The Randomness of Yamishipping
Yugi and Mai do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, but we do own the nice box of brownies that you can buy on a two for £3.50 offer. Yum!
Chapter One: Brownie Obsession (written by Mai)
Brownies.
Everyone has their own picture of what a brownie is, or should be like. Some think they are sweet little girls who come to your door politely selling you tasty cookies. Others think they're annoying little brats who have nothing better to do then bang on your doors and force you to buy their stale 'treats' or else they'll scream on your doorstep and have a nice big tantrum. May I suggest that if you wish for this to happen, make sure it's not on a cold winters morning. You see it's pretty cold during that time of day and scientists have not yet discovered the average time the brownie takes untill its bawling is finished.
Well there's something big that the world is going through now, CHANGE. You've heard all the adverts on the radio, on your television, or you can even find it in the local newspaper. Yes, it's true. If you're stuck round Granny's for the afternoon, pick up the paper, and you might find something there. Nowadays brownies rarely ever sell you cookies, instead they gather on one night of the week to engage in some activities before whining to their friends at school the next day about how boring brownies is.
However, some things have stayed the same...
Somewhere in the world there is a brownie leader who likes to keep to the traditions of brownies. (Well, she keeps some and likes to change the others a bit) She leads a group of brownies who have to wear the old brownie uniform and sell brownies instead of cookies. (Before you think anything, they don't sell human brownies, they sell the nice choccie ones) This leader is also a mother when she's not drepriving these innocent children. She has a son who goes by the name of Yami, and has forced him to become a brownie at the age of 17. So instead of spending his weekends going out into town with his leather gear, he has to walk up and down the streets in a brownie's uniform armed with a large box. You can imagine that he's a popular guy at school eh?
A woman sighed and put her hands on her hips as she stared down at three quivering brownies, "What's wrong?"
"W-We don't want to sell down THAT road..." One brownie said.
"Yeah, the people who live down there are scary!" Another added.
The woman rolled her eyes, "Alright, you can take the upper half of group 2's road."
The trio let out a cheer and quickly hurried away as the woman glanced over her shoulder before screaching in a high pitched voice.
"YAMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!"
A faint grumble was heard in the distance as the said teen appeared from round a corner, "What is it Mom?"
The woman squealed and clasped her hands together, "You look so cute!"
"More like stupid..."
"WHAT DID YOU SAY!"
Yami laughed nervously and began to edge away from his mother, "Nothing! I was just wondering... Do I HAVE to wear a girl's uniform!"
"Yes!" She replied, "You look so adorable in it!"
The teen rolled his eyes as his mother continued ranting in her usual manner, "Anyway, what did you want me for?"
The woman frowned, now suddenly acting rather serious, "There's a particular road nearby that none of the girls want to go near..."
"Ah, pervert alley?"
"No, I already sent a group there. Besides, they're not perverts, they're just friendly."
"Yeah... a little too friendly if you ask me..." Yami mumbled. He winced as unpleasant memories came back to him from his trip down 'pervert alley'.
"The road used to be abandoned but for some reason an odd pair of men decided to build a house there..." She added. "I sent a group there once but when they returned they looked petrified!"
Yami nodded slowly and folded his arms, "So it appears that we have a more deadly road than 'pervert alley'... Just great..." He paused, "Did you say there's only one house there?"
His mother nodded in reply, "Yup. Just the one."
"But how could they be scared of just one house!"
"I don't know..." The woman added, "Maybe it's haunted!"
Yami sighed as she began to make ghost noises, "Yeah, 'haunted'." He picked up a nearby box, "Well, I'm off. I'll prove to you that there's nothing to be afraid of! Besides, the girls tend to exagerate so that I have to do all the work!"
The teen stormed off in the true teenager style, he went to slam the door shut behind him but caught it on his heel. He winced and kicked a wall beside him before stomping his now injured foot back down on the floor, "Stupid mother makes me a damn brownie then forces me to visit some bunch of perverts just because those kids have no guts. Well I say screw it all dammit!"
"Did you say something honey?" His mother asked, poking her head around the door.
"Yes!" Yami snapped, raising a fist into the air, "SCREW IT ALL!"
"Yami! You know you shouldn't say rude things like that!"
"Sorry Mom..." Yami grumbled, slowly making his way out of the brownie hut.
The brownie business was as successful as ever, with boxes upon boxes being sold in minutes. A group of brownies giggled as they watched Yami walk past, waving at him, "Hey Yami!" One girl called, "Where you going?"
