Disclaimer- -mutters- dont own any LotR characters- only own the Order of the Sue, Cay and a few more
Notes- I made up the Order of the Sue. Anybody is entitled to use them if you want, dont bother asking- just say where you got them from Im sorry its taking me a while to update- my muse has gone walkies and I'm still feeling ill.
Pronunciation of my characters-
Caisha-
Cay-sha
Ysan- Ee-san
Dyanai- Di-yan-ey
Illyra-
Ill-aye-rar
Línarai- Lee-nar-ey
Bregedur-
Bree-ga-door
Aerauth- Ey-er-ow-th
To my
beloved reviewers- I luff you all .
Crecy- Very
mean horse Caisha will meet her worst enemies in this chapter.
Bless.
ChronicCheddar- Well, I always see Legolas as the nice one, and Boromir all mean- I decided to be different xD I think Caisha just has that effect on them. And Fred is based on this horse called Dominoe at my stables- that horse is evil -shifty eyes-
xkuroxshinobix- Nupe Its her birthday today! -does a dance- happy birthday to Caisha xD Yay
GothicShadow- That sucks... And I like Elrohir as the romance And I'll see you when ye get back.
-----------
Chapter Five - Of the Order of the Sue, Human Limpets and Birthdays
Elrohir
stood in the centre of a high-roofed chamber, his troubled grey eyes
fixed solidly on the figure of Elrond sat before him. He had not had
time to change out of his attire since his hunt in the forest, and he
was still dressed in the plain, dark green high-necked tunic and
hose, black boots scuffed and muddy from hours of endless searching.
He had a few bits of leaf and twigs sticking out of the dark colour
of his hair, disrupting his appearance entirely- a few snags in his
tunic had become rips where he'd caught them on brambles, and there
was a small cut in the side of his cheek, where a willow branch had
hit him with a vengeance... Strangely, there was a mark of lipstick
on his neck, in the shape of lips, which he'd tried to scrub off with
his hand, to no avail- all he'd done was smudge the red mark across
his neck, making him look like he had some sort of strangely shaped
rash. In his hand, he held a small pink ribbon, holding it out from
him as though it might contain some contagious disease. It had a
heart on the end... He looked dishevelled and so worried he was in
danger of becoming a very worried person. Elrond looked as equally
troubled, resting his chin on his hand as he surveyed the
twin,
"You're sure?"
"Unmistakable, my lord. I
found this, at the scene." he let the ribbon fall to the floor.
Elrond looked at it, and swallowed, pushing himself further into his
seat;
"Theres no way you could be wrong?"
"I saw
them myself... They nearly got me." he pointed to the lipstick
mark on his neck... Elrond surveyed it as though it was the mark of
death,
"I see... Thank the Valar you escaped... Where
abouts?"
"Just on the edge of Rivendell, in the forest.
They must have heard Legolas, Boromir and Aragorn are here."
"I
feared as much- I had hoped that the Fellowship would be gone before
the Order found out..."
"We'll need more reinforcements
to guard the Prince, Boromir and Aragorn." Elrond looked tired
and nervous as he bit on his bottom lip...
"What about
Caisha?"
"What about her?"
"You cant just
leave her with them!"
Elrond surveyed Elrohir
sceptically,
"Why not?"
"Well, because... You
know what the Order's like!"
"Yes." Elrond
physically shuddered, biting on his lip so hard that he drew blood,
"But we cannot risk the resources- the Order's lair is far from
here, and we need all the men we have to protect Legolas and Aragorn
from them, if they choose to return."
"So you're just
going to leave her in their hands?"
"What would you have
me do? Any male who sets foot near the Order is risking
death."
"But---"
"That is my final word. At
least the place shall be a lot quieter with her gone."
Elrohir
stared, in shock and horror, "You dont mean that,
surely?"
Elrond sighed, "I suppose not. But it's too
risky to even attempt to rescue her."
"Then I'll go
myself."
"You'll do no such thing, Elrohir."
Elrohir
narrowed his eyes, "Just try and stop me." he turned on his
heel, striding dramatically out the room, shedding bits of leaves as
he did so.
