A/N: This is the last chapter. I didnt know how to end it. I had a bad case of writer's block. So yes, but here it is. I'm sorry because it's not really good. And it might be a little fast. But i think this is the best i can do. Nonetheless, please review.
Disclaimer: You know they're not mine. Well, except for Taylor of course.
Chapter 3
I don't know what to do. I'm sitting here next to Derek. We were both watching our daughter that he never knew about. I have the obligation to tell him and he has the right to know.
Clearly he still has feelings for me. Unless he's just telling this to make me think he still loves me. But Derek wouldn't do that.
I've been arguing with myself whether to tell him that he has a daughter. I'm scared of how he'll react. Will he be mad at me for keeping it to him? Would he accept her? He probably would. What will happen next?
I will never find out unless I tell him of course.
"Derek…." I took a deep breath. This is it. I said looking up at him. He was looking at Taylor who was just running around playing by herself.
"Yeah?" He said and then looked up at me.
"This isn't going to be easy"
"What's not going to be easy?"
"What I'm going to tell you"
"Oh. Well, whatever it is I guess I can take it"
"Okay, see, I wasn't entirely honest to you"
"What do you mean?" He looked at me with so much confusion in his eyes.
"Taylor, she's…. She's your daughter" I just blurted it out. I didn't know any other way to say it to him. I wasn't even going to say it. But I was caught in the moment. Honestly, I'm ready for the worst that could happen. I'm ready is he'll just walk away. I can do this.
I'm suddenly ready to let my heart break again. If ever
"Oh" He said, obviously shocked. He shifted his gaze to Taylor. "Does she know?"
"No"
Then there was a silence. It wasn't excruciating but it wasn't comfortable either.
"I'm sorry" I said quietly. I looked up at him and he looked up at me.
"Don't be. I understand, we didn't leave things in good terms" he offered a weak smile. He reached for my hand and squeezed it. "I'm sorry"
"For what?"
"For not being there"
"It's not your fault" I said smiling at him. "Are we good?"
"We're good. I'm shocked. But we're good. I'm glad"
"I'm happy you are. I've been scared to go here since I didn't know what to do"
"You did the right thing"
"I was scared how you'll react" I said with a hint of sadness in my voice.
"I didn't know how to react. But I have to accept it"
"Yeah" I sighed.
Then there was a comfortable silence. He was still holding my hand. We looked at Taylor, who was still playing.
"You've always wanted a daughter" I said breaking the silence.
"Yeah, that's why I was a little jealous when I found out you have a daughter. I wished it were with me" He smiled at me.
"Then you got your wish"
Taylor came running to us and jumped to sit on my lap. He looked at Derek with a wide grin on her face.
"Hi" She said to him.
"Not too shy now, I see" Derek said
"Taylor, this is Derek, he's your daddy" I said. Taylor looked at him. She just stared. Her emotion couldn't be read. She stood from my lap and sat on Derek's. She hugged him so tight and Derek hugged her too. The sight made my heart break.
How could have I kept such thing to both of them?
Tears welled up in my eyes. I don't know if its tears of joy or tears of sadness.
Derek looked at me and smiled.
"I love you" Taylor mumbled against Derek's chest.
"Me too" Derek said lovingly.
A tear fell, I couldn't help it. He reacted the way I wanted him to. But my fears are still here. I don't know what's going to happen when we go back to New York.
I don't want Taylor to be too attached to him and I don't want him to be attached to her.
It'll break their hearts when I have to separate them again.
Derek reached for my face and wiped the tear. Taylor pulled herself away from Derek and she just sat there.
There was silence once again. I could hear the birds chirping and the wind blowing. I stared back at the calm river my thoughts flying away.
Derek's pager filled the silence. He looked at me apologetically.
"I'm sorry, I have to take this" She said as she kissed Taylor on the head and kissed me on the cheek. "How about dinner tonight after work" I nodded. "Where are you guys staying?"
"Same hotel" I said and smiled at him.
"Okay, bye Addi, bye Taylor" He said and walked away.
I was left in silence with Taylor who was just looking at me. Another tear fell and she wiped it. She rested her head on my chest and we stayed like that for a long time.
Taylor and I were watching TV at our hotel suite when someone knocked at the door. I knew that it was Derek. I stood up and opened the door.
"Derek" I greeted him. He kissed me on the cheek and I gestured for him to come in. He stepped in and Taylor came running to him.
"Daddy!" she squealed in glee and ran to his arms. Derek scooped her up and we went back to the couch in front of the TV.
"You hungry?" I asked.
