Disclaimer: None of the characters in here are mine… okay, so there are a few made up people, like a few nameless paramedics I could claim were mine, but I don't want them. I want Slade and Robin though. So bad it hurts.
A/N: This one won the vote! I hope you enjoy!
To Protect and to Serve
Robin tensed as his private line rang. Batman seldom had good news. Robin had a nagging feeling that, this time, it was disastrous. He was right.
"It's that time of year again, Robin."
"Noooo… Bruce, please?" Robin groaned.
"No, Dick. We agreed. If you were to leave and start your own team you still had to do your duties a few times a year… or do you want to come back to Gotham permanently?"
Robin knew Bruce wasn't serious. Well, not completely serious, anyway. This was a ritual of theirs.
"Okay… when and where?" Robin sighed dejectedly.
"The Wayne Corporation Christmas Ball will be held at the Royal this year." Bruce said, not without a hint of despair in his own voice. "Unfortunately it's not as straightforward this time. There have been threats."
Robin immediately perked up.
"Really? When? How? Towards what?"
"The past week. Letters. Towards us." Bruce answered with a smirk.
"What? I mean… Towards Batman, or?"
"No, Bruce Wayne and Richard Grayson. The threats were very clear."
"Sooo…. We don't go?" Robin asked hopefully. The event they were discussing was simply the official 'showing off' of Robin's other personality. Richard 'Dick' Grayson was supposed to spend his time at schools abroad, but he needed to show his face now and then, to appease the press and the society. Robin dreaded the events, two or three a year, because now, when he was so used to being Robin, he was afraid to slip up. Oh, and the things were deadly boring as well.
"The Wayne-family do not back down in these situations." Bruce said sternly, and Robin rolled his eyes. "I saw that." the man told him, though he couldn't possibly have, as the teen had his mask on. "The company has assigned even more bodyguards to me, the place is like a fortress." Bruce continued.
"Ahhh… so that's why you are sounding so cranky!" Robin grinned.
"Careful, Dick, you'll regret that in a moment." Bruce smirked.
"What? No? No, I don't need any, do I? I mean, you can just have someone pick me up at the airport?"
"Sorry, the company-security has deemed the risks too great. Luckily I was able to personally arrange your escort. His name is Slade Wilson."
Bruce had to wait quite a while for Robin to stop coughing.
"S-slade?"
"Yes. You've heard of him? Do you have a cold, by the way?"
"Just… just had some trouble… swallowing…" Robin stuttered. "Slade… isn't he a criminal?"
"He has had some… questionable alliances, in the past, yes-"
"Then why-"
"Because he has never broken a contract and he has a one hundred percent success-record. With Slade you get what you pay for, and trust me, I've paid a lot."
"But-?"
"He has done a great deal of body-guard work and never lost a client. Other people can be bribed. Slade can't."
"…" Robin wanted to say a few choice words, but nothing was really fitting. He hadn't told Bruce about Slade at all in the past, feeling it was his job to deal with the man, and now he kinda regretted it.
"You are to meet Slade at the airport on Friday, . Casual dress."
"I know, I've done this before…" Robin snorted.
"So… not going to ask me how you'll recognize him, then?" Bruce grinned.
Robin's heart suddenly started to beat faster. Slade wasn't going to be wearing his mask? Well, he guessed the man would be shot by some nervous security-guard at the airport if he did, but…
"Umm… yeah… how?"
"You won't miss him. Tall, big guy, white hair, black eye-patch." Bruce said.
"White hair?" Robin scrunched his nose a little. Slade seemed buff, not old!
"He lost his hair colour in an experiment, apparently. I'm not going to lay your life in the hands of a senior citizen." Bruce explained, having interpreted Robin's expression in a slightly less gay way.
"Yeah… great…" Robin muttered. "This is so stupid! You know I'll be perfectly safe! I can even fly there myself!"
"Robin will be safe, yes, but remember, you are supposed to be Dick then. He doesn't have your skills, he needs protection. So please try to act like you do, even though it's annoying as hell." Bruce added the last in a mutter, clearly speaking from his own experiences.
"Yeah, yeah… it's only for one night, how bad can it be?" Robin sighed.
"Well, it's two nights, really." Bruce said. "You'll arrive here late on Friday, and the ball is Saturday night. You'll be going home on Sunday."
"Wonderful… Errrr… where is Slade staying?"
"Here. He insisted on having complete access, to be able to protect you to his full capability." Bruce said. "He'll have the guestroom next to yours."
"But-!" Robin started.
"At this point I think you should be grateful you'll be allowed to shower alone…" Bruce snorted, not really understanding why Robin blushed so at his little joke.