------
Caisha's head
was whirring- even without touching it, she could feel the lump that
had manifested itself on her forehead... She gave a small groan,
trying to blink away the darkness- only to realise that she was, in
fact, blindfolded. Peachy... She was more and more aware, as her head
cleared itself, that she was sitting on something suspiciously comfy-
it felt furry... She swallowed, biting on her bottom lip, as
voices filtered themselves into her head. There were some sickly
sweet voices floating towards her, and some that sounded like crystal
water running in a fountain, joined with what sounded like S Club
7- some were even singing alongCaisha swore- she was in
the middle of Pop Idol all over again... Eventually, the
voices became more and more clear- she could hear ones close nearby,
talking quietly over the track of Bring It All Back.
"...why
we had to take her." one voice was hissing- the malice turned
the pretty tones of love and happines in their voice ugly.
"Dont
you? Then you cant see further than your nose." a second voice
whispered calmly, sounding like stars dancing with rainbows... Caisha
thought she was going to be sick.
"Its a very pretty nose,
though." a third voice joined in, dancing like the dewdrops of
heaven on the flowers of paradise. Caisha felt woozy again, trying to
resist the sickening power of the voices.
"Thank you- for
£3000, I should hope so." hissed love-and-happiness
"I
dont understand why we did that to her hair, though." this was a
fourth speaker, whose voice was like beauty and light.
"I
dont like the colour blue." this was stars-dancing-with-rainbows
now, who was clearly some sort of leader.
"But, why did
you---" beauty-and-light started, only to be cut off.
"When
do I get to see Leggy?" this was a fifth voice. This girl had
the voice of a five year old; soft and childish, filled with
delight... Caisha wondered whether the five year old wanted it
back.
"Sssh... She's awake." came the voice of
dewdrops-of-heaven-on-paradise-flowers...
Caisha groaned as she
felt a very pointy-ended shoe kick her side,
"Are you awake?"
this was stars-dancing-with-rainbows again.
"I wish I wasnt."
Caisha muttered- there was a collective gasp from one of the
assembled, and a voice like clear summer water exclaimed,
"She
has no sweet voice! DEMON!" but then there was a sound like a
slap, and the voice of clear-summer-water shut up.
"Dont be
stupid-" stars-dancing-with-rainbows again "-She's not a
demon. Just misguided."
Caisha felt the blindfold knot being
tugged at, and blinked to clear her vision once the material had
shifted from her eyes- then immediately wished she hadnt... She was
in a large cave, which had somehow been transformed into a make-shift
room. It had clearly been furnished to seem 'homely'- though homely
to who, Caisha had no idea. Flower-shaped tables and chairs littered
the space inside, heart-shaped lanterns illuminated the spaces of the
cave-room in a pleasant glow, and mirrors were nailed up to every
space along the walls, alongside photographs of sunrises, rainbows
and anything that radiated calm, loving serenity... But that wasnt
the scariest thing- everything that filled the cave was pink and...
and...
"LACY!" she actually screamed the word, staring
around her wildly. It was true; any surface that could be covered
had, indeed, been swathed by lace doileys and cloth... Even the
cushion she was sat on, made of pink fur, was trimmed in white lace.
She quickly rolled sideways, unable to do any other movement
considering she had her hands and feet bound together by -yes, you
guessed it- pink lace strands which, whilst they may look fragile,
were amazingly strong...
"Yes. Lacy."
stars-dancing-with-rainbows moved to stand infront of her- Caisha
reluctantly pulled her eyes off the horrific to scene to look at her
captor, and swallowed. Stars-dancing-with-rainbows was about five
foot seven or eight, though she looked a lot taller as Caisha looked
up at her suspiciously- she didnt look right. She had
perfectly straight, long blonde hair that fell to her waist,
shimmering in the light spilled from the lanterns as she moved her
head... Two bright blue eyes, framed by long, lucious lashes, watched
Caisha with scrutiny, as a delicate nose scrunched slightly with
despair. Her full lips tugged into a dangerous smirk as elegant
fingers brushed hair back from her perfectly tanned skin. She had an
hour-glass like body, which Caisha would have envied if the end
result didnt make the girl look like a warped barbie doll... She was
wearing a white boob tube -Caisha was positive she was wearing a
strapless wonderbra, beneath it- and low-rise jeans, showing off the
top of her tanned hips. She had a peirced belly-button, the silver
bar showing up well against the golden colour of her skin... There
was a three foot long broad sword hanging from the girls belt, though
she looked like she could barely lift it, and a yew longbow strapped
to her back, alongside a quiver of white-feathered arrows... Oh sweet
god in Heaven, she'd been kidnapped by
Mary-Sue's...
