Title: Boy-Who-Lived: Father-To-Be
Author: SweetMercy
Rating: M
Warnings: mpreg, slash, has naughty swear words!
Pairings: RL/HP but has references to others
Chapter 12: Emotional Outburst
When Harry next opened his eyes he was lying on his back in the Hospital Wing. A gentle mummer of conversation reached his ears but was drowned out by a bleeping sound that, when he listened closely, was beeping in time with the own beating of his heart. There was also a soft thudding noise that was sounding a lot faster and Harry guessed it belonged to something that was monitoring his babies' heart beats.
"Healer Neeson! He's awake!"
Harry turned his head and found that he was not alone; far from it in fact. Ron, Ginny, and Sirius were all sitting on the bed to his right, all looking thoroughly relieved that he was awake. Hermione sat in the chair next to his bed, her eyes puffy and red. Dumbledore and Mrs Weasley were sat on the bed to his left, and Remus was sat in another chair near by.
"You gave us quite a scare Mr Potter," said Healer Neeson as she scurried over to him with a smoking goblet full of a blue liquid.
"What happened?" asked Harry weakly, pushing himself into a sitting position.
"Drink this now," said the Healer handing him the potion. Harry drank it, resisting the urge to gag. It tasted like warm slime. When he had drained the goblet full, he turned to look at the others.
"What happened?" he asked again. "Why am I here?"
"Well," said Dumbledore, as the Healer took Harry's temperature, "You collapsed."
Healer Neeson made a disapproving noise as she looked down at Harry.
"I told you not to over exert yourself didn't I?" she said. "I told you that stress wasn't good for the babies did I not?"
"Are the babies alright?" asked Harry with a sinking feeling in his heart, but the Healer nodded.
"You were very lucky we found you in time," she told him. "'Course," she added, "It wasn't that hard to find you."
Harry looked at the others questioningly as she bustled off.
"The whole castle started to shake," said Remus and it was then that Harry noticed how tired he looked. "We all thought it was some kind of Earthquake until things just started to blow up on the spot. We realised someone must be generating a lot of uncontrolled magic."
"The whole school was in uproar," said Ron. "Everyone thought it was a Death Eater attack."
"We were able to pinpoint the origin of the power surge, so to speak, and we rushed off to Gryffindor Tower," Dumbledore explained. "That's when we found you lying unconscious on the floor. By that time, however, everything was still again. We immediately rushed you to the Hospital Wing and sent for Aurora Neeson as Madam Pomfrey hasn't much experience dealing with male pregnancies."
"We were so worried about you Harry," sobbed Hermione.
Harry sat there stunned into silence. He couldn't believe his ears. How could he have done that?
"You must have been really angry and upset to generate that much power," said Dumbledore, no doubt reading his thoughts.
"The whole castle shook," said Ginny. "Tables and chairs were moving and the windows were exploding."
"Was anyone hurt?" Harry managed to ask.
"Only a few cuts and bruises," said Dumbledore. "Nothing Madam Pomfrey can't fix."
"But the pain in my stomach," said Harry remembering how he had doubled over, "What was that?"
"That, Mr Potter," said Healer Neeson coming back over and Harry saw Madam Pomfrey on the other side of the room attending to a few students, "Was a false contraction caused from stress."
Harry looked away from her and stared at his bed sheets. He had endangered the lives of his own un-born children, all because he couldn't control his temper. He knew he had been finding it difficult to keep his emotions in check, what with all the hormones flying all over the place, but it didn't feel right to blame it on his condition. This was his fault.
"I'm really sorry," he said sadly, "I didn't mean to…"
"We are not blaming you in the slightest dear boy," said Dumbledore kindly. "These things happen. You're only accountable for the things you do of your own free will; where you choose and can understand the consequences. Stress can take over even the best of us, causing us to lose control of ourselves and of the situation. And our stress is usually caused by others in the first place," he added as an after thought.
"But I shouldn't have lost control like that," he said dejectedly. "I could have really hurt someone; I could have injured the babies. You kept telling me to control my anger but I couldn't and I…"
"Once again, it can not be helped and is therefore not your fault Harry," he said with a kind smile. "Now, if you will excuse me," he said getting to his feet, "I have to go and fix the windows in my office; they seem to have fallen out."
