Part 59
--The Elsa II is caught up in an unreal light as it disappears from sight. Albedo lets out a wide grin as the tiny cargo ship comes into full view.--
Albedo: --appears on screen-- I've been
waiting for you! Now I can destroy all my enemies with one shot!
--cackles hysterically-
chaos: We'll never bow down to you,
Albedo!
Albedo: Who says anything about bowing? You may all
stand up for your execution! --grins maliciously-
Jr:
MO...MO...
Albedo: That's RIGHT Jr! Your beloved play
thing is going to kill billions of people! How do you
think of her innocence NOW? --cackles viciously-
Ziggy:
--steps out in front-- Enough! Albedo...I have killed you once
before...I will kill you again!
Albedo: Eh? You never
killed me before!
Ziggy: Upon the hills of gum drop medows,
we fought a fierce battle with candy canes and faerie magick!
You...lost.
Albedo: --cackles-- This guy's even
crazier then I am!
Professor: --turns off the
screen-- Enough! Everyone, I have a suggestion that may just
work!
Wilhelm: Oh no...
Professor: --takes
out six cell phones, each with a different colour-- BEHOLD! YOUR CALL
OF DESTINY AWAit's!
Blue Cloak: What the $$ is he
talking about?
Wilhelm: Don't ask...please...don't
ask...
Professor: --passes out the cell phones to Wilhelm,
Blue Cloak, Red Cloak, KOS-MOS, chaos, and Jr-- Each one of you
posses a special trait that, combined, will form an awesome
power!
Wilhelm: Please...make him stop...
Professor:
Each one of you now controls a piece of the ultimate weapon within
those cell phones...ERDE KAISER v2! --does a dance of
glee-
KOS-MOS: This is illogical. I am a machine --- it
makes no sense for a machine to pilot another machine.
Red
Cloak: What's a cell phone?
Wilhelm: An ancient device
that was made obselete with the UMN transmitters.
Red Cloak:
Right...
chaos: This is silly.
Professor: Red
Cloak! You control the Left Arm. Blue Cloak! You control the
Right Arm. KOS-MOS! You control the Left Leg. chaos!
You control the Right Leg. Jr! You control the Body.
Wilhelm! You are the Head. Together, you'll make...ERDE
KAISER v2!
chaos: Hey! Why does Wilhelm get to be the
head!
Wilhelm: I think it is quite fitting.
chaos:
Your blundering will cost us the universe! We don't need YOU as a
leader!
Wilhelm: Fine. Then Allen can be the Head.
Allen:
Ahhh! Keep me out of this!
chaos: Yes, Allen, YOU be the
Head! --snatches Wilhelm's cell phone away and hands it to
Allen-
Allen: N-no! I'm not going anywhere NEAR that thing!
--dashes off and hides behind Shion-
Professor: --throws a
fit-- NO NO NO! You can't switch places! It throws off
EVERYTHING!
chaos: --sighs and hands back the cell
phone to Wilhelm-- Fine...
Wilhelm: Professor, once again,
I have my doubts about your "marvelous weapons"...
Shion:
As much as I would usually agree, the original Erde Kaiser HAS proven
instrumental in many a defeat of the past...
Wilhelm:
--sighs and turns back to the Professor-- Fine, what do we have to
left to lose...
Professor: --dances with unabated
exuberance-- GREAT! OK, now all you have to do is dial your
codewords and say "Dialing Justice --- ERDE KAISER!"
Blue
Cloak: Wait, what's our codewords?
Wilhelm: Ridiculous.
I am not going to even whisper those words.
Professor:
--throws another fit-- NONONONO! You all KNOW your codewords once you
touched the cell phone, and how to operate ERDE KAISER v2! It's just
the way things ARE!
Red Cloak: He's...He's right! I know my
codeword!
KOS-MOS: My neural network must be
malfunctioning, because I too now retain this knowledge.
Professor:
--dances-- Yes! Yes! Now you're getting it! So...hop to it!
Part 60
Wilhelm: --sighs VERY deeply and punches in some numbers, then holds up the cell phone-- Calling...Justice! Erde Kaiser, summon forthe!
--Wilhelm glances over to the Professor, who simply nods with a smile of acceptance. The rest of the Erde Kaiser recepients preform the same procedure. Limbs of Erde Kaiser appear from seeming out of nowhere, and orbit the Elsa II. One by one, the members of the cell phone-equipped group get teleported into their respective parts. The limbs then start orbiting around each other.--
Wilhelm: Form! Body! --the body part
transforms into the body of Erde Kaiser-
Jr:
Ready!