Stars-dancing-with-rainbows cleared her throat and
spoke her beautiful voice again- the sound made Caisha want to crawl
under a rock and die, "My name is Britney-" gee, who'd have
figured? "-and I'm the Leader of the Order of the Sue..."
Caisha
winced as she propped herself up against the wall, dying to rub her
aching head, "Order of the Sue? Wassat then?"
Britney
wrinkled her nose again prettily, at Caisha ignorance,
less-than-pretty voice and lack of manners, "Every girl who
falls into Middle-Earth is immediately a Mary-Sue- it's the
law."
Caisha blinked- so, all these girls had fallen into
Middle-Earth before her? Why hadn't anyone told her? Here she was
thinking she was the only one... And--- hey, she wasnt a Mary-Sue! At
least, she damn well hoped she wasnt...
Britney seemed to know
what she was thinking, "Have you ever heard the idea that there
are millions of worlds, inside one world? That everytime you're
presented with a possibility, like which road to take, another world
plays out the possibilities that you didnt take, and what would have
happened if you did?"
Caisha nodded; who hadn't? She'd had
to write an essay on the possibilities of worlds within worlds for
one of her teachers... Britney waved a neatly tanned arm- Caisha
wondered whether she used a sunbed or lived in somewhere like Spain,
"There. I just brushed ten million other worlds... Well, you
see, life if Middle-Earth is like that, world within world; every now
and again, some girl falls through into this world from their own-
and, well, Middle-Earth wouldnt be able to contain us all, would it?
So each girl who falls in has their own world, where they affect
everything- you have yours, I have mine, and these have theirs.
Somewhere, there is a Middle-Earth without any girl falling in at
all, one with every Sue in, and one somewhere where S Club 7 have
fallen in." There was a collective sigh of admiration from the
collected Sues, and a shudder from Caisha... Britney, pretending not
to notice, carried on, "But I managed to find a way through to
this world, where all the Sue's roamed free- and I brought them here,
to the Sue Lair---" she was cut off here by
dewdrops-of-heaven-on-paradise-flowers;
"We call it the Pink
Paradise!"
Caisha smiled weakly, "Really?"
Britney
glared at at dewdrops-of-heaven-on-paradise-flowers, "Yes, thank
you, Christine." Christine glowered, but shut up as Britney
turned back to Caisha, "As I was saying, I brought them here, to
the Pink Paradise-" Britney pulled a face, "-and took them
under my wing, guiding them in the true way of the Mary-Sue, so that
when they return to their own Middle-Earth worlds, they can be all
the better for it!"
Caisha shrugged, though it was painful to
do so with arms tied behind her back, "Thats wonderful but,
first, wheres my world, second, how long have I been here, and third,
why am I here?"
Britney sat back in something Caisha
hadnt noticed before- the other Sues had been blocking it from view.
Now, they shifted aside and revealled a pink throne, copped with
little gold lace crown designs all along the cushion. Britney
steepled her fingers as she sat, resting her chin on her interlocked
hands and surveyed Caisha through her neat blonde fringe,
"You
have been here roughly three or four hours. I dont know where your
actual world is- I can only navigate through Middle-Earth. The world
in where you affect everything, however, is well-known to me.
We've been hunting for you for some time."
Caisha frowned all
the more, and repeated herself, "Why?"
"Because you
are in violation of the Mary-Sue Code-" Caisha was astounded.
These creatures had codes! "-and we-" Britney waved
a hand at the manically grinning Sue's, "-are here to help you
correct your ways."
