Hey everybody, guess what I'm actually posting another chapter, great isn't it. Work has been good, social life has been dead, and cat has been insane, but that's nothing different. Finding time during the week to write is near impossible so that's why updates are coming weekly now instead of more frequently, sorry but them are the breaks.

Well that's all I got for now, hope you enjoy this installment.

X-X

Anata no Ichiban ni Naritai

Chapter 17 – Catching Up

Dazed, Akito walked down the darkened streets of one of the newly reclaimed lunar colonies, Ruri hanging over his shoulder. 'Ruri's been alive this whole time? She's been living with us and I've been training her since we left Mars. Why didn't she tell me?' He'd have asked her the answer had the young woman been conscious. Ruri's trip through the Boson tunnel and then attack had left her to weak to stay awake and Akito was forced to carry her. With his hands behind his back holding Ruri's behind, her legs sprouting out in front of him, a parody of extra limbs, Akito ran from the searchlights of the security detachment.

"That had been a few hours ago," Akito's tired voice echoed down the alleyway. He had too much to take in, too much to plan, and to little energy to do anything. Kicking at garbage that was in his way, Akito felt something he hadn't expected at learning of Ruri's survival. Anger. He was furious with her for hiding from him, didn't she know how much it hurt him to think she was dead? That brought a laugh out of Akito's tired body, 'Of course she does, I told her to her face.'

Feeling Ruri slipping down his back, Akito took a moment to re-hoist the woman into a better position; he tried not to think of how soft Ruri's arms felt against his neck as they hung lifelessly against him. "Is somebody out there?" a timid voice rang out in the stillness of the supposed night, Akito couldn't tell the time but due to the darkness assumed the colony was in its 'night' mode. The moon had no real day or night, only what was scheduled for such.

Unsure if he should chance another encounter with security by answering the voice or to hide again, Akito stood still. The voice called out again, "Hello, is someone there?" It was a female voice, how perfect Akito's mind taunted. He'd had nothing but problems with women all his life it seemed. He saw the girl's face, illuminated by a small domed light above the door at which she stood. By his estimation the girl was about sixteen, had shoulder length brown hair, she wasn't unattractive. Cute in a plain sort of way and garbed in a dirty apron and black slacks.

Ruri's moan of pain made Akito's choice for him, he had to get Ruri someplace off of the streets so he could insure her safety. Yes he was upset, livid, at her, but he wasn't going to risk her life before he knew why she abandoned him. Emerging into the illuminated area by the door, Akito responded to the call with his most 'friendly' voice. "Miss, hello." Akito was right to think the girl had taken a few steps back into the building, he would have too. "My friend got hurt when our apartment collapsed." It was a lie, but Akito was certain the building he woke up at was a derelict apartment he prayed the girl believed him.

Wary of the man, the girl pulled the door closer to her body, ready to rush in and lock it at a moments notice. "Hurt, hurt how?" she didn't like being untrusting, but with the world as it was, and with the attacks going on it wasn't uncommon for the less ethical people to try and take advantage of things.

Turning his body to allow the young woman a view of Ruri, he'd taken off the remains of the helmet and her gloves in an attempt to make her more comfortable revealing Ruri's short hair and face. The drying blood was still caked under Ruri's nose and chin. "A metal rod fell and hit her across the face, if you could let us in so I could check and make sure that's all. We'll leave right after I promise," Akito's voice pleaded as he took a few fugitive steps closer to the door.

Ayumi had to admit the girl being held looked bad, and the man seemed very trusting. 'He looks like Kyo-chan,' she thought sadly about her dead boyfriend, killed a year back during one of the Jovian attacks. Her old feelings betrayed her self-preservation as she pushed the door open further. "Sure come in, I'll get some water for her." Akito was never more grateful for such a small blessing and quickly followed the girl into the building.

X-X

She hurt all over, not sections of her body hurt, her entire body hurt. Ruri didn't want to move, think, or even breathe as anything added to the low drumming ache. 'What the hell happened this time,' she thought as she felt something moist press against her forehead. Water dribbling down the sides of her temples and meshing with her short hair. Despite her want to not accept reality, Ruri's voice croaked out of her parched throat. "What building did I fall out of, and why did you save me?"