The teen shuffled up to the youth with little enthusiasm, narrowing his eyes, "I'm having to deprive myself yet again by walking up this damn street in a brownie girl's uniform to sell some brownies to some weirdos in this 'mysterious' house of theirs."
"Oh..." The girl mumbled, "Don't you mean that mysterious house where those weirdos live?"
Yami sighed and rolled his eyes, "Well deja vu! I could've sworn that was what I'd just said!" He laughed falsly, making the group of brownies sweatdrop, "Isn't it funny how things like that happen!" He continued to laugh before patting the youth on the head, giving her a moody glare, "Yes... I'm off to go sell some brownies to a bunch of mysterious perverts, and the chances of me returning are exceedingly slim. I bid you all farewell, and hope that my mother doesn't go further back in the time warp with you guys."
There followed a short silence as the girls all just stared at him blankly, "So, you're going to run away with the friendly weirdos?"
"Huh...!" Yami raised an eyebrow, folding his arms.
The brownie frowned up at him, "But why Yami? Don't you like us!"
"No! That's not it!"
"Then what?"
Yami sighed and knelt down to the girls' level, "Well, the things that the weirdos do are... not really for kids like you to know, and you should certainly avoid getting involved with weirdos."
"Does that include you, Yami?"
"No! I'm not a weirdo!" The teen held a hand to his forehead, "Weirdos do nasty, sick, dirty things to young people."
The girl nodded slowly, "So... you're running away from your home, but you're pretending to sell brownies to the weirdos to make it look like you're not going to live with them?"
"No!" Yami replied abruptly, "I-"
"You said that weirdos do nasty things to young people." The girl continued, "The young people would be us, right?"
"Yeah... and?" The teen mumbled.
"Well, that must mean you're not a young person. So the weirdos won't do anything nasty to you!"
"That's not how it-"
"So if you're running away to live with the weirdos, you must like the things that they do to older people like you!"
"WHAT!" Yami exclaimed, "Hell no! They do even nastier things to older people! Especially to people my age!"
The girl pouted and put her hands on her hips, "Yeah yeah! You like the weirdos really!" She turned round to her friends, "Doesn't he?"
"Yeah!" The others chorused.
Yami clenched his fist, "Weirdos are not nice people! Ask the group that went down perv- I mean, the alley!"
"Why would we do that Mr.Weirdo lover?" The girl asked.
The teen gritted his teeth, "Haven't you been down that place! It's horrible!"
The brownie paused, holding a finger to her bottom lip in thought, "Yeah, well maybe the people down the alley find a guy in a skirt disturbing...?"
Yami laughed nervously, "No no... They've given me proof that they like a guy in a skirt... well, they said they liked me in a skirt."
"They must have bad fashion taste." The girl answered. She watched as Yami turned round and began to walk away, "Hey! Don't leave Mr.Weirdo lover!"
"So long girlies!" Yami called.
"HEY! YAMIIIIIIIIIIIIII!"
The teen smirked and kept walking, "Sorry, but I have an appointment with my doom and I don't think it can wait."
"OK! GOOD LUCK!"
Yami winced as he turned and saw the brownies scurry away, "Luck...! I'm going to need a lot more than that kids..."
Every step down the road made the teen feel like he was getting sucked deeper and deeper into hell. He clutched the brownie box tightly in his arms, hoping that someone, anyone, would come and save him from his torture.
"Why me, why me!" He kept asking himself, earning odd looks from passers by, his voice went down to a whisper before he slammed the box down, "WHY ME DAMMIT!" He pouted and stared up at the sky, "Man, you really have something against me today, don't you? Though I guess it can't be helped..."
Yami sighed and picked up his box, peering over his shoulder at an old granny in her front garden, her eyes were as wide as plates as she stared at him in shock. He laughed nervously, "Er... I'm sorry about that..."
The woman shook her head, "N-No... don't hurt me! I-I haven't done anything
wrong!"
The teen raised an eyebrow, heading towards her, "Hey, I'm not trying to-"
"GET AWAY FROM ME YOU PHSYCOPA-"
"Brownies anyone?"
Yami rolled his eyes as the group of girls re-appeared, "Hey, nice going Yami. You know your mummy told you not to scare people with your whining!"
One girl smiled up at the elderly woman, "I'm sorry, he tends to go a bit wacko, here, have a brownie." The woman avoided eye contact with Yami as she took a brownie, walking back into her home.