Caisha tried to press herself into the
wall, though the stone remained stubbornly solid- she didnt like the
way things were going... Biding for time, she coughed to regain the
Sues attention; at Britney's words, they'd all broken out into
excited mutterings, "Uh... How have I broken the Mary-Sue
code?"
Britney sighed, settling herself back against the
soft, fluffy cushion of her throne, "Where do we start?"
she surveyed Caisha with a disapproving gaze, "Firstly, upon
arriving in Middle-Earth, you were immediately classed as a Sue- and
yet you showed me you clearly are not as perfect as us." she
leaned her head back off her steepled fingers- Sues were pulling
flower-shaped chairs up into a wide semi-circle around the throne,
looking intently at Britney and Caisha, "I thought that, given
time, you would come into the Mary-Sueness on your own- but no.
You're clumsy, most of the elves dislike you, you dont look good in
the gowns, you cant fight with a sword or bow to save you life and,
the worst crime-" she glared at Caisha "-you had blue
hair."
Caisha noticed the past tense of the word, and was
about to question further when beauty-and-light answered the unspoken
inquiry for her,
"Its pink now! Isnt that wonderful?"
Caisha
balked at this news, trying desperately to turn her head so that she
could see her hair, to no avail- someone had tied it back carefully
in a tight ponytail, leaving no strands loose that she might see. She
tried shaking her head to loosen some bits, but still couldnt catch
sight of her new colouring- swearing profoundly, she tried to push
herself to her feet, though they were also bound by the pink lace-
with a nod from Britney's beautiful blonde head, beauty-and-light
pressed her shoulder back down with surprising strength for the wirey
little half-elven brunette that she was. Caisha chose to shout her
indignance, instead,
"PINK! PINK? YOU INSANE BUNCH OF
HIPPIES! WHY, FOR THE LOVE OF THE GOD WHO HATES ALL THINGS LACY AND
SHAPED LIKE FLOWERS, WHY PINK!" The collected Sues drew back
from Caisha's vengeance- the girl, as has been said before, could
look terrifying when angry- not to mention she had bright, bubblegum
pink hair... It was a scary combination. Britney took Caisha abuse
calmly, and Christine gave a small little giggle,
"Well, we
happen to think pink's a nice colour---"
"I COULDN'T
GIVE A MONKEYS UNCLE WHETHER YOU BLOODY WELL THINK PINKS A BLOODY
NICE COLOUR! I DONT!" This caused more gasps- someone in
the crowd swooned and cried out "Blasphemy!"
Caisha
ignored them, not about to be stopped now she was on her angry roll,
"IF ITS NOT THE TWIN DEMONS OF HELL, ITS A BUNCH OF CRAZY,
PLASTICALLY ENHANCED BARBIE DOLLS WITH AN OBSESSION WITH LACE! AND
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE FUCKING TURN S CLUB 7 OFF! THEY SUCK!"
Someone in the crowd of Sues fainted with a cry of 'Never!' and a
roar of objection followed up- all the pretty voices mingled together
rather sounded like someone having their throat torn out by a pack of
wolves. Rather than the music being turned down, however, someone
turned it up, so that it was all the more noticable- Caisha
glowered.
Britney carried on, speaking over Caisha's outrage
calmly, as though she hadn't been interrupted in the first place,
"Thank you, Daisy, you can let go now." beauty-and-light
released Caisha's shoulder reluctanly- Caisha frowned. Daisy had some
extremely sharp false nails. Britney continued, "You have
managed two things of the Mary-Sue Code, however- one, you have
managed to complete the task of getting yourself involved with the
Fellowship, no matter for how short a time. This is promising... And
the second thing is, you're falling for one of the characters."
"AND
ANOTHER THING, I---" Caisha was cut off by Britney's words- she
stared at the Leader Sue in shock, "Saywhanow?"
Britney
just returned Caisha's gawp with her own level gaze- "True,
Elrohir isnt usually one chosen by our Sue's, considering Legolas,
Aragorn and Boromir get first picks- often, Elrohir doesent get a
mention, nor does Elladan... But its not that uncommon."
Caisha
laughed feebly, all anger forgotten at the moment, "Uhm, no,
actually, I dont think---"
Britney raised an eyebrow, "Good.
