A/N: Got it! New computer and the works. Time for a lovely update. (Oh ye of little faith! Did ye honestly think I would have forgotten you, the gentle reader, with all of the constant demanding reviews?)

The tension was growing. Shock was about to spill the beans. Would her "true love" be the skeletal king of Halloween land? Would it be the jolly ruler of Christmas Town? The two-faced mayor? Oogie Boogie? The Behemoth? Vampire number 1, 2, or 3? Would it be one of the children in the Christmas montage? An elf? Dr. Finkelstein? Igor? The wolf-man? The Clown with the tear-away face? The one hiding under your bed? The one hiding under your stairs? The 'Who' when you call 'Who's there?'" The shadow on the moon at night? A random ghost? Vincent Maloy? One of the skeletons hanging from the tree? The Grim Reaper? Someone else the author is just pulling out of left field? Or would it be-

Readers- "Just write the freaking story!"

Me- "Okay…."

"Alright! Fine!" Shock jumped up and began dancing around the room as she practically sang her praise. "I love Harlequin! I LOVE him! I'm head-over-heels-to-the-moon-and-back-kill-anyone-who-stands-in-my-way IN LOVE! I love Harlequin!" She began panting and looked like she was going to pass out. "Are…..you…..happy…..now?"

Miss Hilling took a few moments to digest the newly divulged information. "Yes, Shock. I'm sure you are too. Now," her voice was calm and soothing. "Have a seat." The witch girl sat on the sofa and played with a strand of her stringy hair. She just sighed and began to mumble incoherently. "Look, does Harlequin know how you feel about him?"

"Sort of…." She grinned.

"What do you mean by 'sort of?'"

"Weeeeell," a cackle escaped her mouth. "I've been sending him notes…and pictures I drew for him…and strands of hair from my hat…and bits of cloth from a blanket I stole from his bed one day while he was on vacation...and I trained his parrot to sing 'We Close Our Eyes.' I think he gets the id-"

"Wait wait wait wait." Miss Hilling leaned forward a bit. "You've stolen from him. The notes, drawing. Shock, I hate to tell you this, but you're not in love. You're a stalker."

Shock just stared at the woman thoughtfully. "I think I see where you're coming from, but trust me! This IS love. I'm not a stalker. I'm not quiet enough to stalk."

"Trust me. The last girl like you I talked to was 'in love' with was 'in love' with Benicio Del Toro. That didn't fare so well."

"Well, so what if I'm a stalker? That's Harlequin's problem, not mine."

"Another thing, Shock. I think he's a little….you know….'colorful.'"

"What?"

"I mean, I think he doesn't like Dos Equis."

"Of course he doesn't drink, we live in a PG area."

"No. I mean…." She tried to think of a nice way to put it. "He's a bit of a fairy."

"No, I'm pretty sure he's just a monster-"

"He's gay!" Miss Hilling was sick of hinting.

"No way!" Shock looked shocked. (Pardon the pun.) "He's as straight as a toothpick! He's just a fan of color and decoupage and fashion and-and-and….oh crap."

"Sad but true, girl. The good ones are always gay or taken. But look on the bright side, now you have no reason to stalk Harlequin."

"Yes I dooooooo." Her grin was, in a word, "disturbing."

"You know, we're going to have to work on-oops! Times up!" She stood up and extended her hand to Shock, who then proceeded to flip the woman over her shoulder and across the room in a very 'Karate Kid' manner. Miss Hilling wobbled up and opened the door.

Once in the waiting room, the patient and secretary found Jack and Freud watching 'Golden Girl's re-runs on the television miss Hilling kept concealed under her desk. Jack let out uproarious laughter. "Oh, that Sofia! She is SUCH a spicy old woman!" Freud just stared blankly at him and got up at the sight of Shock and Hilling.

"Ah," Freud smiled victoriously. "Not so easy is it, Miss Know-It-All-Smarty-Pants?"

"Actually she did a better job than you did." Shock grinned and skipped out to the car.

Hilling smiled and resumed her seat at the desk.

"Well, thank you both very much. You two have been such a great help thus far. I'll bring Barrel in next week."

Dr. Freud nodded and spoke up quickly as Jack turned to leave. "Um, Mr. Skellington, there's still the matter of your payment. You see, Shock and Lock's appointments have yet to be paid for and the first-"

"Yes, thank you very much Dr. Freud. I have to get going now!" Jack ran down to the hearse. He got in, revved up the engine, and OFF he and Shock were to Halloween Town.