Not expecting Ruri to speak, she hadn't moved for three days, caught in a sudden fever that should have received medical attention, Akito's hand jerked. "You didn't fall off the building, you jumped with me and the Jovian mecha," his voice devoid of emotion. Sitting by Ruri's futon in the Amatsu family's common room, Akito had held vigil over her body while she slept. Had they been important people, Akito would have moved her to a hospital. Sadly he was a nobody, and Ruri, well Akito didn't know what to make of Ruri now, so any hope for a doctor had been dashed upon reality. Reality dictating that in a time of crisis money was the real power. "You've been in and out of a fever since we got to the moon."

Ruri's eyes opened at the toneless words spoken by a man she knew was brimming with emotion. 'Akito,' Ruri's mind thundered as she took in the blank face of the man hovering over her. She had envisioned her reunion so many times she had lost count, thought of all the different ways it could have happened. Oddly this wasn't one of them. "Akito, how…where are we?" she asked in an insecure voice that was alien even to her.

Pangs of guilt and regret stung Akito's mind as he heard Ruri speak. How easy it would be to just forget the past, take her into his arms, smother her in kisses, and hope for things to get better. 'She seems so frail, like glass or porcelain when she talks like that.' But just as the memories of good came, so did the memories of the bad. He thought of the pain and hurt of thinking her dead. He had felt it was unjust for him to live and her die, yet here she was, alive and for all intensive purposes well. He didn't know how to cope, "We are in the care of the Amatsu family. Their daughter let us in after she found me carrying you away from our destroyed apartment."

Always one to catch on quickly, Ruri made a mental note of the cover story. Laying on her back, Ruri did the only thing she could, watch Akito as he moved in short jerky motions. 'I guess I should have expected this, I mean I did lie to him. Let him believe I was dead. I didn't want to…but now what do I do.' If Akito knew that she was the same girl that was also aboard the Nadesico he'd treat the young girl differently. Such a difference could spell death for her, but that was something to think about at a later time, now she had more important issues. "She doesn't love you does she, the daughter. Women seem to throw themselves at you," Ruri tried to joke, to get a smile from Akito.

"I remind her of her boyfriend," Akito admitted with a slight upturn of his lips, not a full smile but some expression. Truth was Ayumi had taken a small shine to the man who helped her father work. Saw him as an elder brother, somebody she could trust in a place where trust was scarce. Finding an unappreciative look on Ruri's face, Akito pushed himself off the ground and to his feet. "Don't worry, I'm sure its nothing. I have to go and help her father with some cleaning work. Consider it payment for room and board."

The cry for Akito to stop died on her lips as he walked through the door. What could she say in reality that would make any sense? I didn't tell you I was alive as I'm from the future? I tried to tell you but Inez wouldn't let me. 'Or how about, gee sorry I let you cry on my shoulder about me being dead, funny thing is I'm alive and just let you suffer.' Her tactical mind couldn't come to a solid conclusion about how to face Akito about her farce on the Nadesico but knew she had to. Her racing heart was proof that regardless of how Akito may feel for her right now, she loved him, and wasn't going to just let him leave her now that he knew she was alive.

"So you're awake huh?" an unfamiliar voice called from the door. Ruri was right to assume it was the young daughter of the Amatsu family. And Ruri was also right when she thought she saw malice in the young girl's eyes. The time traveler just sighed and tried to fight back the urge to cringe, it hurt like hell when she did, as the girl walked over to her. It was going to be one of those types of conversations wasn't it, the tech thought? She was right.

X-X

Four days past in that way, Ruri recuperating from her illness and unknown blowback from Boson jump, Akito helping the Amatsu family, and all the while the two old flat mates stumbled around one another. Akito wanted to talk to Ruri but didn't want to press her while her health was down, and in fact didn't know what to say to her. Ruri was just afraid, afraid that all she wanted to live for, what she was fighting and suffering for was going to abandon her. 'I can't refute him for it though, with what he knows he has every reason to hate me.'

One week since their sudden arrival on the moon, and one week prior to Akito's nonchalant call to the Nadesico, if time was the same Ruri added, the pale woman forced her body off of the floor mat and onto her feet. She was still in slight pain, but it was easily manageable now. Taking in her environment for the first time, Ruri wondered if all apartments were the same off of Earth. The dwelling was small but cozy, wooden floors adorn with a small rug or carpet, glaring white walls hosting portraits of dead family members, and a general air of desperation. "Just like our apartment had been" Ruri spoke under her breath

A voice Ruri had grown to know in her short stay in the apartment wafted through the small hallway in which she stood. "It smells so good, how did you get so good at cooking Akito-san?" Of course it was Ayumi and by the sound of the girl's words, Ruri guessed she was with Akito in the kitchen.

