Braska's notes: This is my translation of the first entries in the ancient journal I received from Summoner Tomoris. I wish now I had never opened it…
First Journal entry
I am going to keep this journal in a safe place so someone, maybe many years from now, might find it and know the truth of the destruction of Zanarkand. Let me tell you what I know to have happened, I was there, and I know.
There was a grand convocation of all the church leaders, and Bevelle wanted Zanarkand to move several of the fayth to their main temple, so they would share their power equally. Those fools in the Bevelle temple couldn't stand Zanarkand having control of the fayth, even though they didn't have a single summoner themselves. The asking had escalated to demands by this point. Yu Yevon had just been selected to head the Zanarkand temple; he was a stiff necked old man, a brilliant summoner, but I always thought he was a little fanatic in his beliefs. Maybe that played a part in what happened, because relations went downhill quickly when Yu Yevon refused to allow any of the fayth out of the city - he vowed he would never allow Bevelle to control the fayth and stomped out of the convocation in a rage.
Bevelle started arming soon after that, and began working on some sort of super weapon. I never knew what they planned – I wasn't in the top level of the temple even then – but I heard things. We weren't caught totally unprepared when they attacked, but we couldn't face their machines and automatic weapons. We died, hundreds of us, in the first assault. We had to fall back into the city and give up a big section of the outlying houses. People were evacuated, but a lot of innocents died that day. Why! I just don't understand why. We were both part of the same church, we believed the same things, Yevon was our God too; how could he have allowed this massacre?
"What is going on?" Auron reached out and caught hold of Braska's arm, stopping him in the hallway outside the cafeteria. They had just left the meeting with Cid and were heading back towards their room. Auron had about had enough of Braska's silence, and he wanted to know what was wrong with his best friend. "I've been by your side over eighteen years and now you start keeping secrets from me?" Auron shook Braska slightly, making him look up, but quickly dropped his arm when he saw the determined expression on Braska's face. "Now! It's time you leveled with me, or don't you trust me anymore?"
Braska looked his friend in the eyes; saddened at the bewilderment he saw there, the hurt his silence had caused. He knew there was worse hurt in store, but couldn't figure out how to spare him the pain. "I have always trusted you Auron. I just don't know what to say right now. I need you to understand that I have had my faith shaken with the church and I need you to be the foundation I can stand on. I don't mean to hurt you, but you will have to trust me." And allow me to carry this burden alone, he thought to himself, knowing his friend would never understand the actions Braska might have to take to give Spira a hope at peace.
"That is a load of shupuff shit! I'm your best friend, and you can't tell me what you can tell a man you have only known three days?" Braska shook his head mutely, unable to answer the pain in Auron's voice. Auron looked at him silently, then turned and strode off towards their room, cut to the quick by Braska's refusal.
Braska stood with his head bowed for a long moment, deeply saddened, knowing that the last thing in this world he wanted to do was hurt Auron. The fact was he would not have survived many of the situations they faced together without him, and Auron needed Braska at his back as well. He couldn't count the many times they had supported each other over the years, and he trusted Auron with his life…but there was no way he could tell his friend the awful truths he had learned about the Church of Yevon from the journal Tomi had given him. He heard a small sound and turned to see Leyona standing in the side hall, having just come in from outside. He looked at her glumly and she blushed then quickly apologized for eavesdropping and turned to leave.
"Wait, you don't have to go," Braska called out to stop her, his voice pleading. "Please, talk with me? I need to let him cool off for awhile, and I'd rather not be alone with my own thoughts." She nodded and motioned him back towards the door to the platform.
"So, what was that about?" Leyona asked, not really expecting an answer as she saw the pained expression on Braska's face. They were walking slowly along the deck, and paused as they reached the point Braska had been standing when the fiend had attacked. He stopped, and stood watching a crew of workers attempting to shore up the torn and twisted light tower. Leyona turned to look at them as well. "You never said you were a Summoner, Lord Braska," she commented, turning to lean on the railing, looking out at the dark sky. The moon had set, and it would be true dawn soon enough; she wondered what the new day would bring.
"No, I didn't," Braska admitted reluctantly. "We were hoping the need for that would never arrive."
"You didn't trust us?" Leyona suggested, hoping that was no longer true.
