Midnight, The Amell Estate
The fire was dying. The hours had passed as if they were minutes.
"... and so, we could change the framework by allowing pain and aggression and narcissism and all that bad stuff to continue to be expressed, but in a safe way," she further explained her philosophy.
"I do not think there is a safe way to do that," Fenris said calmly.
"I think it can, if the people it is expressed to have the psychological and physical tools in order to deal with it," she said, passing him a bottle of whisky she found in the cabinet.
He nodded as a thanks. "The... psychological tools?"
"Yeah, like... knowing how to talk to someone in a bespoke way, knowing how to make a person process their own shit," she said, taking the bottle back. "We have the physical tools to scare, force and kill; we don't have the psychological tools," she said, drinking. "What good does it do if we punish force with force?"
Fenris' beautiful face, once alight by the roaring fire, was now fading into the darkness. She could tell by his voice however that the light inside was burning.
"Force should be used last, theoretically," he said. "I would also love it if I knew how to process my emotions," he said, drinking. "But how can that simple thing grow into 'equality' and peace between people?"
"Ah, fuck me," Hawke said as he gave her the bottle, and she just shoved it back on his lap.
He balanced his head in his arm and grabbed the neck of the bottle.
"I don't think fucking you is going to change Thedas, Hawke," Fenris said, rolling his eyes. He was wrong. He was just six to nine years away from knowing it.
"No, the fire—" Hawke said in annoyance. "Argh, I'm out of mana already?" she lamented, leaning back in the chair.
Fenris looked at her, and went to the fireplace. "There," he said, as he manually relit the fire. He stood back up.
Hawke took in the visage, and smiled to herself. "Thanks."
"You're welcome," he said calmly, going back to his chair. He stretched out the bottle to her. "You're really beating yourself up about it."
"Wouldn't you?" she said, drinking. "Imagine if I was in Tevinter with this whopping amount of talent."
Fenris broke into laughter as he took the bottle. "Oh, they would have eaten you alive, my dear," he said, grinning.
Her eyebrows pushed together and sloped upwards. "My dear?"
"My... friend?" he offered awkwardly. He pushed the bottle to his face but missed his mouth.
"Eh, I wouldn't go that far," she said, getting herself comfy.
Fenris took another sip instead of giving it back. "Even so, you needn't be harsh on yourself," he said. "As long as you know how to not get possessed, what does it matter if you're good at magic? You're already great at another thing. Your thing. You should be proud to stay true to yourself."
"Right on, brother," she said sarcastically, fist in the air.
Fenris chuckled.
Hawke felt mixed feelings. At first, she felt like reacting when he said the only good she was for is having proper "control" over herself. But then he had reminded her that he recognised her abilities and that it was good that she stayed true to herself. This bait and switch worried her, but she tried to give him the benefit of the doubt, for now.
"Are you ever going to pass the bottle?"
"Right."
Hawke took a sip, then hugged the bottle in her crossed lap. She still had those long pigtails with the bangs all in her eyes. She really needed to cut them shorter. How did she even see the battle field? They were kind of cute on her though, Fenris thought.
Then she burped.
"Charming," he grumbled.
She hic-upped. "Err, what were we talking about?" she said childishly.
"How to safely be an arsehole for equality," Fenris reminded her.
"Oh yeayeheyheyeah," Hawke said drunkenly, and stole another sip. "So, what if we can allow the pain/aggression/narcissism stuff to be expressed in a controlled environment, where you could play out your drama and really feel the feelings to their maximum without hurting yourself or other people," she proposed and started slashing the air in zig-zags drunkenly. She was sliding out of her chair. "Pleasure, pain, whatever—" she illustrated with the bottle, "to allow it, to feel it, to understand it, like fully understand it!" she said. She pointed to her heart cheesily and mouthed, "In here." Fenris rolled his eyes. She went on, "Aren't we all usually too terrified to ever carry those feelings through? I mean, isn't that how we grow? I wanna grow...!" she said passionately, spilling whisky.
Fenris listened, cheek in hand, and thought this would have been very wholesome, had she not used BDSM as a reference for her political ideology. She seemed serious, too.
"Alright, as long as I don't actually have to have sex with people to bring the New World to Thedas," Fenris said sarcastically in a tired voice, "Why not? I'm all for an experiment."
She held on to the chair as she was falling out of it again. "You like sexless experiments? You're like a... a scientist."
"I'm really not," Fenris said, shaking his head against his fist.
"You're like a sexless bird scientist," she reiterated enthusiastically, climbing back into her chair.
He chuckled uncomfortably.
"So, a sexless ornithologist," he said. "Although, isn't that just repeating yourself?"
"Oh yeah, what do those people do? Like, just sit around a forest birdwatching and doodling in a notebook."
"So I imagine," he said.
"Ah, she would have looooooved you!" Hawke cried enthusiastically.
"Who?" he said.
Her wide smile shrunk and she stared into empty space for a second. "M-my sister."
"Ah, just as well," Fenris said, smirking. "I think that would have made you feel jealous."
Hawke frowned, then broke into laughter. "Would not!" What was he doing? She couldn't feel her face, and she was sweating.
"No?" Fenris said, fist over his mouth.
"No!" Hawke said, cringing. She scratched her head a little too hard. "No," she scoffed, "I'm not attracted to you." Lying was hard when all your senses were intermingling. Her ear felt itchy. Why was everything so itchy?
Well, he had enough psychological skills to notice... that, Fenris thought. He smirked to himself, and decided to stop torturing her. "Okay, then," he said calmly.
"You know who is attractive?" Hawke started childishly.
Please don't say Anders, Fenris thought, grinding his teeth.
"Aveline," Hawke said, nodding and grinning. "Yeah, I had a little crush on her when we first met."
"Oh, what happened?" Fenris said, rolling his eyes.
"Well, her husband was dead and... she's straight," Hawke said, pouting and drinking. "I'm over it, though. The Guard revealed a controlling side of her. Me? I have wings," she said, drunkenly illustrating her wings.
"Exactly how much freedom do you need?" Fenris asked curiously.
"Oh, no," she said, waving sluggishly, "not like polygamy and shit. But you don't tell Hawke what to do," she said and pointed to her head. "The voices in my head tell me what to do, and I don't even listen to them." For some reason she laughed at her own joke.
"Voices? Plural?" he said with half-lidded eyes.
"Yeah, don't you have different voices that give you different thoughts?" she said. Her smile turned into worry. "No? Just me?"
Fenris thought about it, which surprised even himself. "I think I have an 11-year-old in me."
"What? Who did you eat?" she asked in alarm, then stopped to think, and chuckled. "Oh, like an inner child."
"Yours seems to have effectively taken over," Fenris said, watching her calmly.
