Of Dreams and Miracles
By Misha

Disclaimer and Notes in Prologue.

Part Twenty-Three: Old Feelings

Elizabeth was surprised when Robbie showed up on her doorstep a few days after Christmas.

Of course, his parents didn't live that far away, so maybe it wasn't that big of a surprise. However, on the other hand, he hadn't been to her house since they'd broken up almost a year before.

So, she was a little surprised that he had come by, especially since he was aware that Herb hated mixing his two worlds together.

"I thought you'd enjoy not seeing my dad for a few days, not go seek him out." She teased, moving aside so that he could enter.

Robbie shrugged as he shed his coats and boots. "Well, I was actually kind of hoping he wasn't home. I don't mind not seeing him, but I like see you. You're prettier."

"Thank you." Elizabeth said dryly as she hung up his coat and then led Robbie into the living room. "You are actually in luck, he had a meeting. So you came over, just to see my pretty face?"

"What? Aren't I allowed to spend time with a friend?" He retorted as they sat down on the couch. "I had nothing to do and I thought I'd see what you were up to this evening."

"Taking advantage of my time off, just like you should be." Elizabeth told him. "Practice resumes in a couple days and then we're in the pressure cooker."

"It's what we've been working so hard for." Robbie reminded her.

Elizabeth nodded, just as Patti came into the living room. "Elizabeth, who was at the-?" She began and then stopped when she saw Robbie. "Robbie, how nice to see you again."

Robbie stood up and smiled at her. "Hi, Mrs. Brooks."

Patti returned his smile, she'd set a rule with Herb long ago, that he didn't bring the game or his players home, which was fine with Herb since he preferred not to get personally involved, but Robbie was an exception to that rule. Of course, that was because it had been Elizabeth who had brought him home, and she'd brought him home first as a friend, then as her boyfriend, not as one of Herb's players.

"I just came by to see if Liz wanted to hang out." He explained with a charming smile. "I mean, if that's okay with you, I know you don't get to see a lot of her these days."

"No, that is definitely true." Patti agreed warmly. "But I've had her these last few days and I'm sure she's getting sick of being cooped up in the house, right sweetheart?"

"A little bit." Elizabeth admitted with a laugh.

Patti smiled at her. "Then you two go have fun, I'll see you later."
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Elizabeth and Robbie ended up going to local pub to play some pool. She had a good time and enjoyed the company. They had a lot of fun together, just like old times.

The two of them talked about everything, reminisced about old times, though artfully side-stepping any subjects that might be awkward, and they ended up laughing about everything under the sun.

The only other subject they avoided, was the team and the Olympics. It was only later that night, as Robbie drove her home, that the subject was brought up.

"Who do you think it's going to be?" He asked her quietly. "That goes home, I mean."

"I don't know." Elizabeth answered honestly. "I'm not even sure if Dad really knows yet."

"It's terrifying." Robbie confessed. "All I can think about is how much I hope that it's not me."

"I'm sure it won't be." She assured him. "I don't think Dad would cut you, he has to know how important you are to the team."

"Not any more so than the other twenty guys." Robbie told her. "One of has to go, it's that simple, and I think it could be any of us. Well, not Jimmy or Janney, they're pretty safe, but the rest of us are up in the air."

"I hope it's not you." Elizabeth said quietly, honestly.

She had grown fond of all the boys and couldn't imagine one of them not being there, but she had known all along that one of them would have to go.

However, the idea of it being Robbie filled her with dread. She wanted this for him, because she knew how much it meant to him. She also had to admit, if only to herself, that she liked seeing him every day, of having things be the way they were before--well almost.

Of all the boys, she wanted Robbie to stay more than anyone else, except Jack and perhaps Rizzo. Elizabeth cared about all the others, but those three were the most important to her.

Robbie pulled the car over to the side of the road.

"What are you doing?" Elizabeth demanded, wondering if there was something wrong.

Robbie didn't answer, he just leaned over and kissed her. For a moment, she was stunned and then she kissed him back. It just felt so familiar, so right, to be in his arms.

After all, for two and a half years, his arms had felt like home to her. And now, even after everything, it felt like coming home after long time away and that feeling just overwhelmed her and made her forget everything else.

Finally, after a long moment, the kiss ended and reality hit her like a wave of cold water.

"Oh, my god." She whispered in disbelief. "Oh, my god." She pulled away and cradled her face in her hands. "What in the Hell did I just do?"

"Lizzie," Robbie began softly.

"Don't, please." She begged and then she glared at him. "Why did you do that?"

"Because it felt right." He told her. "For both of us, don't deny it, I know you felt it."

"I'm not allowed to feel it." Elizabeth said adamantly, fiddling with the silver chain around her neck.

"Because of Herb?" Robbie asked in disbelief. "Since when do you let your father decide how you feel?"

"No, not because of Dad, because of Jack!" Elizabeth exclaimed and shut her eyes. "Damn."

Robbie stared at her, his eyes full of shock and anger. "You and O.C? Since when?"

"October." Elizabeth admitted, not seeing the point in lying.

"Two months!" Robbie exclaimed in disbelief. "And you didn't say anything?"

"We kept it quiet because of my dad." Elizabeth explained. "He'd be furious if he found out. Also, we didn't want it to be awkward with the rest of the guys."

Robbie shook his head angrily. "I can't believe it."

"Robbie, I'm sorry I never wanted to hurt you." She told him honestly. He stared straight ahead. "Robbie, this has nothing to do with you." Elizabeth said quietly. "What we had, it was over before I even met Jack. You and I, it's just history now."

"Can you honestly say that?" Robbie demanded. "Can you look me straight in the eye and you don't have any feelings for me?"

"No." Elizabeth said, shaking her head. There was no point in denying it, he wouldn't believe her. So she decided to be completely honest.

"You know I can't, but that doesn't mean I want to be with you either. Too much has happened between us." She stated clearly, shaking her head again. "You're the one that dumped me, remember? You ended it, not me."

She had been devastated, especially since he had tried afterwards to pretend as if nothing had changed between them. Not in a romantic sense, but in a friends sense, it was like he hadn't realised that that part had been affected just as much as the other part.

He hadn't seemed to understand that he couldn't have it both ways, he couldn't not want to be with her, yet expect nothing else to have changed between them. She couldn't be his friend when she was still in love with him and the would was still raw, but he had kept trying to press it, to make things go back to normal and it had just made everything worse.

It had been a very tense time and Elizabeth was grateful that it was behind them, the last thing she wanted to do was dredge it up again.

"I was an idiot!" Robbie exclaimed, looking at her pleadingly.

"Maybe, maybe not, but it's history leave it there." Elizabeth told him quietly. "We're friends again, Robbie, really friends and that's important to me. I lost that once and I don't think I could bear to do it again. Can't we just leave everything else along?"

Robbie was silent for a long time. "If that's what you want." He said finally.

"It is." Elizabeth told him softly.

Robbie nodded and started up the car.

"You're not going to tell my dad, are you?" She asked a moment. "About Jack, I mean?"

"No." Robbie assured her. "I wouldn't do that to you, Liz. Besides, it's none of my business, is it?"

"No." Elizabeth agreed. "It isn't."
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