"No, it wasn't really that, it was more…I knew it would bother you, your people I mean, my being a summoner." Braska moved restlessly, starting to walk towards the workmen, thinking to offer his help, since he was unlikely to get any sleep tonight anyway. "I had hoped that I wouldn't have to call an aeon while we were here."
"It was beautiful," Leyona whispered, thinking about the magnificent being the man beside her had called, befriended really, she thought. "What is its name?" Braska looked at her in surprise; all children in Spira knew how to identify the different aeons – they learned about them in temple school, and knew their names even if they might never actually see one. He was shaken a bit, having the difference in their lives, their whole life experiences, brought home to him with that one question.
"His name is Ifrit…"
"He was very fierce, his roar shook my heart, I think," Leyona knew she'd never seen a more magnificent sight. "Summoners have more than one aeon though? I mean, I know there are others?" she asked curiously.
"There are others, I only have two of them, Ifrit and Ixion – I had just started my journey when the calm began. There wasn't much point in continuing so Auron and I went back to Bevelle," Braska explained, "The others are Valefore, Ixion, Shiva, Bahamut, and the new one is called Anima." He paused, thinking of how to describe them, and she took the opportunity to ask another question.
"Did you learn how to fight when you were on your journey?" the young woman asked curiously, catching her hair in one hand as a rising breeze blew it across her face.
"No, Auron and I joined the crusaders when we weren't much more than kids. We were trained by them mostly; Auron always managed to find someone who was willing to train us more, every time we were posted somewhere new. It got to be a joke with the other crusaders, they'd bet on who our next teacher would be." He knew the other's had been proud of their growing skill, and had helped persuade some very skilled fighters to instruct them.
"You and Auron are so skilled –Aja says he's never seen anyone better, and he's been all over Spira." Braska brushed that compliment away, knowing that there were many people more skilled.
They were approaching the bridge to the other barge, and a few of the crew had noticed them, a look of unease coming over their faces. Braska felt a frown pulling down on his face, and made an effort to change it to a more neutral expression. It was obvious they were unsettled by his presence. They knew nothing of the abilities of a summoner, and Ifrit had frightened them deeply.
"I don't think I will bother them after all," Braska stopped, watching them for a moment, and then turned back towards the building. "I think I would just be in the way." Leyona turned to see what he'd been looking at, and realized her friends and cousins were frightened, of Braska. She narrowed her eyes at them and made a reassuring gesture, turning them back to their work, and then hurried after the retreating man.
"What is troubling you Lord Braska?" Leyona asked, turning to face him as they entered the hallway to his room once more. "You have been carrying a distress in your eyes since I met you, and it seems to have increased over the last day or so."
"Please, call me Braska," he requested, then started to answer and faltered with the words. Leyona waited patiently for him to continue. "There are so many things that have happened in the last couple weeks that I doubt that any decision I make is correct." He stopped, having to reach deep for the words in Al Bhed and failing, so he continued in common. "I have hurt my best friend, who I love like a brother; but I can't share the information that I have learned with him. Lady Reena, the fayth of Anima in Baaj, told me something terrible, and it is eating at my heart." He explained at her look of inquiry. Leyona's eyes widened; she hadn't realized a summoner could talk to a fayth, as if to another person. He continued with a haunted expression on his face. "I have since learned things that make me doubt the church and its teachings, teachings I have believed all my life. I feel betrayed by a number of things I've seen happening in Spira, things that have happened to us, and I don't know what to do about it. And also, I worry that this plan will not work; after seeing the number of ships down there, I can only imagine the size of the offensive mounted against Sin, and see how badly it failed, and yet I am going to betray the very people who sent me here, to give us a chance to try again!"
Leyona thought for a moment before she replied, taking Braska's hand. "I don't know if it will work, and if it does, I don't know if Sin will return or not. But I know without hope we have no reason to live, and that in the time before we go to the Farplane, we must always be thankful for the things we are blessed with, and the people we share our lives with…or we can never be truly happy."
Braska began to realize that the woman standing in front of him was not only outwardly beautiful, she had a warmth and inner beauty that shined within her soul, so brightly you could see it in her eyes…and that he was very likely falling in love with her. "I should thank you for your kindness and understanding, I…" But before he could say another word she pulled his head down and kissed him tenderly, her lips soft on his for a long moment before she pulled back to look at him with a slight smile. Braska looked back at her with a stunned expression, unable to respond for a moment.
