr. Chakwas pressed a hand between Shepard's shoulder blades. "So long as you both cooperate and continue to improve, I'll let you keep sharing a bed. Go on, go use the restroom. I'll have something for you to eat brought in." She pushed a little, urging Shepard away from the bed.
Garrus' hand slipped away from hers, and she turned, letting Samara lead her away. By the time they reached the med bay door, she felt a little more steady on her feet, but still nowhere near enough to tell Samara to let her go. Tentative step after tentative step, she made her way to the crew deck restroom and into a stall. Samara held onto her while she fought to get the gown tugged up and her panties pulled down. Once Shepard was sitting, Samara stepped outside of the stall, pulling the door mostly closed behind her.
Propping her elbows on her knees, Shepard rested her forehead against her palms, shoving her fingers into her hair while she willed her bladder to let go. "EDI?"
"Yes, Shepard?" EDI's voice echoed in the bathroom.
"Where are we?" Shepard dug her fingertips into her scalp, trying to massage away the budding tension.
"We will arrive on Illium in two hours and thirty-two minutes. Miranda has given orders for the Normandy to dock for repairs."
She sighed, Illium wasn't ideal but better than Omega and closer, too—less relay jumping involved, less risk of more damage to the ship. Still, going to the Citadel would've been so much better, but it was out of the question while the Council wanted her for treason. "Did we take the Broker out?"
"Yes, Shepard. Grundan Krul is now in place as the Shadow Broker."
Shepard grunted, straightening to pull some toilet paper free from the holder. "Who, besides Garrus and Kasumi, are injured?"
"From the ground teams: Miranda sustained non-life threatening gunshot wounds. Her wounds were primarily tended to on the field, and she refused further medical assistance with the insistence Dr. Chakwas time was better spent tending to those in worse condition. Grunt sustained severe, blunt-force trauma and lacerations, but his redundant systems remain undamaged and he is healing at a rate appropriate for his species. Dr. Chakwas has allowed him to remain in port cargo, but has asked that I monitor his progress. Jack sustained mild contusions and lacerations; she has refused any form of treatment, but did eventually allow Dr. Chakwas to take scans to ensure she sustained no fractures."
Shepard cleaned herself up and rapped her knuckles on the side of the stall. Samara stepped back inside to help her up while EDI continued to talk.
"From the attack on the Normandy: Zaeed, Jacob, Mess Sergeant Gardner, Engineer Daniels, and Crewman Anders have all sustained non-life threatening gunshot wounds. Jeff sustained multiple microfractures during the explosions. Their injuries have all been tended to. Crewman Goldstein and Crewman Rolston sustained fatal gunshot wounds; they are deceased."
Jane scoffed, tacking new names onto the body count. "And Abby, Clayton, and Quinn."
"I'm sorry." Shepard thought, swallowing back a fresh wave of grief as she left the stall.
"Thank you, EDI." She leaned against the sink, washing her hands. "Do you know if they located the agent named Feron?"
"I do not. Would you like for me to make inquiries of the ground team?"
Shepard shook her head. "No, let them rest. I'll find out later. That's all."
"Logging you out, Shepard."
She glanced at Samara as the Justicar wrapped an arm back around her waist. Snorting, she gave the asari a light shake of her head. "Thanks, Samara. I know your oath didn't exactly cover this kind of thing."
"No," Samara said with a smile, leading her from the restroom, "but I believe our friendship does."
She chuckled before it shifted to a groan.
"Are you in pain?" Samara stopped walking, turning her full attention to Shepard.
She took a deep breath and shook her head. It wasn't really a lie, she had some mild aches and pains, but they were nothing she couldn't walk into battle with if not for feeling so weak. "No … I'm just—I'm making such a mess out of everything." She let out a heavy sigh. "Some days, I'm not so sure if I can keep going."
"I do not believe that to be truth, Commander." Samara started walking again, guiding them back towards the med bay. "We are all given things in our lives that are difficult to deal with, you perhaps more than most. In my short time with you, I have seen you continue to fight when all others would have given up, and you deal with your difficulties both with honor and grace. I believe you will continue to do so; it is who you are."
Shepard smiled up at the asari. "Thanks, Samara. It's nice to hear, and I hope you're right."