They ended the call soon after, and Robin felt the need to go beat the crap out of a few gym-utensils. He didn't like Dick. Or, to be more accurate; he didn't like how people perceived him. Everyone expected him to be a snobbish, spoilt brat, and, sometimes, just to be left alone, Robin accepted that role. He couldn't fight it, anyway, because if he stayed quiet, people seemed to think that Robin thought he was too good to talk to them, and if he tried to be nice he was a deemed a 'playboy' like Bruce. He couldn't win. Robin suddenly stopped, mid punch, and grinned to himself. He had been worried about meeting Slade, but it wasn't he who would be spending time with the man. It was Richard. Robin's grin widened. Yeah… let's see how Slade deals with Dick…
At six o'clock sharp Robin stepped out from a taxi at the airport. He waited, obviously impatiently, as the driver unpacked his suitcases, three of them, all as heavy as lead. The rich knew how to travel well. He had had to search the Tower for things to pack in the end.
Robin spotted Slade immediately, but ignored him until the man walked up and introduced himself.
"Richard? I'm Slade Wilson." The man only had a small duffle-bag and seemed to sneer at Robin's packing.
Robin gave him a once over.
"Oh? The man Bruce hired? Well… you'll do, I guess, though he wouldn't let me see any of your credentials." Robin looked down his nose at the man, which was quite a feat since he was almost three heads taller. "I would appreciate it if you would refrain from using my first name, though. However, our butler calls me 'Master Richard' so I guess you could too." Robin made a gesture of obvious benevolence.
Robin noticed that Slade's jaw seemed a bit tense already, and had to hide a smile by looking around.
"I say, the service is poor here. Would you fetch a trolley for my bags, I really hate standing on the curb."
"I'm not here to carry your bags, Master Richard." Slade growled.
"No? Well, go fetch a piccolo then! Really, Wilson, you are quite useless, aren't you?"
Robin was pretty sure that Slade would snap before they even got on the plane, but the man was surprisingly stoical, the teen had to admit. Even as Robin made a fuss about the seats, making the stewardess move them two times before he was happy, Slade just seemed to go along with it all. He took his job seriously, though, Robin noticed how he scanned the other passengers, made sure Robin's soda wasn't opened beforehand, checking the staff's ID-badges. Robin actually felt looked after…
"So, Wilson…" he started, an hour or so into the flight, when he couldn't stand the silence any longer and the fashion-magazine for men he had pretended to read, almost made him want to scream. "… you are a body-guard full time, then?"
"No, I usually kill people." Slade said, stone faced.
Trying to scare the little rich kid, are we, Slade? Robin smirked inwardly.
"Oh. Good money in that?" Robin asked, sounding interested.
"Quite." Slade half turned to face him, arching an eyebrow.
Robin couldn't help but let his eyes wander. Slade was rather gorgeous, actually. How old could he be? Over thirty, certainly, he had to be judging by the way he spoke and moved… and his eye… the look in that seemed much older, but his face and body looked… just… perfect.
Robin glanced upwards again, only to meet a smirk.
Fuck! I'm not wearing my mask! He could actually SEE me looking! Robin realized, wanting to take a walk outside the plane for a bit. Slade didn't comment, however, just turned back to studying a map of Gotham. No one moved around them without having Slade watching them intently. Robin wondered if the man had spotted anyone suspicious, it would be interesting to know how he worked.
"Soo… anyone on the plane out to get me then?" he asked casually.
"Don't be scared, Master Richard, I'll protect you." Slade smirked.
Robin felt his mind split in two. One, the larger part, was very insulted, but the one, slightly smaller part, was melting into a happily sighing goo. Majority got the floor, however.
"I'm not scared!" he snarled haughtily. "It's not like I don't deal with weirdoes every day!"
"Oh, yes, the troublesome life of a millionaire…" Slade muttered.
The comment felt unexpectedly hurtful. Sure, everyone thought Richard was a spoilt brat, but, for some reason, Robin didn't want Slade to. Not really.
"I'm not a millionaire, I was just raised by one." he muttered.
"Lucky you."
"Yes." Robin mumbled solemnly and looked away.
Robin frowned as he glared out the window. The last thing he had wanted to be with Slade was personal! Even so, the man had managed to crack his 'spoilt brat'-shell a little. Well. No more. Robin decided it shouldn't matter what Slade thought, just as long as he gave the man a hard time. He had lots of reasons for revenge, after all. At this moment, he wasn't up for a fight, though. He decided he would get some sleep, and turned towards Slade.
"Get me another pillow, Wilson."
"I thought I made it clear; I am not here to wait on you." the man growled.
"Yes, yes, your service-level is horribly poor, I get it, but the extra pillows are in the overhead compartment and I would have to climb over you to get them. I would rather avoid that."
"You would?" Slade smirked. "Really?"
The briefest of blushes rushed over Robin's cheeks, but Richard didn't get easily embarrassed, and somehow, staying in character helped. Richard decided to teach Slade a lesson. Robin went along with the idea out of curiosity.
There was enough leg-room in first class so that the teen could easily avoid doing what he did, but there were principles at stake. Robin half rolled over in his seat and then climbed over Slade, stopping half way so he was sitting straddling his lap, facing him.
"Is this what you thought I wanted to do?" Robin whispered huskily, grinding a bit into the man under him.
"Pretty much, yes." Slade agreed, smirking.
Robin, or rather Richard, grabbed Slade's hands and placed them on his ass.
"Feel this?" he purred, leaning closer to the man's face. His heart skipped a beat as Slade actually did take a feel. "This…" Robin continued, "you'll only touch again in your dreams… Because I would never degrade myself enough to frolic with the staff!" he hissed the last part out, putting as much venom in his words as he could. Then he quickly climbed off on Slade's other side, grabbed a few pillows and made a point of walking back, throwing himself down in his seat and piling the pillows against the wall before trying to make himself comfortable.
"That was cute… and almost believable too." Slade whispered, sounding very amused. Both Robin and Richard pretended they hadn't heard.
Once he fell asleep, Robin found that he slept surprisingly well. He just wished he hadn't woken up as he did, leaning against Slade's arm.
He jerked away, thus letting the man know he was awake.
"You are rather affectionate when you are asleep." the man grinned. "You should try being unconscious more. Might improve your image. On the other hand I'm glad you stopped drooling on me."
"I don't drool!" Robin exclaimed, wiping some evidence from the side of his face.
"No, no, I'm sure the stains will prove to be other bodily fluids…" Slade seemed to roll his eye.
"You are just… vile!" the teen snorted, trying not to crack a grin. Slade had a sense of humor, of sorts, who knew?
"Mmm, I know. It's in my job description." the man nodded.
The rest of the flight was spent mostly in silence, but it wasn't especially awkward. Some sort of truce had formed, for now, and they exchanged jibes in almost a friendly way.
As they landed, Slade guided him quickly through security and then stopped two men from entering a cab.
"This one's ours." he said, his mere tone making the businessmen back away.
"A cab, Wilson? Is this really secure enough? Why not rent a car?"
"I've rented two. One in Wayne's name, one in yours. If someone had planned to attack you at the airport, they would be waiting by, or have tampered with, those two."
"Oh… so decoys, then? You might not be quiet as stupid as I thought…" Robin said benevolently.
"Why, thank you, brat."
"Bruce will fire you if he hears you call me that." Robin warned.
"Really? I thought he might agree." Slade smirked.
When they arrived at the manor Slade would let Robin out of reach even after they got inside. Robin pulled away, however, to hug Alfred.
"Hi, Al! Where's Bruce?" he said as the man led them into the smaller, cozier, sitting room.
"Still at work, I'm afraid, Master Richard. I've been asked to make sure you are settled."
"I want to check out his room and the perimeter first." Slade said, interrupting any plans Robin might have had. "Richard, you are to stay here while I do."
"Come on, Wilson! We're at the manor! It's safe!" Robin rolled his eyes.
"I've spotted two major security faults so far, so I beg to differ."
"Really, what?"
"I'd rather not waste time trying to explain them to you. Stay here. Mr. Pennyworth, if you would…?"
Alfred, who seemed slightly surprised about the way Robin was acting, nodded before turning to the teen. "I've made some sandwiches for you." he gestured at the nearby coffee-table. "There's hot chocolate as well." he added in a tone suggesting that Robin might be a bit less cranky if he ate. Robin grinned back, deciding to clue the butler in later.
"Thanks Alfred… you're the best!" he declared.
The old man muttered something under his breath like he always did when he got embarrassed, and then he escorted Slade upstairs.
It took the man an hour to completely comb the room before he judged it safe. Robin was pretty sad he missed the procedure; it would probably been very interesting.
When the man came downstairs and ordered Robin to keep waiting in the room, the teen had had enough, however.
"This is stupid! I'm going up to have a shower, I'm not sitting here rotting for another minute!" he snarled and got up.
He made it to the stairs before he was grabbed from behind, hoisted over a shoulder and carried back. Slade dumped him back in the armchair like he was a sack of garbage, pointed at him and said "Stay!".
Robin's eyes were very wide and he couldn't think of a single way to respond. Alfred, however, didn't have that problem.
"My, my, Mr. Wilson. I'm starting to wish you were around when Master Richard was a child. Master Bruce too, come to think of it."
"It's my pleasure." Slade purred and walked out to continue his job. "And if you are thinking of taking that shower, Master Richard, don't think for even a moment that I wouldn't come to get you and carry you down here again, naked or not."
"Thanks for that one, Al…" Robin muttered when they were alone.
"I gather you know this man?"
"Robin does. He's a criminal, more or less… Don't tell Bruce I know him! He doesn't know that I'm Richard, though, so I decided to give him a hard time."
"I see… and how is that working out?" the old man smiled.
"Fantastic… as you can see…" Robin muttered and drew his knees up.
Another ninety minutes went by, and Robin didn't move from the chair. He really didn't know why. He wanted to, but he tried to convince himself that the book he was reading was far too interesting. Yeah. Right. It was a coffee-table book on grapes.
Robin had almost nodded off, curled up in his chair, when Slade came back.
"I've spoken to the outside security about what measurements need to be taken." he said, not even commenting on the fact that Robin was still there. The teen didn't know if he should be grateful about that, or insulted that the man seemed to have taken the fact for granted.
"Yeah, great… can I take a shower now?" Robin muttered sullenly.
"Of course. I'll escort you." Slade nodded like he had never refused Robin this comfort.
"Are you going to wash my back too?" Robin sneered, starting to feel cranky for real.
"I'm sure you can manage… you have a butler, after all." the man shrugged.
Robin was muttering rather nasty things under his breath as he climbed the stairs with Slade in tow. The man even tried to enter the room with him.
"You can wait outside, like a good watch-dog." Robin hissed and slammed the door shut in the man's face, locking it quickly. A second later there was no door in the frame at all.
"Security flaw number six, I think…" Slade said, calmly setting the door aside.
"What the hell?!" Robin exclaimed.
"I merely lifted it off its hinges in a demonstration." The man explained.
"You can't do that when it's closed! And locked!" Robin snarled, in spite of the evidence which suggested the opposite.
"This door… it must have been replaced in the last… eight to ten years?"
Robin suddenly remembered that it had. He had just started practicing with his bird-a-rangs and had thought it was a good idea to but a target board on his door… Unfortunately, being a beginner, he didn't hit the target as much as the door, leaving the latter with deep gashes. It had been replaced with a cheaper one, temporarily, and then, it seemed, the matter had been forgotten.
"Yes, so?" Robin asked defensively. A door was a door.
"It was poorly fitted. There was enough of a gap so it could be lifted slightly, and the lock didn't match the frame well enough either. This door isn't a barricade, it's a road bump."
Robin swallowed. He hade never realized. Sure, he considered himself safe in the manor, but…
"Oh." he said. "Err... well… can you put it back now? Please?"
"Just don't try to pull any of your little stunts again, young man. I'm here for your sake, after all."
"Can I lock the bathroom door?" Robin drawled.
"No."
"What!?"
"There will be no locked doors. This mansion could come under attack at any moment, and I must be able to reach you in seconds. In fact, I'll be sleeping in here tonight."
"No, your'e-"
"No objections! I settled for the room next to you because I expected this building to have top-of-the-line security. Frankly, I'm appalled. I'll be having a long conversation with Mr. Wayne this evening… and the Head of Security, if need be."
Robin made a frustrated sound as things were decided over his head again. He really pitied Bruce at that moment; he must feel like this all the time.
"Fine! I'll be in the shower. You better not come in unless there are gun-shots!"
"Believe me; I have no desire to see your scrawny ass." Slade smirked.
Robin stopped in the door to the bathroom, knowing he was being goaded.
"My ass is perfect." he said, turning to look at Slade over his shoulder. "As you very well know…" he smirked.
Robin took his sweet time showering, hoping he was boring Slade like he had been bored before. It was rather late in the evening and Robin yawned as he pulled a towel on. As he came out into his bedroom, he noticed that Slade had put the door back. The man himself was standing by the window, watching the dark grounds. Robin wouldn't be surprised if he could make out every single detail.
Robin yawned again, and a thought occurred to him. He decided, on a whim, to share it with Slade.
"It's strange, flying…" he started. "It doesn't matter if you sleep, you are still tired when you land, and it doesn't matter if the food is actually editable, you're still hungry. It's like the time in the air doesn't… count or something."
"And here I thought you were shallow…" Slade smirked as he turned around, but it was more of a joke than a taunt, and Robin shrugged it off. He noticed that the man's eye lingered a bit on his body, making his pulse quicken again. Robin noticed a change of clothes on his bed at the same moment Slade gestured to them.
"Mr. Pennyworth brought these from your suitcases. He wished to see you about your packing, by the way."
"Oh, didn't I fold everything again?" Robin muttered.
"I think folding a waffle-iron is rather hard. I think he wanted to discuss why it was there in the first place."
"Errr… everybody loves waffles?" Robin tried sheepishly, while hoping his team wouldn't miss it. They probably would. They would be pissed. He had needed heavy things, though, and preferably not ones which could be a clue to who he really was.
"I will put it down to the whims of the rich…" Slade chuckled.
"Hey!"
"That was me being nice. I could have decided you were mentally unstable." Slade let him know.
"Could you just turn around so I can get dressed?" Robin asked pleadingly, as he was not even going to try to bother with getting Slade out of the room.
"Of course. I'll turn this way, shall I?" Slade said, looking back out over the grounds again.
"Fine." Robin muttered and turned around himself before tugging the towel off, hurrying to get dressed.
"Nice view." Slade commented, and Robin looked up, over his shoulder, confused. It was almost pitch black outside and his room didn't face the city-lights. He met Slade's eye in the reflection of the window.
"You… you…" Robin forgot that Richard wasn't a blusher.
"Oh, don't worry. I wasn't looking. Much. Especially not when you bent down to put on your socks." the man smirked.
"Wilson, I think I loathe you." Robin growled, quickly buttoning his shirt.
"Don't worry, I'm used to it…" Slade grinned.
When they got downstairs, Bruce had gotten home, and, even though it was partly the man's fault that Robin was in this situation, he received a big hug.
Bruce's bodyguards were ordered to carry Robin's suitcases upstairs, and Robin looked impressed when they actually did.
"You got them to obey you? How did you train them? Is there a manual? Mine won't do anything!" he said, glaring at Slade.
"I'm here to protect your life, not carry your things." Slade let him know again, and gave the other body-guards a glare, clearly stating he was disgusted with them. The men actually looked a bit ashamed. "Mr. Wayne, I have discovered several security-holes which need to be addressed immediately."
"Then let's do so over dinner." Bruce nodded. "I'll have the chief of security dine with us. I'm sure he can answer any questions better than I."
Robin snorted on the inside. They kept human security to a minimum so they wouldn't accidently discover anything they shouldn't. The man in question was, in fact, head of security of the corporation, more than the manor, a defense he repeatedly used during dinner.
Robin found the dinner-conversation very interesting, especially Slade's suggestions, which all made sense, he had to admit. After getting a glare from Bruce for accidentally asking a bit too intelligent question, however, he merely listened closely.
"Well, this has indeed been enlightening…" Bruce said as they had finished dessert. "Hudson, I expect you to start working on the improvements immediately. Now, Richard, I can see that you are tired after your trip, you should go to bed."
Robin nodded and rose, as did Slade.
"I have arranged for a mattress to be brought into Richard's room for me." the man simply informed them. "I am sure this is no problem."
"None at all. You are simply doing your job." Bruce said, while shooting Robin an apologetic glance. Robin snorted in reply.
"I don't get it… Sl- Wilson said himself that the attack was most likely to come at the actual event…" he complained.
"Maybe that is what they want us to believe." Slade told him. "No more fuss, brat, up to bed."
Robin really had no idea why Bruce found that so funny.
It was difficult to sleep in the same room as Slade. Difficult, because Robin didn't want to think about it as 'hard'. He really didn't want to think about anything as 'hard'. Especially after waking up from his second dream.
Whenever he opened his eyes, Slade had moved. Sometimes he was stretched out on the mattress, fully clothed in a t-shirt and trousers, after taking a shower himself. He looked to be meditating more than sleeping. Sometimes he was by the window, making sure the guard's nightshift took place as planned, Robin guessed. The teen didn't fall into a deeper slumber until the early hours of the morning, but was, thankfully, allowed to sleep until nine.
The morning was great, as Robin spent it talking to Bruce, almost forgetting about Slade's shadow hovering over him. Then the businessman had some work to do in his office, and the day turned boring again. Usually, Robin would be down in the Batcave or out on the grounds. He might even be in the gym, but if he went there now he would have to pretend to be in worse shape than he was so he wouldn't arouse suspicion, and he could forget about acrobatics or fighting practice completely. He spent some time in the kitchen helping Alfred, but the man shooed him out after a while. Since they were going to go out for the evening, the butler didn't have to prepare dinner, and he looked forward to spending a quiet night in front of the TV, watching reruns of EastEnders... there was nothing like British television, after all. Sure, he would worry about his boys, but he did that every night, anyway…
As the time for departure came closer, Robin felt a twist of excitement in his stomach, and his hand seemed to travel to his none-existing belt a lot. It was unusual for him going out into a possibly threatening situation without his weapons, but he had packed a few surprises; a collection of smoke bombs and very small explosives, as well as a few throwing-knives. None of these had any resemblance to what he would carry as Robin, it would look very suspicious, after all, if Richard Grayson started throwing bird-a-rangs.
They arrived at the Royal Hotel under heavy guard, including, of course, Slade. The man was dressed in a dark suit, perfectly cut to allow him full movement, while Robin struggled with his black tux. God, he hated tuxes. Bruce always managed to look good in them, but Robin didn't think he could quite pull it off himself.
Slade looked revolted at the arrangements inside, and was glued to Robin's side… or rather the other way around, because every time Robin tried to take a step in a direction Slade didn't like, the man pulled him closer again.
"Are you trying to help me to walk?" Robin snarled after a while.
"Yes. Apparently brats with a death threat over their heads still don't have enough sense to say away from the windows." Slade hissed back.
Robin muttered to himself. This was Gotham with Gotham villains. Sure, the threat had been unusually inconspicuous, but he really didn't believe any killings would be done by a sniper. Gotham was a city which craved more dramatics than that. A couple of minutes to midnight, he was proved right.
It started with white and silver balloons falling from the ceiling.
"Those are three minutes early!" Slade hissed, having memorized everything from decoration-plans to the names of the waiters.
As they hit the floor, the balloons started to pop, leaving behind slight puffs of smoke, more like dust than anything else. Almost immediately people started to cough.
Robin was pulled back against Slade's chest and a mask was placed over his face, letting him breathe. Robin looked up to see Slade place one over his own face as well.
"Where's Bruce?" the teen asked, looking around. People were on their knees all around them, but the gas didn't seem fatal, as the guests only seemed sleepy and slightly disoriented.
"Don't know, don't care. I'm paid to save you." Slade growled.
"Well, you're not afraid the check will bounce if he dies?" Robin smirked under his mask.
"Point taken. I'll keep an eye out..." Slade promised, just as the glass ceiling shattered.
Robin found himself on the floor, on his hands and knees, with Slade's body covering his, as sharp shards rained down around him. The pieces were thankfully small, and though people around him cried out in pain, Robin hoped they only got flesh-wounds. The position he was in was slightly… disturbing, especially since he moved back a bit to avoid some ricocheting splinters, because then his ass rubbed up against Slade's crotch.
This was no time to enjoy- no, be embarrassed by something like that, however, as things started happening faster and faster. Ropes fell from the sky and suddenly ten or fifteen men were swinging down them, accompanied by manic laughter.
"Oh, no." Robin mumbled. He knew that sound.
"The Joker." Slade confirmed. "I suspected it was one of the nut-cases…" The man crouched lower on the ground, flattening Robin under him.
"I'm pretending to be affected by the gas…" he whispered as Robin heard him cocking a gun. "Hopefully they haven't spotted you yet. When I get up and start firing, I wouldn't mind if you started making yourself useful, Robin."
"What? How? When did you-?"
"From the airport. No rich brat moves like that. Are you armed?"
"Smoke bombs, a few knives…" Robin admitted.
"Here." Something was slipped into his hand, and Robin's fingers closed over the cold cylinder. It was and extendable metal bo-staff, just like his own.
"Thanks, but I can't blow my cover!" Robin whispered urgently.
"It's your cover or your head." Slade told him and jumped to his feet just as the last man landed.
Robin quickly reached for his smoke-bombs, designed to create a thick smoke which wasn't too irritating for the eyes, but more like steam or fog. It wouldn't do to have your own eyes hurting while trying to fight, after all. He considered that Slade had been warned and threw them in the direction of a new burst of maniacal laughter. Quickly getting to his feet, Robin extended the bo-staff and made his way across the room.
There were sounds of gunfire, Slade's controlled, single shots, and the opponent's slightly panicked rounds. Robin hoped none of the bullets would travel his way, as he had no way of knowing were the enemy was. It was rather nerve-wracking…
He bumped into the first opponent almost immediately. He had been hit in the shoulder by Slade, but was still holding a gun, so Robin knocked him out quickly with a blow to the head, without being seen. Next he heard a jingling sound, which only could mean one thing.
"Baby? Where are you, snookums?" a shrill, rather childish, woman's voice called.
Suddenly Slade appeared beside him.
"Who is that?" the man asked, apparently annoyed by the mere sound, but who wouldn't be?
"Harley Quinn. The Joker's girlfriend, or at least she thinks she is, I don't know... As crazy as he is, most of the time…"
"She's got to be." Slade nodded.
"Yeah, I mean, dating a guy who wears makeup is one thing, but one who looks like he applied it in the dark, hanging upside down, while completely drunk? I don't think so." Robin smirked.
"Glad you have taste." Slade responded. "Can you take her?"
"Ewww… wrong choice of words, but yeah." Robin shuddered.
"Good." Slade moved away again.
Robin came across her a moment later, and she didn't see him coming either. She was knocked out mid-coo.
The smoke was thinning quickly now, due to the large hole in the roof. Robin still had a few smoke-bombs, but didn't want to waste them. However, if he was seen, he couldn't fight… As soon as he realized this it, naturally, happened. Two of the Joker's goons suddenly appeared before him. Robin hurriedly put the bo behind his back, shrinking it until it was only as long as his lower arm.
"Hey, isn't this the kid we were supposed to pop?" Goon number one asked Goon number two.
"Not sure. Let's just shoot everything under five feet." Goon number two, apparently a thinker, said, lifting his gun.
"Hey, I'm taller that that!" Robin objected. He then stared at something behind the men's heads. "Batman!" he exclaimed.
Goon number two leered.
"You think we're stupid or someth-"
The dark knight didn't let him finish.
As the men crumpled to the floor after having their heads knocked together, Robin walked up to his mentor.
"Cheater!" he hissed at Bruce. "You should have told me to bring my uniform too!"
"No, that's the point. They will be looking for Bruce and Dick," the man explained hastily in a whisper, "it wouldn't be good if we both were to disappear. Wasn't you supposed to have a body-guard?" he added, a bit louder.
"I'm right here, but I saw you had everything under control." Slade said, coming forwards from the thinning smoke. "Only the maniac left. I'll take Richard here off your hands and start looking for Mr. Wayne."
"Good." Batman nodded, while Robin gave Slade a 'how will you do that?'-look.
The hero was gone just as fast as he had appeared, and Slade led Robin to a place where a lot of guests were either sleeping or moaning slightly.
"Find Bruce." Slade ordered.
Robin stared up at the man.
"Err… Slade?" Was it possible that the man, after all, was an idiot?
"Yes, I know, brat! Just find someone who looks enough like him and make sure his face isn't seen!"
Robin nodded and handed back the bo-staff to the man, he doubted he would need it again. What Slade had suggested would provide a perfect cover, if it worked. As all men were dressed in black tuxedoes, he just had to find someone with a similar build and dark hair. It wasn't difficult, and the man in question was sprawled halfway under a buffet-table as well. Perfect. Robin quickly checked that the man was breathing, and he seemed to be fine, sleeping soundly. There were sounds from a fight coming from the balustrade above the main floor, and as Robin looked up he briefly met the Joker's eyes.
"Bruce! Bruce! he cried, shaking the unknown man. "Wake up! Please! He's going to kill us!"
Slade, in the meanwhile, was reloading his gun, and as the green-haired psycho noticed that he wasn't just facing Batman, but also the man who had taken out most of his men, he was clever enough to call it a day. He grabbed one of the hanging ropes and was pulled up, both laughing and cursing as he went. Robin stared upwards and had time to barely make out a small blimp with a large laughing clown-face painted on it. Yeah. Security would miss that one… Robin was starting to agree with Slade.
Suddenly a lot of people rushed in, the police and the paramedics, followed closely, naturally, by the press. Robin had some photo-flashes go off in his face before Slade pulled him away. No one seemed to notice that the man Robin had been sitting with wasn't, in fact, his guardian, and they didn't have time to, before everyone was carried out on stretchers. Slade and Robin moved outside as well, only to catch up with Bruce who acted groggy, as the medical staff took a look at him.
"I'm in charge of their safety, I'll be taking them home now." Slade declared, and no one dared to object.
"We should keep him around more often…" Bruce muttered to Robin as they walked towards their car as it pulled up to the curb, driven, naturally, by Alfred.
Robin only chuckled.
"The Joker is still out there, and you've paid me to make sure Richard will be safe until he leaves." Slade said decisively. "So I'll stay, providing you want me to, of course." he added the last words almost as sign of generosity, his tone suggesting that the matter was settled already.
"Of course." Bruce said. "And tomorrow I would like to talk to you some more about your security-ideas."
Robin let out a breath, and glanced nervously at Slade, who merely gestured for him to go upstairs.
As they entered the room, Slade threw his jacket off and started unbuttoning his shirt. Robin's nervousness rose to never before experienced levels.
"Err… Slade? What..?"
"You are going to do me a favor… something that I have been looking forward to for quite a long time now…"
"Wh-what?" Robin's voice rose just a little, and his eyes widened as Slade stretched out on his bed.
"You are going to pick the damn glass-shards out of my back." The man said, before glancing back over his shoulder with a smirk. "What else did you expect?"
Ten minutes later found Robin with a pair of tweezers and a bowl, sitting across Slade's backside, carefully jiggling yet another small glass-shard out.
"I told you just to yank it- OUCH!" Slade hissed.
"Don't be a baby…" Robin smirked. "And hey, aren't you supposed to have healing abilities?"
"Yes. Healing abilities doesn't prevent wounds from happening, though…" Slade muttered dryly. "And, as you noticed, if the object isn't pulled out, I tend to heal around- HELL!"
"I yanked!" Robin defended himself.
"You are enjoying this too much." Slade almost seemed to pout. But of course he didn't. Not Slade.
"Well, you enjoyed jerking me around since yesterday morning!" Robin snorted.
"It was quite fun, yes." Slade chuckled. "Not as fun as actually jerking y-OW! That one was stuck to my spine, damnit!"
Robin grinned.
A bit later his fun was over, though.
"That was the last one as far as I can see… But you might want to get an X-ray, your skin has probably healed over a few shards."
"You should be able to feel them." Slade suggested. "I prefer to have as little to do with hospitals as possible, due to my... condition."
"Your wimp-condition?" Robin snickered, but started running his hands over the man's back, gently at first, and then harder.
"Can't feel anything… the clothes must have stopped them from going deeper." he said, after a while.
"Good… will you massage my front now?" The man leered.
"Go massage yourself." Robin suggested and climbed off the man's legs in a huff.
Slade chuckled and rolled over before getting up and heading to the shower.
"Wash my back, then?" he suggested over his should with a smirk, before closing the door.
Robin stood still for a moment, until he heard the water start running. Then he sighed.
"What the hell…" he mumbled, and started to unbutton his shirt.
Slade seemed somewhat surprised when Robin entered, but made no attempt to hide himself. Maybe he was too busy looking at Robin's nude form, maybe he didn't think he had anything to be ashamed of. He was right.
"I'm just here to help you with your back…" Robin muttered, before being pulled into the shower.
Robin felt lightheaded as the first kiss ended.
"Sure you want to do this with the staff?" Slade teased him.
"What staff? This?" Robin closed his hand around Slade's member while smiling mischievously.
"Brat…" the man chuckled.
"Oh, you mean the help." Robin chuckled. "Sorry… my mistake."
"I'm not sure this is in my job description." Slade mumbled, but let his hands roam freely none the less.
"I… think we can fit it in…" Robin panted, feeling like the king of double meanings. "Besides, your contract says you are not to leave my side, right?"
"Yes?" Slade grinned, liking where this was going.
"So, if I wanted to have sex with a very hot man, you would have to be there?" Robin grinned.
"I guess…?" Slade leered.
"Good, then let's just cut out the middle-man… making things more efficient."
"I always thought you were a very bright young man…" Slade chuckled, leaning down to kiss Robin again.
The shower-adventure ended on Robin's bed, which was very surprised to be used for something more than sleeping and the occasional wank. It was a very exiting night for it. And for Robin. They ended up falling asleep at four in the morning, and at breakfast the next day, Robin still looked half dead, although inexplicably happy about it.
Bruce noticed him wince as he moved on his chair.
"Sore?" he asked.
"What?" Robin's head shot up, while Slade seemed to have swallowed his coffee the wrong way.
"Yes? From last night?" Bruce asked.
"Wh-I-we-I…" Robin spluttered his face very pale now.
"You didn't get any of the glass on you, did you?" Bruce was starting to get really worried now.
"Oh. OH! No, no, not at all, Slade protected me." Robin told him, slumping on his chair.
"So you two are on first name basis now?" Bruce smiled. "Just as well, I'm glad you get along. I'd like you to call me Bruce as well, if that is all right?" he asked the other man, who nodded, still coughing now and then.
"I'd… be honored… and of course you may call me Slade as well…" the man said.
"Good, good. I was thinking that if you don't have any prior engagements, would you consider staying here for a week to sort out our security?" the millionaire asked. "I liked quite a few of your ideas last night and I want to know what you can do for us long-term. I'm especially interested in any technology you can recommend."
"Certainly, if would be my pleasure." Slade nodded. "Although it will have to wait until after I escort Richard to the airport."
"Yes, I'm sure you want to go back to your friends, don't you?" Bruce sighed and gave Robin an almost sad look.
"Errr.. actually… I could… maybe… stick around… for a few days or so?" Robin suggested.
"Really? Alfred and I will be very happy to have you." Bruce smiled.
As Robin's eyes darted the Slade, the man mouthed "Me too."
"Great! Oh… I just have to do something…" Robin said, getting up from his chair with another wince.
"What?" Bruce asked.
"I have to find out how to FedEx a waffle iron."
The End.
A/N: Sooo.. not very graphic, but I'm thinking about a PWP-story to balance it up… oh, you can send word-promts for that too if you like… ;)
I really enjoyed Bruce being clueless… AND willing to hire a criminal, but I thought his reasons were rather okay… ;) And I think that was my most random ending yet… ;)