He smiled at Harry with an amused look before setting off down the ward. Harry smiled apologetically. As Harry watched him go, he noticed that all the curtains had been drawn across the large windows and many candles had been lit about the large room.
"How long have I been in here?" he asked, figuring that it was far from morning now.
"About 10 hours," Remus informed him. "We've been coming and going all day, checking in on you to see if there was any change. Dumbledore had only just returned when you woke up."
"Oh Harry, you've had us all so worried," said Mrs Weasley pulling him into a hug. "As soon as I heard I rushed straight over, and Sirius here was in the area already so he was able to pop right in."
"I'm just glad you're ok," Sirius smiled. "I was scared something really bad was going to happen to you."
"Well I feel really bad for what I did," said Harry. "How could I just lose control like that?"
"It's not your fault Harry," said Sirius, perching himself on the edge of Harry's bed and wrapping an arm around him.
"But if I hadn't of…"
"Don't blame yourself Harry," said Remus, placing a hand over his, "It's the worst thing you could do."
Harry sighed but chose not to argue the point further. No matter what they said to him he still felt responsible. He had let Malfoy get to him; Malfoy, of all people. That boy lived to cause trouble and Harry had let himself fall prey to him. Maybe it wasn't his fault after all, maybe it was Malfoy's for winding him up…he knew that wasn't true but it felt a hell of a lot better to pretend it was.
"What I'm more worried about are those babies of yours," said Ginny seriously.
"As am I," said Healer Neeson smiling at Ginny. "You could have caused some serious damage to those babies and especially to yourself. You need to keep your blood pressure down, otherwise your hearts going to be pumping all the blood around your body but not to the babies', and then they'll suffer from lack of oxygen. Keep your stress levels down Harry. It's very important."
Harry nodded but didn't say anything as shame flooded through him. Malfoy's fault, he reminded himself.
"Now," said Healer Neeson, "If it's safe to move on from this unfortunate incident, I would like to remind you that now is the best time to start preparing for the birth and what comes after. I realise that right now isn't the time to talk about it so I will send you a few leaflets about classes that I really think you should attend.
"I have left Madam Pomfrey instructions on what to do in case you have anymore false contractions and there are a few potions in her office that will help with the pain."
She stood up and wrapped her green cloak around her before turning back to them.
"Hopefully I shall see you at the classes," she said. "If you can't make them then I will try and come here to see you in private. If, for whatever reason I can't do that, I have left information with Madam Pomfrey and this wonderful young lady here Ginny," she said, smiling down a Ginny. "She defiantly knows her stuff, this one."
"I have to get going as well," said Sirius regretfully as Healer Neeson disappeared through the doors. "Order business, you know?"
"Thanks for coming," Harry said with a small smile. "I really appreciate it."
"I would spend the night," he said, "Just in case you needed anything, but…" he sighed. "You'll be ok?"
Harry nodded.
"You sure?" he asked. "I hate leaving you like this."
"I'll be fine Sirius," he smiled and he hugged the older man.
"Right, well, I'll be off then," he said. "Make sure you don't over do yourself. And take extra special care of him," he added to the others.
Soon after Sirius had left, Molly had to leave to get back to the house. Fred and George were visiting for a couple of days and she didn't like leaving them alone, partially because of the Death Eaters, mostly because they were Fred and George and were most likely to blow up the house if left to their own devices for too long. She said her goodbyes, gave Harry an extra hug, and was on her way.
"Well Harry," said Remus with a small smile. "You seem to have had quite the first day back."
"It's kind of funny when you think about it," said Ron. "You made the whole castle shake. How cool is that?"
"You do need to keep an eye on your stress levels though," said Ginny. "You could seriously injure yourself."
"Speaking of which," said Hermione, "What caused it all? You went off with Malfoy before Charms but didn't return when he did. What happened?"
Harry opened his mouth but closed it again without saying anything. Before he could think of an answer however, Remus had gotten up.
"I'll leave you three alone to talk," he said smiling, and Harry smiled up at him gratefully. "I'll come back later on this evening to see you. Come along Ginny."
Although Ginny got up and followed Remus out of the hall without a complaint, she looked back at them with a confused, yet suspicious face.
