Part 7

Voldemort's eyes swept around the graveyard in the morning light. Drops of water rolled down the gravestones. He hoped he hadn't spun the time-turner too much. With a swish of his nightgown he apparated back into his bedroom. Once there, he examined every inch, daring the bed to explode, glaring at the pillows, waiting for them to turn into rocks as a result of another cruel prank.

He had spared Potter's life, but at what cost? Was this Christmas Day? Was it going to be a good one? A tap at his window startled him. He walked over, pulled open it, and found the youth who claimed to be his nephew once again.

"Good Morning, Uncle!" he shouted. Voldemort's eyes opened in surprise. "I was wondering if you might spare me some money for my wedding." He remembered shortly after that he had not given him the fake knut yet. The plastered grin was annoying as ever.

Voldemort began to retort with a harsh insult, but instead ended up saying, "What day is it?"

"Why, it is Christmas!" the man said, starring at Voldemort as if he were crazy.

"Ah, yes, thank you," the Dark Lord replied, and with an evil grin, took out his wand and quickly flicked it. The ladder the man was standing on landed in the graveyard, shortly followed by it's occupant. The youth managed to yell a Merry Christmas before he collided with a gravestone.

Cheerful more than ever, Voldemort changed into his cloak but still kept on his bunny slippers. He strolled down the stairs as he came face-to-face with Lucius Malfoy. He was looking dreadfully bored to be there.

"Ah, Lucius," Voldemort began upon seeing him. "Might I ask you what's been happening with your family?"

Lucius looked afraid at his master's pleasure. "My family? Um, they've been well, yes." Why the sudden interest?

Voldemort read Luicius's expression. "How much do I pay you, Lucius?" he asked in his icy voice.

Lucius was now wide-eyed. "Why, my Lord, you pay me nothing."

"I suppose you would like a salary?"

Lucius was in awe. "My Lord, that would be most appreciated."

"Yes, I suppose it would be." Voldemort began to stalk away, leaving Lucius behind him on the stairs. "If you would like your salary, follow me." And with that Lucius leapt off the stairs and followed the Dark Lord like a puppy.

Voldemort's next stop was the living room. As he opened the door a familiar sight met him. Balloons were being inflated by magic, strands of colorful papers were being hung, and Death Eaters were hurrying to put up other decorations. Voldemort gave a large cough and the occupants stopped what they were doing.

Wormtail hurried over to the door and asked, "My Lord, what brings you here?"

"It would seem that I did not receive my invitation to the Annual Death Eater Christmas Party," Voldemort hissed in an icy tone.

"Ah, yes, er, um, perhaps it, ah, no, yes," Wormtail muttered, "Oh, well, it, um, maybe got lost in the post?" Voldemort raised his eyebrows. "Er, maybe not," Wormtail muttered before beckoning over a Death Eater.

"What is your name?" he asked the Death Eater.

"My name," the Death Eater said stiffly, "Is Bubblegumos."

Wormtail turned back towards Voldemort with a sweet smile before doing a double-take. "Bubblegumos?" he questioned.

"Bubblegumos."

"Bubblegumos?" asked Voldemort.

"Bubblegumos."

"Bubblegumos?" repeated Lucius from the hallway.

"Bubblegumos."

"Bubblegumos?" the Death Eaters from behind called out in unison.

"Bubblegumos."

Wormtail kept his eyes on the Death Eater as he said, "Well, ah, Bubblegumos, may I see your invitation?"

"Uh, alright, but I, um," Bubblegumos muttered as he took out a small envelope that was covered in red lace and purple hearts. He handed the envelope to Wormtail, who extended it to Voldemort.

"Here is your invitation, my Lord," Wormtail said with a grin.

"But without that I can't get into the Annual Death Eater Christmas Party!" Bubblegumos cried out.

Wormtail did not take his eyes off of Voldemort as he said, "Pity." He flicked his wand and Bubblegumos hurtled into the opposite wall as though a large, invisible elephant had tripped into him. Wormtail gestured towards the envelope.

"Oh, I don't want an invitation," Voldemort replied. Wormtail looked pale.

"But my Lord," Wormtail said, "You sounded as though you wanted one."

"No," Voldemort answered, shaking his head, "I merely wanted to comment that your postal service stinks." And with that he turned away. Wormtail looked at the other Death Eaters and pointed a finger at his head, twirling it around. This usually means that someone is crazy, insane, or merely has a bad hair day.

"Oh, and by the way, you're fired," Voldemort added, his back still towards the room.

"But you can't fire me, for I am a Death Eater for life!" Wormtail cried out. Voldemort froze and turned around.

His mouth twitched before saying, "Then I suppose you are suggesting I kill you?" Wormtail burst into sobs at this and went down on his knees. Several Death Eaters laughed. Voldemort withdrew his wand and flicked it casually. Wormtail smashed through the stone wall, over the gardens, over the graveyard, and into the forest.

"April Fools," Voldemort laughed.

"It's Christmas," called out one of the Death Eaters. Voldemort ignored him.

"If you all do not want to die, follow me," he said as he began to walk to the doorway. The small crowd of Death Eaters walked down the dirt path towards Little Hangleton.

"Come," Voldemort called out to the group, "Let us give the muggles some Christmas greetings!" He pulled out his wand and aimed it at the nearest house. Hoots and laughter echoed through the town as the house burst into flames. Ten minutes later, the village of Little Hangleton was eight houses smaller. An army of baboons was rampaging through the alleys. People were crying out for their loved ones. A large ship had crashed into it, even though the town was in the middle of no where. Voldemort and his gang cracked up and passed out the firewhiskey. A rousing chorus of Jingle Bells: Death Eater style was heard soon after.

"Ah, what a Christmas," Voldemort laughed, his bunny slippers wiggling their noses.

Lucius crawled his way over to Voldemort and asked "My Lord, did you not say that I would get a salary?"

"I did," Voldemort replied. And with that, he took out a Barbie doll and smacked it across Lucius's head. The pair was whisked away as the portkey did it's thing.

Back at Little Hangleton, Albus Dumbledore stood in the middle of the street. He surveyed the sight of muggles screaming for their lives as they were chased by giant Christmas Trees of Doom. With a wave of his wand, the town was restored to it's earlier form, so that the time-traveling Voldemort would see everything normal.

Seconds later, they were in Malfoy Manor. Lucius was whining about his eye as they walked into the dining room to find Narcissa and Draco, both looking shocked. Draco was dressed in his cap and crutches, obviously making fun of someone or something.

"Draco, would you come over here?" Voldemort called to him. Draco scooted over to where he was standing. The Dark Lord bent down and whispered in his ear. Draco's eyes grew wider with every word.

When they were done, Draco stood back and said, "No way and I doing that." Voldemort looked furious.

Lucius threw his son a galleon, not wanting to be digging his son's grave in this cold weather. Draco examined the galleon, and after finding it to be satisfactory, did what the Dark Lord asked.

"God bless us, everyone," he announced through clenched teeth.

Lucius sighed. Narcissa cried. Voldemort gave an evil laugh. His bunny slippers wiggled their noses.