"Stupid Yami-kins!" The brownie teased.
Yami folded his arms, "Whatever. I wasn't scaring her!"
"But you were whining."
"So! I'm rather emotional at times!" The teen replied.
The girls rolled her eyes, "Well, have fun with the weirdos Mr. Weirdo lover!"
Yami clenched a fist as the girls hurried away to the brownie hut, anger bubbling up inside of him at an alarming rate, "Damn... I... I..." He finally went over the edge. "I DO NOT LOVE WEIRDOS!"
After a while Yami's nerves began to die down, and now not only was he on the wild outskirts of his neighbourhood, but he was also closer to what he assumed to be his doom. The teen frowned as he came to a group of trees that were curved round, various sized branches entwining each other, making the pathway shady. Yami cursed his mother for her 'fashion sense' as he attempted to climb a stile in skirt. Fortunatly there was no one nearby, so he quickly flung himself up onto the stile and over the fence.
"And so the torture begins..." Yami spoke aloud, clutching the box in his arms tightly as he stared up at the trees. At a glance they looked burnt, but once he looked properly, Yami saw that these trees were nothing like the ones that grew in the middle of the neighbourhood. He bit his lower lip as he stared ahead of him, the path stretched out quite a large distance and he could see no light at the end. Now, he thought, was the appropriate time to panic.
Yami wasn't the most brave of people, and he hadn't encountered this sort of thing during his brownie rounds. Though he hated to admit it, the teen felt a little uncomfortable with all this. No. He was petrified.
"Ok Yami, calm down. All you have to do is walk through this scary path to meet some perverts. It's as- well... IT'S DAMN SCARY!" The teen waved his arms about madly, pausing suddenly. He turned on his heel to face the path ahead of him, narrowing his eyes.
"Right... all I've got to do is concentrate, then make a break for it." He continued to stare before sprinting down the path, making whimpering noises as he went.
It seemed that the deeper into this crazy woods he went, the more creepy it got. He sighed and began to slow down, he leant against a tree for support as he caught his breath back.
"Dammit... this... is not... my da- AH"
Yami stared wide eyed at the tree as an arrow shot into it from out of nowhere.
"O-Ok, who's out there!" He paused, raising the box in his arms, "I-I have brownies, and I'm not afraid to use them!"
He lept back as two more arrows peirced into the tree trunk, a loud creaking noise could soon be heard. Yami frowned as he felt something touch his foot, he stared down, letting out a yelp. The tree's root began to extend, reaching out for him.
"DAMMIT!"
Yami picked up the pace as he ran off again, long branches firing into the ground just inches away from his heels. "Damn damn damn damn damn!" He cursed, letting out a desperate cry as an arrow flew past his head.
"THIS IS SOOOOOOOOOO NOT FAIR!"
The teen sped through the pathway like a video set on fast forward, only much faster. But when you're wearing girl's clothes and close to your demise, can you really blame him?
Yami let out a whine as his legs gave way, he stared up at the sky, only to find that the trees were gone. He took a look behind him, his eyes widening suddenly. The arrows were still flying towards him, but they kept hitting some sort of force feild.
The teen wearily lifted himself up onto his feet, still holding his beloved brownies. "Ok, I've had arrows flying at me, and now something is stopping them from going any further past the woods..." He sighed, "This is freaky, but because I'm not dead yet, I'm willing to let that thought pass."
Running a hand through his hair, Yami turned to look at the house standing before him. He gulped and peered over his shoulder at the woods, "I could go back... but with the risk of getting killed, that may not be such a good idea." He paused, his attention now back on the house, "However, something tells me these guys don't like visitors..."
Yami frowned and clenched his fist, "Nevertheless, it is my duty to sell brownies and prove my mother wrong! Yes... I'll show her that peverts exist!"
He narrowed his eyes as he examined the house, it reminded him of the trees because it looked like this place had been caught in some serious fire.
"Maybe it was..." The teen spoke aloud, walking up to the tall jet black door, he gripped the door knocker. The silver felt cold, as if it had been frozen. Before Yami could tear his hand away from the door knocker he heard a manic laugh from on the other side of the door.
"Can I help you?"
The teen remained silent, his eyes wide wth fear.
"Well! I know you're there! You're holding the door knocker, aren't you?"
Yami yelped and quickly released his grip. Staring at the door.
"Moron."
"HEY! WHO ARE YOU CALLING MORON!"
"Er, that would be you."