A voice called from down the hallway, "Leyona! Time to shut down for the night!" Braska turned to see Cid, standing with an expression of disapproval on his face. Leyona stepped away from Braska and walked quietly to Cid, then jerked her arm angrily away from him when he grabbed at it. He turned and stalked off towards their quarters, Leyona turning to glance back at Braska before following her brother.
Auron was still awake when Braska entered their room, lying on his bed, still dressed except for his boots. Braska closed the door quietly, without turning on the overhead light, and then leaned his back against it. "We need to talk about this, Braska," Auron spoke quietly from the darkness. "I am sorry for the outburst – I realize that as a diplomat, you need to be able to divulge information when you see fit, and that sometimes I won't be told everything. It just hurts, because I know there is something eating at you, and you won't tell me." He sat up, and lit a candle he'd placed on the table beside his bed, when Braska didn't respond. Braska still stood against the door, one hand covering his eyes, a tear running down his cheek. "You've been holding something inside you since we left Baaj. It's gotten worse since then, and I want to help." Auron rose and approached his friend, wrapping his arms around him and silently holding him as he shook with tears.
Braska lay awake in his bed until nearly morning, thinking about what he'd discovered in the small book Tomi had given him. He'd worked on translating it ever since Rin had left it for him, and it hadn't been easy. The book was in bad shape, at some point in its existence it had been both burned and drowned, and many of its pages were damaged. The cover was leather, with several gouges across the face. He remembered how it had felt the first time he'd opened it, the sense of mystery…he finally fell asleep, remembering how his nightmare had begun...
- - - flash back - - -
Braska turned the pages carefully, cursing softly when the edge of a page crumbled to nothing in his hand. "This can't have been opened in hundreds of years," he mumbled, trying to peel several pages apart without destroying them.
"What is it?" Auron asked, turning a page on the Al Bhed primer he was reading, trying to increase his understanding of the language. He was still far from fluent, well behind Braska's level of understanding.
"It's a journal of some sort, and it's really old. Tomi put a note inside; he says it was ancient when he found it in a hidden niche in the wall of the fayth chamber – soon after he first arrived in Baaj. That makes it at least four or five hundred years old, and I wouldn't doubt it's older than that – it may date all the way back to the first temple on Baaj. I'm trying to find a mention of dates, but it seems to be in some sort of cipher, plus it looks like it was written by several different people and they all had awful handwriting." Braska sighed as he pulled a notepad over and started trying letter combinations, trying to translate the text. "I wonder why he thought it was so important for me to read it…"
"You'd think he would send the key to the cipher if he wanted you to read it that badly," Auron said as he came over and looked at the book over Braska's shoulder. "Wait – turn back to the last page," Auron said as Braska turned another page. "Look, see how these markings line up with markings on the front cover when you hold them together like this? There's a pattern!" Braska looked carefully at what Auron was pointing out, and carefully wrote down the letter pairs revealed.
"Too bad the pages are damaged at the bottom," Braska complained, knowing that only having part of the letter pairs would make it much harder to decipher. "I think it's a substitution cipher of some sort, but the sentence structure is wrong, it doesn't make sense." He looked at it for awhile, scribbling different translations and shaking his head.
"Is there any reason it has to be only one cipher?" Auron asked, intrigued with the problem. "Maybe it's in another language?" Braska looked at him in wonder and began writing furiously…finally dropping his pencil to stare at the paper after more than an hour of work. "It's written in the language of Zanarkand, but it's been translated phonetically into common, with those letters encoded in a progressive substitution cipher." He shook his head in admiration for whoever had thought up the code. "Somebody didn't want this read, not easily anyway." Code broken, Braska had set himself to translating the text, eager to find out its secrets.
"My brother has been explaining the plan to the council and they are basically in agreement with it - as long as the crusaders are the ones implementing the weapon." Leyona told Braska several days later, as she set her tray of lunch beside him on the table. The council had been meeting all morning, without Braska or Auron, to discuss the plan they had suggested for the use of the cannon. They were taking a long time deciding if they agreed with the plan, and Braska was eager for a decision.
