Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuki.
A/N: It's late on Good Friday evening and I'm writing a yaoi Saiyuki fic, how my life needs fulfillment. I've never expressed myself through a story like this before, believe it or not, Gojyo's speech towards the end of the story comes from my actual feelings towards a certain person. I would like to dedicate this story to my friends Erika and Megan, my best and greatest supporters. I love you guys, and this one's for you.
The Way of Words
"Gojyo…do you love me? " Hakkai whispered into the red head's ear. The two were collapsed beside each other on their hotel bed that they had shared since two months prior. Their journey west was suddenly interrupted by Goku's sudden illness and they were marooned in this town until he was well enough to journey on.
Gojyo and Hakkai were lovers, make no mistake. But Sanzo and Goku had no idea, or so Hakkai and Gojyo believed. They were, as far as the two demons were concerned, oblivious to the countless ministrations in the dark, the walks alone in abandoned villages and the stolen kisses in the jeep when they thought no one was watching. According to them, their sex, romantic and homosexual life was kept strictly under wraps until they were alone.
Nights like these were beginning to grow scarce. Gojyo and Hakkai had taken this stall in their journey as an opportunity to get to know each other better, but they had under estimated the forces against them. The most powerful…Gojyo's undecided sexual orientation. Hakkai had brought up the subject before, months ago. Gojyo refused to specify which he was, gay or straight. He wouldn't even admit to being bisexual. Hakkai had felt self conscious around him ever since, not knowing if his lover was in fact in love with him or not. Eventually, about two weeks into their abrupt stay in the small village, Hakkai began to look for signs of love in Gojyo. Little did Hakkai know, Gojyo was an expert in the art of courting and quickly anticipated what Hakkai was doing. He brushed him off with a quick kiss and Hakkai was temporarily satisfied. Ever since that day when Gojyo kissed Hakkai after realizing that Hakkai doubted his love, Gojyo made sure that his sensitive lover knew of his feelings, and that night, he was given the opportunity he was waiting for.
"Gojyo…do you love me? " Hakkai repeated, sprawling himself on the scarlet haired man's chest, tracing lazy circles over his collar bone. Gojyo placed a hand on Hakkai's bare back, running it unconsciously up and down.
"Love you?" Gojyo rested his chin on Hakkai's head. "Sure I do. Why not." Gojyo felt a sudden pang in his heart. Is that what Hakkai wanted to hear? Is that what he wanted? He felt Hakkai sigh and reach up to grab Gojyo's shoulder. The half demon kissed the brown haired man in his arms lightly on the head.
"Nothing is ever definite from you. It's always maybe…sure…whatever…I never hear any yes's or no's, I want an answer not a possibility, Sha." Hakkai was now propping himself up on his elbows on Gojyo's chest waiting expectantly for an answer. Gojyo pondered that for a moment, looking at the ceiling and his hair and anything else that wasn't Hakkai's gaze.
" To a man like me, who's been with so many women, and seen so many things he was never meant to see, it's hard to give straight answers sometimes Kai'…" Hakkai waited intently, hanging on every word like a cliff. "And when we treasure something as much as I treasure you, we often lose sight of things that are important…like straight answers and definite proposals. You just have to tell me…all you have to do is say something Hakkai, all you have to do is look at me once with those eyes and I melt. I can't tell you how I feel because I don't know the words to describe it. I don't know the words to tell the world how much I love you." Gojyo opened his eyes, which he had closed without realizing, to find his lover, head resting in palms, tears running down his perfect face. Gojyo reached out and brushed some of them away, before pulling the thinner man up to his own face, kissing him lightly on the lips. Hakkai whimpered a bit and then slid his pale arms around Gojyo's neck, deepening the kiss. Gojyo's arms caressed the smaller man's back as the two shared an embrace before drifting into a silent sleep, holding each other. Loving each other. Living.
A/N: I know it's very short but my tank was running on empty towards the end and I wanted to finish it tonight. Sorry, but it's a oneshot; I can't handle having three stories on the go at the same time. Keep reviewing, and remember, true love is often found in the most unlikely people imaginable, but only when you're not looking for it.