"Oh yeah..." Yami mumbled, "But anyway, I'm just here for a job."
"You are! That's great, it would help if we had a little maid round here!"
The teen flushed and folded his arms, "Look here mister! I nearly got killed by your front garden!"
"Oh, the forest? That's our little game we set up, only half wits like you coiuld possibly get through."
"HALF WITS!"
Yami screamed as the door suddenly opened, a tall man with even taller blonde hair stood before him, "Yes. YOU." He stared blankly at the teen, who pointed his index finger at him.
"Y-You're..."
"Yes?"
"You're... i-its you're..."
"WHAT IS IT!"
Yami bit his lower lip, "YOU'RE HAIR IS DAMN FREAKY! WHAT ARE YOU? A PINEAPPLE!"
The man sighed, "No. It's Malik to you."
"Malik? I've never heard of a fruit like that."
"That's my name!"
"Oh."
Malik rolled his eyes, leaning against the doorframe, "Well, welcome to our home I guess. But first, who the heck are you!"
"Me? I'm Yami. I have a cruel mother who forces me to wear girls clothing while selling brownies. So if you're not gonna' buy any, at least turn your little 'game' off while I head back home."
The man raised an eyebrow in interest, "I see."
Yami frowned up at the other, "What do you mean?"
"You're the first person to make it up here, you know that?"
"That fails to surprise me." The teen replied. He yelped as a hand gripped his shoulder.
"Well brownie boy. Why don't you come in and we'll arrange some sort of
payment?"
Yami's eyes widened, "I-I can't we do that here!"
Malik let out a laugh, ruffling the youth's hair, "I like you."
"Malik. Do you have to scare our first visitor away just as they arrive! It's rather rude."
Yami peered round the man to see a figure leaning against the stair banister. They had long white hair that stuck up in different places. The teen nodded, "Yeah man, listen to your wife!"
The white haired figure narrowed their eyes, stepping towards the pair, "I beg your pardon!"
Yami gulped and stared up at the new figure, the pair both wore causual clothing, but this person had a light purple dressing gown over theirs. "I-I'm sorry! I never noticed you were a guy! Honest!"
The white haired figure smirked, "That's quite alright. But I agree with Malik, why don't you come stay for a while? I assume our game must've had you in a bit of shock."
"Yeah..." The teen laughed nervously, "Just a bit..."
"I apologize for that. Malik and I grew bored of the surroundings, it looks far too pleasant if you ask me. So, we changed it."
Yami's eyes widened, "You changed it? How!"
"Never mind that." The figure replied, "My name's Bakura."
The teen nodded slowly, turning on his heel, "Thank you for the introductions, Malik and Bakura. But I REALLY must be heading home now."
Bakura quickly grabbed the back of the youth's shirt, pulling him close, "I said you can stay so you will! Is there a problem with that!" He smiled slyly and leant close to Yami's ear, "It would be our pleasure to have you round for a while..."
"I... I guess I don't have much of a choice." Yami replied.
"Great!" Bakura said, throwing the youth into the hallway carelessly. Malik slammed the door shut behind the pair as the other outstretched his arms, "Welcome to our home Yami-kins!"
Yami let out a groan as he began to regain some of his sense after his sudden flight. "Meh... you too... I think..."
Bakura raised an eyebrow and grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him up on his feet, "Tea?"
"Eeeeh?"
"TEA DAMMIT!" The other snapped, smiling soon afterwards, "Ahem, tea. Would you like some?"
Yami slowly managed a nod, letting himself fall comically to the floor again as Bakura released him. Bakura stared wide eyed at the youth and grabbed Malik's arm hastily, "Malik, I think we need to turn our little game down a few notches."
The blonde rolled his eyes, and scooped the youth up under his arm, "Alright, alright! I'll do it later..."
The white haired boy smirked and reached out to give his partner the legendary 'hug of doom'. "But first!" Malik added, "You go make the tea. The last thing I need is you throwing a hissy fit."
"I don't throw hissy fits!" Bakura snapped, putting his hands on his hips.
"Sure you don't..." Malik mumbled, shoving the other towards the kitchen, "Go on little one! You don't need me to direct you round our house!"
"I'm going, so quit pushing me baka!" The white haired male growled.
"BAKA!" The blonde exclaimed.
Bakura gasped as the other tossed the youth aside, "Malik! Do you mind not throwing our guest around!" He grabbed hold of Yami and threw him back to the blonde.