Wilhelm: Form! Legs and feet! --the leg parts
transform into the legs of Erde Kaiser and attach to body-
KOS-MOS:
Affirmative.
chaos: Yeah, whatever.
Wilhelm:
Form! Arms and hands! --the arm parts transform into the arms of Erde
Kaiser and also attach to the body-
Red & Blue Cloak:
Ready!
Wilhelm: And I'll form...THE HEAD! --Wilhelm's part
transforms into the head of Erde Kaiser, attaching it'self
uptop-
chaos: --mumbles-- I could have been the
head...
Wilhelm: Together, we make...
All Six
Together: ERDE KAISER!
Wilhelm: --slumps back in his
chair-- $#$# that old robot's implanted memories...I sounded
quite...moronic...
chaos: --appears on screen-- Don't have
to tell me twice!
Admiral Matthews: --appears on another
screen-- As fer as I'm concerned, ya all are MORONS!
Jr:
--appears on yet another screen-- Enough! We have to save
MOMO!
Wilhelm: --all three screens disappear-- Right.
First, let's get rid of that lunatic, Albedo.
--Albedo readies his own gigantic robot Simeon, undaunted by the glaring size of this Erde Kaiser v2. The humungous patchwork robot was almost as big as D.A.O.S., and about 5x as big as Simeon.--
Albedo:
Bring...it...on!
Wilhelm: Arms! Tear
him...apart!
--The massive Erde Kaiser grabs either side of Simeon and pulls with all it's might.--
Albedo: Mwhaha! Do you really think you can break the super all--ehh!
--Even the invincible Simeon was no match for the might of Erde Kaiser, as it snapped in two and exploded in a glorious blaze.--
Blue Cloak: We did it!
chaos: We
destroyed Simeon, yes, but...
Albedo:
Mwhahahaahahahahahaha! --laughter appears in the minds of
everyone-
Albedo: You've done EXACTLY what I expected of
you! Now, I can start seeding the will of U-DO just in time for
D.A.O.S. to destroy the universe! MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Jr:
MOMO...
chaos: $#$# him!
Wilhelm: As much as I
wished to avoid this, we must stop D.A.O.S.
KOS-MOS:
Affirmative. Angling legs towards current location of D.A.O.S.
Jr:
MOMO! Hang on, we're coming!
chaos: Alright, here we
go!
--Erde Kaiser slowly makes it way towards D.A.O.S., which had paused to watch the defeat of Simeon.--
KOS-MOS:
Say...chaos...
chaos: What is it, KOS-MOS? I don't think
this is necessarily a good time to chat...
KOS-MOS:
Affirmative. However, we may not get another chance if my
calculations are correct. I have something important to
discuss.
chaos: --sighs-- Yeah, what is it?
KOS-MOS:
You remember my irrational outbreaks of emotions and violence
earlier, especially with Jr?
chaos: Yeah? I thought they
were part of your new emotional matrix...
KOS-MOS:
Affirmative. However, they are not part of my normal responses. You
see...I am...pregnant.
All 5 Together: WHAT!
Shion:
My KOS-MOS...pregnant!
Red Cloak: How is it even
possible!
chaos: Eh...?
Part 61
KOS-MOS: Affirmative. It is part of the upgrades
from Shion and Allen Jr. In fact, you requested it, chaos...
chaos:
I don't remem--oh, right.
KOS-MOS: In fact, it was the
future you that...that...
chaos: What! Well when if I ever
get my hands on me, then I will slap myself silly!
Wilhelm:
I could assist you with that procedure.
chaos: Oh, shut
up!
KOS-MOS: You are...displeased...
chaos: No!
I'm just joking. Actually, this is all quite funny, really...it was
only recently that Nephilim finally granted my wish and made me a
woman again!
Wilhelm: So you ARE the fruitest.
Blue
Cloak: Hahahaha! chaos finally became a girl! --laughs
hysterically-
Hammer: You owe me 40 GP.
Admiral
Matthews: Yeah, yeah...
Tony: You mean I kissed a
GIRL!
Hammer & Matthews & Shion & Allen:
Tony!
Tony: I'm back! But not so insane this time...
chaos:
You may have kissed a girl, but what you felt from it was REAL.
Tony:
--develops a nervous twitch, then runs away screaming again--
AHHHHHH!