"Oh, I love it when she takes over!" she said, spilling more whisky. She looked down at it, and ignored it. "Anyway, I love it when she's in charge! Wherever I may be, a room or a battlefield, it's like 'Welcome to the Fun House!'"
"Ah, there she is. Hello, Clown Girl!" he said sarcastically and waved.
"Alright, then, what do I call yours?" she said, chuckling.
Fenris scoffed, all confident. "Bird Boy, of course."
Hawke chuckled lively. "I like Bird Boy. He's cheeky!"
"Speaking of cheeks, I cannot feel mine," Fenris said, taking his hand away from it.
"I can't feel my face," Hawke said in a stationary wobble. "Take me home?"
Fenris tried to stand up. He scratched his head, and waited for the dizziness to settle. Then he offered her his hand.
"I thought you didn't like touching," Hawke said, confused.
"Oh, right," Fenris said, looking dizzily around. "Where are even my gauntlets?" He looked up with his index finger. "Where... are... my gauntlets... even?"
Hawke peered over. "Under your armchair."
"It's not my armchair. We're not married yet," Fenris said sarcastically.
Hawke crossed her arms and smirked hard as he awkwardly went on his knees to fish the gauntlets out.
"If we are though," she mused, and looked up at him as he equipped the gauntlets. "You need to at least give me cuddles."
"Cuddles with Clown Girl?" he mused, fastening the belts. "Tempting. How about a hand for now?" he said, and offered it.
"An armoured hand," she corrected, taking his hand to get up.
"Hey, I am not an easy man," Fenris said vainly, grin on his face.
She put on her coat and contained a giggle that escaped through her nose. No, he had boundaries as strong as a fortress, alright.
Morning, Lowtown
"Only a week away!" Hawke said, pertaining to the expedition.
"Maker, I can't wait," Carver said enthusiastically. "Have you decided who we're taking?"
"Well, Isabela's out 'cause she's on meds for the next month. Guard-Captain Aveline is now also out," she said grumpily. "Do you want to come?" she teased.
Carver looked like he had a minor heart attack.
"I was kidding," she said, and pat him on the back. "You've worked super hard to get this show on the road. I'm proud of you, man."
"Thanks, sis," he said, a bit surprised. "And hey, I'm sorry I couldn't do more with Athenril."
"I bet you are," she said.
"I meant to get you out of the magic stuff. I really tried," he said.
Hawke stuck her hands in her pockets. "Hey, man, you did what you could... and wanted to."
"Twice," he said proudly.
"Don't push it," she said, rolling her eyes. "Shall we go in?"
"Ah, I hope Izzy's feeling better by now," he said, pumping his chest out.
"Do you think about anything other than sex?" she said.
Carver thought about it. "I think about food and stuff."
"Aww," she said, and pet his hair. "You're a simple man, aren't you?"
"Well, excuse me, Mrs Fancy Pants," Carver protested.
"Mx Fancy Pants," Hawke corrected.
"The fuck is a mix?" he asked.
"It's a gender-neutral title," she said.
"What's wrong with 'Miss', if you're so bothered by the," he said, and cleared his throat, "patriarchal language of our day to day lives that ingrain in us a sense that women are property?"
"There's nothing wrong with 'Miss'," she said, shrugging nonchalantly. "I wanna be Mx."
"You know Mx Hawke sounds like a mixed-race child," he said.
She looked at him. "You got a problem with that, too?"
"No, no," he said, "I'm preparing for it in fact, what with you dating that elf."
"Not dating anyone, Carver," she said, annoyed.
He was loving this. "If you're not dating, then why did I see him drop you off last night and holding hands on the porch?"
"Okay, first of all, he dropped me off because I was drunk."
"Right..."
"Second of all, we were holding gauntlets."
"Mhm."
"And third of all... we were doing it ironically."
Carver guffawed. "Holy shit, you're like two nerds."
Hawke sneered. Then she thought of the potential embarrassment and prodding. "Say anything to anyone, and you can stay home with mommy."
He crossed his arms, smirking. "I thought there was nothing to tell."
"There isn't! Shut up," she said.
They were almost at The Hanged Man.
"You know what? I'll be a very good secret-keeping brother if you throw in two sovereigns."
"Money extorsion? On your own family? Really, Carver?"
"Hey, I'm not the moral one in the family."
"Well, Bethany was the moral one. So, what does that make me?"
Carver thought about it. "The one who gets caught a lot," he said, smirking. "So, better pay up if you want to keep your little nerd boyfriend a secret," he said, holding out the flat of his hand.
Hawke pursed her lips in extreme annoyance. "Fine," she said, and started counting coins.
"Pleasure doing business with you," he said cockily. "And by the way, didn't you like, seriously hate that guy?"
Hawke crossed her arms. "I did. Turns out there's a fine line between love and hate, and that line," she said grimly, "is a sexy voice."
"He doesn't have a sexy voice," Carver protested, cringing.
"Oh, pfft, yeah," she scoffed, and poked his chest. "Ask anyone else. I dare you."
"Whatever," he said. "Are you coming in, or are you waiting for your fasci boyfriend to suck face before everyone sees you?"
"Suck face? What are you, twelve?" she said judgmentally.
"Aww," he teased sadistically. "Did you pinky-swear to hold hands forever like two good Andrastians?"
"Actually, I'm taking your own advice, bro," she said. "I understand now the whole patience and courting thing."
"Patience and courting?" Carver said condescendingly. "At that rate, you're gonna have sex in like three years."
"Well, if that's how long he needs, then," she said, putting her foot down, but then started mumbling, "then, I'm gonna need more advice."
"Are you sure he isn't just gay?" he said, very amused.
Hawke thought about it. "We'll see when he meets Izzy."
"Oh, no, he won't! I called dibs," he said, pointing at her.
"Okay, calm down, Maferath," she said sarcastically. "And don't call dibs on people. It's gross."
"Okay, Mx Fancy Gender-Neutral Pants," he said mockingly. "You know what, I think you are the moralist one."
"Well," she said, looking at his newly bigger coin purse, "someone has to be."
She was about to go in, but Carver thought of something.
"Alright, so I'm not fancy, I just want my own hustle. Mother wants to make us fancy nobles. What do you want to do with the expedition money, you know, besides family stuff?"
She came into his face. "I'm gonna weaken feudalism at its core and emancipate the serving class."
Carver looked scared. "Sweet Andraste, they're gonna hang you in the street like a dog."
"They can try," she said, and went inside.
Morning, The Hanged Man
"What is up, girls?" Hawke said as she came by Isabela and Merrill's table. "Where's Varric?"
"Hey, Izzy, how you doing?" Carver butted in, putting on the charms. "Who's your friend?"