"Look who's throwing now!" Malik replied, adjusting the youth so that he layed over his shoulder.
"How dare you accuse me of mistreating our guest!" Bakura snapped. He started struggling as the other gripped his shoulder, "Let me go! I'm perfectly capable of walking!"
The blonde sighed and scooped his partner under his arm, "Whatever. Just get three teas, and DON'T put sugar in mine. You know how much I hate that stuff!"
Bakura yelped as he was soon sprawled out across the cold tiling of their kitchen, he climbed to his feet and slammed the kettle on the side of the sink as he began to fill it up.
Meanwhile Malik slumped himself down on a plush sofa, letting the youth drop down beside him with a muffled groan.
"Meh... do you guys always fight like that? Or did I come at a bad time?" Yami asked, raising his eye level to meet the other's lavender gaze.
"Hmm? Oh, me and 'Kura? Well, I always thought he was more of the girl of the relationship."
"So did I..." The youth laughed nervously, "Until I realised he was a guy..."
Dark chocolate brown orbs narrowed as the white haired male finished boiling the water, abruptly laying out three mugs before him. "Stupid baka of a blonde..."
"You know what?" Malik asked the youth, "If I didn't know better I'd say arguing with me has become a hobby to 'Kura."
"Oh, well... I'm sorry to hear that." Yami mumbled. He coughed as the blonde slapped him on the back.
"Ah, don't be. It's common for us to act like this. I guess you could say it's our way of showing our affection to one another."
The youth raised an eybrow at the other, "You guys obviously don't know the definition of normal."
Malik paused, stroking Yami's cheek with his thumb, "Do you think it's wrong to show love like that? If you have any other ways, then feel free to suggest them. Or even better..." Malik leant his face in, "Give me a demonstration."
Yami gulped and leant back, a nervous smile tweaking the corners of his mouth, "Heh, no no, your method is fine! I'm sure you two have a lovely time together!"
"We do." The other laughed under his breath. Just as the other was about to speak he held out his hand, leaning back on the furniture to stare out into the hallway, "'Kura, did I just hear the sugar cube jar being opened?"
Bakura scowled as he twisted the jar open slowly, "No." He peered round the doorframe before placing the lid down on the counter silently.
"Fine then." The blonde grumbled, folding his arms. "Right Yami," He said, turning to the youth, "What were we talking about? Oh yes, i-"
"Do you want sugar in your tea, Yami?" The white haired male asked, smirking at the glaring blonde.
"Er, yeah. Please." Yami replied, his eyes darting from one figure to the other.
"I don't want to see one of those damn things in my mug 'Kura!" Malik said.
"Sure." Bakura finished, returning to the kitchen, he dropped a few cubes into Yami's tea before turning to Malik's. "If you don't want to see one..." He raised the jar above the mug, "You can see them all! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!"
"W-What... was that!" Yami stuttered.
Malik pulled the other onto his lap, "Er, you'll get used to this side of 'Kura..."
"When!"
"Erm, eventually."
"Oh, this is just GREAT." Yami snapped. He quickly got off Malik's lap, much to the blonde's dismay, and sat himself away from the other with as much force possible. "I'm trapped in a house with a pair of perverts!"
"Excuse me!" Malik yelled, "I think Mr.Brownie boy is getting a bit uptight of himself today!"
"WHAT!"
"You heard me brownie boy!"
Bakura rolled his eyes, smirking at the blonde's tea, which had a large mound of sugar in it. "Malik, try not to murder our guest before dinner!"
"DINNER!" Yami screeched, "I'm not eating with phsycopaths!"
Malik grabbed hold of the youth's shoulder and yanked him closer, "Look, if you don't mind Bakura and I prefer the term mentally challenged."
"Do you think that makes a damn difference!" The teen replied.
"It did when we told the others about it."
Yami shook his head in disbelief, "Others? What others!"
"I think Malik means the others who have come here before you?" Bakura jeered, earning a death glare from the teen.
"I've had enough!" Yami said, sitting up suddenly. "I've leaving this place!"
He frowned as he went to pick up his bloved brownie box, only to have Malik snatch it away.
"Uh uh! You're not leaving until we're finished."
"Finished with what...?" The teen asked. He turned to look over his shoulder as Bakura entered the room, setting down three mugs on the nearby coffee table. Yami seemed relieved as he bent to pick up the mug, all the while wondering whether this cup of tea would be his ticket to sanity. After a second thought the teen concluded that the only ticket to sanity was the front door...
