Disclaimer: I'm just having some fun, nobody sue.
A/N: The focus is on Dream Team, second to last episode, also second to last chapter. The two scenes of Mac confronting Harm in his office are quoted from the episode. You guys are the absolute best! Your reviews send me sky high each time!
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It's been going on for weeks. Ever since the night Mac took on the job of a shadow, the show seemed to play out on its own. Mac would drive almost every other night to the hospital a few hours after she knew Harm drove there. She'd take some laundry, make sure he had water and some snacks available, talk with the nurse on duty for a while, sit with Mattie if Harm was asleep then head home for a short night's sleep. By now she knew every nurse in the ICU by name, along with their life story and they knew she was Harm's shadow and both Harm and Mattie's guardian angel. Even Mattie's doctor, though he took few night shifts, knew Mac and the story behind the woman who, along with a tall father figure, became a fixture on their floor.
Nurse Lea, as she liked to be called, took many night shifts and soon became a good friend to Mac. On nights Mac didn't make it for whatever reason, Lea left her a message the following morning, filling her in on what she missed.
True to Lea's advice, Mac made sure to help Harm only in small things he either wouldn't notice or dismiss. After a week she decided to bring Harriet to her side and told her what she'd been doing. Harriet was only too happy to help in what she could, which turned out to be making food for Harm which Mac put in his apartment. She knew Harm would be much less hesitant in accepting help from Harriet, especially in the form of food. About once a week, Mac brought a meal to the hospital as well. She left it with the nurse in charge, who in turn convinced Harm that some other nurse left her food and went home already and that it would be a waste to throw it out.
Things weren't any better in the office and Harm wasn't making it easy to help. Though she wasn't surprised, it still warmed Mac's heart that absolutely everyone (with the possible exception of Vukovic) pitched in and tried to help their colleague in a way that wouldn't get them thrown out the door. All in all, headquarters was running smoothly, so the General wasn't complaining about a certain unfocused Commander.
Interaction between Harm and Mac was minimal to her displeasure. He seemed to avoid her as best as he could, opting to be completely professional. This fact made Mac even happier that she'd clued Harriet in to her secret, for the petite woman's support was endless and exactly what Mac needed whenever she was close to giving up and requesting a transfer.
Lea's morning messages told Mac when Harm would have a better day, all things considered, and on those days Mac put her best face forward and tried to reach out to the man who used to be her rock and now seemed to crumble to the ground. Harriet was the one who picked Mac up after those attempts.
"Ma'am, you just have to be strong for him right now. He needs you even though he won't let you near, you know it as well as I do."
"I know, Harriet, I know."
"Well then, what's that frown for? Suck it up, Marine!"
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Oh god, Harm's sleeping at his desk. Lea told me it had been a rough night at the ICU. Mattie was supposed to be moved, since she still wasn't waking up. The minute Harm heard about it he put up a fight Lea swears she rarely saw, even from parents. There was no doubt he was going to win and Mattie stayed put.
I walk in and close the door behind me not so quietly. He jolts awake.
"Hey. Wow, I must have dozed off for a second." No kidding.
"You work all day, and you sit up with Mattie all night, drive back and forth to Blacksburg, it's a wonder you can function at all." That was supposed to sound more sympathetic... I can't help it, this guy's driving me nuts!
"Oh, yeah, I'm real amazing."
"You know you won't do Mattie any good if you fall asleep and drive under an 18-wheeler on the I-81."
"That's not gonna be happening, Mac." he says around a huge yawn. I'd shout 'ha' and point in his face if I let my inner voice speak up. Instead I sigh.
"What's her doctor saying?"
"Same thing. Spinal injury, minimal brain damage."
"Well, minimal's good, right?" If I could just hold him right now...
"If it's so damn minimal, why won't she wake up?" that's right, Harm, let it out. Who am I kidding, once again, I'm the one on the verge of tears.
"Maybe you should take a few days leave, I'm sure the General would understand..."
He only shows me the distinguished pile of files on his desk. "See this backlog? Not to mention this case I was just handed with Vukovic..."
The conversation moves to the twerp and I don't like where Harm's taking it, so I shove it back in his face. "We haven't slept together if that's what you're asking. Go home, Harm, get some sleep."
He says something about a meeting then leaves the room, leaving me sitting there in his guest chair, wondering what I'm going to do next.