"I'm Merrill," she said, sipping from her straw. "Are you another of Hawke's team?"
"Oh, not just any other. I'm the brother," he said, his eyebrows jumping flirtatiously. Hawke rolled her eyes. Now he was happy to be 'the brother'. "Carver," he said, holding out his hand.
Merrill looked at it, confused, and sideways high-fived him.
Carver chuckled. "You're cute, Merrill."
"Thanks? I think..." Merrill said.
"Alright, alright, where's Varric?" Hawke butted in.
"He had a rough night," Isabela said, looking through her cards nonchalantly, then put them down. "I don't know why though."
"I think I do," Hawke said, feeling guilty. She had been avoiding him. Well, she had been avoiding everyone, but he was the one who gave a damn. "I need to go talk to him."
"Heh-hey, Mr Fister," Carver went mockingly,
"I am here to make the dwarf cry," Fenris' voice came from behind.
Ah, fuck. She couldn't go to Varric straight away. Why not? Because a part of her stabbed her chest with anxiety that she had a maneater to monitor. A non-mage, badass, slutty woman he'd just love, wouldn't he? Everyone did. It was like men themselves willed her form into existence. Although if she ever had stories written about her, she would have been white-washed as fuck.
Ugh, just stay for the first exchange, she thought. Sus out the initial vibe. It's fine.
She turned around. Fenris gave a nod and a little smile.
"Can you be more specific?" Hawke said, smiling back. "It could mean so many things with you."
"Wicked Grace," Fenris said flatly.
Isabela whistled and pointed at her table. "Here."
Fenris scowled for a moment, but then said, "Excellent," and took a seat in front of the girls and next to Carver.
Hawke remained standing, not sure what to do with her life. Comfort a friend? Play sexual politics? The choices were tough, indeed. Although... He could still be sleeping if he had a rough night. She shouldn't wake him up. Not that that ever stopped her... before... She scratched at the back of her neck. Just sit the fuck down, bitch, a voice inside told her.
She took a seat at the head of the table. "Alright, let's play."
"Have you talked to him, Hawke?" Fenris said, taking his cards.
"He's, uh, still sleeping," she said.
"So, what happened here?" Isabela said, amused.
"She's been naughty," Fenris said, grinning to himself.
"Naughty?" Isabela said, her eyes flickering at her. "Please elaborate?"
This put her in such an awkward position. She hated Fenris again. He made it so easy...
"I, uh," she said, and coughed. "I've been a little MIA."
"Oh. I didn't notice," Isabela said.
"That's 'cause you've been down with... what was it again?" Hawke said.
Aveline came in with Anders. Fenris felt like he was having a deja-vu.
Isabela sneered at her. "I had a stomach bug."
"No, you didn't, you had a crotch bug," Aveline said bluntly behind her.
Isabela looked up and gave Anders a murderous look.
"I didn't tell her!" Anders said.
"He really didn't. Until just now," Aveline said, smirking and sitting down next to her, pushing her cockily.
Anders felt very uncomfortable, and decided to buy her an apologetic drink.
"Speaking of crotches, does the carpet match the drapes?" Isabela fired back. "You're next, Mr Fister."
Great, he had to convince more people to stop calling him that. And his crotch was his own business, Fenris thought.
"Ok, ok, change of subject," Hawke said in annoyance.
"I might be able to open up the clinic again," Anders said as he came back. He looked at Fenris and Carver, and circled around to sit next to the less problematic one.
"That's good news. I'm glad," Hawke said.
"You have a clinic, Anders?" Merrill said.
"Yes, in Darktown," he said, then thought about it. "I'm not sure I want you there, though."
"Just poor people and whores, then?" Aveline said rudely.
"Oh, learn to share, poor person," Isabela shot back.
Hawke rubbed her forehead. "So, Aveline, how's being Captain?"
"Ugh," Aveline growled, letting her pint hit the table. "It's not going. They've got me in all this training."
"Oh, like leadership training?" Hawke asked.
Aveline scoffed. "Not even close." Her eyes rolled. "Paper peddling. Simple math. Social etiquette. Writing,"she said in outrage. "These people actually think Fereldans are illiterate."
Isabela guffawed with delight.
"Well, I've known some who are," Carver said.
Hawke, Aveline and Anders looked at him.
"Every place has illiterate people, Carver. This is just a harmful stereotype," Aveline said.
"Yeah, like every Rivaini is a drug dealer," Isabela said. "Or what was that one about elves?"
"Frolicking?" Hawke offered. "Do you frolic, guys?" she said towards the elves.
"No," Fenris said, crossing his arms.
"Of course," Merrill said innocently.
Fenris shot her an unhappy look.
She coughed uncomfortably. "Not in the woods, though."
"I don't frolic anywhere," he said curtly.
Anders seemed very warm and happy. "Ah, racism," he said sarcastically.
"And humans, too," Carver said. "What was that one about humans? That they don't wash their teeth?"
"Ah, pause game," Fenris said, sneering. "You can't cry racism as a human at this table."
"Why not? They're the same stereotypes," Carver said.
"Because you're masters of everything, almost everywhere," Fenris said. "You want to complain about that? Go over to Marchers' table where they complain they're being replaced."
Hawke's eyebrows rose in surprise. "You do have levels, don't you?" she said, impressed.
"That's right," Fenris said, arms still crossed. "I've got other pet-peeves."
"Boy, you just know this guy has a whole list," Carver said, taking his drink by mistake.
"Just one other," Fenris said, grabbing Carver's arm with his claw. "Human males, especially, who think they can just take anything they want," he said and took his pint back.
Oh, sweet Maker, she was in love!
"I need the loo," Fenris said and stood up. "Now, who do I trust?" He looked around. No one here looked trustworthy. "I suppose you will have to do," he said to Hawke. "Please guard my cards."
Hawke pursed her lips. "Sure."
As Fenris left the table, Isabela mouthed silently to Hawke, "Nice."
Hawke looked at Carver and smirked.
Carver frowned. "Does he have a sexy voice?" he whispered to Anders awkwardly.
"Who? The pig-lover?" Anders said, watching Fenris leave. "Yeah, he does, but the words coming out of it manage to keep me in a nice, constant state of disgust."
On the corridor, Fenris ran into Varric, who was startled.
"Maker, you always make me jump," he said.
He came closer. "So I've been told." He looked behind. "I forgot to tell you. I found Hawke."
"You did?" he said. "Where?"
"Ask her," he replied. "It's really not that exciting."
"Oh, okay," the dwarf sighed in relief. "Why did you forget to tell me?"
"Because she got me drunk last night," the elf replied without thinking.