"Our business." Malik replied.
"AHHHHHHH!" Yami screamed as he lifted up his mug, "W-Why is there a boy who looks like me engraved in the coffee table!"
"Oh, him." Bakura mumbled, turning away to cough nervously, "That's a long story you're better off not knowing..."
"W-Why...!"
The white haired male paused, noticing the fear in the other's eyes, "Well, it's so long that I can't be bothered to talk about it."
Yami sighed with relief and sipped at his tea. "Can't you cut it short?"
Bakura frowned in thought, narrowing his eyebrows, "Well, the basic plot of it all is that we gave him too much sugar and he actually managed to overpower us."
"Really!" Yami asked, "A pair like you, getting overpowered by HIM!"
Malik glared at the youth, deciding that now would be a nice time for him and Bakura to play with their new toy... He let a hand glide across the teen's inner thigh, smirking as he did so. "I think you've done enough talking little uke..."
"U-Uke...!" Yami stuttered, trying to pull his leg away.
"Uke." Bakura repeated, "As one would state in the manner of a dictionary. To be the lowest part of the sexual relationship. Or, the one who gets-"
"Stop!" Malik hissed, grinning afterwards. "Why don't we demonstrate the meaning of 'uke' to him?"
The other smiled to himself, "That's not a bad idea... Ok, Ukey-boy! Time for your demonstration!"
(A.N: Ukey-boy is the nickname for my sister, who is 'apparently' Yami. Lol, it annoys her so much. But I'll get annoyed if one of you wonderful peeps takes it!)
Yami whimpered as the pair drew closer, "N-No! Don't hurt me!"
"Hurt you!" Malik said, leaning further in, "Now why would we want to do that?"
"Erm... I-I..." The teen started, "Because you're gay sadistic phsycopa- I mean, mentally challenged people!"
Both Bakura and Malik had their mouths wide open, a deadly silence following before they stuck their thumbs up, "Right answer!"
"NO!" Yami sceamed, "I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!"
"Pull yourself together!" Malik replied, "You're- um... how old are you?"
"17."
"Oh right, can I start my lines again?"
"If you have to..." The teen mumbled.
"Pull yourself together! You're 17 for Ra's sake!" The blonde smiled to himself afterwards, "There. How was that for a dramatic scene?"
Bakura perched on the arm of the sofa, raising his chin in thought, "Overall it was a good attempt, Yami, your body language was excellent. I just loved the way you put on a fearful look when Malik got closer!" He paused, turning to Malik, "As for you, you continue to portray the image of a perverted madman perfectly! However, I suggest you practise your lines more befo-"
"Hold it!"
The pair turned to Yami, who outstrectched his arms, "Wait a second, are you saying you rehearsed this!"
Bakura sighed heavily, folding his arms, "I guess you are far too young to understand humor."
"I know what humor is!" Yami snapped with a pout.
"He'll be lucky if he can even spell it..." Malik whispered to his white haired partner.
"I CAN SPELL!" The teen yelled.
"Oh really?"
"Yes, really!"
"Ok, spell uke." Bakura said.
Yami nodded, folding his arms abruptly, "Fine! Erm... y... o... u... k...?"
There came a sudden uproar of laughter from the blonde, "I TOLD YOU HE COULDN'T SPELL! HAHAHAHAHAAA!"
Bakura rolled his eyes, smacking the other around the back of the head swiftly, "Malik, that's just plain rude. As for your laughter, that's just disturbing." Brown orbs raised as the male noticed Yami's face pale rapidly, the teen shook his head before clawing at the other arm of the sofa as Malik held a tight grip on one of his ankles.
"I'm gonna' die, I'm gonna' die!"
Malik stopped laughing and began to run his fingers up his captive's leg, "Awww, what's wrong? Our fun's just getting started!"
"GO PLAY WITH YOUR DAMN RABBIT BOY THEN!"
The blonde peered over his shoulder at Bakura before beginning to laugh again, "BWAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!"
"What's so funny!" Bakura snapped, watching the other point his index finger at him.
"You're right brownie boy! He DOES look like a rabbit!"
"WHAT!"
"Here, look!" Malik sat up, pulling Yami onto his lap while reaching for two parts of Bakura's hair, "See! These look like rabbit ears!"
The white haired male stared up, "I guess they do."
"Now I have a brownie boy and a bunny boy!" Malik mused. You could easily imagine the lightbulb appearing above the blonde's head as he grinned madly, "I know! Starting from today, I'm going to make a collection!"
