Thane

Thane waited patiently, hands tucked behind his back as Garrus processed the request. He'd expected Garrus to show some hesitancy, for many reasons, the least of all being the unsettling idea of allowing a strange asari into his mind. No, Thane knew Garrus' deepest concerns were about Shepard; about being inside of her mind and seeing just how truly terrible things were for both Dawn and all of the others. Admittedly, both prospects left Thane a little shaken, too.

"Who is she? The asari?" Garrus asked, mandibles fluttering softly.

"Her name is Avalina. She's someone I've known for many years and trust." Thane moved to sit down across from Garrus, resting his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands. "She will keep Shepard's secrets, as well as our own, you have my word."

Jack stood up from the couch without comment and went into the kitchen. A moment later, the sounds of running water filled the silence. She'd remained unusually quiet throughout Thane's proposal, and he found he appreciated the fact. As much as Jack meant to Garrus, and indeed to Shepard, it didn't seem appropriate for her to have a say in the matter. Perhaps it was selfish of him, or even a sign that he still struggled with the concept and dynamics of sharing lovers, but nevertheless, it was how he felt.

Garrus chuffed and rubbed a hand over his face before scratching at the edge of the plates along his jaw. The hide still carried scars and a hint of inflammation, but otherwise, he was healing nicely. "Alright. Call your friend. I hope you're right about this."

Breathing a relieved sigh, Thane dipped his head. "Indeed. I believe this is our safest option. I will contact her and ask her to come to the Citadel right away."

Waiting on the catwalks near the entrance to the docks, Thane spotted Avalina the moment she stepped onto the Citadel. Instantly, her gaze searched the darkness of his perch, seeking him out, and he chuckled softly to himself. She knew him too well. He stepped out of the shadows and nodded when she found his gaze. Smiling, she disappeared into the crowd.

A couple of minutes later, the soft clank of her boots against the metal announced her approach. Avalina was perfectly capable of moving in silence when she wanted to, but she rarely cared enough to make a point of it since her retirement. The former commando stopped next to him and leaned against the railing.

"Thank you for coming." Thane dipped his head to her, and she nodded. "I fear what I must ask you will be as awkward for you as it is for me."

Although Avalina had a mischievous spark, she carried a lot of pain in her heart. She'd mated with a drell many, many years ago, and they had a child together. Her mate, Keto, was killed in a robbery, protecting a batarian child on the Citadel, and she'd never allowed herself to love another since. When her daughter was killed, Thane helped her seek justice against those responsible—in the manner he was best skilled. It was the least he could do after she'd saved him, nursing him back to health and sanity after he tortured and slaughtered the men who sent an assassin to his home … and then did the same to the assassin, as well.

Avalina told Thane once before that he reminded her of Keto.

She sighs, turns away from me. "You remind me of her father." Bitterness mixes with sorrow in her voice. "Another damn drell who didn't know what was best, too foolish to not answer the door when trouble knocks."

She arched a brow and smirked. "I'm listening."

Clearing his throat, he tucked his hands behind his back. "There is something I wish to speak with you about, but I hope to tell you through our joined minds—to ensure, beyond all doubt, we are not overheard. It's a matter of safety for someone very close to me."

Her other brow inched up to join the first, and she blinked a few times. Her silence stretched long enough for him to start to doubt she'd agree, but after a moment, she licked her lips and said, "Alright. Where do you want to do this?" Her words came slow, voice guarded, and it made him regret the necessity for such a request.

"I've rented an apartment on the Presidium." Turning, he waved his hand toward the ladder.

"The Presidium?" She walked past him, glancing back over her shoulder. "Isn't that a bit too exposed for you?"

"I'm … not here on business. You'll understand, soon," he said, following after.

Dread coated the back of his throat. In all his years, he'd never once permitted a joining with an asari nor imagined he'd ever find himself in a position to ask for the meld. He doubted anything other than a threat to the safety of someone he held dear could've ever convinced him to take the leap of faith.

Avalina folded her legs beneath her, sitting on the floor across from him. She studied him for a moment, and he rubbed his palms over his knees. Her leaden-blue complexion seemed a little paler than usual, and she sucked in a deep breath before letting it out slowly. "Are you ready?" she asked, turning her hands out to him.