Varric's eyes flickered with curiosity. "Oh?"
"It was... also not very exciting," Fenris said, scratching the back of his head.
"Mhm, sure," Varric said sarcastically.
They walked down to the main floor.
"Damn, the whole party is here!" Varric said to everyone. "Are we chaining ourselves to something in protest or what?"
Hawke's eyes became big. "Yes. We can go to the Gallows and completely vandalise—"
"Not even gonna hear the rest of that," Varric said as he held out his palm. He took a seat at the tail of the table.
"Yeah, I really wouldn't recommend any of that," Anders said, worried.
"But that would so teach them—"
Anders interrupted her. "That would only get Circle mages in trouble, Hawke. There is no reasonable way that the Templars would believe the locals care about the mages."
"Fine, if we can't destroy the chains, then I guess we can chain ourselves to them. That way they can see who's doing it."
"Chuckles, please, wait to be nobility, then do crazy shit like that, okay?" Varric said fatherly.
"I'm going to get a drink," Fenris mumbled and left for the bar. He probably did not want to incriminate himself.
Isabela waited three seconds, then went to join him.
Hawke stared for a second too much.
"You alright, Pantaloons?" Varric said, calmly eyeing her.
"Not really," Hawke said rapidly, "Say, you wanna catch up?" she said and beckoned towards the bar.
"Yeah," Varric said, contained, and joined her on the way.
They ordered their stuff. Hawke was back-to-back with Fenris. They ignored each other.
"So, I've needed a few days alone," she said.
"Nothing wrong with that, Chuckles," he said. "Just, I don't know, leave me a note with the location next time, just for fun."
"Yeah, I really should," Hawke said, thinking about it. She had a habit of getting into trouble when she was alone.
Varric accepted that. "Anyway, I sold our last few loots to the dwarves and I'm this close to convincing Blondie to come—"
"Does it ever... come off?" Isabela's voice came from behind.
Hawke's eyes doubled.
"It's been... known to happen," came Fenris' voice right behind her.
Hawke squinted. Hard.
"Chuckles? Hey, Chuckles, are you—" Varric called.
"Yes," Hawke said, enunciating. She looked at Varric. His eyebrow was risen. "You've... sold Anders to the dwarves." That didn't sound right. She closed her eyes and grimaced.
Varric squinted, looked to their side, came back, and kept the squint going.
"Ok, we're going to talk about this later," he said, almost judgmentally. He took his drink and left.
"Did you sort it with Varric?" Isabela said towards her.
Hawke turned around and came next to Fenris.
"Yeah, we're good. We're great,"she said and Fenris made eye contact. They awkwardly looked away from each other. "Okay," she said sprightly. "Let's recommence. I wanna make Fenris cry."
He said in a slow, monotone voice, "Oh, dear, I am so scared." Then he realised something. "Wait, isn't our game still going?"
"No, you won," she said calmly.
"I won," he said, as if she were crazy. "I won while I was at the bathroom?"
"Yeah, your cards won," she said.
"While I was at the bathroom," he insisted sourly.
Hawke sighed and whined. "You were taking a long time, okay? I got bored. I played on your behalf. I didn't fuck with the cards. They were already good!"
"You know, I can guard your cards next time..." Isabela said, leaning flirtatiously.
Fenris looked at her. "Hard no," he said. "Hawke may have a small attention span, but you have a small conscience. I wouldn't trust you with a fallen hair."
Isabela pretended to be hurt and left.
"Oof," Hawke said sarcastically. "And he loves his hair."
Fenris turned to her. "And as for you—"
"Not even glance at your cards again?" she said grumpily.
"Smart girl," he said flatly, and left.
"Am I though?" she mumbled to herself.
As Fenris went back, Carver left for the bar. Fenris looked at the winning cards Hawke had left him, and they really were the same.
"You're keeping quite the straight face," her brother teased her.
"I don't like this!" she said to him anxiously. "I don't like all these sexual politics. It's too stressful. I have better things to think about! I'm gonna call my dogs off."
"What are you talking about?" he said, a little outraged, hitting her on the arm. "You gotta keep it up! Hawkes are strong and they don't quit! If you quit, you will do a disservice to our family. Are you prepared to besmirch our name?"
She looked at him. "Wow, you really want to fuck her, don't you?"
"Quite a bit, yeah," he said, contained.
"Well, from what I've seen," she said grumpily, crossing her arms. "If you talk to her friend, she might get mad."
"Ah, the friend angle, of course!" he said and hit her in the arm again. "Thanks for the tip."
"No, no, no, that's not okay. I was just ranting. That wasn't advice, Carver!" she said in alarm.
"Too late," he said childishly.
Hawke rubbed her forehead. "I wanna go to work," she whined.
"No, you wanna stay and play the game. Confidently," he insisted. Then he offered his palms. "What happened to you? What happened to my bitch sister who used to steal my girlfriends?"
"Aha!" she said childishly. "So, you do admit—"
"Not the important thing right now, dumbo," he said. She really looked tortured. "Wow, Andrei really did a number on you."
"Yeah," she said dejectedly.
He put his arm around her. "Alright, alright, let's focus on the present. You have a guy to impress—"
"I don't need to impress shit!" Hawke reacted.
Carver rolled his eyes. "Okay, fine, you have a man to hunt—"
"He's not an animal, Carver."
"Well then what do you have? A soul to mate with?"
"Ew," she said. "But we're closer to that than to the old-timey crap from before."
"Ok, let's be simple. You have a man."
"I don't have him. He's not property. It's not right when it's in reverse, either. Especially in his case!"
Carver massaged his forehead for a few seconds. "Okay... There... is a man," he said, containing his frustration.
She seemed to finally agree.
"You just gotta act aloof. Men like a challenge. Let him pursue you, if he's interested. I mean, from what I saw, he makes no eye contact with people, but he sure seemed enchanted by yours last night."
Hawke looked grossed out by the whole thing. "Nah, not my thing, Carver."
"Well, what is your thing then?" he asked, annoyed. "You just hang around, waiting to get other people's leftovers?"
"You know, did you ever think that the way you refer to women had played a part in them leaving your ass?"
"You're just incriminating yourself further."
Hawke sighed. "Alright, I didn't 'hang around' in wait. I actively pursued them, just away from homophobic eyes."
"Oh, Maker, you played the knight in shining armour," Carver said, laughing. "You were all, 'Leave that guy, princess. Look at me; I'm tough and beautiful. I'll make you feel like a queen' bullshit."
"Well," Hawke said, smirking hard. "They came like queens."
Carver rolled his eyes. "Well, it ain't gonna work on him."
"Why not?" she said.
"What?" he said, unconvinced. "Is that how you got Andrei?"