"So?" said Ron, once the door had closed. "What did Malfoy say?"
And Harry told them everything that had happened in that empty classroom with Malfoy, feeling the same anger boil up again as he did so. When he was done, Hermione looked shocked and Ron angry.
"How the hell is he doing it?" Ron demanded. "How on Earth can he know you slept with Sirius as well?"
"I have no idea," sighed Harry, "But he knows which is defiantly not good."
"And he brought up the threat of the Daily Prophet again?" asked Hermione and Harry nodded.
"Well, that's simple," said Ron. "If the babies are his just don't tell him."
"Ron, do you really think it's going to be that easy?" Hermione asked sharply. "He'll probably want proof that they aren't his, and even then there's no saying he won't go to the papers anyway. This is Malfoy we're talking about."
"I want to know how he found out about Sirius," said Harry. "And why he was in Remus' office the other time."
"He might have seen you go in and decided to see what you were up to," suggested Ron.
"But what about Sirius?" asked Harry. "That was at Grimmauld Place. There's no way he could have got in there."
"Good point," muttered Ron. "It couldn't have been anything to do with Kreacher could it?"
"He's still in Sirius control," Harry told him. "And besides, he's ordered him to work at Hogwarts and take orders from me, hasn't he?"
"No, you can't go blaming house elves for this," said Hermione and Ron rolled his eyes. "Malfoy's definitely up to something if he knows about the two of them. I'm surprised he doesn't know about Dean."
"Maybe he does, he just isn't letting on yet," said Ron.
"But what if he tells somebody?" asked Harry desperately. "Something like that isn't going to stay a secret if Malfoy knows. If this gets out Sirius is going to be in a lot of trouble for having sex with his Godson and Remus is going to lose his job and I'll be expelled. Remus might even end up in Azkaban!"
"That's what I'm afraid of," muttered Hermione. "We'll just have to pray that he doesn't say anything."
"Speaking of Remus," said Ron, "Are you ok about your little 'revelation' from this morning?"
Harry had to think for a moment before he realised what Ron was going on about, but it soon came flooding back to him. It was hard to believe that he had actually woken up this morning in a good mood.
"The whole 'Remus is only with me because he wants a family' thing?" said Harry. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure you guys were right about that. Seems kind of stupid now that all this has happened."
They were able to talk a little while longer before Madam Pomfrey came and ushered them out. It was only then, however, that Harry realised how hungry he was. He hadn't eaten since breakfast.
Refusing to let him out of bed other than for toilet trips, Madam Pomfrey summoned a couple of House Elves to bring Harry some food and drink. Unsurprisingly it was Dobby and Kreacher who brought the food. Dobby practically bounced down the ward carrying what looked like a picnic basket, whist Kreacher stomped along behind him carrying a tray with drinks, muttering incoherently under his breath.
"Dobby has brought Harry Potter his late dinner!" smiled Dobby as he set the basket on Harry's bed and pulled out the contents. There was a large cob of crunchy bread, a small assortment of fruits and yoghurts, a whole fruit cake, a bar of Honeydukes Best Chocolate and, Harry smiled, a can of whipped cream to go with the Strawberries. Just what the babies needed.
As Dobby was pulling out a knife and fork, Kreacher reached the bed. Without a word he set down the tray he was carrying onto the bed side cabinet.
"Dobby received a list from a Miss Ginny Weasley which noted all the foods you were allowed Harry Potter sir," said Dobby. "But she said you were allowed a treat if you eat everything up." He pointed to the bar of chocolate and Harry smiled to himself.
"Thank you Dobby," he said. Kreacher placed a bowl of tomato soup in front of him and Harry reached for the bread.
"What would the young master like to drink?" asked Kreacher somewhat sullenly but Harry overlooked it.
"Just a glass of water please," he told him, dipping his bread into the steaming soup. Kreacher poured him some water and laid it next to his bed.
Harry continued to eat in silence feeling all the more uncomfortable and aware that Dobby, in his usual tea cosy hat, was just sitting on the bed beaming up at him with big, bright eyes, and Kreacher, in a new Hogwarts tea towel uniform, was stood next to him looking slightly insane, his big, sharp eyes bulging.