'If I was stuck on the moon, the only men around two sometimes three times my age, I guess I would cling to the first man my age I saw too,' Ruri mused as she shambled her way towards the voices. She heard Akito claim it was his job and dream to be a good chef someday, some things never changed it seemed. Finding the kitchen to be nothing more than a simple stove and sink, Ruri thought of the food she had been eating while she recovered. 'Has he been making that too?' And there stood Ayumi, right behind Akito and peering over his shoulder while he cut some vegetables. Ruri was happy to intrude, "Is this the work you've been doing to pay for our boarding?"

Not missing a step, Akito replied as Ayumi turned and gave Ruri a shocked and unhappy stare, "They found out I was a pilot and the other men are asking the guard base here if I'd be allowed to use one of there mecha in an emergency." The words carried the emotional weight of a broken man. Standing in this small kitchen, using food stock that would have been left to rot under better times, Akito tried not to think of how piloting was always their to ruin his dreams and hopes. Setting the knife down and turning to face Ruri, "Feeling well enough to stand today?"

Sensing the air in the room growing heavy, Ayumi excused herself, citing she was going to check on her mother. Waiting for the apartment door to close, Ruri was satisfied with a loud click followed by silence. "I'm doing a lot better now Akito." Was he going to allow her to use such a familiar term with him, or had she in her urge to survive ruined their relationship.

Rubbing between his eyes with his thumb and forefinger, Akito wasn't ready to talk to Ruri yet, but knew it was the best time to. Turning the heat under the pot of stew down to a low simmer, Akito followed by Ruri made there way in silence, drawn by an unknown cue to the dining room table. "I guess we have a lot to talk about don't we Ruri," Akito let the words remain vague, he was going to let Ruri take things at her own pace, he owed her that much.

The metal chair felt cold and uncomfortable under her weight, Ruri realized as she fell deep into it. Neither one of them could meet the other's eyes. Where to start, the beginning, no she couldn't tell Akito about her real reasons for hiding from him. That much Ruri understood. "Akito, about…me not telling you…" Ruri's strength was ebbing away with each labored breath she took in. The air itself seemed to be heavy and weighing her down.

Breaking his silence bringing the question up, Akito slammed his palms against the table. His face still and unreadable mask, "Sorry, just…all this time Ruri…all that time since we picked you and Inez up you…you just…" Shaking his head, Akito again lapsed into silence. What Akito knew about Ruri was that she never did anything without some reason or thought. So what was her reason for not telling him? Did she not care for him any longer, did she ever, or maybe she resented him getting away from Mars while she had to stay there and suffer. 'I've been selfish to think only about my feelings about this…she had to have some of her own.'

Rattled from Akito's outburst, Ruri sat rigidly and proper, a child scolded by its parent and afraid of further disappointment. "I wanted to. I wanted to tell you the moment I saw you aboard the Nadesico Akito, you have to believe me." Though the words were heartfelt, Ruri doubted they'd reach Akito's mind. Having lost so much, and seeing how he'd changed due to her supposed death; Ruri doubted anything could truly reach him on some level.

"Its easy to say you wanted to after the fact isn't it," Akito said bitterly. While his mind was aghast at what he said, he couldn't stop himself. All the feelings of abandonment, of loss, and regret came flooding back into his mind know with the knowledge that it was fake. He wanted to forgive Ruri, to give her the opportunity to tell him why she had hid herself, but it was so hard to keep his emotions at bay. "Just show up, on accident might I add, and say 'oops sorry' and I'm supposed to forgive you?"

Not what she wanted to hear, but deep down Ruri knew she it was what she was expecting. One can't lie to another for so long and expect it to blow over. Yet being yelled at by the only man she had loved for reasons she couldn't help was as torturous as it was maddening. Try as she might to think of a good reason for her actions, she couldn't. Tears started to slowly streak down her cheeks and pool on the table. "Yes…you're supposed to forgive me." Her voice hitched in her throat and for a second Ruri wondered if she'd be able to speak again. "You're supposed to forgive me because you love me!"

Throwing her hands over her mouth, Ruri couldn't believe she had used Akito's love for her as a weapon against him. Used the knowledge of him to find an escape for unanswerable questions. Akito just gazed at her hard. Ruri was sure he'd stand up and leave her, but not just leave her physically but emotionally too. He didn't, yes he got to his feat and walked over to her. Ruri cringed back, expecting a fierce blow to her face. She believed it expected, yet the only touch was a soft one, a cupped palm to her chin as Akito lowered himself to look her in the eyes, his own moist with unshed tears itself. "Shouldn't that have been why you told me?" he asked quietly, neigh above a whisper.

