Randomness Reborn
Chapter 2
Blerg. I think its been more than a year since I posted this….
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So, it was another sunny day at Destiny Isles and Sora and the gang were once again at Sora's house's ruins desperately searching for anything left undamaged… or at least Sora was… Did I mention that it was a sunny day? Yeah? 'k. Well Sora was trampling over the rubble of what he thinks might have been his old room… or closet… or whatever. The point is he stopped, kneeled and started sobbing uncontrolably. Probably over the fact that his whole family had been taken away in one fell swoop of a pure, cold-blooded dose of destiny. But no… it was his teddy bear…
"Mr. Bublous! No! Why has fate been so unkind on this poor soul? OH GOD WHY!"
It was then that Riku decided that he might as well just see what the hell was going on. "I hope its not that stupid Mr. Baubles or Buobulus teddy bear again…." He thought as he climbed the ruins of his best friend's house. When he arrived at the scene he saw that Kairi was already there, trying to comfort Sora and still laughing maniacally at times due to the death of Oprah Winfrey. "Ugh, please don't tell me its that stupid teddy bear again. It's the third time this week, and its getting pretty old-". He was cut off by the crazed shriek Sora let out when he heard the word "teddy"
After he finished shrieking, Kairi shook her head and started walking towards Riku, I think Sora didn't even notice… (Actually, I know he didn't notice, 'cause I'm kind of writing this…) 'Newayz when she got to Riku she murmured something about "hopeless" and "killing more of those fuggin' ni-(censored racist word). "Watch this" Riku told her and set off towards Sora. "Yo Sora! I think I saw a rabid coconut by the beach!" Sora didn't move, oh yeah, he had sunk into the ground and remained there as a lifeless heap 'cept for the crying. "And, uh… It… uh…. Had… Candy!" he yelled out the last word and in less than a sixteenth of a second Sora was running towars the beach screaming like a mad PONY.
"Ha! Works everytime!" he whispered triumphantly. "Geez you think that by now he would've figured out there wasn't a coconut tree at that side of the beach…" 'twas Kairi. "I guess he's just stupid.". An understatement… Now, it wasn't that Kairi didn't care about Sora… she didn't… or Riku, or Selphie for that matter but she hasn't been seen since last week and the last place were she was seen was at Kairi's house, but when Riku pointed that out everyone decided to ignore it, and when he asked the Sheriff the reason for his complete dismissal of the truth he simply replied, "That's life." I think that the wierdest part was that Selphie was his daughter… 'Newayz Kairi had more importants things to do… She'd tell you, but then she'd have to kill you.
5 Days Later
Well once again it was our main caracter, Riku sitting on the beach, contemplating the ocean… Now you all remember Dan the fish right? Well good for you. It just happened that the ancient gods of yore and antique lore decided to manipulate the fabric of space/time infinity to make it happen so that at that very moment, Kairi spotted Riku on the beach and ran to him, laughing for some demented reason. "Aww crap." Riku thought as she approached him and before he could run away, she had latched on to his arm and held on so tight that she cut off his circulation. Yes I know what yer thinkin' "Ohh he'll die" "Ohh, amputation" but I don't care, she looked like a goddamn METROID. Riku's arm was greenish when she let go (which was so fast that she didn't give Riku a chance to speak… yeah) and said "Hey wanna go to Sora's house's ruins?" "Again?" he replied. Suddenly, off in the distance, a voice was heard, and if you haven't already guessed, it was Sora…
"Hey, finally got over the teddy bear huh?" Kairi said. "Who?" Sora replied, "OH! Hey, Riku, guess what?".
"What?".
"Guess!"
"No, tell me."
"Guess!"
"You found a bucket of steam?"
"Guess!"
"What."
"Guess!"
It was at that time that Riku slapped him. Hard. Sora came back to his senses or at least as close as he could. "Oh, sorry. Anyway, I found that rabid coconut. Here, look!". Sora rummaged in his inmmense pockets and finally took out a coconut with a face roughly scratched into the surface. Riku stared at it for about 2 minutes, not really surprised, but really angry that someone stole his idea. "Where the hell did you get this?" he demanded.
FLASHBACK!11!11SHIFT!11ONE!
"Yo Sora! Whatcha doing, man?"
"OH, hey Wakka! Have you seen a rabid coconut around here?"
"I see many coconuts, man, but neva a rabid one, ya? I once saw a rabid mushroom thought… ya…"
"Yeah, cool. Hey, you seen Selphie?"
"Not since last week, ya-"
"LOOK! A rabid coconut! Yeeee!" Sora yelled as he ran towards something. "Actually, man, I think that's just Tidus, ya?" Wakka said. But Sora was already in the process of preparing for a full-scale headbutt at the human figure that couldn't possibly be a rabid coconut. Tidus jumped out of the way and dropped a coconut which had Wakka's face carved into it. The rest is not important…
FLASHBACK ENDSS!111111111111111
"You're a menace to yourself…" Riku stated and went back to sleep…
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Well heres the second installment of this would-be humor story, but you prolly didn't even laugh prolly. I know I didn't….
Z YAZ!