She looked across the table at Auron, and noticed that their relationship seemed easier today. "There are going to be two conditions however: first, they want assurances that it will be placed near the sea, in a location where it cannot be used on any other targets. The second is that it be dismantled and destroyed after Sin is eliminated. In return we'll promise to destroy all engineering plans for its construction, witnessed by any who wish to observe." Leyona smiled as Braska and Auron's expression's brightened. "I'm sure he'll be telling you about it officially, but I wanted you to know."
"I will include these terms in my report to the council," Braska said, looking up at Auron. "You know how to get in touch with Commander Sellus?" The commander of the crusaders based in Luca was a man with an open mind, and had grown fond of them during their enlistment; he'd seen them frequently when their youthful misdeeds had brought them into his office, so he was the logical person to contact.
Auron grunted, and considered what to write, thinking that the content of his letter would be a surprise for the man. "He will probably be able to recommend a site, and would know who we will need to work with on this."
Braska nodded, and looked down at his plate, just picking at the food; Auron looked back at him, and frowned as Braska's expression turned grim again. He wondered if Braska was still torn in his heart about the confrontation they'd had; Braska held too much inside, he thought, he always had, and Auron knew he needed to prod his friend into some physical activity to break him from his brooding.
"Eat lightly, my friend," Auron advised, "I'm going to run you around the deck after lunch; you're starting to get a paunch – you wouldn't want to look like High Priest Balamus, now would you?" Braska looked at him in surprise, and turned an accusing eye on him as he caught the joke. Leyona laughed at Braska's wounded expression, and hurried to finish her food – this is something she really wanted to watch!
"We'll see about that, won't we?" Braska promised with a raised eyebrow, already planning his strategy.
They had a good sized audience by the time they stepped outside with their bo's; apparently word had gotten around, and many of the Al Bhed had found reasons to work nearby. Braska was amused by their curiosity, and thought it was better than the fear he'd met before. They began to warm up by running through a kata, but Auron surprised Braska by punching at his head, and Braska followed up with a series of punches and kicks Auron was pressed to block; they chased each other around the deck for a few minutes, then finally Auron stepped back, laughing as he accepted Braska's good natured surrender. Braska grinned slyly, and walked over to pick up the bo's. Auron looked at him as he walked back and accepted his without a word, wondering what Braska had planned.
"You ready? I've got a new move," Braska warned. He had been thinking of a new disarm, and was looking forward to Auron's surprise when he hit him with it. He took up a ready stance as Auron moved at him, then the battle was on. They moved back and forth across the deck with neither having a clear advantage, until Braska seemed to shift gears; driving Auron backwards and putting him on the defensive. Finally, Braska whirled and hit Auron's bo, flipping it out of his hands and sending it clattering across the deck. He ended with the end of his bo resting on Auron's throat in a follow through kill strike; if it had been a real fight it would have crushed his throat.
Auron bowed deeply to a victorious Braska, and grinned as he accepted the bo one of the young boys brought back on the run. "You're not getting out of here without showing that one to me!" Braska laughed, and began running through the new disarm at half speed. They worked out for a while longer, and then Braska went and sat on top of a large crate in the shade of one of the pieces of equipment set at the edge the deck, pulling his legs up to meditate while Auron put his sword on and began a sword workout, keeping his eyes open this time to concentrate on specific cuts and blocks, to the disappointment of the watching Al Bhed.
"Lord Braska?" A small voice asked solemnly. Braska opened his eyes, and looked around in surprise when he didn't see the speaker. "Lord Braska?" The voice came again, and he bent forward to look down towards the deck, spotting a small boy, not more than four or five years old looking up at him, his bright green eyes wide with awe.
"Yes, little one? How may I help you?" Braska asked gently, smiling at the child's serious expression.
"Could you call the aeon for me? I want to see it – everyone else got to see it, but momma had made me go to bed early and I missed it." He looked up at Braska, a hopeful expression on his face, eyes shining pleadingly. "My cousins say it was big, and roared, and threw fire, and I want to see it – they say I'd be afraid and cry, but I won't be afraid, I promise."
Braska looked up, to find a small group of Al Bhed children watching, waiting for his answer with avid curiosity in their eyes. Beyond, older Al Bhed turned to stare as they became aware of the little boy's request.