Don't think. It makes things easier for me, that way. And dont try to
deny it- our Sue Sensors miss nothing." she waved a hand up to
something behind Caisha, fixed to the wall she was leaning against...
Caisha, curious, turned herself awkwardly and leaned back, to see
what Britney was indicating- her jaw dropped. From one side of the
massive cave wall to the other, running from the roof to about half
way down the wall, were small computer screens, blinking and flashing
away to themselves. There must have been hundreds. Caisha looked at
the nearest one, which was a few feet above her, craning her neck to
see properly...
It was a row of status, like you would expect to
see on a computer game; first up was a name, then an age, a small
portrait and a breif description, cramped in a small box-like space
at the top. After that, a thin red bar ran across the screen,
finishing in a small heart to indicate it was the Sue's health...
Below that, if the Sue that that Sensor was monitoring had a magical
power of some sort, their mana bar showed how much magic they would
be able to use before needing a rest. After that, were the usual
stats of Hunger, Hygiene, Happiness, Comfort... Caisha felt like she
was looking at a real life version of The Sims. At the very
bottom, was a small scale, reading 'Love'- the bar shifted according
to how deeply in love the said Sue was. In this case, on the Sensor
Caisha was looking at, monitoring some Sue called Lilac, the bar was
full, and a small name in a box besides the scale showed who the
object of the Sue's desire was; the love of this 'Lilac' was
'Legolas'... Caisha couldnt surpress a roll of her eyes- surprise
surprise...
Britney watched Caisha studying the Sue Sensor's,
before deciding it was time to speak again; "As you can see, we
know near enough everything about you. And I know that you're falling
for Elrohir."
Caisha pulled a face, "Thats ridiculous...
Hes like, two thousand years old or something as equally ancient...
It'd be like going out with a fossil! Or Ross, from
Friends..."
Britney sighed and shook her head, "You'll
find that, in Mary-Sue romances, age often doesn't matter."
"Well-"
Caisha looked indignant "-It matters to me. I really dont want
to fall for someone old enough to be my great-great-great whatever
grand-dad!"
"Tough. You're falling for him. You can't
stop it... And besides-" Britney gave a small shrug of her
delicate shoulders, "-if you think that he didnt mature until
about a hundred years old-" Caisha stared, "-then hes only
really about twenty something, in our terms."
Caisha didn't
want to know what went on in that strange girls head- it made no
sense to her at all.. Changing tact, she sighed, and wriggled a
bit,
"Well, be that as it may, can someone at least cut these
bonds?"
Britney, not sensing any immediate danger, nodded to
Daisy- the brunette, half-elven Sue slipped a small dagger out of
nowhere Caisha could see, and quickly glided the blade down through
her bonds... Only, Britney clearly didn't know Caisha too well- the
pink-haired teen scissored her legs out now they were free of the
bonds, thanking the Gods that the muscles hadn't cramped themselves
up, to swipe Daisy's legs from under her- only Caisha also forgot she
was in a world of Sue's now... Daisy jumped aside with inhuman speed,
hissing like an angry cat- only she dropped the knife... Before
anyone could do anything other than stare, Caisha launched herself
across the floor, wincing slightly as her muscles objected to the
sudden movement, after hours of stillness, to snatch up the knife.
Pushing herself to her feet, she waved the knife around foolishly,
once again forgetting she was trapped in the world of Sue's- several
hundred swords, daggers, bows and arrows were suddenly pointed at her
head and various stretches of her anatomy... And through it all,
Britney just watched with mild amusement.
Caisha, suddenly finding
the odds were several hundred to one, lifted her hands up in the air,
and dropped the knife to the floor- Daisy quickly reclaimed it,
glaring at her. Caisha returned the glare, and was about to say
something until someone prodded her in to silence with the tip of an
arrow; she suspected it was love-and-happiness... Britney raised her
hand up, to regain everyones attention- Caisha spotted a small
flower-shaped ring on her middle finger... It was pink. She scowled,
as Britney began to speak,
"Peace, Sister Sues'. As I said
earlier, she is just misguided..." And to Caisha, she gave what
she clearly thought to be a comforting smile, much like a therapist
might give, "Don't worry. We're here to help... For God's sake,
Stacie, stop doing that!" Stacie, known to Caisha as
love-and-happiness, had left the crowd of angry weapon-weilding Sues
so that she could coo over herself in one of the mirrors on the wall.