Chest tightening, an ache setting in, he pushed it aside and settled his hands into hers. Her fingers closed around his, and she took another deep breath. He'd witnessed the melding before, and so he thought he knew what to expect. He listened as she spoke softly to him about the bonds that unite every living thing, her gaze lowered to the floor between them. Then, she met his gaze again, her eyes blackened by her nictitating membrane.

He felt as if he were falling into an abyss, suffocating by his own inability to remember how to draw breath.

Images flashed before his eyes, the faces of those he killed, all the lives his body claimed while his soul slept. He saw Irikah and Kolyat as a boy. His mother and father, and those who trained and mentored him in the Compact. He saw Shepard, her violet eyes gazing into his, cheeks flushed with her arousal.

And then, there was nothing. He floated in a sea of darkness, Avalina at his side.

The guards stationed outside of the door to Shepard's suite eyed Avalina and Jack wearily, but neither woman paid them any attention. It surprised Thane how easily Jack and Avalina took to one another, their personalities and life experiences seeming so utterly in contrast. Nevertheless, they began speaking and laughing with one another within minutes of their meeting.

Shepard's gaze snapped right to him when James opened the door, a smile broke across her face like lightning illuminating the night sky. Her focus shifted from him to the others who arrived with him, smile growing wider as she rose to her feet and began her approach. When her gaze snagged on Avalina, her step hesitated ever so slightly, confusion flooding her features for a moment before the familiar mask of command slipped into place.

"Siha." Thane smiled, slipping past James with a nod, and made his way to Shepard.

Her grin returned, and she opened her arms to him, so he stepped into her embrace. The warmth of her body and the sweet scent of hair and skin flooded his senses, making his heart ache and his flesh beg for him to take her to bed so he might make love to her and then fall asleep in her arms. Pulling back enough to look into his eyes, she pressed her palm to his face. With one last squeeze, he let her go, and she moved to greet Garrus and Jack in much the same fashion.

"Siha," he said when she released Jack, "I would like you to meet a good friend of mine." He took a few steps back toward Avalina and held a hand out to indicate the asari. "Her name is Avalina, and she has come at my request to help us."

"Commander Shepard." She closed the distance between herself and Avalina, holding out her hand in greeting. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise." Avalina dipped her head and shook Shepard's hand. "It's quite an honor to meet such a famed Spectre."

Stepping back, Shepard raked a hand through her hair, letting out a soft chuckle and a chagrined smile. "Thanks. I wish it were under better circumstances and in a more inviting setting."

Avalina smiled but offered no other response. A moment later, everyone turned to look at Thane, expectation clear in their eyes. He brought a fist to his mouth and coughed gently before tucking his hands behind his back.

"If you are willing," he said, his gaze sliding back to his siha, "Avalina has agreed to meld with us—Garrus, you, and myself—so that we may speak in true privacy within the confines of the joining."

Face contorting with apparent conflicted emotions, Shepard crossed her arms over her chest and paced away. He tracked her movements, praying to Arashu that he hadn't upset her enough to set her back. She'd made so much progress …. She crossed the floor to stand in front of her shelf for a moment, her gaze roaming the photographs and memorabilia of her loved ones before moving on to stand in front of the window.

Minutes passed in silence before she bowed her head and asked, "Does she know what to expect?"

"Yes, siha." Thane moved to stand next to her, settling a hand on the small of her back. "I—I melded with her before coming here, so that I might inform her of what to expect and what I needed from her." He sucked in a deep breath when she met his gaze, violet eyes searching his for answers to questions he could only guess at. "I hope you can forgive me for not asking permission to share your story, first. For what it is worth, I do trust Avalina."

She turned and sighed, pressing her palm to his cheek before leaning in and kissing him. It was sudden and chaste, over far too soon, and yet utterly unexpected. He blinked, and she rested her forehead against his.

Sighing again, she nodded and turned back to face the others. "Okay. So … how do we do this?"

Whispers and screams filled the void, confused ramblings colliding into a cacophony of noise as faces began to form out of the darkness. Invisible hands grabbed at him as the strange, new world fought to solidify around him and the others. When it did, a woman with a mischievous smirk, vibrant green eyes, and a shock of red hair moved closer. At once, Thane knew the woman was Jane.