"Collection of what?" Yami questioned, who was still confused by all this.
Malik smirked down at the youth, "Why, I'm going to make a collection of little pets!" He ran a finger down the side of the teen's face, "But don't worry, I won't leave you out on the fun..." He glanced at Bakura before laughing under his breath, "Bunny, you really should stop glaring like that. I'm might just have the urge to take you in a minute."
"Where?" Yami asked, attracting the blonde's attention. "Where are you gonna' take him?"
Malik's eyes held a hidden glint as he continued to stroke his little pet, "Well Yami..." He said, staring up at Bakura, "You can take him wherever you like. The kitchen, bathroom, even your garden shed, if you have one that is."
"But why the heck would you take someone there!" The teen replied, "It doesn't sound very exciting."
The blonde leant into the youth's face, "Oh, once things get started you find things get rather exciting." He laughed cruely as he ran a hand through Yami's hair, "Very exciting indeed..."
The teen cried mentally in his head as the other stroked him, his eyes widening as Bakura perched on Malik's knee while smirking down at him. "Maybe this seems inappropriate to ask right now, but would your last name happen to be Muto?"
"Have you been stalking me!" Yami snapped.
Bakura laughed under his breath and shook his head, "No, no. Stalking isn't our kind of thing."
"Then how did you-"
The other put a finger to the teen's lips, winking at him afterwards. "Its a secret."
"I hate secrets." Yami grumbled while edging away as Malik brought his face in closer. "Yes. Some find it hard to keep secrets, however Bakura and I don't mind if you want to boast to your friends about all this when you go home."
"WHAT!"
"I think someone's gone death." Bakura jeered.
"HEY!" Yami pouted as he pushed the blonde away, "Why the heck would I boast about this!"
Malik rolled his eyes and pushed the teen down roughly, swiftly pressing his lips down on the other's. He leant back with a smirk to stare at Yami's bewildered face. "Aww, what's the matter pet?" He teased, "You never been kissed before?"
Bakura narrowed his eyes at the blonde before shoving him aside to take over what he had started. "I think Malik's been hogging you for too long, don't you?" He brushed his lips against the teen's, "You'd prefer it if I took over now, wouldn't you?"
Yami bit his lower lip as the other straddled him, "Not really..."
"What did you say...!"
"I- um... yes!" The teen stammered, wincing as he felt the blonde toucing further and further up his legs, "Yes. I would like- er..."
"Well, now it's settled! Malik, you take the lower half while I deal with the upper."
The blonde smirked up at the other with a glint in his eye, "Yeah. On the lower part, just as you always like me 'Kura."
Bakura's face flushed a he turned away from the other abruptly, his eyes locking with Yami's. "By the way, I forgot to tell you... Malik bites."
"WHAT! NO! JUST LET ME GO ALREADY!"
"Too late for that Yami-kin..."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Ding dong!
"Damn!" Bakura cursed, clenching a fist. "Malik, could you go get the door?"
"Sure." The blonde said, rising to his feet.
The other turned to Yami, who was now smiling with relief, "Don't worry Yami." He spoke silently, running a finger down the teen's cheek. "We can have our fu-"
"Hi! This is a nice suprise!"
Bakura frowned and climbed off the youth, making his way out into the hallway. "Malik, who are you- Hey!" A smile lit up his face as he waved at their visitor.
Yami peered round the door of the living room, his eyes widening suddenly.
"MOM!"
"Oh, hey sweetie!" The woman replied, raising an eyebrow afterwards, "Why are you hiding behind the door?"
"Never mind him." Bakura interupted, "We want to know why a wonderful lady such as yourself has decided to come to a groggy place like this on such a lovely day! You should be out on a mega shopping spree to treat yourself!"
"Mom. What's going on!" Yami asked, now stepping out from behind his shelter.
Mrs.Muto smiled at her son warmly before putting her hand inside the basket she was carrying, "Well somedays I like to make lunch for these kind young men." She turned to Malik and Bakura, "I hope my son hasn't been rude to you two."
"Not at all Mrs.M'." Malik replied, "It was an honour to have him as our guest."
"B-But!" Yami pointed out past the doorway, "You said I was the first to get through that damn forest!"
"Well, you are." Bakura added. "Did you fail to notice the intercom located on the first dark tree on the right? Its not hard to find you know." He folded his arms, "All you had to do was say the correct password and then the forest would have remained in a normal state. Well, what I mean to say by normal is that you wouldn't have been running on the brink of death."
