A/N: I was reading my original A/N for this chapter (the one from spring 2004), and this must've been the day I got detention for making a paper airplane with pictures of people I didn't like dying on it… Ha ha… wow… I'm so bad… u.u Interesting memories, though. Ah well. Enjoy the chapter! Sorry for the wait; I got lazy! SO SORRY! Please review!

19. Kuwabara's Plan C and Spritzy's Problem

"Good morning, students. It's the almighty Kazuma Kuwabara speaking again!" Kuwabara was once again doing the school announcements, much to everyone's displeasure. Keiko had to shove over and let him do it because he wouldn't stop begging. Kuwabara's groveling was such a pathetic sight, that Keiko just had to give in. "Today is Thursday…"

Another two minutes later, after the usual school notices were vocalized, Kuwabara had another "important" announcement to make to the class. Botan sank down in her seat, covering her ears with her hands and her face flushing red..

"I have another important announcement to make today," he said. A few people in Botan's homeroom started to laugh, looking at her. Botan shrank even lower into her chair. "This is for someone very special… Keiko Yukimura, my darling sweetie-pie… Will you go out with me?"

The whole class erupted in laughter. Botan sat up straight and sighed with relief. Keiko, in the front of the room, turned bright right and clenched her fist. I am going to KILL Kuwabara! she inwardly shouted. The nerve of that idiot!

"Kazuma Kuwabara, I need to speak to you," Keiko said levelly, trying to keep the anger in her voice down to a bare minimum.

Kuwabara giggled happily as he shoved his face right in Keiko's. "What's up, honey-bun?" he asked, wiggling his eyebrow in a flirtatious manner.

"This!" Keiko brought her fist back and sucker-punched Kuwabara right in the face. He stumbled backward, his lips and nose bleeding. "Wh-what?" he gasped. "What was that for?" Keiko didn't answer; she responded with a swift kick to the groin, knocking him to the floor, crumpled in pain. To add insult to injury, she whacked him over the head with her binder and shouted, "What kind of act do you think you're pulling! If you think this is funny, it's not! What is your problem? You're worse than Yusuke!" She stomped away huffily, leaving Kuwabara on the ground, whimpering in pain.

"He's hopeless," Yusuke said to Spritzy after Keiko had walked away. "He'll never get a girl…"

Spritzy laughed. "He should just give up…"

"Welcome home, Spritz," Shibuki the dragon said as Spritzy walked into her rented three-room home. "Did you get any more kisses in?"

"No," Spritzy said brusquely. "I can't really do that without being conspicuous. It is a high school, and news will spread around fast that I'm a whore or something…"

"Well… you are… A glorified one, anyways…"

Spritzy hit Shibuki hard on the head with her fist, setting her bookbag down with her other hand. She took out a bottle of hard liquor from the refrigerator and blew the cap off with her spirit energy, letting it fall to the floor with a "clink". Sitting down on the rust-colored old couch in the living room/kitchen, she then took a long drink. Shibuki sat and watched his master down the whole bottle, then throw it aside.

"This imported stuff tastes like crap," Spritzy said. "Just like that stupid potion…"

"…and it will make you young forever," the old hag had told Spritzy the night she paid a visit to an ominous-looking portal to Demon World. The old woman had cornered Spritzy and then conned her into taking a potion that she had concocted from the blood of a supposedly-immortal demon that she claimed to had slain herself.

Spritzy took the vial with the potion in it and looked at it suspiciously. "Forever, you said?" Spritzy asked. "Is that so?"

"Well, there's a catch," the old woman said. "For one thing, I lied when I said you'd be young forever. You'd just be reverted back to your younger years and relive your life after that. It's like getting a second chance at reliving your past. And as your past was rather… abnormal… I'm sure you'd want another chance at a normal life, am I right?"

"Well, I like my life the way it is, but I suppose it wouldn't be so bad to see what it's like without fighting and training all the time…" Spritzy said pensively. Despite her morals and gut feeling that this was a bad idea, the temptation was terrible and impossible to resist. "Why not?"

"And the other catch is, you have to kiss five boys for the potion's spell to work," the old hag said. "If you don't, you will be reverted to the way you are now in exactly seven days. A week is enough to break five boys' hearts, right?"

Spritzy scowled, but she took the potion. "Don't expect me to give you anything for it," she said gruffly, turning her back to the old hag and leaving, but not before turning back and adding one last remark:

"And kissing five boys will be easy. Piece of cake."

"You're gonna have to just pick three more random boys to kiss tomorrow," Shibuki said sternly. "Friday's your last day."