The med bay door slid open, and Dr. Chakwas joined them, helping to navigate Shepard back to the bed. Garrus dozed, snoring softly, until she sat down on the edge. His hand wrapped around her hip as the doctor flushed her IV with saline, hooking it back up to the drip. Dr. Chakwas brought Shepard more pillows to prop herself up with instead of adjusting the bed and further disturbing Garrus. Once Shepard settled, the doctor pulled the table over, uncovering a tray with crackers and diced fruit before setting a glass of water down in front of her.
Dr. Chakwas smiled at her when she sipped from the glass. "Take it slowly, you might not feel like eating much just yet, and it's okay if you don't."
She nodded, setting the glass down, and Dr. Chakwas returned to her desk. Picking up a cracker to nibble on, Shepard turned her head to look at Garrus when he rumbled beside her. His eyelids still drooped, and she could tell he needed sleep, but he seemed determined to keep his eye on her.
He shifted a little, wincing, before resting his hand on her thigh. "Your turn."
"For?" She raised an eyebrow.
Raising a brow plate in challenge, he flicked a mandible. "Telling me why you're being half carried to the bathroom while wearing a hospital gown."
She took a deep breath and then another drink of water. Glancing over, she saw Kasumi and James both still seemed to be asleep, but decided to lower her voice anyway as she turned her attention back to Garrus. She wasn't ready to share the latest development with the entire crew. "I collapsed after fighting to defend the ship. Doc says my brain's becoming more and more active, now it's too active, and it's wearing down my body despite the implants working to keep me going." She lifted a shoulder, trying to brush aside the alarm she saw in his drug-glazed eyes. "It's why I asked you to lead the Shadow Broker mission. I didn't want to tell you everything before you went down, didn't want you worrying on the field."
Garrus hummed, his brow plates dipping. "What's causing it?"
She turned her attention to the plate in front of her, taking her time eating a couple of pieces of fruit. She felt his gaze on her, but he didn't say anything while she worked through her thoughts. "When I woke up from the coma … I somehow pulled in some of the other Shepards, merging them with me in some way different than what Jane and the rest are. I think I sort of used them to get the strength to wake up or something. It didn't really seem to affect me other than a few memories and emotions here and there, so I stopped worrying about it once Jane woke up and told me what happened. But when Dr. Chakwas told me earlier about this new thing, I started thinking it's probably related." Her gaze drifted back to him, running over the blue scars, wondering if they'd fade. "I haven't had the chance to ask her if she thinks the same thing, but …."
He flared his mandibles, pulling in her scent. "But?"
She took a deep breath. "But when the Normandy came under attack, I went down to defend the hangar. The asari spectre I talked to you about before? Tela Vasir?" She paused until he nodded. "She boarded the ship along with other Shadow Broker agents. Thane and Samara helped clear the area, but in the end I was left to fight Vasir on my own while they got Kasumi to the med bay. She would've died if they didn't follow my orders to get her out of there."
His mandibles pulled in against his jaw, but he didn't speak, just watched her.
"Vasir's strong and fast. She went over my files and knew what skills I have. Knew what to expect from me. She was wearing me down. I'm not sure how, but I absorbed a few more Shepards, and used their biotic skills—things I've never done before—to win the fight."
His brow plates crept up, his eyes opening a little wider. "Like what?"
"Lash, Slam, and Nova." The corners of her mouth turned down as it occurred to her that she very well may still have access to those skills. "After I knocked her back through the breech in the hangar, I came up here to help clear the third deck. They'd shot Gardner, so when Cerberus crew reinforcements arrived to help finish off the stragglers, I helped him to the med bay. Doc told me to sit down, so I did, and a few seconds later I was kissing the floor."
He hummed. "Finish eating so you can lay back down."
Shepard blinked and arched a brow. "That's it?"
"For now. We'll talk about it more when we're both back on our feet." He rubbed his hand back and forth along her leg. "Right now, I just want to focus on getting us there, alright?"
She nodded. "Alright." Turning her attention back to her plate, she ate a few more pieces of fruit and a couple more crackers before she just wanted to lay back down and close her eyes. She took a drink of water and covered the tray. "Doc?"
Dr. Chakwas glanced at Shepard over her shoulder before leaving her desk. She lifted the lid on the tray and peeked inside before closing it again and nodding. She pulled the table away and helped Shepard readjust the pillows. "I'm going to give you another sedative. We've brought your brain activity levels back down some, but the more rest we can get you right now, the better."
Shepard nodded, laying on her side, trying to leave a little space between herself and Garrus for his sake, but he only pulled her closer.