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Every time I think Vukovic's getting bearable, I'm proven wrong. You'd think I would've learned by now not to give him even an inch. Vukovic doesn't even come close to Harm, even in his uglier times, how dare he say I see Harm in him? To be fair, I could probably see Harm in a blank wall, I'm thinking about him so much lately. I shake my head as I walk into the bullpen. Walking by Harm's office I am forced to stop and make sure I'm seeing what I think I'm seeing. Has he fallen asleep again?
"Come in, I'm not sleeping." He's peering at me between two fingers, and for a second I'm reminded of a child at a scary movie. I hope I won't scare him away.
"Long day?"
"Aren't they all?" he says almost under his breath.
"So, are you going to see Mattie later?" I go for the casual approach. I know damned well what he's going to do, I've got it down to each second by now.
"Probably."
"I'd like to come with you." God I hope that didn't sound like I just heard it.
"That's not necessary." I could slap him, he doesn't even bother looking my way, too absorbed in some file and his computer.
"I know it's not necessary, but I'd like to."
"Another time." This time he does throw a look my way, and I'm wishing he'd have stuck to the computer screen. I've never seen so much exasperation in a look from him. God, Harm! For some reason I can't hold back like I would usually.
"When I needed support, you were there and I pushed you away, so I suppose I deserve this."
"I'm not pushing you away, Mac, and this isn't about payback." Right... I believe you! Try fooling someone who doesn't know you as well as I do next time.
"Harm, you can't keep going on like this." Something about this speech sounds familiar... "You have to let someone in. Not me, fine, but someone." I'm practically begging. He doesn't even bother answering though, just gives me this look... oh god, that's exactly what he said to me back then! How sad is this? Well, this is going nowhere, better luck next time, Marine.
"Say hi to Mattie for me." I think I see him nod his acknowledgement, but it could just be my imagination. I'm out the door, hoping against hope he'll call me back into his office.
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"MacKenzie."
"Mac? It's Lea."
"Hey! Is everything ok?" She doesn't sound like she's about to deliver bad news.
"Everything is wonderful! Mattie woke up!"
"Oh my god! Oh, thank god! I.. I.. this is great! Lea, thank you so much for calling me, it's the best thing anyone told me in quite a while."
"I know, dear. You should have seen your Commander, I thought he was going to pass out." I can only imagine because that would probably never happen.
"I bet. So what's going to happen now?"
"Now we keep monitoring and hope Mattie's up to some more fighting. She's still got quite a ways ahead of her, you know."
"She's a fighter, Lea, and she's got at least two more backing her up."
"Don't I know it. Okay, I need to get back to my duties, I just knew you'd want to hear the good news."
"You have no idea what this means to me, Lea, thank you so much."
"Oh, I think I have one idea... I'll talk to you tomorrow, bye."
I actually let out a short happy squeal, as I sit on the couch and bring my knees up. It's going to get better. Now I just have to wait for Harm to come tell me the news and I know we'll get back on track.
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Well, it's been almost 24 hours since Lea's call. I saw Harm fleetingly at work but he was too busy with the case to really talk and I couldn't very well walk up to him and ask him why he wasn't telling me that Mattie woke up. So I waited patiently, but didn't bother hiding the small smile that became glued to my face.
There's a knock at the door and I wonder if my psychic powers are this good. I open the door to find a very uncomfortable looking Harm on my doorstep. If I hadn't talked to Lea I would've feared the worst. Why's he this fidgety?
"Hey, come on in."
"Thanks."
I have to play along and react to how he's behaving, not to what I know from my sources...
"What's wrong, Harm...? Mattie...?" Not a bad actress if I do say so myself. That seems to shock him out of his funk and finally I see traces of a real smile. God, I missed this smile.
"Mattie woke up yesterday." It took you long enough.
"Harm, that's great!" I practically scream and pull him into a tight hug. We're not at work and I need this just as much as I suspect he does. Harm immediately pulls me into him and I'm not inclined to let go anytime soon.
"Mac, would you, uh, like to come with me to the hospital tomorrow..? I think Mattie would be happy to see you." That's a peace offering if I ever heard one. If he could see the grin on my face he'd raise a brow, but I'm not finished hugging yet. I squeeze him closer one last time then slightly pull back to look at him. "I'd love to."
Almost reluctantly he pulls completely away and suddenly looks like a lost boy. Motherly instinct kicking in, I take his hand and lead him to the couch.
"So, how're you holding up?"
"I'll be fine now."
"What doing to happen?" It's always been like this. I'm always the voice of reason and he's talking in riddles and hints.
"I'm going to petition for custody again. This time, I'll make sure she stays with me untill she's 18." 'Atta boy, knew you'd listen to reason eventually.
"What about Tom?" I have to ask again.