"I know it is, shut up," snapped Spritzy rudely. "But I'm kind of having second thoughts about this reverting to my younger self thing though…"

"See? What did I tell you? I told you you'd regret this!" Shibuki said pretentiously. "I told you!"

"On the other hand…" Spritzy continued, ignoring him. "On the other hand, I kind of like being this little skanky whore at Yusuke's school… It's kind of fun and most certainly amusing messing with everybody's heads…"

"You sick, insensitive woman…" Shibuki sighed, shaking his head. "Make up your mind!"

Spritzy thought about her options. She could kiss three random guys by four o'clock tomorrow and stay young, or she could op out and return to her normal form. Each prospect suited her just fine, but she decided on staying young for a while. Nobody knows who I really am, she thought, What real harm could be done in this?

NEXT TIME: GIRL FIGHT AND SPRITZY'S TRUE IDENTITY REVEALED!

Reviewer Responses!

Kitsune Chic: And in this fanfic, one can never really tell who's lying and who's not. Or who changes their mind… Heh. Glad you liked the chapter! Thanks for the review!

Princess Random: Whoops, sorry for cursing you… :sweatdrop: I will say that Kurama's stalker is not an original character created from the "slightly disturbed" (that's an understatement, my dear reviewer u.u) depths of my mind – it's a character from the show. Which one it is, I can't say of course, silly. :-P Thanks for the review!

evilchik: Heh, congrats on a lucky guess. :-P Just kidding. I never REALLY said the Kurama x stalker pairing was far-fetched… I just THINK it is, but the author cannot speculate for her entire reading and reviewing populace on what could be considered "far-fetched". Ha ha, I gave you a lawyer answer. XP But that's cool you like Spritzy… :snickers: Oh man, I am so amused… That makes me happy. Anyway, wow, you got another pairing right – Kuwabara and Keiko… however short-lived it was. Congrats again! Thanks for the review!

Red Kitsune Flames: One of the stalker issues was settled anyway. The main one of her identity has yet to be solved, but of course, that allure just adds to the fun, ne? Thanks for the review! Glad you liked the chapter!

RaieChibiKid: Yay, I have accomplished my ultimate goal of "weirding you out"! n.n Yay for me. :does dance: Lol, I think this is funny. Half of my reviewers hate Spritzy, and the other half like her. Either way, I laugh at what ya'll think about her. 'Tis so amusing. Anyway, glad you liked the chapter; thanks for the review!

Sami Kurama's Stalker: Well… I think I'll just let you see when (or if) the stalker is revealed for yourself. ;) Don't think I didn't ask my buddy to add black to the color poll list. But she got all indignant and was like, "No, I already started the poll, and I don't want to change it!" Baka baka baka… :shakes head: Ah well. Thanks for the review!

jojogoodgirlgonebad2005: Really? You never expected a Shizuru x Hiei pairing? Hm, that's very interesting. I personally am a fan of the Shizuru x Hiei pairing. Shizuru is the only girl I could ever really see Hiei with… His other option in my book is Kurama or… just nobody. A life of miserable aloneness… But I digress! Glad you liked the chapter, and thanks for the review!

fallentears666: I'm glad you liked the chapter. I really like the Shizuru x Hiei pairing. Fun Fact: My first YYH fanfic ever had a Hiei x Shizuru pairing. n.n; I'm glad I'm keeping you in suspsense! Thanks for the review!

Deus x Machina: And can you really see Hiei or Shizuru with anyone else? … Well, okay, badly phrased question, but… eh. Thanks for the review!

Takara Taji: Wow, thank you for all the reviews! They is greatly appreciated. It's so much fun to see your review count skyrocket like that… ha ha, thank you. Yep. Kurama's smart enough to know his real stalker. What a good boy he is, ne? Anyway, thanks for the review!

kittyluv: Lol, hey now, dozens of other people have left incorrect guesses as to who the stalker is in their reviews; you can do the same. … Hee hee, I'm just nosy and wanna know who you think it is, tee-hee. Wow, I do the 2am-get-up-at-7-thing too… sometimes. That's why caffeine is my friiiieeeend… Except with me it's usually 1am, but same difference! Anyway, thanks for the review!

Jillian Jiggs: Thank you very much:bows: Glad you liked it!

blue kitsune251: Glad you're having fun in Cali! I've always wanted to go there… I mean, there's Disneyland and earthquakes (always wanted to feel one of those n.n;) and movie stars! And lots of shops and hot, shirtless guys who surf! XDDD O.O Wow… you're tall! I feel so short… again! 5"3… T.T I used to be the same height as the guys I liked (even taller!) back in 6th and 7th grade, but now, they all just tower over me… it's so sad… :sniff: Lol, thanks for the review!

--crazykitsune17--