Of Dreams and Miracles
By Misha

Disclaimer and Rating in Prologue.

A.N- The song in this chapter is "Hold Me Now" by the Thompson Twins, I thought it fit, set up the mood of the chapter.

Part Twenty-Five: Examining the Heart

I have a picture
Pinned to my wall
An image of you and me
And we're laughing and loving it all

When Elizabeth got home from Kathleen's, she went to her room and took a box out of her closet.

She sat down on her bed and opened it. The box contained the mementoes of her relationship with Robbie.

She took a picture out and stared at it, it was of the two of them together, his arms wrapped around her waist.

She smiled sadly. She had been so in love with then, perhaps, deep down, part of her still was. First love was a hard thing to get over, after all, but she was positive she had been honest when she said that she didn't want to be with Robbie.

Look at our life now
All tattered and Torn
We fuss and fight in the light
And we cry until dawn

Elizabeth didn't want to be with him again. She didn't want to go back there again. It had been oh, so sweet, but oh, so painful, as such things usually were. The agony and the ecstasy...

Elizabeth ran her fingers over Robbie's smiling face and smiled at the memories.

She had been drawn to him from the moment she had first set eyes on him.

They had been good friends from almost the first day they met, in time, during that first year she had known him, he had become almost as good as friend to her as Kathleen. He had been someone she could confide in and lean on.

Falling in love had only deepened the bond between them, but the break-up had severed it, or at least severely damaged it. They were friends again, but they weren't as close as the had once been, and Elizabeth doubted that they could ever be again.

But at least, he was in her life again.

Hold me now
Hold my heart
Stay with me
Let loving start,
Let loving start
Oh, hold me now,
Oh, hold my heart
Stay with me
Let loving start
Let loving start

Robbie was her friend, he was there and she couldn't give that up again; she wouldn't risk damaging that bond a second time.

That meant even if there was no Jack, Elizabeth still couldn't be with Robbie.

Besides, Jack was in the picture. They had a relationship, it wasn't the same as she had with Robbie, but that was only to be expected. It was new and it was different and it was special...

Elizabeth put the picture of her and Robbie back in the box and put the lid back on it. Some things belonged in the past.

You say I'm a dreamer
We're two of kind
With both of us searching
For some perfect world we know we'll never find.

Elizabeth gently touched the necklace Jack had given her. It was so beautiful and so fragile. Kind of like her feelings for Jack.

She got up and walked over to her desk and grabbed a bunch of pictures she had gotten developed a few days earlier. Pictures she had taken on one of those many occasions when she had gone out with the boys.

She had taken the pictures, because she wanted some solid reminders of this time, this experience.

Elizabeth knew that she'd never forget it, but these pictures would capture it forever in Technicolor, unchanged by whatever happened next.

Perhaps I should leave here
And go far away
But you know that there's no where I'd rather be
Than with you here today

Elizabeth pulled out a picture of her, Jack and Rizzo. She was standing between them, smiling up at the camera.

She looked at it now, a small smile on her face. Rizzo had grown to be such a good friend to her and then there was Jack...

Elizabeth looked intently into the picture of his handsome face and her smile grew bigger. She hated the secrets, hated the lies, but it was worth it because she got to be with Jack.

Hold me now
Hold my heart
Stay with me
Let loving start,
Let loving start
Oh, hold me now,
Oh, hold my heart
Stay with me
Let loving start
Let loving start

Just looking at a picture of him made her feel all warm and tingly inside. She didn't know what the future would bring them and the whole situation was so damned complication, with her father and Robbie, but she couldn't give up being with Jack.

He made her feel alive again. When she was with, she forgot all her worries, all her problems and just felt joy. It had been a long time since she had felt that way, been so happy.

She couldn't give that up.

Not for anything.

You ask if I love you
And what could I say
To know that I do
And that this is just one if those games that we play
So I sing you a new song,
You just don't cry anymore
And I ask for forgiveness
Though I don't know just what I'm asking it for
---