DISCLAIMER: No, still not mine. Too bad for me.

"They were smart, they were popular, they were golden."
-On the Marauders (general truth)

CHAPTER TWO
(good with the ladies)

Severus Snape emerged from the infirmary. His hands were buried in his pockets to hide the fact that his fingers still bore a tinge of sausage-hue pink. But more noticeable than his long, messy hair and his hunched frame were his eyes. They were cold with fury and hatred, even as he walked with his head lowered.

He was barely two seconds out of the infirmary when he noticed four shadows darkening his path. Ice sliced through him, and he slowly looked up.

The Marauders beamed happily at him. Black said, grinning, "Welcome back to the real world, Snape. No Madame Pomfrey to protect you here."

Severus thought about all the revenge fantasies he had entertained while he was in the infirmary. Bile rose up in him as he stared stonily back at the four Gryffindors smirking cockily at him. They were smart, they were popular, they were golden. So why did they go out of their way to torment him? He hated it. He hated them. He hated how smug they were, standing in a line and blocking his way, their eyes alive with something suspiciously like pleasure. Tormenting him made them happy.

"Whoa, Snape, glare at us any harder and we may just turn into stone," Black said pleasantly. "We're trying to be nice here. Return the favor."

Potter and Pettigrew snickered. Severus stiffened. There was a long silence as the five males stared each other down. The air was bristling with tension.

After an eternity, Lupin cleared his throat and gave the other Marauders a warning glance. "Let's go."

There was a faint glimmer of something in his eyes as he glanced at Severus, something like pity.

Severus suddenly hated Lupin more than any of them. He clenched his fist inside the pockets of his robe and glared at Lupin, aiming all his hatred at him. "I don't need pity from charity cases," he spat out. He knew for a fact that Lupin was the poorest of the Marauders, with his shabby robes and lack of a broomstick. He also knew that Lupin's poverty was a sore point with them.

Then Severus walked forward, his jaw set. He shoved past the Marauders a bit more roughly than necessary, knowing he would pay for what he had said. But right then he didn't care.

Potter let him get a few steps away. Then, with all the reflexes of a superb Quidditch player, he moved so quickly that Severus ended up sprawled on the ground, his backside throbbing, not even knowing how it had happened.

"Watch your mouth, Snape," Potter said, his tone eerily quiet as he loomed over him, his wand pointed at his chest. For the first time since he had left the infirmary, Severus felt a tremor of real alarm.

Black appeared in his line of vision, also armed with his wand, his expression dark. "You're going to pay for that, you pathetic little -"

"Stop it." Something in Lupin's voice quieted Black's harsh words. Lupin was regarding his friends with a faintly bemused expression on his face. "I'm touched at how you leapt to my defense, but it isn't necessary. If one of you had said that, I would be offended, but since it's Snape..."

Severus understood, and he flushed. He struggled to sit up, and met Lupin's steady eyes. Then Lupin turned and began to walk away.

Pettigrew trotted after him. After a moment's hesitation, Black and Potter followed.

None of them bothered to glance back at him.

-------/----------

Lucius Malfoy strode down the corridors of Hogwarts, his gray eyes darkening with thought. He was thinking about that ridiculous plan Severus Snape had just proposed to him.

Was it possible? No, of course not. Severus was insane. But there had been something about the plan, something about how determined Severus was… but of course, who wouldn't be determined, desperate even, after that ridiculous black envelope stunt those Marauders had pulled…Severus must have thought about nothing but getting revenge while he was in the infirmary… meanwhile, the Marauders had barely been punished, just one little detention…

Lucius heard them before he saw them. Four rowdy voices, jesting with each other, turning the corner in front of him, just as a couple of high-pitched female voices rounded the corner behind him.

The Slytherin slowed his walk, and waited with an almost predatory anticipation. He hadn't had any close encounters with the Marauders since the school year began, and he intended to come out of this one the winner.

After a moment, the Marauders appeared in front of him. Potter, Black, Lupin – and Pettigrew. He still didn't understand how someone like Pettigrew managed to ingratiate himself in with the rest of them.

The girls giggled behind him, and Lucius turned his head slightly to see who they were. No one significant. Just a couple of girls that he vaguely remembered seeing sitting somewhere in the Hufflepuff table every breakfast.

When he glanced at the Marauders again, he saw to his disgust that they had turned on the charm. Potter's eyes were sparkling as he ran his hand through his hair; Black was ogling the girls with his perfect bloody grin on his face, as though they were queens; and Lupin was giving them a slow, lazy smile, as though he knew some delightful secret about them. Even Pettigrew was beaming at them, while discreetly giving them a thorough once-over.

Lucius could practically hear the girls falling in love. He sighed. Someone had to keep the ego of these four bloody sods in check, and it might as well be him. He looked straight at the Marauders and arranged his features into his best rich-haughty-bastard look, then waited for them to react. It didn't take long.

Potter and Black looked insulted, Lupin looked merely curious, and Pettigrew looked uneasy.

Lucius made sure their attention was on him, then he turned and looked at the girls.

As he gazed at them, two girls who were total strangers to him, he quirked a corner of his mouth upward, allowing warmth to enter his eyes. He turned away slowly, as though against his will. Then he took a step forward, and turned back again, as though unable to help it. He held them in his gaze, letting them feel the full impact of his silvery eyes.

The first one clapped her hand over her mouth and ducked her head, while the second one blushed so red that the torches on the walls seemed pale by comparison. The Marauders forgotten, the two of them moved towards Lucius, mesmerized.