"I can wait. Are you hungry though?" He asked. I shook my head but Taylor nodded. "Okay, then lets eat"
We ordered room service and talked throughout the whole dinner. I filled him in about Taylor. Taylor was really comfortable around Derek and so was Derek around Taylor. It was a natural thing. It was instinct. This is what scares me.
"Daddy?" Taylor said and stifled a yawn.
"Yes, Taylor?"
"I'm sleepy. Tuck me in?" Taylor requested. Derek looked at me and I nodded to him. He scooped Taylor in his arms and tickled her as they walked to the bed.
I smiled to myself knowing that Derek is really happy about Taylor.
But what's going to happen next?
After a few minutes later Derek went back to the couch where we were seating. I handed him a glass and poured wine in it.
"Thanks" he said taking the glass from my hand. He sat next to me.
"So…." I started.
"I miss you" He said again. He's been saying that since we talked in the park.
"Me too" I smiled
"Seriously. I'm not just saying it. I really mean it"
"Me too"
"You're not seeing anyone?" he asked eyeing at me.
"No, actually there's this guy, Daniel, butI just broke up with him a months ago" I said.
"May I ask why?" Should I tell him the truth? Of course I will.
"Because I wasn't over this other guy… even until now" I looked at him I swallowed hard. He took a sip from his wine and moved a little closer to me.
"You know, funny thing, that's the reason why Meredith and I fell apart too"
I let out a little laugh. He moved a little closer again. He took my hand and rested it on his thigh.
"Well, tell me about that woman that you're not over with. Is she anything like Meredith?"
"Well, this girl I wasn't over with, she's nothing like Meredith. She's better. But I took her for granted."
"Well, you shouldn't have. She must have been really broken since you took her for granted."
"She really was. She left me here in Seattle"
"She must have been really lonely for leaving a guy like you behind."
"She must have. I was actually wondering if she still loves me because I still love her" He said gazing in my eyes.
"I'm sure she does. You're hard not to love"
He leaned over and kissed me on the lips, a kiss that I haven't felt in so long. I kissed back with so much passion, so much love.
"You know, she probably misses that kiss" I said smirking at him.
"Yeah, and maybe she misses the sex too" he said and then leaned in to kiss me. I kissed back, our tongues intertwined. His hand went under my shirt as my hand worked its way to his pants.
One thing led to another, and I haven't been that happy in years.
I woke up the next day on my bed. His arms draped on my stomach. I lovingly touched his arm. I took his hand and kissed it. He slowly stirred. His eyes fluttered open and smiled widely at me.
"Hey there, gorgeous" he said. I smiled and touched his face.
"Hey"
"You start work today?"
"Yup, and I prefer not to be late on my first day"
"Yeah, I have to go home and change"
"I have to get ready too." I said untangling myself from him. We got dressed and he went to Taylor's bed and gave her a kiss on the forehead. He walked up to me and hugged me tightly.
"What's going to happen now?" I asked into his chest. I've been dreading to ask the question, but I have to wake up to reality.
"Shhh, Addi, let's not talk about that. Let's just go with the flow as of now." He whispered. He lifted my head and kissed me on the lips. He let go and smiled at me. "I'll see you later?"
"Yeah, of course" I smiled and watched him leave.
Derek and I have been like that for days until we finally have to make the decision.
"Addison, stay here in Seattle" Derek said, lazily drawing circles on my stomach as we lay in bed.
"Derek, I can't pick up and leave just like that again."
"Please, Addison"
"How can we fit in your trailer?"
"I gave up the trailer months ago. I live in a house now on the same lot."
"Wow, you gave up that trailer?"
"Yeah, now please stay, Addi"
"Derek, I don't know. How about you move back to New York?"
"Addie, Seattle is my home now"
"And New York is mine" I said sadly. He sat up and looked at me.
"I can't lose you again. I can't lose you and Taylor" He said sincerely, almost begging.
"I don't know" I sat up next to him.
"Richard will give you your old job back. You'll move in with me, we can move on"
"Derek—"
"Don't you want to be with me?"
"Of course I do"
"Do you still love me?"
"Yes"
"Then stay"
"But Derek—"
"Don't you want Taylor to have a family, a mom and dad living together?"
"Of course I do"
"Addison, we could get married again, be together, forever. We've gone though our worst. We've been through adultery, and now, these past few days, I realized that I'm still in love with you. And now I know we can get past through anything. Please, Addison, I want us to start over."
I sat there, confused. I stared at him words aren't coming out.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. And then I opened it again and gazed into his eyes.
"Fine,we'll move here. It's not going to be easy you better make it worth it andwe better stay this way forever" I said and smiled.
He leaned in and kissed. It made me shiver. And now I know this is true.
I couldn't ask for something better than this.
END.
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