KOS-MOS: --manages to emulate a smile-- It seems
the future is unfolding differently...but in a good way.
Wilhelm:
Well, let's add another item to that list, shall we?
--Erde Kaiser flies in front of D.A.O.S., blocking it's access to the planet-sized Vector Industrial Complex.--
Jr: MOMO!
Don't do this!
D.A.O.S.: Your authority is not recognized.
Audio communication blocked.
--D.A.O.S. leaps at Erde Kaiser, and the two start a power struggle. Erde Kaiser starts buckling a little, it's gears making horrible creaking noises, as if they were about to fly apart.--
Jr: --$#$# it!
Blue
Cloak: It's too strong! We can't hold out much longer!
KOS-MOS:
I estimate we will fly apart in 15 seconds.
Red Cloak: Jr!
We must destroy D.A.O.S.!
Jr: NO! MOMO is in there!
Red
Cloak: Are you willing to let the universe be destroyed for your
little girlfriend!
Jr: YES!
Wilhelm: Well,
I am not. Red Cloak, Blue Cloak, break us from this futile
struggle!
--Erde Kaiser bashes the gigantic robot's hands away and retreats backwards, almost starting a freefall down onto Vector Industrial Complex.--
Wilhelm: Now! Form Flaming Sword!
--The two hands cup together, which cause sparks to fly inbetween them. As they seperate, a sword of fire is created.--
Jr: Please! Don't hurt MOMO!
Wilhelm:
It was inevitable...ATTACK!
--Erde Kaiser rushes D.A.O.S. with it's flaming sword. D.A.O.S. braces it'self for the onslaught, as Erde Kaiser raises the massive sword, and preforms a mighty slice which litters the space with a wall of flame. The sword comes to rest upon the arm of D.A.O.S., causing a slight dent in the invincible robot...then snaps in two. Fragments of the sword fly in all directions, some even causing havoc down in Vector Industrial Complex.--
Wilhelm: This...isn't good.
chaos:
Hah! I knew you would screw up! I should have been the
Head!
Part 62
--D.A.O.S. grips the Erde Kaiser firmly with both hands. The six pilots watch in horror as the palm cannons open up, and a horrifying beam of destruction consumes the mighty robot. The Erde Kasier shatters into it's component parts, flying out in all directions.--
Wilhelm: There's no hope now...
--D.A.O.S. turns back to Vector Industrial Complex and aims it's palm cannons down at the unsuspecting planetoid. A huge ray of destructive energy slices the artificial planet in two, causing it to explode with a brilliant flash.--
chaos: --$#$# it! All those people...
D.A.O.S.: All systems are in working order. Test run complete. Switching to full power. Objective --- Annihiliation of all life in the universe.
chaos:
KOS-MOS...I am sorry...
KOS-MOS: It's alright. I've faced
the end of the universe once before, perhaps I will survive it
again.
--D.A.O.S. slowly powers up, causing it's body to glow with an eerie light. Just as D.A.O.S. is about to unleash it's full fury, it inexplicitably stops, as if held down by some force.--
Shion: What's going on?
Blue Cloak:
Something is holding it down!
Nephilim: The Gnosis.
Red
Cloak: The Gnosis!
--The aura of D.A.O.S. strengthens a bit, causing a sea of Gnosis to appear before the group. The Gnosis seemed to be attracted to D.A.O.S., as they cling as if it was their mother.--
Nephilim: Yes, the Gnosis.
Admiral
Matthews: What is goin' on here!
Nephilim:
KOS-MOS, perhaps you would like to explain.
KOS-MOS: Affirmative. The Zohar creates energy through actualizing future phenomona. The Gnosis are drawn to the energy of the Zohar, like moths to a flame. Since D.A.O.S. will destroy the universe, there is no future from which the Zohar could preform it's function. D.A.O.S. and Shion are the only two entities left who can produce the same type of energy of which the Gnosis crave so. Obviously, D.A.O.S. produces more energy then Shion.
Shion:
Me...?
Nephilim: Yes. You are a child of the
universe.
Shion: A child of the...universe...
Admiral
Matthews: ARGH! My head feels like it's goin' to explode! --takes
a LONG drink from his flask-
--D.A.O.S. struggles with the Gnosis clinging to it, but to no avail. More and more Gnosis attach themselves to the gigantic robot, causing D.A.O.S. to appear as if it was more Gnosis then machine. In a final effort to rid it'self of the assaulting Gnosis, D.A.O.S. reaches out with it's hand and split's open a hole in space. A bright flash of light appears, leaving behind...--
Wilhelm: Ab--Abel's Ark!
chaos:
What!