"What's your name little one?" Braska smiled at him encouragingly and he answered proudly that he was 'Nikko' and he was this many years old – holding up one slightly dirty hand, four fingers extended. "You really want me to call Ifrit? You won't be afraid?" He shook his head firmly, determined to see the aeon, now that the tall man seemed ready to agree. "All right, I'll see if I can talk him into coming to say 'hello' to you... and your friends," Braska continued as he saw the eyes of the other children light up. "He's a little scary when you first see him, but he won't hurt you – he's really very gentle. Just stay here until he answers me, and I'll introduce you to him," Braska promised, to the delight of the children, and the unease of the watching adults. Several hurried inside, presumably to tell others what was happening.
Braska walked onto the center of the deck and motioned Auron out of the way. Standing a moment with his eyes closed, he reached out with his hand to clasp the spirit staff he always pictured in his mind when summoning, then opened his eyes and brushed aside the wall between his world and Ifrit's. "Ifrit, come to me," he called softly. A huge red glyph suddenly glowed around Braska's feet, and a loud rumble shook the barge as a tremendous explosion of fire burst forth up through the deck. There were gasps and screams from the watching Al Bhed, and some ran for hiding as a sphere of blinding flame appeared; when it subsided, Ifrit was standing in front of Braska.
Braska stepped forward and ran his hands through the flaming fur on Ifrit's jaws, caressing the aeon until his eyes closed with pleasure. "No fighting today, my friend. I would like to introduce you to some people; they would like to touch you, if you would allow it?" Ifrit rumbled softly, and settled on his haunches, turning to look curiously at the children standing behind Braska; they huddled together uncertainly, but Nikko bravely walked up to Braska's side when he beckoned him.
Braska turned and motioned to the other children, and they slowly walked forward, not quite sure now that the monstrous aeon was in front of them. "Nikko, I would like you to meet Ifrit," Braska said, taking his hand and reaching out to set it on one of Ifrit's huge arms. Ifrit leaned down and…purred…at the little boy, to his delight. He giggled and reached out to pet Ifrit's arm, delighted when the flames of his aura tickled his hand. The other children slowly crept forward when Nikko wasn't harmed, and reached to touch Ifrit's horns or pat his arms with hesitant hands. Ifrit looked at the children calmly, then reached out a massive claw to stroke one little girl's shiny hair, making her shriek with delight. Finally he looked back at Braska and growled softly. "He's got to go now," Braska said gently, shooing the children back so he could dismiss the aeon. Their faces fell with disappointment, but they obediently moved out of the way. "Thank you, my friend. You've been a big help." With a last pat on his aeon's shoulder, Braska stepped back and dismissed him; Ifrit springing into the air to disappear in a roaring ball of flame.
"That was wonderful," Leyona said softly from behind Braska. He turned to see her sitting on the crate, and walked back to stand beside her. She reached out and touched his face gently, stroking his cheek in greeting. "I thought it might help a little if I showed them that the aeons aren't monsters," he said, turning to watch Auron working with several young Al Bhed boys armed with sword length sticks. He was teaching them a very basic block and strike pattern for the sword. "Ixion is a little frightening, and not quite as patient as Ifrit, but he wouldn't hurt a child either."
"I think it may take awhile for everyone to be easy around you, but the children will have something to talk about for the rest of their lives." She smiled at Braska and hopped down off the crate. "Cid sent me to get you both, the council wants to talk to you about the Crusaders…and Cid will probably have something to say to you when he finds out you let his only child pet an aeon." Braska looked at her in surprise, and she pointed at Nikko.
"You have made my nephew a very happy little boy." Braska lifted one eyebrow in surprise. "He's Cid's son," she explained.
The day had gone well; the Al Bhed council had agreed to the plan Braska and Auron had worked out, and they were starting to work on the formal report to send to the Maester Council. Auron had written a letter to the Crusader Commander in Luca, sounding him out to see if they would be willing to work on this project. Both letters would go directly to their recipients, bypassing Baaj.
The children had talked to anyone who would listen about their experience with the aeon, proud of themselves for their daring, and most of the Al Bhed Braska encountered were no longer looking at him in fear. He suspected some would be plotting ways to get him to summon Ifrit back, so they could touch him as well.