Hawke looked amused. "Him? I whistled; he came running."
"See?" Carver said. "You can't treat him like a little prince. Men don't like that shit."
"Hey, I didn't say anything about treating people like heirs to the crown. I'm saying, if I like you, I'll go after you."
"So you're Isabela, just more guyish."
Hawke looked down at herself. Oversized sweaters, multiple belts, gauntlets, combat boots.
"Oh, come on, you place anyone to the left of Isabela and they look butch."
"Which reminds me," Carver said suspiciously. "Why haven't you two... or are you waiting for me to get her, so it's like old times?"
Hawke shook her head. "No, man, you go for it. I'm not interested in party girls. I dance on my own table."
"No, you like nerds, don't you?" he teased, glancing behind him. Fenris was sorting the cards by colour.
"This is giving me a headache. Are we done?" she said tiredly, gulping the rest of her drink.
"You know what your problem is? You're in your head," Carver said. "You're overthinking every little thing about this. You're so goddamn in your head, you are paralysed by indecision."
"Yes. Yes, that sounds like me,"Hawke said enthusiastically.
"Well, knock it off!" Carver half-shouted. "You gotta stop thinking. You gotta act in the moment. Like a teenager."
"Teenagers make very bad decisions, Carver."
"So, make bad decisions, for Andraste's sake! Adults make them all the time! I'd take that any day over..." he said and wiped the air in front of Hawke, "whatever you're doing right now."
"Taking advice from you would count as a bad decision."
"Great. A perfect start."
Hawke rolled her eyes, her shoulders sunken. "I miss Bethany," she said, and sighed.
"Alright, you want me to be Bethany?" he said, and put the back of his hands like wings under his chin. "I think you should follow your heart and get married and have little mage babies!" he said in a high-pitched voice.
"Don't mock her," she growled.
"Well, look who turned around quickly on that," he said accusatorily.
"Well, I can't argue with her now, can I?" she half-shouted, and tried to calm herself. "And besides, she was in love. People should be in love. Marry forlove and all that shit. What did we do, huh?"
Carver grimaced. "Yeah, alright."
Hawke pet his hair. "Anyway," she said. "I'll think about it."
"No, don't think—"
"Hey, time's up for telling me what to do!"
"Alright. That'll be 30 silvers," Carver said and held out his palm.
"Fuck off," Hawke said, and left.
Noon, Lowton
Despite Carver's gross ways of doing... anything, Hawke was feeling generous today. They had quite a lot of work scheduled in overlap, so she needed to delegate. If he wanted his own 'hustle', then she had better inspire him to do so. Or shut him up, at the very least.
"Alright, people, we've got five missions today," Hawke said, notepad in hand. "Two of them start in half an hour, another two need to be done by the end of the afternoon, and we've got an evening job. We reconvene between these in Hightown Market, and the team that's had the easiest time will pick up the evening job, or we'll mix as the case may be." She beckoned to Carver. "You'll lead the second team."
"Yes, please!" Carver said enthusiastically. "Alright, I pick—"
"Nah, you don't get to pick," Hawke interrupted him, chewing her pen. "I need Aveline for my jobs as they're more... establishment, and I would prefer if Anders came with us," she said, and squinted insecurely, "but if you'd rather not be around Templars, I understand."
"I have no qualms with standing up to Templars," Anders said.
"You might need to help them, is the thing—" Hawke said.
"Then they'll remember a helpful face," he said, smiling. Justice must have been sleeping hard. Very good.
She nodded in agreement, and went back to the notepad. "Alright. Carver, you've got Lowton and Darktown, so Isabela is a must," she said. Izzy stepped out proudly. "And Varric, you're with them, 'cause, you know..."
"I don't need a babysitter," Carver insisted.
"Who says I'm babysitting you?" Varric said, and looked at Isabela. They shared secret looks.
"If you're on nanny duty, then you might as well take Merrill and show her around the city," Hawke said.
"Oh, I'd love that!" Merrill said. Varric was already making a list of landmarks in his head. He loved showing off Kirkwall to new people.
"So, that leaves me with..." Hawke said, back to her notepad.
"Me," Fenris said grumpily, crossing his arms.
No one liked being picked last. Not even him.
"Cheer up, Fenris," Anders said, smiling. "You're in the Dream Team now."
"Dream Team?" Carver said condescendingly and flexed. "We're the Badass Team! Eh, guys?"
Fenris grimaced hard. He couldn't stand a whole day of that. "Hawke, may I please be in your team forever?" he said.
"Nah, we're not married yet," Hawke reminded him.
"I'm sorry, do I need to go shopping or something?" Aveline intervened, worried.
"For a funeral, maybe," Fenris said, unhappy.
"It's just an inside joke," Hawke said to Aveline. "I find the concept of marriage degrading and shallow."
Aveline crossed her arms. "Really?"
Noon, The Blooming Rose
"... and not to mention how it sanctifies marital rape and violence against women," Hawke went on as they came up looking for Idunna the Exotic Wonder of the East.
"Not every marriage needs to be a domestic shit show," Aveline protested.
"Well, yeah, you can defend yourself. No man's gonna try that shit on you," Hawke fired back.
"Not all men are violent predators," Aveline said, annoyed.
"Thank you," Anders said.
Fenris wasn't very convinced. It didn't take a dick to be a predator, but a demon in your brain surely did the trick.
"Don't thank me just yet," Aveline said. "If you saw the pile of domestic abuse reports on my desk, you'd be worried too. A quarter of them come from the workers here."
"Yeah, sex workers get beaten up like punching bags," Hawke said.
"Old news," Anders said. "It just takes a man with old-time ideas and a lot of insecurities. Wants to feel powerful, so takes it out on the weak. Most mages in my Circle who got in trouble were women. And let me tell you—"
"They did nothing wrong?" Fenris said condescendingly.
"Oh, shut up," Anders fired back. "You have no fucking idea what you're talking about. See how you'd feel if you had to trade your body in exchange for not becoming Tranquil at your Harrowing."
Fenris looked disturbed, and didn't want to continue the conversation.
"That's disgusting," Aveline said.
"That was textbook," Anders said. "Those girls didn't do shit. Me? I skated by for a decade breaking all the rules I could find."
"Oh? You were a clown mage, too?" Hawke teased, looking at Fenris. He was still brooding unhappily. Probably re-editing his arguments for the next debate.
The truth was, Fenris locked up because he was no stranger to abuse, and he worked really hard at forgetting those things. People talking about it so casually upset him, especially Anders, who just loved presuming things about him. Besides... it wasn't like these clowns could have fathomed men could be victims too.
"The clowniest," Anders said proudly. "Justice really tempered me."