"He doesn't deserve a second chance," I can feel the anger emanating from him though his voice is calm, "for Mattie's sake I need him to get better, but I'll be damned if I let him break her heart again."
I squeeze his hand in silent support. I know firsthand how easy it is to give into the need at hard times, but Tom should've resisted it for Mattie, he still had something very important to stay sober for.
"Well, I'd better go, I want to be at the hospital early tomorrow morning to talk to the Doc and still make it back to the office on time."
Harm is already on his way to the door when I manage to form the words, "so, when are you picking me up?"
He whirls around to face me. "You want to come in the morning?"
"Going back on your invite, flyboy?" I just have to tease.
"No, no, I mean, I just thought, never mind. Pick you up at 0530?"
I simply nod and follow him to the door. Staying inside when he steps out I watch him walk away from my door. When he's almost out of sight and I'm about to close the door, I see him stop and double back in my direction. I look back inside, but find nothing of his that he left behind. I take a few steps to meet him halfway. "Did you forget something?"
"Yes." He seems somewhat unsure and I'm officially lost. "Thanks, Mac."
The smile spreads my lips automatically. A peace offering and then thanks? Will wonders never cease? Giving into the impulse, I place a barely there peck on his lips.
"You're welcome. Thanks for sharing the news with me."
Once again a hint of his smile warms my insides. He walks away and I stay in the hallway 10 seconds after he left, my mind a contented blank.
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0530 sharp and I'm waiting on the curb. I know Harm won't be late this time. At 0531 I see his car approaching. I get inside and he keeps driving as if he never stopped.
"Morning, Mac."
"Good morning. Sleep well?"
His eyes on the road, he nods then points to a bag next to my feet.
"I brought coffee and bagels." I'm impressed and let him know. Coffee always tastes better when it's really early and there's a long day ahead. "Oh, bless you." I sigh contentedly and turn to him just in time to see a small grin on his lips.
The drive passes with an easy silence and some small talk that goes nowhere.
I let Harm step off the elevator first and follow him slowly, I want him to have a second with Mattie plus I want to see who's manning the nurse station. Harm's in with Mattie and I send Lea a wink, which she returns. If Lea had the night shift, I am sure everything's okay.
I enter Mattie's room to find Mattie awake and smiling.
"Mac!"
"Hey, Mattie, nice to see you awake, you gave us all quite a scare."
"Yeah, sorry about that. Harm probably wasn't that easy to deal with either, huh?"
Harm huffs good naturedly, "I'm still in the room you know."
I just ignore him and squeeze Mattie's hand, "You have no idea, kiddo, it's great to have you back."
"I'm going to go find the Doc so you two can talk behind my back."
"Good." I say and chuckle. Mattie's smile widens and Harm sighs in mock exasperation and walks out the room.
"So, how're you feeling, really?" she's probably sugarcoating for Harm's sake.
I can tell she wants to shrug her shoulders and her face turns somber. "I'm getting used to the idea of the whole recovery process... and to dad's..."
She doesn't have to finish. "It'll be okay, Mattie, he'll be sober again. I speak from experience when I say it's possible. And Harm will be there every step of the way."
"Yeah, I know. What about you?" I try not to let my shock show.
"If you want me to." I answer honestly.
"I know you've been coming to visit without Harm knowing." This time I can't even keep my mouth shut and my jaw falls open, to which Mattie smiles again and explains. "I had this feeling you were here so I asked the nurse if you were. She told me about your visits and how you helped Harm even though he wouldn't accept any help."
What am I supposed to say to this? No one was supposed to find out. "It's okay, Mac, I won't tell him if you don't want me to."
I didn't even know I was holding my breath until she said that. "Thanks Mattie, I just.. don't know how I would explain... I mean... he was so stubborn!"
"Yeah, but you love him anyway." If the kid isn't careful that smile could split her face in half. I don't think there's any point in denying that by now and I smile back in acknowledgement.
I look up to see Harm looking at us through the window to ICU.
"Well, I'm gonna give you and Harm some time alone, while I find out who's the nurse that snitched and what her home address is." I joke and place a kiss on Mattie's forehead. "Remember, the sooner you get better, the sooner we can go shopping together."
"Thanks, Mac. For everything. On Harm's behalf too."
I smile at the bright kid and finally leave the room as Harm enters.
I spend the next 15 minutes chatting with Lea and watching Harm and Mattie. As I see Harm getting up I bid Lea goodbye and go inside to see Mattie once again before we leave for work.
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The last chapter will probably be up sometime next week. Criticism good and bad always appreciated!