Unable to take anymore Harry turned to Kreacher.
"Will you go and get Remus Lupin for me please? If he's not busy," he told the elf and it bowed.
"Kreacher will do whatever the young master commands of him," he said, before adding under his breath, "Even though the young master is a nasty, unnatural brat to go and get pregnant. What would my poor Mistress say if she saw Kreacher serving scum like the Potter boy? The young master is of no relation to the Noble House of Black and my Master shouldn't make me serve such people."
"Kreacher will not talk like that about Harry Potter!" squeaked Dobby, but Kreacher gave Harry one last withering look before disappearing with a crack. Harry just rolled his eyes and turned back to his soup.
By the time Remus got there Harry was already half way through the cake Dobby had brought. He thanked the House Elves and they disappeared.
"Well Harry," smiled Remus sitting down on the bed, "No one can say it wasn't an interesting first day back."
"Tell me about it," said Harry. "Fruit cake?"
"Just a small piece then," he smiled, taking the slice offered to him.
"So," he said in between mouthfuls, "Are you going to enlighten me as to why you made the whole castle tremble?"
"Because I was stressed," he said shortly, swallowing the last bit of cake and pulling the strawberries over to him. He shook the can of cream and covered the strawberries.
"And you were stressed because…?"
"Malfoy," he told him.
"Harry," Remus sighed, nicking a cream-covered strawberry off Harry's plate, "I thought you had learnt to ignore whatever bullshit Malfoy comes out with."
"I had," said Harry, "But this time it wasn't bullshit."
Harry lay his spoon aside and considered the man in front of him. If Malfoy knew about them then surely Remus had the right to know. And it wasn't just that he had the right – Remus needed to know and he wouldn't put it passed Malfoy to milk it for all it was worth. He made his mind up and took a deep breath.
"Malfoy knows we slept together," he told him quietly as Madam Pomfrey had just passed by. Remus stared at him.
"Malfoy knows? How can he?"
"He said he was in your office and he, erm…well, he heard us," Harry muttered. He picked up the tray that lay across him and placed in onto the cabinet. He no longer had an appetite for the strawberries.
"He heard us? Oh my God…" Remus hid his face in his hands.
"Yeah," sighed Harry miserably.
"Is he going to tell anyone?"
"Hopefully not," muttered Harry awkwardly.
"Hopefully not? What does that mean? What did he say?"
"He just….he won't tell if…" How did Harry get himself into these situations at all? He really did bring it on himself.
"If what?" prompted Remus.
"Shut the curtains will you?" asked Harry, and Remus got up and drew the curtains around the bed, shielding them from prying eyes. He heard Remus mutter a silencing charm as well.
"If what?" asked Remus again, sitting himself back down on the bed.
"If…" Shit. He was going to have to tell him. He had to. Besides, Remus would rather hear it from Harry than Malfoy, right? And Harry wouldn't put it passed Malfoy to drop hints to his teacher…
"He won't tell anyone if the babies aren't his," Harry finished, resisting the urge to duck under the bed covers and hide away. Instead, he settled for fixing his eyes firmly on the bed sheets. If he didn't look at him then it would be better.
"If the babies aren't…Harry? What do you mean, 'he won't tell anyone if they're not his'?"
"I mean exactly what I said," Harry murmured.
"But why would they be his in the first place?" Harry could tell from the sound of his voice that he was shocked and hurt but was doing his best to cover it up with puzzlement as if he was trying to convince himself he had heard wrong.
"I slept with him," Harry said slowly, still not looking up. "He's possible father number 3."
Harry had fully expected an uncomfortable silence to follow after his admission, had been prepared to just sit there and hold his breath until Remus felt like talking things through, but he was wrong. Remus didn't seem to need time to process what Harry had just told him.
"Fucking hell Harry, why would you sleep with Malfoy? You know what he's like!"
The razor-sharp tone of Remus' voice made Harry look up at him and flinch. There was pain and disappointment reflecting in his amber eyes as he stared down at Harry.
"I'm sorry," Harry said in a hurt voice; he hated seeing Remus upset. He hated knowing that he was the one who had made him upset even more. "It just…happened."