Stacie scowled, turning to look back at them, only to find the entire
Order of the Sue staring at her, and Caisha siezed the oppertunity.
Quickly, before anyone noticed, she ducked under the weapons that
were aimed at her, shoving through the Order and breaking free of the
crowd- not knowing where she was going, she sped through the tables
and chairs to the opposite end of the cave-like room, searching for
someway out...
As she searched the vast room for some sort of
obvious or secret enterance, she heard the Sue's shouts as they
realised she'd gotten away from them... Racing along the length of
the cave, still searching for a way out, she prayed the silent prayer
of an athiest who hopes to be wrong; please, god, save me from the
rabid Sues... I'll be good, I promise... Well, good enough... Just
dont let them make me wear lace!
She turned, like a
cornered rabbit, to face the oncoming crowd of Sue's, feeling the
first dregs of fear set in- christ, these girls were insane...
Still desperately searching for her way out, it was sods law that she
saw the small archway, wreathed in flowers, at the opposite end of
the cave, beneath the Sue Sensors- how could she have not seen it?
She'd been sat right next to the bloody thing... Trying to slip away
again, she found herself edged in on all sides, as the Order
advanced... and -oh, God!- one was waving a mascara brush at her, a
manic smile on her face...
Things would have gone very badly for
our poor pink-haired heroine (-who knows? Maybe even a full make-over
would have been on the torture schedule XO! The horror!-) had not a
rather familiar figure, riding a fine iron grey desterier, come
charging through the wreathed archway, shaking pink flowers out of
his hair irritably, swearing the few choice words he'd picked up
since Caisha's arrival in Middle-Earth- his shoulders and arms were
covered in what looked like pink snakes, that he tried to dislodge by
shaking, to no avail... Caisha noticed it was silly-string, and
wondered how it had happened- no doubt he hadn't faired better at the
hands of the Sue's than she had... She could even see numberous
lipstick and lipgloss smears covering his face and neck. A few Sue's
turned around at the sound of galloping hooves, and a few more gawked
at him- someone in the crowd cried out over the sudden hush,
"Oh
my god! Its---"
Caisha finished the sentance, calling out in
a delighted cry, "Elrohir!"
------
Elrohir
had first discovered Caisha was missing when he found Aerauth,
commonly known as Fred, lazily grazing near the tree that had knocked
Caisha out of the saddle in the first place... Knowing fully well
that all the elven horses were trained to stop immediately if they
lost their rider, purposely or no, Elrohir knew that Caisha had to be
around there somewhere- and so he was extremely worried to find that
she wasnt... He hunted through the shrubs and surrounding area, his
ring of search growing wider as his panic mounted... He had had no
idea where she'd gotten to- until he was Glomped, that is.
To be
Glomped is a deadly thing. It is when a rabid fan girl launches
themselves onto the object of their hearts desire, knocking them
over, slobbering with lust, and latches themselves to them,
smothering their protests by the pure force of their Glomp. It is
near enough impossible to dislodge a Glomper once they have a hold-
they are like human limpets, with extra of those little sucky pad
things. Once a Glomper has taken root on you, it is suggested you try
and scream for help as much as possible, kill the Glomper or live
with it.
Our Glompee, the half-elven Elrohir, managed to pry
himself free from his Glomper by pure luck- he had still been holding
Bregedur at the moment of his Glomping, and the massive horse's reins
had gotten between the rabid fan girl Glomper, and Elrohir had
managed to use the thick leather strips to pull himself free- but not
before the Glomper had planted kiss upon kiss on the side of his neck
and face- the lipstick would prove later irremovable for a few days
yet. Before fleeing on Bregedur, Elrond managed to snatch the pink
ribbon from the girls beautifully mysterious black hair, and wound it
around his hand in disgust as he sped off into the shadows of the
forest... The ribbon had a heart on the end.