"Garrus, I'm going to give you another dose of your pain medication in just a moment." Dr. Chakwas glanced between the two of them. "Mordin will be relieving me soon, do try not to give him a reason to have to wake me up, won't you?" She slid a syringe into Shepard's IV port before patting her on the shoulder. "And stay in bed, the both of you."
She awoke to the rich, baritone sound of James' laughter. She felt Garrus, a solid, warm wall at her back, his steady breathing brushing across her neck, and it brought a smile to her face. Opening her eyes, she found James sitting in the same spot as the last time she looked. Awake and holding Kasumi's hand, he leaned over the thief's bed, his back to Shepard. Dr. Chakwas was nowhere to be seen.
"James." Her voice croaked and she licked her lips before trying again. "James."
The marine turned, a smile light on his face when he met her gaze. "Hey! Ídolo, you're up!"
She snorted, feeling Garrus stir a little behind her before falling into a light snore, and she pointed at the glass on the table just out of her reach before letting her hand drop and hang over the edge of the bed. James patted Kasumi's hand before standing up and moving to Shepard's side.
He filled the glass with fresh water from the pitcher and held it out to her. "Do you need help with it?" Low and soft, his voice filled with concern.
She shook her head, lifting up on her elbow just enough to elevate her head and took the cup from him, taking a long, slow drink before handing it back to him. "Where's the doctor?"
"Making her rounds." He glanced toward the door as if he expected Dr. Chakwas might walk in at any moment. "I'm supposed to call Miranda if you guys need anything. Want me to have EDI call her?"
She nodded, the pillowcase feeling rough against her cheek. "Yeah, I need to pee. But try not to wake Garrus."
"I've notified Miranda for you, Shepard." EDI's voice came over the speaker, the volume still lowered.
"Thanks, EDI." Shepard waved James away. "Go, be with her," she said, pointing at Kasumi, "and thanks for the water."
"No hay problema, Ídolo." He patted her shoulder before moving back to his chair and taking up Kasumi's hand again.
Kasumi grinned at Shepard, waving. She smiled and returned the gesture, happy to see the thief alert and cheerful. A moment later, Miranda came into the med bay and stopped next to her side of the bed. After checking the monitor readouts and scanning her, Miranda nodded to herself and unhooked the IV before holding a hand out to help Shepard out of the bed. Carefully sliding Garrus' arm aside, she took Miranda's hand and pulled herself upright. Relieved to see the room didn't spin, and holding her own head up didn't feel like a chore, she dropped her feet on the floor and stood. Miranda put a steadying hand on her arm and raised an inquisitive eyebrow.
"It's not so bad, better than last time for sure." Shepard started moving forward, pleased to see walking wasn't too hard, either.
Her steps were steady enough Miranda let go of her arm, content to just walk alongside her as they made their way from the med bay and to the crew bathrooms. It thrilled Shepard to be able to actually close the stall door all the way behind her. "What can you tell me?" she asked, settling down on the toilet.
"About your condition?"
"My condition. Everyone's condition. The Normandy's condition." She waved her hand even though the other woman couldn't see her. "The mission, any of it."
"Very well. The sedation has significantly decreased your level of brain activity, but it is still abnormally high comparatively." Miranda hesitated as if considering her next words carefully. "I'm reviewing my Lazarus Project files, I might be able to make some adjustments to your implants to help. In the meantime, I support Dr. Chakwas' recommendations."
Shepard snorted lightly and shook her head as she stood, pulling her panties back up. She had a feeling by 'adjustments' to her implants, Miranda really meant 'additional' implants. "I've got a theory."
"Go on." Curiosity warred with amusement in the operative's voice.
"Whatever I did to the others when I woke up from the coma—and then again on a smaller scale while fighting Vasir—is causing the brain activity issue." She opened the door, moving past Miranda to the sink. "I have their memories now. I can access then just as easily as my own experiences—unfiltered through Jane—and I used biotic skills I haven't been trained for. If you think you can do something with that, an implant or whatever, do it. I need to be able to be on the field with my team." She glanced up, looking at Miranda in the mirror.
Miranda had her omni-tool open, taking notes while Shepard spoke. "You very well may be right, if your brain is attempting to accommodate new information from multiple sources …. I'll have to look into some things." She closed her omni-tool and met Shepard's gaze in the mirror, picking up where she left off on her debrief. "Everyone else is recovering from their injuries without complications. Garrus and Kasumi still require around the clock monitoring in the med bay, but I suspect Dr. Chakwas will release you today."