They got to Idunna's door. "Well, there's me sworn forever against merging with spirits," Hawke said, and knocked.
As Hawke broke off the blood magic spell, Idunna came down on her knees in peace. She confessed to her wrongdoing and the larger conspiracy surprisingly quick.
Aveline prepared to cuff her, but Hawke lost it for some reason, and, very hypocritically, punched the sex worker.
"Take this bitch to the Templars," she said unempathetically, which upset Aveline and Anders for different reasons.
Fenris crossed his arms and smiled, saying nothing.
Noon, The Gallows
"I'm sorry, Keran, but we cannot take any risks. I have to relieve you of your duty, effective immediately."
"Are you fucking kidding me?" Hawke said, stepping in.
"Watch. Your. Mouth. Here," Aveline whispered.
She ignored her. "You do this to your Templars?"
"Not that it's any of your business, civilian," Cullen said defensively. "Keran's a young man. I'm sure he'll find something better in no time."
The young man disagreed, and explained his financial predicament.
"Not that it's any of your business, Templar, but I was in the Ferelden army, and we don't fire our people for being victims!" she said angrily. "Aren't you Fereldan, too?"
"I most certainly am, but this is not the Fereldan army," Cullen said. "And every Templar Order has different rules, as it turns out. In the Ferelden Circle we might as well have been servants to the mages."
"So, you were there, then, when the Circle was overtaken?" Hawke said, squinting. "Didn't you fall victim, too?"
Cullen looked anxious. "W-we all did, but that is neither here nor there."
"Well, how come you're not without a job?" Hawke pressed. "No, you were probably on someone's good side and they transferred you here, right? Got yourself a monstrous promotion, too."
"What are you implying, miss?" Cullen said, unhappy.
"If I may interrupt," Anders said innocently. "We attacked Keran, to see if a demon came out. But nothing happened."
"Yeah, I can punch him again, if you want," Hawke said, covering for Anders.
"That won't be necessary," Cullen said nervously. "You feel very strongly about this. I will keep Keran in the Order, but you will be monitored for ten years and during that time, you cannot get promoted," he said to the young man.
"Pigs," Hawke said, scoffing.
"We'll see ourselves out," Aveline said, taking her away.
Afternoon, Hightown Market
Fenris and Anders were very tired, and slouched on the steps defeated.
Hawke and Aveline shook their heads. "Men," they said, and went to deliver the news of Ninnette's death themselves.
"Are we really that bad?" Anders asked Fenris.
"No," Fenris said, massaging his neck.
"I just didn't realise there'd be so much running with Hawke," Anders went on. He looked at him. "Aren't you supposed to be really fit?"
Fenris massaged his leg and ignored him for a time. "I'm having some pain issues," he finally said.
"What kind of pain?" Anders asked. He didn't really want to help, but it was his job.
"None of your business, mage," Fenris said.
"I don't really care, to be honest, but if it's affecting the team—"
"It is not," Fenris said sourly, going for the other leg. "I have the most kills out of all of you."
Anders rolled his eyes. "Excuse me, Mr Lethal Weapon," he said mockingly.
"You know, we don't have to talk," Fenris said. "In fact, don't touch me, don't heal me, don't even regard my existence, and we'll both be happier."
"Jeez, Tevinter was that bad?" Anders said.
"Not for you," Fenris said, massaging his arm. "Apprentice to the right master, you would do well."
"And they all do blood magic?" Anders said, unconvinced.
"Only the ones who don't complain about how powerless and persecuted they are," Fenris said sarcastically, massaging his feet.
"So, widespread pain," Anders said, ignoring his comment. "Is it the markings?"
Fenris stood up and left. When he looked up, he saw Hawke's fists holding Ghyslain's collar, suspending him against the outer balcony. Aveline held back the noble's guard.
"Say you're sorry!" Hawke said to the Orlesian.
"I'm... I'm sorry!" Ghyslain said, terrified.
Hawke pulled him up. "There, that wasn't so hard, was it?"
"Off you go," Aveline said. They ran down the stairs, startling Anders.
"What was that about?" Anders asked.
Hawke jumped down the stairs. "Nothing to see here. Just police brutality."
Aveline came and hit Hawke over the back of the head. "Shut up," she said angrily. "You have to cool it down with the violence."
"I regret nothing," Hawke said, drinking some water. She sat like a man, spreading.
Fenris walked back to them. "Someone else upset you, Hawke?"
"Yeah," she said. "Do you have any more water?"
He gave her some. "I get the ire against the controlling blood mage, but what did that little man do?"
"He was a weasel," she said. "Didn't even care about his wife dying. He was broken up about the money."
"You can't let your personal issues take over your work, Hawke," Aveline scolded her.
"What? Am I bad leader? I split everything even with you guys," she said defensively.
"That's not the issue, Hawke. You just really don't know when to shut up. I mean, you could have really outed yourself with the Knight-Captain back there."
"Agreed," Fenris said in a disappointed tone. Great, mommy and daddy are all upset. What else was new?
"Sorry, but I agree, too," Anders said. "This is really dangerous for you. You've got to be more careful when speaking to them."
"I was just worked up about their employment practices," Hawke protested, and relived the moment. "Fucking prissy boy," she grumbled, drinking out of Fenris' flask.
"I'll see if the Guard has anger management training," Aveline said. "You must believe they do. And save the lecture, Hawke."
"Okay," Hawke said, pouting and drinking.
"You drank all of it?" Fenris said, annoyed.
"Oh... sorry," she said. "There's a water fountain on the other side. I'll refill both," she said, and left.
"I don't like this," Aveline said to the guys.
"You're too overprotective," Anders said. "So, she gets worked up about stuff. Who doesn't? She can handle the heat."
Aveline shook her head. "Who's going with her in the expedition? Someone needs to look after her."
Anders shrugged. Fenris sighed. "Fine," he said.
"You're going?" Aveline said, surprised.
"Is that so hard to believe?" Fenris said.
"Yes," Anders said flatly.
"Hey-hey," Carver's voice came from the stairs to Lowtown.
"I'm going to get some lunch," Fenris said, ready to leave the annoying situation. He stopped himself midway. "Does... anyone want anything?" But it was too late. Carver's team heard him.
He ended up with more orders than he could remember. Great. Never be nice again, Fenris, he thought.
"How'd you do?" Hawke said, coming back with full flasks.
"Catch," Carver said, throwing a fat coin purse.
"Whoa," she said. "Nice job."
"Told ya," he said.
"Alright, well, have a nice break, and when you're done, I got another job for you," Hawke said, handing him the flyer for the rescue of the Viscount's son.
"Holy shit," Carver said, beckoning his team to look. "This will set us hard and good."
"The Viscount's son?" Isabela said, looming over his head. "Caching."