The man he'd healed had insisted on thanking him, profusely, as had his parents, siblings, and a young woman who held tightly to the man's arm, apparently afraid of loosing him. The man's mother had embarrassed them both when she hugged him tightly and kissed him on the cheek. Braska decided blushes were better than fear.
Still, it had been a mentally exhausting day, and Braska was again standing at his accustomed place at the railing. For once, the power on the nearest light tower was turned off to allow the crew to repair the twisted leg, and he could see the moon. He was gazing out at the sea in a semi-trance, just watching the moon shining onto the water. A light breeze was blowing, sending stray hairs to tickle his cheek. "I thought I might find you out here, Lord Braska," Leyona said softly as she joined him at the rail.
He turned to look at her, and smiled softly in surprise. She was wearing a soft dress, a light color, which one, he couldn't tell in the darkness, but it was loose, and flowing around her knees as the breeze moved it gently. "Just Braska, please," he asked, reaching out to take her hand and kissing the back of it gently, smiling again as her eyes widened.
"You still look sad Lor…Braska, even when you smile," Leyona corrected herself softly, watching the expression on his face change as he looked at her. She held her breath for a moment as he bent his head and gently touched his lips to hers, deepening the kiss and pulling her closer when she didn't protest. She sighed when he finally lifted his head, and relaxed hers against his chest, putting her arms loosely around him. She listened to his strong heartbeat and felt his breath stir her hair as he wrapped his arms around her, holding her against him. "It's going to work out, I know it is…" They remained there in the darkness for a long time talking softly about their dreams, and just holding each other.
They met many times over the next few days, stealing a moment here and there as they could. Their favorite time was when they stood and watched the ocean in the evenings. "You are my hope," he said softly early one night. He stood looking into her eyes and felt his heart swell. "My hope to sustain me while we do whatever it takes to reach an eternal calm." He took her hand and turned it over, bringing it to his lips and placing a gentle kiss on the palm.
She leaned closer, lifting her head to place her lips gently against his. They kissed softly, and looked into each other's eyes as their lips parted. "We shouldn't be doing this," she whispered to him. "It's not safe here, there are too many people out, and we might be seen."
"No, we shouldn't," Braska whispered back, reaching to put his arms around her; then pulling her closer, he nibbled on her ear teasingly.
"My brother would be furious if he caught us like this…" She pulled Braska's head back down and kissed him again, deeper; taking her time and enjoying the way his arms tightened around her. Finally she ended the kiss, his arms releasing her as she pulled back to look at him. "Somehow, its getting harder to care what my brother would think," she said with a small smile.
"Lord Braska, can we talk for a moment?" Aja asked quietly as the council left the conference room. They had been working on the wording of the report for Bevelle all morning and had just stopped for lunch. Braska looked at Aja in surprise, and followed him outside, curious to see what he wanted to discuss.
"Is there something you wish?" Braska asked politely, wondering what Aja wanted. He was one of the more widely traveled Al Bhed and had more experience with non-Al Bhed than the rest of the councilors so Braska and Auron felt more comfortable with him than with some of the other councilors.
"I can't think of any other way to ask this, without being rude, so I will just ask," Aja began, staring at Braska with a serious expression on his face. "What are your intentions towards Leyona? She is my sister-in-law, and I would not have her hurt." Braska blinked at the question. He hadn't been aware that his attentions towards Leyona had been noticed by many people, as had her growing affection towards him.
Braska thought for a long moment, trying to remember what the Al Bhed customs on marriage were, but could not remember that it had been discussed. "I care for her very much," he said finally. "I do not know the Al Bhed customs, but I mean no disrespect to you or your family. I would like to pay her formal court, and gain her hand in marriage."
Aja looked puzzled as he tried to work out that statement. It didn't have an equivalent in Al Bhed, but he finally thought he understood. "You wish to pledge your faith with her? A promise to marry?" Aja shook his head, very sorry for the young man. "Your feelings do us honor, but this will not be possible – she has been promised since birth to wed another. The death of her father prevented it, earlier this year, but Cid has sent for the young man, he should be here soon, and then they will wed." He watched Braska's face for a long moment, seeing the shock and pain settle in his eyes, then reached out to pat Braska's shoulder in an attempt at comforting him. "She has fought this marriage, but it is necessary; there are few Al Bhed left in Spira, and we can't allow her to marry outside her people."