Disclaimer: I don't own any copyrighted characters/other endorsements and blah blah blah.

Spike and Jet watched television while sitting on the couch.

Jet said, "Say, Spike, do you remember when you wore that long-haired wig?"

Spike said, "Yeah, that was a while ago. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, no particular reason…cept' you looked like a woman."

"So what are you saying?"

"You made me gender confused."

"What, do I turn you on? Am I here to turn you on is that it?"

"No, Spike, it's just…"

"It's just what! Am I here to give you visual pleasure?"

"No…it's just…you make me question my sexuality. When I'm around you I feel a little uncomfortable. I think I'm gay!"

"Oh, why didn't you just say that in the first place?"

"I am gay!"

"I'm gay too."

"Really, I would have never guessed."

"So, why are you so gay?"

"What?" Jet was puzzled.

"You said you're gay…why?"

"Spike…I…you thought I meant happy didn't you?"

"DUR! That's what gay means stupid. Dee dee dee!"

Jet sighed lightly and put his hand on his forehead. "Whatever you say, Spike. I'm going to go masturbate—I mean tend to my Bonsai tree."

Spike stayed on the couch. He quickly bounced up when he saw Faye on the T.V. screen. "Jet, come in here! That ho is on sitcoms now."

"I'm almost there—I mean I'm almost done trimming the—ah, ah, oooh!" Jet yelled from another room.

"Well, when you done trimming the ah-ahs' come in here!"

Spike watched the screen closely. A person was interviewing Faye.

The person said," So what has Brain Crack done for you?"

"It has freed my body of all desires. Except my desire to take a shit…like right now." Faye replied.

"That's great!" The person said.

"No, seriously, I need to take a shit. Excuse me." Faye ran off the scene.

Spike changed the channel. A commercial was shown advertising Crack-a-Cola.

What do you get when your kids are on CRACK?

And they give blowjobs to a guy named JACK?

YOU GET CRACK-A-COLA!

Drink it…because it isn't addicting…too much.

Spike stared at the screen in sheer awe. "What the hell is wrong with these worlds?" Jet where you at man?"

"I'm right here." Jet looked at the screen. "That's Doctor Londes; he's responsible for the Brain Crack organization."

"And what does Brain Crack do exactly?"

"Basically, it's like a cult. They worship this nutcase."

"Let's cap this guy."

"For real, son. Dipset!"

Spike was (once again) confused. "What?"

"You were doing the Ebonics and so I…never mind."

(Narrator): Spike and Jet go to search Doctor Londes while Ed and Ein stay behind. Ed receives a message from Faye so— ah fuck it. This story doesn't need a narrator anyway. I quit!

Ed said, "Oh look Ein, it's Fay-Fay."

Faye said, "Ed…I need Brain Crack! Please, get some…I'm dying here…"

"Uh-oh! The connection was lost."

Jet was waiting on line in a store. He was talking to Spike on his walky-talky.

"Jet, you sure you want to do this?" Spike said.

"It's the only way now. I mine as well hack into the system. Besides, Faye looks like she's discovered somethin'."

"If you say so."

Jet received the Brain Crack videogame. He gave it to Ed and she placed it in the computer.

"Alright," Jet said. "Let's see what this baby can do."

Welcome to Crack. Do you want to join?

"Yes." Jet stated.

Please input personal data.

"Ed, put some phony info in."

Ed does and a message came up on the monitor again.

Crack engaged.

Doctor Londes started speaking.

Free your soul from its' unwanted desires. Crack can get you a new life; a better life. A life full of blowjobs and addiction.

Jet fell unconscious. Luckily, Ein was there. Ein bit him and he awoke conscious again. Jet picked up his walky-talky and got in touch with Spike.

"I was out cold in just a matter of seconds." Jet said.

Spike was on the other line. "Really? Well, I guess we have to go with my plan now."

"Wait no! Your plan is dumb. Don't you know you can get hurt?" Jet questioned.

"I don't like your attitude."

"My attitude doesn't like you."

Spike hung up and decided to go on with his plan.

Jet and Ed were walking to a building. They were both dressed in their formal wear.

"Alright, Ed, remember what I said. If the person asks who we are you say I'm your daddy. Got it?"

"You're my daddy."

"Yeah, that's good."

"Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!"

"That's fine, Ed."

"Oh Daddy!"

"Ed…I said that's fine damn it!"

A guard was standing stationary inside the building.

The guard said, "You may not proceed."

"My daughter just wants to see her brother one last time." Jet pleaded.

"Wait, your daughter? That's really a girl?" He pointed at Ed.

"Yes, why wouldn't she be a girl?"

"Um, never mind…just go on in."

Spike was talking to a monitor. It was Doctor Londes.

Television is the cause for all mayhem in the world…well worlds. It must be destroyed along with human existence.

Spike was not impressed. "You're just a kid; a kid who went into a comma several years ago. You shouldn't be thinking that deep."

You don't know me. You don't know anything about me.

"Cut the shit! Your cover has been blown. This is all the work of some kid's dream."

Spike began to shoot at the monitors. He smiled which made Dr. Londes perplexed.

Why are you so amused? Wait…no…I'm fading. This can't be happening. No! I don't want to go. I want all the people of the world to perish from giving cheap blowjobs for Crack. NOOOO!

The image on monitor faded. Dr. Londes could no longer be seen or heard.

Jet and Ed were standing next to a hospital bed. A young boy lied comatose on the bed.

"So it was all some kid's fantasy. Ronny Spange was a hacker. You're not a hacker anymore though. Nope, you're a fuckin' con artist."

Jet slapped hand-cuffs on his limp wrists.

Back in the rundown building filled with monitors, Faye awakened. Spike smiled at her in her vulnerable state.

Faye looked up at Spike. "Oh, hey Spike." She looked around. "Um, where am I?"

Spike laughed and said, "It's a long story."

Author's Note: Looks like this story will be coming to its' conclusion soon. I'm so mean to Jet, but you'll have to deal with it. It only gets worse from here folks.