Shepard dried her hands and they left the restroom, heading back to the med bay.
"We are docked on Illium, and repairs to the Normandy are in progress. The Shadow Broker already made arrangements for our docking fees and repairs by the time we arrived. So, obviously, Grundan Krul has been able to successfully integrate himself into the new role—so far, at least. Resistance aboard the Broker's vessel was stronger than anticipated, clearly they expected an attack."
They stopped just outside the med bay door while Miranda finished.
"That being said, the mission was a success and we sustained no ground casualties. The drell you mentioned, Feron, was aboard the ship, but he claimed to have locked himself in a room and didn't engage in the fight when he learned who exactly was attacking." Putting one hand on her hip, she waved the other at nothing in particular. "I didn't have the opportunity to speak with him directly, I needed to tend to Garrus, but it is my understanding he's agreed to stay on and work with Grundan Krul." She started walking again, the med bay door sliding open for them.
"Shepard?" Garrus turned his head toward the noise, mandibles flared and voice dripping with worry.
"I'm here." Shepard kept moving, making her way back to the bed.
As soon as she stepped into his line of sight, he relaxed, following her movements with his gaze. "You look better."
She smiled at him, climbing back up on the bed next to him. "Mmm. You don't."
He chuffed, humor dancing in his eyes. She laid down on her back so she could see him while Miranda reestablished her IV.
"I'll have Gardner send someone in with something to eat for the both of you." Miranda took a step back when she finished with the IV. "Dr. Chakwas should be about done with her rounds, but if you need anything else, call me."
Shepard nodded. "Thanks, Miranda."
"Of course." She flashed Shepard a smile before turning, her boots clacking against the floor as she walked out of the med bay.
Shepard fixed her gaze on Garrus, taking in the dark burns edging his plates and sighed. "How are you feeling?"
He hummed and leaned over to kiss her before pressing his forehead against hers. "Better now that you're back." He draped his arm across her stomach, tucking his hand in around her waist.
She smiled, adjusting her IV line so she could reach across and run her fingertips over his mandible. "Miranda said she thinks the doc will let me out today, but I won't go far, I promise. Not while you're still in here. I'll stay right here with you, if you want."
Mandibles flaring, he lifted a brow plate. "If I'd known getting hurt myself was the answer to getting you to listen to the doctors—"
"Shush." She pushed her fingers to his mouth plates. "Don't you dare finish that sentence, Vakarian."
He chuffed, his breath rushing over her hand before he nipped at her fingertips. "I'm just saying I'm glad you're getting the rest you need."
"Uh huh," she said, rolling her eyes.
"How is …" He cleared his throat, his mandibles fluttering lightly before falling still. "How is Jane?"
Shepard arched an eyebrow, if he asked about Jane's well-being, maybe he was worse off than she realized. Or maybe, she thought, he hoped Jane was one of those she'd absorbed. "She's angry with me, but she's alright otherwise. Still there, if that's what you're asking."
"Is she, hmmm." He hesitated, his mandibles flaring before falling slack. "Is she willing to talk—to me?"
Shepard's eyebrows shot up higher, lips parting, but she found herself speechless.
"Always." Jane sounded hesitant, yet hopeful, the anger seeping from her shifting to wistful longing.
"She says 'always.'" Shepard brushed her thumb over his mandible, offering him a soft smile before settling her hand down on her stomach.
He watched her for a moment, holding her gaze, seeming to be searching her eyes for something. Mandibles flaring again, he seemed to steel himself and cleared his throat. "I'm not sure about this Feron. I know everything is different this time, but he's still the same person, right? Do you trust him?"
"Honestly, I never really knew him well enough to say I trust him, but for what it's worth, Liara did." Jane said, and Shepard gave herself over to playing mouthpiece. "By the time I met him, he'd spent two years strapped into a torture chair, that'd change anyone. I doubt he's much like the Feron I knew at all, if he didn't have to endure the Broker's punishment."
"Hmmm, but Liara knew him before the torture."
"She hired him to help her find our body. When they found out the Shadow Broker planned to give us to the collectors, Feron confessed working for the Shadow Broker with orders to lead Liara away from us, but he had a change of heart and helped her instead. Which is why, when he got captured while covering Liara's escape with our body, the Shadow Broker decided to punish him." Jane hummed a little, and Shepard felt herself doing the same. "Liara cared about him enough to devote herself to avenging—what she feared to be—his death. When she took over as the Shadow Broker, he stayed there with her for quite awhile before returning to the field as her agent."
