Keri: Alright! Anyways, Chapter 17!
Robin:grumbles: How many chapters is this thing anyways?
Keri: I don't know! Maybe I should end it soon.
Robin: Nooooooo!
Keri: Wait a minute! You just said...
Robin: Keep going woman...
Keri:grumbles: You're the woman. Anyways! Reviews! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

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Disclaimer: No...own...only...own...Doritos! YES! eats them all

A/N: May 9th, 2005: BE WARNED! I was feeling VERY PERVERTED TODAY!

Pervert: To put to a wrong or improper use; misuse. See Synonyms at corrupt
Perverted: Of, relating to, or practicing sexual perversion.

A/N(2): It's all in different point of views...so be sure to pay attention!

Chapter 17: Perverted thoughts and points of view

4:30 P.M. - Starfire's POV

Starfire's House

Trying not to barf

Mom has a date tonight and I've met the guy before. He's a sleazeball! I really hate him! I want to seriously punch him. But I can't because I have to be a good lady. Like mom's a good lady...I hear her when he's over she's all like 'Do Me Ricky!' What kinda name is Ricky anyways!

Ding Dong

Oh great. He's here. Mom just opened the door. Screw you mom!

"Hello Kori. It's very nice to see you! How are you?"

Your mom.

"She's fine. I made us dinner."

Fine! Don't think of your child! I swear sometimes I hate my life. SCREW ME OVER WORLD!

"I love you, Victoria."

I never realized how stupid my moms name is.

"I love you too Ricky."

Is it love or is it lust? Probably lust. I wouldn't be suprised if he threw her on the floor now and...gag me. I need to talk to Robin...

Robin...

Robin...

Robin...

Robin...

Oh dear god.

5:00 P.M.

Trying not to think of Robin right now.

Food...

Ice cream...

Tape...

Robin...

DANGIT! I sound like a freaking fangirl!

Hair monster...

That reminds me of The Grudge...

How I wanted to hold Robin and have him comfort me...

I didn't even know him then! WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH ME!

Poptarts...

Scooby Doo...

Robin...

M n Ms...

Did I just say Robin?

Dang, this is impossible.

5:00 P.M.

Raven's POV

Who's that girl?

I was on a date with Beast Boy. Yes. THE Beast Boy. You know Gar? Ok, this is VERY hard. I keep imagining him in a pink speedo.

1) I hate pink.

2) Speedos?

3) ...He doesn't have abs.

4) He's probably one of those people who wears goggles and fins and hopes to find money.

5) His arm is around me...I could squeal like a little girl...

AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYE! Wait...he's leaning into kiss me...what should I do! I DON'T WANT TO BLOW UP THE LIGHTS! Well...

Nothing happened. Why you ask? Because some shrilly voiced prep called out his name. Over use of make-up alert! What happened! DID THE CIRCUS COME TO TOWN WITHOUT ME KNOWING IT! That was mean...

"So, Gar, wanna come to something better?"

Dear God, slay me now. Doesn't she make enough money on her freaking corner! She probably pays people and doesn't get any money. You freaking slut. Leave my man alone! Wait, did I just say my man?

...Yes MY MAN!

"Go away Christy. I'm on a date with Raven."

WHY DON'T YOU JUST HOLD UP A SIGN THAT SAYS ONLY 200 DOLLARS A NIGHT! SOME NEEDY BUSINESS MAN WOULD COME TO YOU!

"But what we had was special!"

SPECIAL! YOU CALL YOUR PROSTITUTION SPECIAL? Honey, there's plenty of other whores out there better than you. Get a grip on reality. Wait, Gar looks hot when he's standing there...defending me...

Sex.

Sex.

Gar...

Oh no. I'm losing it.

"ONLY 200 DOLLARS A NIGHT GAR!"

Wow. Who's good?

5:15 P.M. Rose's POV

Dilemma...big dilemma.

I'm acting like a sex-crazed pervert. (Be warned Rose)

Dear god, I'm thinking about the drug addict again. Larry! I love you! Do me now...

"So, Rose, do you want to go out?" Larry asked.

Yes! I heard Motel 6 was good!

"I want you-"

To bear my children?

"-to wear something nice."

Is something sexy and slinky ok? Dear Lord save me.

Sex.

Sex.

Larry...

This isn't good. I'm becoming a sex-crazed pervert. Thnk about something disgusting Rose.

Maurice...

Maurice...

Larry...

GAH! Heaven help me. Forgive me father, for I have sinned.

"Rose?"

I swear I won't do it again! Even though Larry's butt is great. His butt is also firm. I wonder if he does butt-ups? Hmm...I want a butt like that.

I just said butt 4 times in the last 15 seconds.

"Rose? Are you ok?"

Confession is calling me...

"ROSE! IS IT THE DRUGS AGAIN! ARE YOU SAYING YOU'RE FAT BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT!"

Larry, is it my fault you're like chocolate? One taste and I'm hooked...I just used a lame pick-up line. Oh kami-sama save me.

"ROSE! I SWEAR I'LL COME OVER THERE!"

Oh yes, please come over. I mean...

"NO! That's ok! I'll meet you tonight! You're picking me up at 7:30 right?"

"Yeah, I am. Bye Rose."

Here's your chance! TELL HIM! TELL HIM YOU LUST FOR HIM!