"Intercom! I never saw one! And even so, I wouldn't know the password!"
"The password should have been obvious to you." Malik said, "Its 'brownies'."
Yami dropped to his knees, slowly rocking back and forth as his head hit the nearby wall, "Stupid perverts... stupid mom... stupid revealing and easy access brownie skirt..."
Mrs. Muto sighed, handing out some food to the so-called kind young men. "Here you go boys!"
"Thanks Mrs. M'!" The pair chorused.
The woman nodded before peering round the pair to stare at her son, "Yami, I think you should stop bothering these men and come home. After all, we've just finished selling every single box of brownies down at the hut!"
"Yeah, all except mine." Yami grumbled, "They wouldn't buy them off me!" He whined, glaring up at Malik and Bakura. The white haired male reached into his pocket, taking out a note and handing it to Mrs. Muto. "I know you don't like close friends paying for the brownies, but this time I insist."
"Close friends!" Yami whispered, "Who does that guy think he is!"
"That's so nice of you 'Kura!" Mrs. Muto beemed, clasping her hands together while making sure she didn't drop her basket at the same time. "Well, it been lovely seeing you two again. Enjoy the lunch won't you?"
"Will do Mrs. M'!" Bakura and Malik replied.
"As for you Yami, we have your future to plan!" The woman said.
"HUH!"
Mrs. Muto held a hand to her forehead, "I was thinking that because you're 17 now, it won't be long till you leave our home and live somewhere else. That's when the thought hit me! You can stay with Bakura and Malik!"
"ARE YOU CRAZY!" Yami screamed while flailing his arms about. "HERE? WITH THESE GUYS!"
"Yes!" His mother said, "Its the perfect option! Besides, this house is only next door to our place."
"Next... door!" The teen narrowed his eyes as she pointed over to a fence beyond the forest, "Yes, over that fence is our street, and as you know, our house is the last building on that street."
Yami shook his head, laughing nervously, "No... no... It can't be. Are you telling me these guys are our neighbours!"
"If that's the way you want to see it, then yes. They are."
"I DON'T BELIEVE IT!" The teen continued to rant, "I walked all the way up the street when I could have gone over a damn fence!"
His mother let out a laugh and nodded in reply, grabbing hold of his shirt afterwards, "There's no time to waste Yami! Your future awaits!"
The pair watched as Yami was dragged away, waving at him with matching grins. "Be sure to hurry Mrs. M'! The sooner, the better we say!"
Yami let out a whimper as he was ushered along, the same group of brownies he had talked to before stood watching his desperate attempt to avoid his doomed fate.
"Wowie Mr.Weirdo lover! You're finally going to live with the weirdos!" The main girl called.
Yami gritted his teeth, "I TOLD YOU BEFORE, I DO NOT LOVE WEIRDOS!"
A sigh escaped Bakura's lips as he turned on his heel, "Well, it seems like we have a new friend to come play with us..."
Malik nodded with a smirk, heading into the living room. "So it does bunny."
Brown orbs caught sight of an empty jar that sat on the kitchen counter, a sly smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. Meanwhile, Malik slumped down on the sofa, ready waiting his new play toy's return. He took a glance at the cofee table before raising an eyebrow, realising he hadn't drunk his tea yet.
A short silence that had soon occured was broken by the sound of spluttering, and an anrgry Malik.
"BAKURA! WHY IS THERE SUGAR IN MY TEA!"
Alas we are soon approaching the end of our tale. Yami's fate was undeniable as he was soon whisked away from his safe haven of a home to live with two young, lusting men who couldn't wait to play with their brownie boy again.
However Yami's main concern was his mom's anxiety to get him out of the house. Nevertheless, a happy ending shall await Yami, but so far that doesn't seem likely.
So, have you gained anything from reading this? If not, then I shall tell you the moral of this story.
"Don't be a brownie, become a scout instead!"
(End Chapter)
Mai/sniff/ That was beautiful...
Yugi/turns into Yami/ You only think that because you typed it!
Mai: Yes, its true. But its YOUR turn to type next!
Yami/starts crying/ But that means I have to type about Bakura and Malik scaring me!
Mai/sigh/ Well, that's all we have time for people. See you all next chapter, when my sister will continue the saga of-
Yami: 'THE RANDOMNESS OF YAMISHIPPING!'