About two hours
later, having been searching that whole time, he'd stormed out of
Elrond's House, re-saddled Bregedur and disappeared before anyone
could stop him- he wouldn't even tell Elladan where he was going. All
he had said to his brother was; "Somewhere you cant
follow..."
Everyone knew where the Order of the Sue made
their lair- nearly every male character in history had been kidnapped
at some point or another, and taken through the small window between
the worlds that the Leader of the Sue had discovered... If Elrohir
ever got his hands on that Lyra and Will for making that bloody
window, he'd personally make sure Will stuck that subtle knife where
the sun dont shine... (-A/N; Read His Dark Materials if you dont know
what Im on about xD-) Through that window, the Order of the Sue had
made their lair- known as the 'Pink Paradise' -and had been there for
the past few hundred years. They didnt often make an appearance; but
even Sauron would be petrified if he had the Order living on his
doorstep- just mentioning the Order could strike more fear into the
hearts of males than Voldemort and Sauron combined. A Mary-Sue is a
powerful, dangerous weapon that should not be taken lightly...
How
he managed to get Bregedur through the small window between worlds
was something he would never be able to understand- one moment, he
was tugging on the reins to try and get him to walk through, then the
next, the iron grey steed was stood besides him, snorting the
equivilent of a horsey laugh. Elrohir suspected there was something
not quite right with that horse...
He'd found himself in a long
corridor, which ended in a wide archway, wreathed in pink flowers,
and a large room beyond- he could hear shouting from the room beyond.
The corridor itself was made of plain white marble, with a load of
posters stuck up along the wall- bewildered, Elrohir had recognised
posters of Legolas, Aragorn, Boromir, Frodo and other,
not-so-sought-after characters that covered the wall in a massive
Lord of the Rings collage. He stepped closer to Bregedur, who had
nuzzled his shoulder as though in comfort,
"This place is
evil... I fear for her..." he had muttered, his voice echoing
eerily along the empty hall- he pulled himself up into the saddle
quickly, collecting the reins up- but Bregedur had not taken more
than one step forward before an alarm set off, screaming out
'Intruder Alert', repeatedly, in a voice that sounded suspiciously
like Hillary Duff- though Elrohir wouldn't know about that... Out of
nowhere, Elrohir found himself showered with pink silly-string,
emerging from somewhere in the rafters of the roof, and a bouquet of
pink flowers descended onto his head, sticking to the silly string
and getting caught up in the tresses of his hair. Bregedur, taking
fright at this sudden attack, had bolted down the corridor, breaking
through the archway at the end and thundered into the cavernous room
beyond; Elrohir was aware of a lot of small screens flashing at him
before his attentions were caught by the large crowd of scarily
perfect girls, surrounding another girl- one of the girls cried out
something, and he caught his name being yelled in the sudden hush...
He recognised that voice...
Bregedur stomped and tossed his regal
head, nares quivering as a few Sue's approached- his hooves scraped
against the cushions littering the floor dangerously, but Elrohir was
still looking for the owner of that voice- there! A figure moved in
the crowd, barreling through the mass of Mary-Sues, calling his name
again, waving her hand so it could be seen over the top of the the
Sue's heads- and then a teenage girl with bright, baby pink hair in a
tight ponytail, wearing a silvery white, hooded cloak, had fallen
free of the crowd, racing towards him. He tried to twitch Bregedur
away from what he presumed to be another Glomper, only Breg, snorting
at his riders ignorance, stayed stubbornly put. Elrohir watched in
terror as the pink-haired figure ran towards him, pursued by most of
the Sue crowd- his hand rested on the hilt of his sword, preparing
himself to use it against a girl... The pink haired girl was drawing
nearer- it was terrifying, it was dangerous, it was... it
was...
"Caisha!"