Carver leaned his head back and looked up. "This is the best hat ever."
Isabela laughed and messed up his hair.
"Where's Fenris?" Hawke said.
"He's getting us lunch," Anders said, smirking.
"What did you order for me?" Hawke asked.
"Oh... uh." They looked at each other.
"Mhm; thanks guys," she said grumpily, and went looking after him.
"'Sup?" Hawke said, startling Fenris, who was waiting awkwardly with a note next to the street food stand.
"Did I forget your order?" he said tiredly.
"No, bastards forgot to order for me," she said. "Wait a second."
"It'll be more than a second. I think I ordered their whole selection," Fenris said, rolling his eyes.
Four minutes passed. She came back with a snack to share as the waited. "How'd you get that?" he said.
"I'm charming," she said, shrugging, and gave him some of her berries. "Hey, thanks for doing this, by the way. It was really sweet of you."
Fenris raised an eyebrow and received them. "It really wasn't. They just overheard me when I asked Aveline."
Hawke chuckled. "Still, even just for Aveline, that was nice of you. And, uh, sorry for my outbursts."
"They weren't directed at me," Fenris said nonchalantly.
"I know, right?" Hawke said in amusement with her mouth full.
"I'm surprised at the anger against blood mages, though," he said, eating cleanly. "I figured you'd find a justified spot for them in your little ideology."
"Only the ones who are forced to do it in the face of absolute certain death," she said, throwing berries up in the air to catch. "That bitch, though. She had it coming."
"What about Merrill, then?" Fenris said, crossing his arms.
She missed the berry again and it went down her nose. She tried to sneeze out in her hand.
"She got an earful the other day, don't you worry," Hawke said, eating the nose berry.
Fenris grimaced. "Is that how Fereldan soldiers eat?"
"No, it's how I eat," Hawke said nonchalantly, throwing another berry. "With no care in the world."
"Yes, of course, the wings," Fenris said, illustrating wings mockingly.
"You should try it sometime," she said, smirking and eating.
Fenris looked at the ground and counted five smooshed berries. "No, thank you."
"Have you no outlet?" she protested, amused.
"You're my outlet," Fenris said flatly, and went past her to check on the cook.
"Me?" Hawke said nervously, turning around.
"Yes, killing people who deserve it," he said, taking two bags of food.
"Right," she said, a little worried. "Didn't you hear your number being called?"
Fenris' eyebrows went up and he looked at his note nervously. "I can't make up his hand-writing," he said, and left.
Sunset, On the way back to Kirkwall
"What were you thinking?" Fenris said scoldingly.
"What?" Hawke said.
"You covered for the blood mages and let them go," he said.
"Those weren't blood mages," Anders said tiredly.
"You stay out of this," Fenris growled.
Hawke sighed. "Look, if we were in Ferelden, I might have had a big dilemma. But you heard how Karas talked about the mages. His cock was up in his pants getting ready to execute them. It's just not right."
"You gave them our supplies, too," he said angrily.
"You're no stranger to starving," she fired back. "You know what that does to a person."
Fenris mumbled curses in Tevene.
"The apostate life is no cupcake, either," Hawke went on nonchalantly. "You go from town to town, strange faces, no one will hire you. You get sucked into job scams, end up someone's sex slave."
"All the more reason they should be in the Circle," Fenris said. "They don't have your experience."
"Oh, have some faith, you nihilist," Anders said.
"Shut up," Fenris said. "If anyone deserves the Circle, it's you."
"Hey," Hawke said, and stopped them in place. She came into Fenris' face. "I've been pretty nice with you so far, but I can change very quickly, and unlike Anders or Aveline, I'm not a forgiving person." She came in so close he could smell the berry breath. "If you sell out any one of my friends, I'm gonna make you glow-fist your own balls out and make you eat them. Do you understand me?" she said very seriously.
Fenris looked at her, very contained. "Understood."
"Good," Hawke said, smiling. "You should trim your nose hair, by the way."
Fenris unconsciously touched his nose.
"Alright, let's calm down," Aveline said, and took her away from his face.
"If you want to take justice into your own hands, you're more than welcome to leave us and join the Templars," she said derisively. "I bet the Chantry will be super intrigued by what your markings can bring to the table."
Was that a threat? Fenris thought. It felt like she was holding over him the fact that his existence was a danger and that he would need help against Danarius. Or at least, he was starting to worry about that day coming with Hawke pissed off at him. He had to rethink some things.
Evening, Hightown
"You want to join us for a drink?" Aveline said.
"No, thanks," Hawke said. "I'm too tired. Just watch over Carver for me."
"You know, I heard him saying he's going to keep sixty percent of the coin for himself," Aveline said.
Hawke chuckled. "Make sure my brother understands that's not how we do it in my team," she said.
"With pleasure," the Guard-Captain said. "Fenris, do you want come for a drink? Oh, and here's your coin back for the lunch."
"Thank you, Aveline," Fenris said. More general coin splitting and sharing was done. "I'll pass on the drink. I'm tired too."
"Alright, kiddos, see you later," Anders said.
"You can't pull that off," they heard Aveline say as they went down the stairs.
So... just them. They didn't make much eye contact.
"Ok, bye—" she said grumpily and made to leave.
"Wait," Fenris said, massaging the back of his neck. "I... was thinking... I need to purify the mansion. Disenchant it... whatever..."
He looked so tortured, she thought. She must have really got to him.
"I need a witness," he went on. "I found some expensive wine. Would you... like to join me?"
Hawke crossed her arms and thought about it. "It had better be good wine."
"It must be. I was never allowed it," he said.
Evening, Fenris' Mansion
"So, how do we proceed with this... purification... baptism... thing?" Hawke said awkwardly, looking at the monstrous size of the mansion.
"Come to my bedroom and I'll show you," Fenris said, and realised how misleading that sounded.
Hawke's inner brows sloped upwards.
"That sounded wrong," Fenris said, with a little smile. "I meant, wait for me there and I will bring the equipment."
"It better not be some harpoon rope shit you bought from that BDSM lady," Hawke said suspiciously.
"Of course not," he said, looking at his mounted harpoons. She followed his gaze. Those were some big harpoons. "With you it's silky black rope, isn't it?"
Her eyes came back to him nervously. "You forget nothing," she said.
"Idem," he said, eyeing her sharply.
As she went up to the main room, her angry aura started to melt off. She remembered how broken he looked that night, and felt sorry for him. Then she remembered the shit show outside, and felt less sorry. But who better to take out his anger on then yours truly in a crisis? Either way, they set off a kite that may never come back, the way they started things. Maybe he was feeling guilty?