Throwing her arms around Akito's neck, Ruri crushed her face against his chest sobbing. Yes she hated herself for showing such weakness, yes she knew it was wrong of her to take support from the one she should have been supporting, but to be in his arms, to feel him, not just the rough texture of her suit against her skin. She could smell his aftershave it was mellow yet intoxicating. When he wrapped his arms around her, joined just above the small of her back, Ruri and Akito both could feel it. They would move past this, he loved her and she him, so they would move on. But for right now, they would hold one another as they had dreamed of ever since they separated, later on they would deal with the why's and how's of the past.

Pushing Ruri back softly, her eyes accusing and almost hurt at the act, Akito smiled at her. 'Hope she doesn't think it to forward but I vowed if I got the chance…' Akito closed his eyes and pulled Ruri into a small chaste kiss. He drank in her essence in that light contact, savored it like fine wine, as she herself was doing. From her hiding place by the door, Ayumi sniffed quietly. Even though it meant she had no place in the man's heart, Ayumi could feel the joy they were feeling and vowed she too would find a love like that.

X-X

"Somebody seems in better spirits lately," Kazuya Amatsu said over his diner plate three days after the reconciliation. Having returned late that night from getting permission for Akito to pilot after many attempts at persuasion, Kazuya was forced to eat a reheated diner while his wife and daughter slept. 'And that girl of his is sleeping too…'

Sharing a drink with the man that allowed him safe haven, Akito smiled over his can. "I guess I got some good news over the past few days." It was confusing as hell, and it still hurt knowing that he had lived with such guilt for so long for no reason, but Akito couldn't stop himself from the elation I knowing Ruri, his Ruri was alive and back in his life. They had spent nearly every moment together after the tear filled argument that ended with a fragile rejoining.

Raising his can up to Akito, who did the same, "To good news, may we all get so much of it the Jovian's choke on it." Akito mimicked the cheer and the two men drank heavily. Letting out a content belch, Kazuya patted his bulging stomach. "You keep cooking for us, I may not let you leave. I know Ayumi would like that. Though I doubt your lady friend would."

The silly grin still on his face, Akito replied, "I doubt she would too. Though I'm sure Ayumi will find somebody a bit more her style than myself." Ayumi's still be more extravagant and flashy, a trait Kyo had in spades while he was alive.

His daughter and wife were his reasons for living, so at the mention of his daughter Kazuya lulled into silence. This man, Akito, hadn't seen the tears and screams of his Ayumi at the news of Kyo's death, so maybe flashy and extravagant weren't what the young girl needed. "A man can't choose his heart Akito. It's a woman's job to chose it for him, and smack him when he doesn't accept it. Remember that."

Not fully understanding the older man's logic, Akito smiled nervously and agreed non-the-less. "I wanted to thank you again for letting Ruri and I stay here, once Ruri can find a way for us to contact our ship we'll be out of your hair." Though living alone with Ruri again had its perks, but he wouldn't abandon Yurika and the others. 'Yurika, what do I tell her…I love her to, to an extent. And Ruri said she had to put the disguise back on when she gets back so I can't even use her as an excuse.'

After the tear stricken hug and kiss had ended, Ruri was quick to business. She knew Akito's fate put him back on the Nadesico, and that meant she was bound for it too. Though with him knowing she was alive complicated things more. Nakushita was at one time a real person after a hack job to the Nergal mainframe, Ruri in her current form wasn't. Her younger self was also a hindrance. If Akito was to know that she was both the older woman and young child he would treat the younger version differently. If his change in attitude towards the young Ruri altered said girls perception, well who could tell what altering the past meant to those that were deemed non-existent, they weren't around to tell.

So Ruri had been adamant in her facts that she was going back and in disguise again, her lie to Akito stemmed from their time together on Mars. She was an escape experiment, and if found out would be terminated. So in a certain light it wasn't a lie at all. Secondly she made it clear that she had no ties to they young Hoshino aboard the Nadesico, and lastly she had to stay living with Inez. 'It's just better that way for now, don't worry though it won't be for long,' Ruri had told him. Her rational was that it was only roughly two months until the boson jump test that shipped her to the past would occur and she'd know what fate had in store for her.