Old Seaman: Yar!
--...a rowboat with an old seaman in it. The seaman has a long, white beard and wears a traditional sailor's uniform.--
Hammer: Hey
Admiral, a relative of yours? --chuckles-
Admiral Matthews:
Ah, shaddup!
Wilhelm: THAT is Abel's Ark!
chaos:
Yep.
Wilhelm: Then you are Abel, I presume?
Old
Seaman: No, I be the old seaman, yar!
Wilhelm: ...My
whole life has been in pursuit of a...a...rowboat and some crusty old
sailor?
Old Seaman: Yar!
Part 63: Finale
D.A.O.S.: Harnessing power of Abel's Ark to
boost Wave emulation...error, something is blocking power intake.
Old
Seaman: That be me, yar!
--The Gnosis completely cover D.A.O.S., and start trying to eat through it's seemingly incincible hull to get to the source of the power they crave.--
D.A.O.S.: Power enhancement ineffective. Scenario analysis comencing...scenario analysis complete. New Objective --- Termination of Omega-1 chassis, which will result in the annihiliation of all matter in the universe. Engaging self-destruct protocols...
Jr: MOMO!
No, she'll be killed!
Admiral Matthews: Yeah, along with
the rest of the universe, ya MORON!
Jr: I have to save
her!
Ziggy: Me too! --runs out an open airlock, then
immediatly starts suffocating-- Hmm...it seems there is...no
oxygen...in...spa--- --explodes-
chaos: This is getting out
of hand...
Jr: Don't worry MOMO, I'm coming!
--Jr uses the power left in the body of the disassembled Erde Kaiser to push himself to ramming speed, straight for the cockpit of D.A.O.S. The two collide head-on, throwing Jr head-first into the cockpit. Somehow, he finds himself in one piece, sitting in the lap of MOMO.--
MOMO: JUNIOR! I thought...-sniff-...I
thought you were dead! --hugs Jr tightly-
Jr: --hugs her
back-- Not yet, my little panty cakes...
--With Jr's act of bravery (or stupidity), the Gnosis finally get their chance to invade the innards of D.A.O.S. They all attach themselves to the Wave Emulator, sucking up it's power for themselves.--
D.A.O.S.:
Error. Power output...failing...
Old Seaman: Yar! Take
that, you abomination! Yar!
--Back in the Elsa II, Nephilim starts glowing with an unearthly green light.--
chaos:
Is it time yet, boss?
Old Seaman: Yar! Indeed it
be!
Nephilim: Yes. Let time...return.
--With those final words, Nephilim's body explodes with an aura of green energy, engulfing everything affected by D.A.O.S. Everyone feels themselves slipping away, as if they were both dying and being born at the same time.--
Allen: I love you,
Shion...
Shion: I love you too, Allen...
chaos: I
truly love you, KOS-MOS...don't ever forget that!
KOS-MOS:
Our love has survived one universe, it will surely survive the
next.
Tony: I love you...Matthews...
Admiral
Matthews: Oh fer cryin' out loud!
--As MOMO and Jr fade away along with everything else, they both make one last confession...--
Jr: I love you, MOMO.
MOMO:
I love you too...you big pervert!
--And so, everything stopped.--
--...It was a quiet day aboard the Durandal II. Shion and Allen were studying design schematics for KOS-MOS, Ziggy was resting in his quarters, and MOMO and Jr were playing a board game. chaos walks in on Shion, Allen, MOMO, and Jr.--
chaos:
Hey everyone, having fun today?
Jr: Boor-ring!
MOMO:
--giggles-- Jr, you're so silly!
Nephilim: They shall remember nothing of their former lives. This is the way it has to be. --communicates telepathically to chaos-
KOS-MOS: --walks in-- Good morning, Shion.
--chaos sighs and turns away from KOS-MOS.--
chaos: Well, at least
she'll become the KOS-MOS I love one day... --thinks to
himself-
KOS-MOS: Good morning, chaos.
chaos:
Eh!
--chaos whips around to see KOS-MOS winking at him with a sultry smile. Her expression immediatly turns back to the sober one she always uses, yet deep within her eyes, chaos can see a hint of the KOS-MOS he fell in love with.--
Nephilim: Well...maybe not everything.
The End.