Shut up left side of the brain.

5:45 P.M. Robin's P.O.V.

Please save me from this delayed torture Kami-sama.

Starfire and I are talking on the phone.

I love talking to Starfire on the phone...her voice is so soothing...I could fall asleep...as long as she laid next to me...oh man. Hormones are kicking in. Dear lord...soon I'll be a sex-crazed pervert like those business men who do whores like Christy...Gawd I hated her. She was so baudy. Did I just say baudy? What does that mean anyways?

"So, Robin, would you like to go out tonight?" She said pleadingly.

Guess Ricky is over. Ricky was his name right? I always thought it was Dicky. But what can I say? Dick is a great name. Look wheres it gotten me?

Ready for Motel 6...

Shut up brain. I hate you.

"Please Robin?"

What can I say to that voice? It's so sexy. She could be one of those sex line voices...

Seriously brain. Shut up.

"Sure to where?"

My house...my house...

"Your house? Brenda makes the best spaghetti! Then we could go out for awhile. I don't think I want to be here...a lot. He grosses me out. He's like a big slime ball who never takes a shower then never brushes his teeth. Eww, he kissed my cheek one time and I felt like a..."

"Star, I get it. You can come over!"

"I can! Robin! I love you!"

Dead Silence

She loves me? Love...love...YES! HAHAHAH! SUCCESS FOR ROBIN! DO THE DANCE! DO THE DANCE!

Why does my brain have to be so stupid?

6:00 P.M. Keri's P.O.V.

Getting ready for a date.

Why do I have to be a girl?

You know what? I HATE BEING A GIRL SOMETIMES! THE CLOTHES ARE FREAKING HARD TO FIND AND WEAR! Marissa says the baby blue skirt but no...

You want to impress Cy...

Why do I have a 2-sided brain...one being perverted!

Because I'm always here...

Shut up. Seriously.

La La La...I'm perverted...Cyborg is a sexy beast. I JUST WANT TO DO HIM!

"What the heck?"

"SHUT UP KERI!"

Up yours mom. Up yours.

Now that's a mean thing to say! Take your mind off of it and think of Cyborg. You know, you have a lot of pens. Why don't you put them down his pants and then try to grab them and grab...

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!

The pens. What were you thinking of?

...Oh. The PENS.

So, the baby blue skirt and the white off the shoulder shirt and the blue high heels and the white chandiler earrings. Wow. I look good.

Good enough to eat my friend...

Uh, what?

5:05 P.M. Raven's P.O.V.

Wow, this is getting creepy.

We're talking about nuts.

"So, umm, what kind of nuts do you like?"

Don't laugh Raven. You can do it.

"I like honey roasted nuts."

Come on Raven. Don't laugh.

"And salted."

I'M TELLING YOU! DON'T LAUGH! THIS IS AN EFFIN DATE!

"Where do you think Christy went?"

I don't give a toss because she's an effin wanker. I just said toss and wanker.

"Umm...I think...I like..."

Don't laugh.

"Salted and honey roasted even though they are really fatty and clog your arteries."

Smooth Raven. Smooth.

"You need to clog your arteries Rae. You need fat on your bones."

Did he just comment me or insult me? He just called me Rae.

You liked it. Now, do as the song says. Save a horse, Ride a cowboy.

I need a new brain.

"Do you want to go to the park Rae?"

He just called me Rae again.

Calm down cowgirl. Don't blow a flipping gasket.

Shut up.

"Love to."

6:00 Starfire's P.O.V.

Potential disaster.

Bertha's sick.

Not good. We're both making spaghetti together, stealing glances at each other.

You're going to get it on tonight.

Shut up brain. We're not having a flippin baby.

Sure darling. He's the one!

I'm having a fight with my brain about Robin and his child. What is this world coming to!

You want to knock him up...come on...

This is too perverted for me.

"Is the sauce ready yet?"

Yeah and so am I.

What is wrong with me?

You're dealing with your BRAIN Star. Your perverted brain. Watch out.

Greeeeeeeeeeeeat.

"This sauce tastes wonderful Star! You're the best!"

See? He loves you. Just grab him and make out with him.

Kami-sama save me please.

6:55 P.M. Keri's P.O.V.

Not the best time.

I wonder when Whose Line is on tonight.

"Oh, Cyborg! It's so nice to see you!"

Knock her out. Come on Keri. Knock her out.

I can't. I don't know her.

I don't know if he does either.

Umm...what?

"Uh, Keri? This is my ex-girlfriend Amanda." I waved it off.

Nice Keri. Smooth.

Why is this so confusing?

"Why is this so confusing?" Amanda asked.

Whoo. We have a copy-cat here.

"Umm, Keri. I hope you can be friends." I waved it off again. I heard her mutter '...and I'll get him back too.' I waved that off too.

Wait...Whhhhhhat?

Keri: Whoot! What a chapter.
Robin: You made everything so perverted!
Keri: Hey, atleast I'm done.
Robin: Can you do a regular chapter next time?
Keri: Yeah, sure whatever...OOOH! I CAN DRESS YOU UP AS A GIRL NEXT TIME!
Robin: Kami-sama...Keri's gone on a rampage.
CJ: Where am I!
Keri: You'll be in the next chapter...R n R!

P.S. Kami-sama is God.

P.P.S. 9 pages!