"Hi…"

As the girls placed themselves in front of Lucius and introduced themselves, Lucius looked over their heads to the Marauders. They looked so shocked he almost laughed. Instead, unable to help himself, he winked. He winked at them.

Point made.

-------/----------

"He winked at us!" Sirius roared afterwards.

Even calm Remus was offended. But it was that time of the month when the moon was a perfectly round silver circle in the sky, and all the Marauders knew what that meant. The Shrieking Shack, a few tense nights of making up excuses to explain away the absence of one Marauder, exercising their abilities as Animagi, Remus weary and moody and irritable...

It was more than a week later before the topic was brought up again, but not by any of them.

Lily marched up to them one night in the common room, as they were sitting in front of the fire. Pettigrew and Black were playing chess, Remus was idly flipping through a textbook, and James was cleaning his broomstick -- but they all stopped short when Lily blocked the fire and put her hands on her hips, glaring at them.

A smile instantly formed on James' face as he put his broomstick aside. "Hey, Evans."

Sirius was more wary. "What?" he asked, watching Lily. She was outlined by the fire dancing behind her, and her red hair gleamed, while her green eyes flashed dangerously. Even angry, her delicate features were pretty, every curve and hollow enhanced by the play of shadow and light from the fire. Yeah, he could see why James liked her.

Finally, she spoke.

"What, did, you, do, to, Lucius, Malfoy?" she hissed, pausing after every word to emphasize it.

Peter dropped the black queen on the rook and bishop in his haste to answer Lily's accusation, and the chess pieces looked outraged. The queen was so annoyed that she decided on Peter's turn for him, lunging forward to take down a hapless white pawn. Peter didn't notice.

"We offended Malfoy?" He sounded outraged. "He offended us!"

"How?" None of the Marauders thought it was possible to see Lily sneering, but the look on her face at the moment could only be called a sneer. "By existing?"

"No," Sirius began.

Lily raised an eyebrow. "Well?"

Remus decided it would be best not to let Lily know that Lucius' offense was a wink. "That's private."

Lily eyed them, but she was cooling down. "We'll see." She started to walk away.

"Evans!" James waited until he was sure Lily was listening. "Did Malfoy approach you?" His voice was hard, almost angry.

Lily nodded.

"What did he say?" he demanded.

Anger flashed in Lily's eyes again. She said, clearly and loudly, "That's private."

"Just tell us, Evans." All the charm was gone, and James glowered at her.

Lily met his glare. "Make me." Then she was gone, hurrying up the steps to the female dormitory as though a pack of hounds was after her.

For a moment the Marauders were silent.

Then Remus said, "I wonder what Malfoy said."

James was more annoyed than he had been in quite awhile. "I can't believe she actually talked to Malfoy."

Unexpectedly, Sirius grinned. "You're just jealous."

James scowled.

"Talk to Mara tomorrow," Remus volunteered mildly. "She might know something, and she'll probably be more willing to talk."

Sirius was still grinning. "You know, I don't think a girl has ever challenged us like that before." He looked at James. "And, Prongs, you're a bloody hit with every girl but her. Couldn't you have charmed her into telling us? But no, it had to be, 'Just tell us, Evans.' Yeah, that's the Potter charm at its best."

"You're the one who flirts like there's no tomorrow," James grumbled. "And Evans isn't 'every girl.'"

Peter laughed. "Does she think we aren't a match for her?"

James said softly, "We are. Definitely."

"I'm staying out of this." Remus held his hands up, fighting to keep a grin off his face.

Sirius chortled. "I'm in. I wouldn't miss this for the Quidditch World Cup."

"I tell you, we'll know every detail of the conversation Evans had with Malfoy by tomorrow night." James glanced at the chessboard. "And by the way, Wormtail, looks like your Queen won the game for you."

Sirius and Peter looked down.

"Checkmate!" Peter announced gleefully.

"I would have won if Evans hadn't shown up," Sirius grumbled.

----/----------

Lucius found Severus in the library, looking through a book of dark arts. Which, technically, was against the rules. He was so engrossed that he was deaf to the world around him.

As Lucius drew nearer, he realized that he wasn't the only one headed for Severus. Madame Pince was also approaching. Lucius immediately swept into Severus' aisle, blocking him and his illegal reading material from the librarian's view, pretending to flip through a dragon book until she was gone.

As the sound of Madame Pince's footsteps faded away, Lucius slipped the book back into the shelf and regarded Severus with some disdain. The little idiot was a hazard to himself. What was he thinking, helping him?

"Severus," he said.

Severus jumped, startled, and nearly dropped his book. He visibly relaxed when he saw that it was only Lucius. "What? Did you change your mind about joining me?"

"No," Lucius said. "I still think your scheme won't work. But I'm going to help you."

Surprise flickered in Severus' dark eyes.

"Just this once," Lucius said sharply. "Only this once." He paused. "I talked to Lily Evans."

Severus waited tensely. She was the key to his revenge scheme. "And?"

"If you play your cards right, you might get her to do as you want."

"How?"

"Poison her ears about the Marauders, but don't go overboard. When she can see you, don't fight back against them, let them bully you. Then she'll come to you."

Severus blinked. "Why? I mean, how do you know this?"

A rare, genuine smile quirked Lucius' lips. "I'm good with the ladies." Then he turned and vanished into the maze of bookshelves, leaving Severus standing there, the book on dark arts dangling by his side.

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed.