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For several seconds, they remained quite still.
Charlotte could taste the firewhiskey on their lips and could smell the soft lingering scents the marsh had left on him. She could feel his breath hitch as their lips touched.
She envisioned him grasping her face in his drunken stupor and kissing her harshly. She imagined him spewing lines of wanting her. She pictured him pressing his body against hers. Perhaps these were all things she desperately needed to hear, to feel.
But instead, the potion master leaned forward for just a moment and allowed their lips to truly feel one another. His mouth moved in a soft, gentle way to cover her own before he slowly pulled away.
In a moment, it was over, and Severus was standing up with his glass of whiskey.
"Goodnight, Charlotte," he said finally, as he reached the stairs.
As she listened to him climb the stairs to his bedroom, Charlotte felt her breath hitch.
For some reason or another, her eyes began to sting.
It wasn't rejection, really, she argued with herself.
She took his seat in the armchair, still warm from his body.
After all, he had reciprocated, she reasoned.
Charlotte didn't know why she suddenly felt the urge to cry.
Finishing her firewhiskey, Charlotte began to clear the destruction. She swept up the broken particles of glass and put the tomes of text away upon the shelf and reassembled broken picture frames as best she could without magic.
When she had calmed herself, she stepped out into the yard and found her way to the cool bench outside and turned her face to the stars.
Severus Snape was not unattractive, she decided.
Despite her misgivings about him at Hogwarts, Charlotte decided that there were attractive features of the potions master.
During her time as a Death Eater, she had seen him shirtless several times as they changed after raids. Though he was not as muscular or built as Sirius had been, he had an admirable figure. His arms were strong and toned, and his hands were broad and strong. He wasn't the stretched out, thinly muscled man that Regulus had been, nor was he the stocky one Sirius had been. No, Severus landed somewhere in between.
But more than his physical attributes, there was something about Snape's mind that seemed to catch her breath in her throat.
Though she would have been unsuited to explain it to anyone else, there was a deep kindness in Severus that she doubted many others had been given the privilege of seeing. After all, he had married her to save her, in a way. He had taken her under his wing during the war. Though he had his own reasons – and Charlotte doubted she would ever be privy to all of them – Severus had decided to be kind to her, with little reason at all.
And above his kindness and all the soft parts of him she could imagine and conjure up, there was the very essence of him all.
Severus Snape was perhaps the most cunning man she had ever met.
Charlotte had been Sorted into Slytherin without much hesitation. Both of her parents had been in Slytherin, her grandparents had been in Slytherin. It seemed destiny that she would be in the same House as her family. It was tradition, after all. But there had been a moment, perhaps, in which she had longed to be in Gryffindor, or Ravenclaw. It had lingered at the cusp of her mind until the Hat had rested upon her frizzy coffee-colored hair and then the Sorting Hat had reminded her.
She was too conniving to be anything other than a Slytherin.
After all, Charlotte had little qualm of doing what she must in order to save her own skin.
So perhaps it was natural, she reasoned under the night sky, that a man who was sensibly attractive, kind, and Slytherin to his very core, would evoke these feelings.
There was something to be said of a wizard who could fool the Dark Lord.
There was something, she allowed herself, sinisterly attractive about it.
"But it's Snape," she said aloud.
Snape with his dithering glares and long nose; that greasy hair.
She let out a noise of frustration and kicked her heels.
You'll stay here. With me.
Charlotte would not deny that every fiber of her being wanted to run. The thought of the Dark Lord returning, of the brand on her forearm becoming alive once more, made her skin crawl. She had been asked to do many things in service to the Dark Lord, and though she could reason away her crimes, they had left a stain on her.
The obscurus.
With just thinking the word, she felt something shift and move inside of her like smoke beneath her skin.
She recalled the burnt shell of her father's apothecary in Knockturn Alley, the embers lighting the night sky. Though she had not seen the totality of her destruction, Charlotte had heard that at least three other buildings had been destroyed, and that Dumbledore had instructed Order members to obliviate anyone who had seen more than they should have.
Despite the few hours of sleep she had gotten at the Burrow, Charlotte fell exhaustion taking its toll on her. She made her way back into the house as the sun began to rise and looked at the clock hanging above the staircase.
In a few hours, someone from the Order would be arriving. Charlotte wondered exactly what that would entail as she began sorting through the cupboards for the tea tin. She set the kettle on and began combing through the drawers for a vial of Invigoration Draught.
As the kettle whistled, Charlotte heard Severus moving about upstairs and snagged another vial of the draught. She took out another cup and saucer, leaving it on the counter as she poured her own brew and hurried up the stairs before she heard his bedroom door open.
He would be hungover, she reasoned, as she began sorting through her things brought from the Leaky Cauldron.
He might not remember the evening at all, she found herself hoping suddenly, as she pulled a sundress over her head.
When she finally had decided she looked presentable enough for company, Charlotte ventured back down the stairs, winding her long hair into a messy bun atop her head.
Severus looked up at her from the edge of his morning's copy of the Daily Prophet.
As she moved around him to set her cup and saucer in the sink, his hand reached out and grabbed hers. His thumb pressed into her palm for just a moment.
"Thank you for the tea," he murmured, releasing her hand, "And the potion."
"You're welcome," she pressed her hand to her warm cheek, "Are you feeling better?"
"Significantly."
They stood for several moments in the kitchen, Charlotte washing her cup and saucer as Severus drank his own tea and thumbed through the pages of his paper.
"Who is coming today?"
"Lupin, I believe."
"Ah."
Severus glanced up at her and rose a brow, "I will not be attending your lesson."
Charlotte paused in her efforts to dry the saucer, "Oh."
"Monosyllabic answers are beneath you, Charlotte."
Startled, she looked at him. He was watching her expressionlessly.
"You don't like him – Remus,"
"I do not care for him."
"Are you going to leave?"
Severus snorted, "I have far too many lesson plans to arrange to take the day off, Charlotte."
Charlotte wondered if he would hide away in the basement for the day.
Severus kept his basement in almost sterile condition, and Charlotte had been given strict instruction to never enter it without his permission. It held his office, his potion stores, and his brewing stations. Charlotte had never had any inclination to go down there, recalling the odors that still lingered in the house during the school year.
"As I have no idea what kind of home the wolf keeps, nor do I especially trust his ability to understand your condition, you will be holding your lessons here."
She shifted on her feet.
"What year are you doing lesson plays for," she offered in hopes of changing the conversation.
Charlotte had no particular loyalty to Remus, but she disliked that Severus seemed to simply refer to him by his condition. Sirius had always been especially protective of Remus, she recalled.
Severus turned the page of his paper, "Third year."
"The Wiggenweld Potion, then?"
He blinked, looking up at her, "Yes, as well as others."
"Girding Potion, Confusing Concoction, Shrinking Solution, Wideye Potion, and…" Charlotte drifted off.
"Antidote to Uncommon Poisons."
"Ah, yes, that's the one."
"You recall your potions lessons."
"My father was an apothecary owner, Sev, I know my potions."
He was watching her now as she began to put away their breakfast tea spread.
"What cauldron is quickest for the Wideye Potion?"
"Copper," she answered, raising a brow as she turned to him.
"What is the final ingredient to the Wiggenweld Potion?"
"Boom berry juice."
Severus paused.
"What are the three primary ingredients to the Confusing Concoction?"
"Scurvy grass, lovage, and sneezewort."
"Correct."
Charlotte smiled to herself and turned to close the tea tin.
"You may assist me after your lessons."
Her smile broadened, "Okay."
By the time Remus had arrived, Severus had already descended to his work. Charlotte had finished a second vial of Invigoration Draught and was deciding what to cook for dinner.
"What have you been working on here?"
Charlotte hastily seized the slip of parchment Remus had reached for on the kitchen counter and held it behind her back, "Nothing."
Remus grinned and reached around her, and despite her loud protests, fished the parchment from her fingers.
"Dinner plans?"
She colored.
"I've never cooked for Severus before."
Remus continued to grin at her, "And it looks like you're planning quite the menu. Any occasion?"
"No!" Charlotte covered her mouth at the shout, "I just want it to be nice."
Passing the parchment back to her, Remus continued to grin as she tucked it away in a drawer and followed him to the living room.
Before Severus had descended to the basement, he had moved around the furniture to allow for a reasonable amount of standing space. Living in a muggle neighborhood, they were not able to conduct their lesson outside as Charlotte would have preferred, but Severus had cast several protective charms and removed most of the breakable objects from the room.
"What are we going to be doing today?"
"Summoning charms."
Charlotte blinked, "Summoning charms?"
Remus deposited an object on the fireplace mantle and moved to sit on the sofa. He looked gangly there, with his too-thin frame and his long legs, Charlotte noted. He wasn't the golden-haired, smiling boy she had known him to be at Hogwarts.
"You know all of the spells. I don't need to teach you the basics. Summoning charms are about channeling your magic on to a single object, which is something you're struggling with."
"I make things explode, Remus. I hope whatever it is you're wanting me to summon isn't sentimental."
She glanced to the mantle, where she noted Remus had placed a goblet.
It was metal, she realized, with relief.
"In obscurials, their magic manifests as a physical object – a black cloud, or black smoke. Normally, your magic is part of your being. But because you've been repressing your magic, it's taken its own form."
"What is a summoning charm going to do to fix this?"
"Dumbledore and I agree that focusing your magic with intent and purpose may allow your obscurus to be reabsorbed. You will have to start using magic every day, even if it's just a cleaning charm."
She hesitated, "Those don't work either."
Remus patted the seat next to him, "With time, they will."
Charlotte dropped onto the sofa next to him and stared at the goblet.
"But first, Charlie, I must ask you something."
She had taken her wand out and placed it on her lap.
Cherry and Dragon Heartstring, 13 inches. Give this one a go, my dear.
Charlotte still recalled the day Ollivander had placed the tapered wand in her hand. It had been beautiful, she had noted, carved carefully with tiny cherry blossoms and dragon claws.
A truly lethal power.
When those words had left Ollivander's mouth, Charlotte had wanted to give the wand back to him, despite feeling as though it had been an extension of her very arm.
"Why did you stop using your magic?"
Caught from her thoughts, Charlotte mulled several answers in her mouth, before she looked up at Remus blankly.
There had been no particularly conscious decision, she decided. After the war, Charlotte had tried to limit her use of her wand because rumors had begun circulating that the Ministry of Magic had put the trace back on wands to determine if any curses were being used in the wizarding community.
It had been a baseless rumor, and one that had been proven false numerous times. However, Charlotte had one day looked at the cherry wand and realized that those careful words from Ollivander had become true.
A truly lethal power.
Charlotte had murdered people with it. She had tortured numerous people with it, and she had cursed just as many. With this wand, Charlotte had turned from a naïve school girl into a cunning murderer. Try as she might to will her guilt away, it ate at her slowly, taking slow measured bites with every face that flittered through her mind.
"I killed people with that wand," she said finally, her voice barely above a whisper.
Remus said nothing, his eyes falling to the piece of woodwork in her lap.
"I tortured people, and I cursed them," Charlotte found her throat closing, "Because he told me to."
"You were protecting yourself, Charlie," Remus said finally, but his voice was strained.
"And then, you know, he found out that I was good at certain things."
The wizard beside her turned, waiting patiently, his face impassive.
Charlotte swallowed, "Like possession."
She watched the color change in Remus's face, turning pale beneath his tan.
"I didn't mean to be good at it," she said suddenly, "It just happened."
"Possession, Charlie?"
In the wizarding community, possession was perhaps one of the most sinister capabilities a witch or wizard could hold. Aside from the killing curse, possession was one of the most punishable offenses. It allowed a witch or wizard to assume control over a body without any spoken incantations or curses and allowed them access to every thought or memory they held.
Charlotte had become incredibly adept at possession, under the hands of Severus. It came hand-in-hand with Occlumency and Legilimency. He had tutored her dutifully until she could slip into the mind of some of the most talented aurors the Ministry of Magic had held. She could crack their minds open and spill every secret they kept – possession removed all signs of occlumency, it destroyed every wall ever built within the mind.
And when Charlotte had fished out all the information she could discover from them, the Dark Lord instructed her to end them. Most often, Charlotte did so by carefully placing thoughts and doubts in the mind, removing any semblance of joy or happiness from their conscious, until the possessed wizard or witch had seen no other option but to kill themselves.
"I wasn't good at anything else, Remus, I tried!" Her voice was raising, growing desperate at his horrified expression, "I tried to be good at anything - anything else, I swear."
"Does Dumbledore know about this?"
"Yes," Severus had appeared in the doorway from the basement, "He is aware."
Charlotte looked up at him with tearful eyes, "I'm sorry, I was too loud."
"Charlotte was incredibly proficient at possession and mind work," Severus continued, "Because I taught her to be useful to the Dark Lord. She did not need to risk her life in raids or in duels, I ensured it."
Remus watched Severus move to the kitchen, "I'm certain you did everything you could to help her, Severus."
"I believe you are here to teach my wife how to channel her magic appropriately, Lupin. It is not your place to judge the actions of witch who suffered at the hands of the Dark Lord for mere survival. I suggest that the topic of your conversation return to her lessons."
"My apologies."
Remus turned to Charlotte, who was staring at the wand on her lap as though any moment it would burn her.
"I'm sorry, Charlie," Remus whispered to her, "It wasn't my place."
"I tried to be good at anything else," she whimpered.
"I'm sure you did. It's nothing to be ashamed of."
"I didn't want to do it," a sob caught in her throat.
"Your lessons can resume tomorrow, Lupin," Severus said finally.
Charlotte stared at the toes of his shoes as they stood before her brimming eyes.
"I didn't want to do it, Severus," She said as a sob loosened, "I really didn't want to."
"You can see yourself out."
Severus caught her elbow and raised her to her feet, carefully guiding her away from the sofa and plucking her wand from her lap. He tucked it in her pocket carefully as he moved her to the doorway leading to the basement.
"Charlie, I'll see you tomorrow."
Remus sounded immeasurably sad, she recognized beyond the slow whine that had gathered in her throat and made her chest burn.
"I didn't want to do it," she whispered.
"Goodbye, Lupin," Snape's voice was cold.
As Severus followed her down the stairway, Charlotte tried to calm her shaking hands. By the time they reached the stone floor of Severus's office, however, her entire body trembled.
No sooner had he landed on the bottom stair did Severus suddenly seize her. His arms crushed her back against his chest.
For a moment, Charlotte tried to draw away from him. She wanted to steel herself, to resume the carefully constructed walls in her mind as she felt Severus pressing into her thoughts.
"It was necessary," he said, his voice uncharacteristically soft, "You needed to learn."
"I could've done something else, Sev," she sobbed suddenly, turning to look at him with wide eyes that had begun to stream.
She wondered how often she had cried in front of Severus Snape.
"There was nothing else," he said fiercely, "Nothing else that you could have done."
"I was a good duelist!"
"You would have been killed by aurors."
"I could've done it!"
"You would have died, Charlotte," Severus took a menacing step towards her, "You would be dead, now. Is that what you want?"
Charlotte wondered for a moment if it was what she wanted, and no sooner had the thought entered her mind did the wizard reach out and crush her to his chest.
"Never," he said, and his voice was soft, velvet thunder.
She allowed herself to sag in his arms and took gulping breaths in between her cries. Severus held her still against him, his firm arms tight around her. His fingers reached up to smooth her hair carefully, and when she had stilled, he turned her in his arms to face him.
His face was angry, and Charlotte swallowed.
"The wolf has no business discussing this with you," Severus growled, "And I will not permit it. You will tell me if he goes fishing again."
Charlotte nodded.
"He was afforded opportunities in this life that we were not given. He was never forced to cast away his morals for the sake of his own survival. He was never asked to do as we were."
She wiped her cheeks.
"You will feel no shame for those actions, Charlotte. I taught you to be skilled in possession. I made you useful to the Dark Lord. If there is any shame to be felt, Charlotte, I would feel it and there is not a moment that passes in which I feel shame for ensuring your survival in that war."
Charlotte stood before him as he adjusted his shirt and glanced at the wet spot her tears had made on his shoulder. In a moment, it had disappeared.
"I request your assistance with my lesson plans. Do you feel up to this?"
The corners of her mouth turned, "I do."
"Good, please bring over that stack. They are last year's lessons and I found that there is much improvement to be made for these idiots Dumbledore puts in my dungeons."
Charlotte was smiling by the time she grabbed hold the stack of lesson plans, and found her trembles easing with each assignment they crafted together.
She had done plenty of shameful things during the war under service to the Dark Lord. There were things she was not proud of, she allowed, but for now at least the Dark Lord was gone. She wasn't obligated to crack open minds anymore or spill dread into their judgement.
As she carefully wrote Severus's plans for his new third years – and Charlotte was beginning to realize how lenient Slughorn had been – Charlotte decided she wouldn't do it again. Maybe she would never be able to, she thought, and perhaps that wouldn't be such a bad thing.
A smile crept across her face.
Here is Chapter Seven, lovelies. Your reviews brighten my world and make me do many cartwheels.
I have decided to begin looking for a beta reader, and if you have any recommendations please send them my way!
Fun game - please leave your House in the Review Section, we'll see who wins the House Cup by the end of this fanfic! :)