The med bay door hissed open, and Shepard glanced over Garrus' shoulder, spotting Kelly entering, carrying two trays. Garrus turned his head, and she caught a pained wince before he hid it, forcing his face still.
He turned back to her, his mandibles pulling in at the sides of his face. "We can talk more later."
"Sure."
Shepard pushed herself upright. "Do you want to sit up with pillows, or should I raise the bed? Which would be more comfortable?"
He hummed, brow plate twitching while he considered his options. "Raise the bed." He tried to roll over to his back, but froze, hissing, his eyes squeezed closed.
"Vega, give us a hand." Shepard all but barked at the marine.
James jumped to his feet, rushing around the bed to Garrus' side. "Woah, take it easy, Plates. I got you."
Garrus chuffed before heaving a heavy sigh of resignation, letting James shift him over to his back, but still he hissed and groaned. "You've got to come up with a better name for me than 'Plates.'"
James grinned. "I can always call you Scars."
Shepard chuckled before whispering just loud enough for the two men to hear, "It's what you've always called him before."
"Yeah?" James raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah, I'll tell you about it another time," she said, nodding a little towards the waiting yeoman a few feet away. "Raise the bed up for us?"
"You got it, Ídolo." James moved back to her side of the bed and pushed the button on the railing.
She tried to help steady Garrus as the top of the bed shifted up, clenching her jaw when his mandibles snapped tight against the sides of his face. His eyes widened, and he held his breath until the movement stopped again, letting it back out in a slow, deflated groan.
She frowned at him. "You should've asked Miranda to give you more painkillers."
He glanced at her before adjusting the blankets over his lap. "I'm fine."
"No you're not." She shook her head.
"No," he said, his mandibles fluttering, "I'm not. But I'm tired of sleeping, and I can't eat if I'm asleep."
Kelly sat the trays down on Dr. Chakwas' desk before pulling the rolling tables over in front of the two of them. "The Illusive Man is asking to speak with you, but I informed him you're on bedrest." She turned back to the desk, but James already picked the trays up for her, carrying them over. Kelly lifted the lid on one before pointing to Shepard's table, and took the other one from him to set down in front of Garrus. "I'm told the repairs on the Normandy will be done by tomorrow evening, at the latest."
"Thanks, Kelly." Shepard offered her a warm smile, noting the hint of sadness in Kelly's tone. "How are you holding up?"
Kelly gave her a gloomy smile and lifted her shoulders. "Grief is a tricky thing, Commander. The loss of two of our crew has left me feeling vulnerable, and at an emotional loss. I know what I'm feeling is perfectly normal, though, and in time, it'll ease." Her eyebrows shot up a little and she held out a hand. "Still, I am perfectly capable of performing my duties, and you shouldn't hesitate at all if you need to talk to me about anything."
Shepard fought back a chuckle, amused by the yeoman's eagerness to put everyone else before herself, and nodded. "I'll keep that in mind."
Kelly seemed to relax a little. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"
Shaking her head, Shepard said, "I don't think so, not right now at least. Thanks for the update."
"It's my pleasure. I'll leave you two to eat." Kelly turned and made her way to the door, stopping to look back over her shoulder. "If you need anything, just have EDI let me know." She left when Shepard nodded.
Dr. Chakwas returned a while later, nodding her approval when she saw Garrus and Shepard eating. When they were done, James cleared their trays for them, returning a moment later to sit back down by the sleeping, wounded woman he was so clearly falling in love with. Dr. Chakwas pushed away from her desk and came over to Shepard and Garrus' shared bed, moving from one side to the other as she looked over the monitors' readouts and scanned them both. Relief washed over Shepard when Garrus didn't refuse the painkillers the doctor offered him, and she watched his eyes glass over as they hit his system.
"I suppose you're going to insist you've spent long enough in bed?" Dr. Chakwas arched an eyebrow at Shepard.
Shepard settled back into her pillows next to Garrus. "Nope."
"No?" Dr. Chakwas raised an eyebrow, doubt crystal clear in her eyes.
"I'm staying right here with him, doc." Careful so as not to hurt him, Shepard lifted Garrus' hand in her own. "So if you think you need to pump more sedatives in me, go right on ahead."