When Remus didn't reply he carried on. "Look, you knew there were 3 others…"
"I didn't know someone like Malfoy would be one of them!" he scolded.
"It didn't mean anything," he cried, and Remus scoffed and looked away. "It's not like I don't regret it because I do! I hate living with the knowledge that I did it; I hate there being a possibility that they might be his babies. I hate this fucking mess I've gotten myself into! Remus, please!"
He flung out a hand and caught hold of Remus' for the older man had just stood up as if he was about to leave. Remus turned to look at Harry.
"Why did you do it Harry? Wasn't I good enough for you? You slept with him just after you slept with me so that must be why you did it!"
"Remus, no! Malfoy was a mistake, a stupid mistake! I don't even know why I did it! It didn't mean anything."
"He could tell everyone about us," he said, ignoring Harry. "We would both be in so much trouble."
"I was 16! I was of the legal age when it happened!"
"The legal age in the Wizarding World is 17, and besides, I'm still your teacher."
"He won't tell anyone," Harry sobbed. "He won't be the father, I just know it."
"You don't know that for sure Harry," said Remus quietly. "And what's to say he won't tell everyone anyway?"
"He won't," Harry said, praying to Merlin himself that he was right. "He wouldn't want everyone to know that he slept with me would he? If he tells the papers about us than they'll eventually find out about me and Malfoy won't they?"
"You think they'll believe that though?" asked Remus doubtfully.
"If they don't believe that then why should they believe that we slept together? We could just deny it; they have no proof, not unless they use Veritaserum."
"I don't know Harry…" sighed Remus, but he sat back down again which Harry took as a good sign.
"Please," he pleaded, "Just forget about Malfoy. He only wants to cause trouble."
"But if he's the father…"
"Would you still be with me if he was?" asked Harry.
"Of course I would Harry, you know that," he said, and he reached out and placed a loving hand on the boy's cheek. Harry covered the hand with his own.
"Malfoy really didn't mean anything you know," he said quietly. "None of the others did. But sleeping with you meant everything to me. It was the best thing I've ever done – it brought us together."
When Remus didn't say anything he looked up with teary eyes.
"You do love me don't you?" he asked quietly, almost a whisper.
"Of course I do," he said softly. "What could ever make you doubt that?"
"Something…this morning…you're not just with me because of, well, because of the babies are you?" Harry regretted saying it the moment it left his lips. How could this man in front of him, this man holding him so tenderly, be with him if he didn't love him?
"How can you even think that?" asked Remus, obviously hurt by the accusation.
"I don't know, it's just been such an emotional day…and I really love you Remus. I don't want to lose you."
"You're not going to lose me," he whispered, and he placed a soft, gentle kiss to Harry's lips.
"I'm sorry for being such an idiot," Harry muttered when they pulled away.
"You were right," he told him, lying down next to Harry on the bed and tracing a soft finger over Harry's lips. "It has been an emotional day for you. You can be an idiot if you want."
Harry placed a kiss to the roving finger and smiled, closing his eyes. "I'm not going to let it get to me anymore," he said. "I'm going to be happy and positive."
Remus chuckled softly and kissed Harry on his scar.
"Love you," he whispered, encircling his arms around Harry as the young man dozed off.
"Love you more," Harry muttered sleepily.
"That's not possible," Remus smiled, and he snuggled down into the bed and watched over Harry as he fell asleep.
A/N: I was just wondering; what countries are you all from? Is any from from England? (apart from me). Because I heard that America goes back to school/college soon, right?
Thanks for all your reviews, especailly all those in chapter 10. Thanks for all the name suggestions, they were great. I hadn't even heard of some of them - I love slightly unusal names. I went through a faze once when I wanted to call my future children (twin girls) Luna and Solar...go ahead, laugh at me. lol.
Have you ever cycled down a hill on your old bike you found hidden away in your shed and realised it didn't have working brakes? Only you realise the brakes don't work when you're already half way down the bloody hill and you can't stop. lol...yeah, I had a fun day.
Oh, and one more little random thing. The birth of the babies is in chapter 14 so we're almost there. Yay! And I've managed to write up to chapter 21 so far - i'm so proud of me right now.
Please review. Pretty Please. With a cherry on top.