She went in the bedroom, and compared to the rest of the mansion, it was clean and neat and quite organised. The paintings were taken down and there was new bedding. The curtains seemed different too. And what was this under her boots... a new carpet? She sat down next to the fireplace. This was his safe space. His very small safe space.
He came back with two fancy bottles.
"I see you've redecorated," Hawke said, looking around. "But the walls are super shabby. This mansion must have been abandoned for a long time."
He didn't say anything. Looked a bit grim. He put one bottle on the little table next to her, and the other he kept in his hand, staring at it as if it ate his family.
"Aggregio Pavali," Fenris said bitterly. "There are six bottles in the cellar."
She was about to reply, but he suddenly seemed chatty. "Danarius used to make me pour it for his guests. My presence intimidated them, he said, which he enjoyed."
"He sounds like a dick," Hawke said. "May I?" she asked, and he let her open the other bottle. "So, they were frightened of you?"
"None of his guests were like you," Fenris said, a ghost of a smile.
Alright, wine boy, she thought, and drank. Are you complimenting me because we're alone, or do you want something?
"Would you like a glass?" he said.
She burped. "Nope."
Fenris nodded, and stared at the bottle again. Suddenly, he turned around and threw it into the wall.
"It's good I can still take pleasure in the small things," he said.
"Yeah, enjoy your new coat of paint," she said.
Fenris chuckled, which she forgot he could do, and he groaned to himself. "I've wanted to leave my past behind me, but it won't stay there," he said bitterly, taking a seat on the bench in front of her. "Tell me, have you never wanted to return to Ferelden?"
Hawke became visibly sad. "Ferelden will always be my home."
"The Blight is over. You could rebuild what you've lost. Do you truly not want to?" Fenris pressed.
Hawke shrunk away and hugged the bottle for a while. He felt he upset her.
"I cannot go home," she finally said. "Lothering was completely destroyed. And it hadn't been so great to me in the last couple of years before that."
"I'm sorry," Fenris said, watching her curiously.
"I don't like talking about it," Hawke said, and drank.
"I understand the feeling," he said.
She drank some more, and said, "Even if I could..." She sighed. "No. We worked too hard to get in. They were going to send us back on a ship. It was indentured servitude for a year or the darkspawn..." She took another sip. "No, Kirkwall is my home now."
"Having a place where you could put down roots," he said, thinking about it. "I understand."
"What about you?" she said, still a sad sack. "Do you have a home?"
Fenris closed his eyes, shaking his head slowly. "To have the option... would be gratifying," he said bitterly, looking away.
"Were you very young when you were taken then?" she asked.
"Perhaps," he said flatly.
Perhaps? There was a story there. But she wasn't willing to share hers, so she didn't pry any further into his.
Plus, she was already depressed. Time to find a silver lining. But the wine was too good. The line was blurry.
"So... we're both displaced, both running from shit," she said, giving him the bottle at last. He nodded in thanks. She leaned back in her chair, spreading her legs.
"And we both have some anger issues," he said, leaning back and drinking.
She looked up, cringing and smiling. "Yup."
"I'm beginning to see your point about the controlled environments," he said, pondering on it. He forgot to pass the bottle, keeping it under his chin.
"It would be hard though," she said, snatching the bottle from under his chin, which made him flinch. "After all, isn't that our issue? Being controlled."
The time for debates was over. He felt like bonding.
"Correct," he said. "Every time I think of it, I see red."
"I bet. To not have control over your body," she said, looking at his arms, "over your whole life."
"At least I know what must be done to end that fate," he said, and finally made some eye contact. "Do you?"
Hawke inhaled deeply, and hit the bottle over her knee. "I need a lot of money, for a start. More than we've made in a lifetime."
"So, the expedition is not just for the house," he said.
"No," she said, eyeing the tip of the bottle. She passed it on.
"Then I'll do my best to find you treasure," he said.
"Thanks," she said.
Maybe it was the wine, maybe it was her soft side. "Look," she said. "You don't have to worry. I'll be there when that asshole comes to town. Even if I'm mad at you that day."
"That is comforting to know," Fenris said with a smile.
She looked once more at the curtains. "Those are new, right?"
"Yes," he said. "It was an impulse buy. They... match my eyes."
"Well," she said, coming forward in her chair. "They are very pretty curtains."
"Thank you," he said in a deep voice, playing with the wine label.
"I wager you have trouble sleeping, and couldn't stand looking at his things again."
"I do have trouble sleeping."
All sorts of lines became blurry.
"Well, when we're married," Hawke said, grinning with delight, "we'll have a wall of enchanted harpoons all above our bedroom door," she said, illustrating. He listened to her, quite amused. "And we'll have three dogs; one clingy friend that will sleep on our feet, and two more sleeping right outside on fluffy rugs. And we'll have two noisy parrots roaming free, that, if anything, will wake us up in our old age."
"You've actually thought about this," Fenris said, bottle under his chin. He loved the free flying parrots idea.
"Well, you know I can't sleep either," she said, shrugging innocently.
"Is that even legal here?" he said, giving her the bottle.
"Yes, yes it is," she said, and made a toast. "It's frowned upon, 'cause it's not like Andraste ended racism."
"Still, that's quite a step forward," he said, thinking about it. He felt very constricted, thinking of the free parrots, and tried to take his gauntlets off. But something told him it wasn't wise.
"What? It doesn't come off anymore?" she said, amused.
"It's not that," he said, thinking. "I should have taken this off sooner."
"Why? Does the idea of blissful domesticity turn you on?" she said, winking.
A little, actually, Fenris thought, but that wasn't it. "Because I should take you home soon. It's very dark," he said, looking at the windows next to his bed. The ones where he did his nightly brooding.
"You don't have to do that," Hawke said. "I'm a big girl. I can be very scary," she said, pretending to have feline claws.
"Indeed," Fenris said. "If I knew Anso would find me a woman so capable, I might have asked him to look sooner."
"Smooth," she said, amused. She shook the wine bottle, and saw it had some left. "Fuck yer pansy arse mansion, ye limp dick gobshyte!" she said, very Ferelden, and threw it into the wall.
"That felt good, didn't it?" he said, grinning.
"It really did," she said. "Well, exorcism complete. Hope you have a good sleep," she said, getting ready to stand.
"I will still take you home," Fenris insisted.
"Oh, come on, don't tell me you're into that old-timey crap, too," Hawke whined.
"Far from it," Fenris said, which made her extremely relieved. "But, if I went missing, no one would bite your head off."
She thought of her family, and Varric. Oof, and he did not want to mess with Aveline. "Okay, point."
Fenris stood up, all smiley, and held out his gauntlet again. "Perhaps I'll practice my flattery for your next visit? With any luck, I'll become better at it."