Elrohir stared in surprise;
last time he'd seen her, hadnt she had blue hair? But he had no time
to dwell on the matter, because she was being closely chased- he
nudged Bregedur forwards to meet her, leaning a hand down to grab her
outstretched one... Caisha gripped his hand in hers, holding on
tightly as she felt him pull her up- she had to swing her body rather
aerobically to the side so she could slide into the saddle infront of
him- there was no time for pleasant greetings, considering the Order
of the Sue was very close to them now, and she just held on to the
saddle horn grimly as Bregedur turned himself, Elrohir kicking the
horses flanks slightly. The dappled desterier took off, from a walk,
straight into a charge, and Caisha shut her eyes against the wind as
the air whipped about her- please God, dont punish me with anymore
trees...
The sounds followed them- Caisha half imagined she heard
someone flying, behind them- she could certainly hear the soft
beating of wings... She opened her eyes cautiously, still clutching
on tightly as the horse rocketed down the cave, towards the arch way.
She could hear Britney's voice clear over the sound of the hub-bub,
and caught a fleeting glimpse of the blonde Leader still lounging in
her throne, looking highly amused, before they broke through into the
marbled corridor... At the speed they were go, she was relieved for
the feel of Elrohir's arms around her as they held the reins, keeping
her from falling, and the solid realisation of his chest behind
her... Britney had obviously been lying about Caisha falling for
him... hadnt she? She bloody well hoped so. The idea of being in love
with a fictional character was not very appealing...
She felt
Elrohir lower his head to her ear, shouting to make himself heard
over the wind and the yells,
"I dont know the way
out!"
Caisha shook her head- neither did she. "Just
ride!" she called in return.
"Where to!"
"No
idea. Just do it!"
Elrohir obeyed, spurring Bregedur on with
a kick of his booted heels- the next thing Caisha knew was that the
marble hallway had fallen back into trees, and an expanse of wild
grass sprouted beneath the horses hooves, where flagstones had been
just a moment again... She spun around in the saddle, still holding
on, to look behind them- forest loomed up to meet her gaze, rather
than the marble corridor she'd been expecting... Astounded, she
twisted back around to see where they were going. Bregedur had
dropped down into a quick canter, picking his own path home amongst
the forest...
When Caisha finally trusted herself to speak, she
noticed that darkness had set in, and the night was thick about
them...
"Elly?"
Elrohir's breathing was quick and
short, having just navigated their escape from a rather perilous
bunch of girls,
"Yes?"
"Was I just kidnapped by
a bunch of rabid Mary-Sues?" she was half-hoping she'd dreamed
it, and that she'd been lying unconscious on the floor all this
while...
"Yes."
"Damnit."
There was a
silence, broken only by the occasional snap of a twig as Bregedur,
now at a leisurely trot, stepped over it, before she spoke
again;
"Elly?"
"Yes?"
"What----
------
Back
in Pink Paradise, Britney watched as the Sues', all looking
thoroughly ruffled and exasperated, assembled around her throne,
"We
need to follow them!" This was Daisy, calling out over the tops
of the Sues' heads...
Britney shook her blonde head, "No..."
"Why
not? I've already tacked Prettyblossom up!" that was Christine,
her voice wailing. Britney almost shuddered; Prettyblossom was
Christine's rather disgustingly fast horse, that resembled a My
Little Pony more than the great warhorse she made out he was...
"I
dont care." she replied calmly, "She's doing some things
right, at least. We will give her time to correct her ways, in her
own time. That Elrohir came to save her is as equally
promising..."
"I like Elrohir..." this was an
obscure voice in the crowd, muttering to themself... Britney
glared,
"Well, Jade, I dont care whether you like Elrohir.
That Elrohir came for Caisha. Not you."
Jade sulked,
frowning at the Leader of the Sue, "Spoilsport..."
Britney
rolled her beautifully shaped eyes and ignored her, "As I was
saying-" she sent another glare at Jade and Christine, "-we
shall watch and wait... If she screws up, then we can take her
with us again. As it is, I am not about to risk more rescue attempts
to bring her back. She will come into the MarySueness on her own...
And if she doesent? Well..." Britney grinned manically, "We'll
cross that bridge when we come to it."
------
----time
is it?"
His eyes flickered to the sky, then to the back of
Caisha's pink-haired head,
"A few hours before
dawn."
"Oh."
"Why?"
"Its my
birthday..."
To Be Continued- Yes, that was a very random chapter Did you like?