"Jane," he said, regaining his composure and bowing his head to her.

Her eyebrow twitched. "What gave it away?"

"Ah. I suppose you might say you carry your personality on your face." He turned, looking around him, finding Garrus and Avalina staring at the sea of faces, awe, curiosity, and fear etched into their expressions.

A man shuffled his feet, moving a little closer to Jane. He cleared his throat, standing at what Shepard called 'parade rest', and nodded his head to first Thane and then Garrus. "This is most certainly a welcome surprise. It's so good to see the two of you again, in person, I guess you might say. I'm John; Commander John Shepard." He rubbed his hand over his jaw, fingers raking over stubble creating a crackling sound. "Although I admit, I'm disappointed you didn't bring Jack in with you."

Garrus hummed, moving to stand at Thane's side. "You're the one Dawn talked about helping her," he said, his gaze sliding to Jane, "the one Jane hated so much." He let out a low rumble and flicked his mandibles. "Hello, Jane."

"Garrus," she said, swallowing as tears welled in her eyes. "I'm so glad to see you." Sucking in a deep breath, she turned and gestured out at the crowd surrounding them. "Come on, I'll take you to Dawn."

"Thane?" a warbling voice called out, and he turned to the sound.

A woman with delicate features and blond hair pushed her way through the crowd to stand in front of him, hands covering her mouth as she gazed into his eyes. The love he saw there overwhelmed him, bringing the sting of a wave of sorrow. He wished he knew each of their faces, each of their names. He wanted to be able to recognize them as easily as they did him and hold the memories of their time spent together.

She cleared her throat and rocked on her heels a little. "It's me," she said, pushing her fingertips against her chest, tears spilling down her cheeks, "Brooke."

"Brooke," he said, easily recognizing the name of the woman who broke through at the end of Shepard's coma. "Hello again, siha."

A keening sob tore through her lips, and he did the only thing he could, opening his arms to her. She wasted no time closing the distance, pressing herself against his chest, and he held her close. She clung to him with the same desperation as she had the night she first made herself known, but it lacked the sort of frantic confusion of that other time. Somehow he knew she'd found a better grasp of her situation, but he wasn't sure if it made things better or worse for Brooke.

It took quite some time to quiet everyone. Embracing Brooke opened the floodgates of Shepards pressing in around Thane and Garrus. Loved ones of varying degrees and natures plead for their chance to speak their peace and reach out to touch them. It tore at Thane's heart, and he could tell it did the same to Garrus. Finally, though, with Avalina's insistence that she wouldn't be able to hold the meld indefinitely, the others left them be.

Jane led them through the darkness, the crowd parting for them but never straying far behind. John and Brooke, as well as a few others, stayed nearby. He tried to imagine what it must've been like before Dawn began taking in the disconnected, wounded souls. By the sounds of things, only about half of them remained with the collective, but still, the noise and oppressive feeling of being surrounded by desperate, unstable people overwhelmed him and prevented him from letting his guard down.

And yet, it truly was a miracle to behold.

"Dawn," Garrus said, pain and fear raw and fierce in his subvocals.

Thane turned to Garrus, following the man's trajectory until he, too, laid eyes on the raven-haired woman they both loved so deeply. She sat on the ground, knees pulled up to her chest, arms wrapped around her legs as she stared off at the nothingness.

"Dawn," Garrus said again, rushing to her side and dropping to his knees before her.

Slowly, she turned her head to look at him and blinked. Tears welled up in her eyes. "Garrus?"

He pressed his palm to her face, keening as he rested his forehead against hers. "Spirits …." Sitting flat, he folded his legs and pulled her onto his lap, cradling her against his chest. "It's me, I'm here. I'm here. Thane's here, too."

At that, Thane made his way over, crouching in front of the two, and stroked his hand over her hair. "Siha … we can't stay in here like this for long. Avalina is growing weaker. We came because we need to speak with you about The Intelligence." He glanced around at the other Shepards and added, "All of you." Turning his attention back to her, he smiled even as his heart shattered to find her looking at him with anguish in her eyes.