Akito's internal recounting was broken when Kazuya pushed himself away from the table, the metal legs screeching against the floor. "Well I'm off to bed now, don't stay up to late now we have a long day tomorrow." Akito waved to the man as he walked out of the room to join his family in the small room where they slept, giving the strangers a room of their own.

It was going to be a long day tomorrow, and a long night, Akito thought. He looked at the hallway that lead to his and Ruri's room. 'I'm going to sleep with her tonight,' Akito realized as he got out of his own chair. They hadn't slept in the same room very much when they lived together, and handful of times when they were too tired to care. 'Maybe she's asleep already, or maybe she's waiting for me.' While they hadn't been very clear about there feelings back then, they were totally clear now, they loved each other. He had fantasized a few times about 'sleeping' with Ruri in the past, but thought it impossible then due to uncertainty, now however well the future is unclear, that's why it's the future.

Walking into the room and looking at Ruri's futon, Akito gasped as he found a pair of eyes looking at him, waiting for him. He shut the door and got into his futon, what happened afterwards neither Akito nor Ruri regretted.

X-X

'He's dead…he's dead and I was powerless to stop it,' Yurika sobbed as she clutched her pillow against her body tightly. Akito, the boy she loved ever since she met him, had died protecting them all from destruction at the hands of the Jovians. At first she didn't accept it, thought it was a lie, a problem with the projection over the comm. lines.

Erina and Inez confirmed what happened once there were aboard again. Yurika wanted to slap the self-righteous smirk off Erina's face when she saw her step foot on the bridge. She punched the woman after Erina said 'At least he was a hero in the end.' To Yurika, Akito was always a hero he wasn't just a guanine to use and wash her hands of after he was spent. 'What do I do now?' Yurika thought absently, the spark inside her gone.

"Yurika, are you crying?" a voice from a comm. channel asked her. She didn't even look up at it. She had disabled the link to her room after she had shut the door, she didn't want to even see artificial light at this point. 'Why won't these people leave me alone, all I want is one moment! Its either I need to be dumb, happy, a sexual figurehead! Why can't I be weak when I want to be?' Yurika's mind accosted itself. "Call later," was all she said.

"But if I did, it wouldn't be Christmas. Merry Christmas Yurika," Akito tried again, pained to see Yurika so hurt. Ruri had insisted they wait until after the accident that sent them to the moon had passed before contacting the ship for safety. Akito didn't understand much of the physics in it, but trusted Ruri's judgment. "Yurika look at me, please?"

Just wanting to voice to shut up and leave her to wallow in misery like she wanted, Yurika cast her red-rimmed eyes at the screen and her heart lurched in her chest and pounded in her head. She could feel every beat behind her eyes as she beheld the specter that couldn't be there, shouldn't. "Akito…dearest…is it…can…how?" Yurika fumbled as a myriad of questions filtered into her mind only to be squashed by Akito's slightly smiling face.

Laughing at Yurika's response, and her innocence, Akito just nodded to the unasked question. "Nakushita and I teleported to the moon somehow. We couldn't get in contact with you until now." Akito had to laugh at how Yurika snapped from sad to happy in a nanosecond.

Not a second after he had told her about his whereabouts, Yurika was online to the helm and setting a coarse for his destination. She had lost him once, she'd be damned if she lost him again. She wished Akito Merry Christmas just before the connection was lost and she headed back to the bridge. 'Next time I see him, I'm going to hug him, and kiss him, and I'm never going to let go of him, ever.'

Unnerved by the sudden change in their captain's temperament and the sudden change in plans, the crew of the Nadesico was just as shocked as Yurika to learn Akito was alive and they were going to reclaim him, Nergal orders be damned. Inez just smiled in her room, having gotten a call from Ruri at the same time Yurika got one from Akito. Making a new helmet for the young girl, Inez couldn't help but ask, "How was it?"

X-X

Author notes

Before anybody says 'how could you have Akito and Ruri do that! Its out of character' To you I have some orders for you.

Fall in love with somebody but never act on it physically

Have them vanish for a long time

Have them show up again and still feel the same if not more so

Keep your hormones in check while sleeping next to them

See I knew you couldn't do it so why blame them for finally consummating there relationship, I find it totally in character for them as I've matured their characters in my story. If you don't agree I'm sorry but I hope you still support my story and the characters there in.

I'm done defending myself

Ja Mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie-at-secondimpact-dot-com)