Brittany was sort of glad that she wore a dress that evening. She's not sure that she could handle riding on the back of Santana's bike that night. She hadn't considered that when she dressed that evening. In all of her confused excitement she had forgotten Santana's offer to kill two birds with one stone and give her a ride home on her bike. That turned out to be a blessing, because she honestly needed a little distance between them by the end of the night.
As they watched Kurt and later Mercedes, both of whom were amazing, they enjoyed the meal that Santana insisted on ordering. She had promised Brittany dinner, and despite Sugar's endless appetizers arriving at the table coupled with those knee buckling drinks she intending on keeping her promise, and so she and Brittany ordered a light dinner as they chatted throughout the night. Brittany found that she loved Santana's silly laugh and her wide grin, and Santana put it on display often that night. Brittany wanted to ask about what Dave had said, about how Santana worked hard for her confidence. She had some ideas, based on their conversation at the coffee shop, but she didn't want to come on too strong with the questions. She had already asked quite a few at the coffee shop, and a few more to Dave, and so she thought she would keep her curiosity at bay, lest she have to answer a few questions herself.
The evening was a blast, with Kurt joining them after his set and them cheering Mercedes on to finish off the evening. Afterwards they all sat and chatted, and it did not go unnoticed by Brittany how Santana gave her undivided attention to her. Sure, she greeted friends and well wishers who came to compliment her performance, but any women or men who tried to get her attention for other reasons she politely dismissed as gently as she could. Nikki ended up going home alone that night, as did Sophia. Santana took a brief moment to say goodnight to each woman privately, but it seemed to Brittany it was more to soothe any potentially hurt feelings than for any other reason. Brittany didn't know the deal with those two, and again she didn't want to ask. Still, she would be lying if she said that she wasn't curious.
At the end of the night Santana walked Brittany to the curb and waited with her until her cab arrived. They chatted on the sidewalk, Brittany feeling nervous and awkward for some reason but Santana seeming totally relaxed.
"Hope you had a good time, Ohio."
"I did Santana, thanks so much for inviting me again."
"Anytime. You have to come back and hear the others sing. They really are all talented, although don't tell Berry I said that. I feed her praise like you feed a fish in a fish tank...small, cautious servings. Too much and the environment can become toxic. Her ego may kill you."
Brittany laughed, "You have a really interesting group of friends."
"That I do."
"Well thank you for sharing them with me for the evening."
"Please," Santana smirked. "You class up the joint. "
"You wouldn't have thought that if I rode home on your bike in this dress," Brittany laughed.
"You think the nude model would judge who you flashed your body parts to?" Santana smiled.
Brittany looked at Santana seriously.
"What?" Santana asked, sensing a change in the atmosphere.
"Nothing," Brittany replied.
"Did I say something wrong, Brittany?" Santana asked, closing the space between them and gently touching her bare arm. Brittany shivered at the touch despite the warmth of the night. Instinctively she licked her lips, her eyes falling to Santana's mouth before quickly darting up and meeting confused and concerned eyes. Brittany swallowed hard.
"I'm sorry. No, everything is okay Santana, really, my mind just runs all over the place when I'm tired. Best night I've had since I came to New York, I promise."
Santana smiled brightly. "Good. It makes me very happy to hear that, and you should come back. Spread the word, but not to that landing strip guy."
Brittany laughed, "You know, he said he's a musician. Let's just hope he never finds this place."
"Let's hope not, Ohio."
Just then Brittany's cab pulled up. Santana leaned in for a hug and Brittany took the opportunity to breathe her in.
"Good night, Ohio," Santana said, pulling open the car door for her.
"Good night Santana," Brittany smiled. She climbed into the back seat and Santana shut the door, smiling at her until the driver drove off. Then she went back inside to rejoin her friends who had been waiting all night to get her alone.
As the club closed for the evening and the patrons were ushered out, Santana rejoined Dave, Kurt, Sam and Mercedes at their table. Sugar and Quinn decided that would be a good time to take a beak and join their friends.
"Okay Santana, spill."
"What are you talking about Quinn?"
"The new blonde. Brittany. I thought you said Brittanys were trouble."
"Yup, sure did."
"And yet you spend the whole night entertaining a Brittany without a second thought?"
"She's my friend."
"You two looked real friendly when you were singing to her, Santana." Sugar chimed in.
"I sang to a ton of people tonight."
"And she was staring at you longingly," Sugar said with a mischievous smile on her face.
"Everyone stares at me like that after two of your drinks." Santana quipped.
"She has a point," Kurt chimed in.
"She's straight and we're just friends. Can't a girl have a friend anymore?"
"Oh hell no," Mercedes spoke up.
"What is it Weezy?" Santana replied, rolling her eyes.
"We don't need another Sophia on our hands Santana."' Quinn jumped in.
"She's not another Sophia."
"Maybe Sophia and Brittany can have a brawl to the death for Santana. I can come up with a signature drink for the event" Sugar added, and Santana thinks she's being totally serious.
"There will be no brawl, because Brittany is team penis, as disgusting as that is."
"Santana," Quinn stated seriously, "be careful, okay? Sophia can't get over you even though it was supposed to be just fun. We all saw you and Brittany together. You're flirtatious, and no matter how many times everyone might tell Brittany that's just how you are she may lose sight of that. I know you say she's straight but that doesn't mean she's not up to try a little something new."
Santana sighed. "Listen, I just met her but I enjoy her company, and she hasn't made a lot of friends since moving here from Ohio. I can also tell that she's going through some things and could use a friend, and as you all know I've gone through some things. I like her. She doesn't back down from anyone and she does it so nicely you can't even get mad at it. Dave told me how she handled Sophia and Quinn tonight. Plus she's an awesome painter. She intrigues me. I'm not trying to sleep with her."
"I saw you looking at her ass," Sam said.
"Hey, I'm still me," Santana shrugged.
All of her friends either laughed, smirked or rolled their eyes at that statement.
"Yeah, well I remember Sophia being straight and wanting to be 'just your friend'. Look at how that turned out." Quinn reminded.
"It didn't turn out that bad." Santana replied.
"She stalks you." Quinn said and most of the group either shook their heads or showed some level of agreement on their face.
"She doesn't stalk me," Santana huffed. "She's just clingy as hell. She's harmless."
"Yeah well it was you who vowed that you weren't going to be another girl's gay awakening," Mercedes added.
"And from what I saw tonight Brittany looks like she's waking up, Santana" Sam added.
"Et tu, Samuel?"
"You know I don't speak Spanish, Santana."
Santana just rolled her eyes and sighed deeply. Kurt suppressed a chuckle.
"And I won't be her gay awakening come true so everybody calm down. Even if she decides she wants to cross a line I'm not crossing it with her. I know everybody isn't like Sophia but I have no desire to hurt this girl. I can't help if a woman is attracted to me, but I have no plans on being their first taste of the rainbow anymore. It can get complicated when they expect it to turn into some grand love story when you try and make it clear before anything happens that it isn't going to be a love story, ever. They get blinded by the thought of the fantasy coming true. Nope, I don't feel like being another woman's first dip in the lady pond. Sophia did teach me that much."
"And yet you keep finding new and curious friends."
"Who said she was curious?"
Everybody at the table raised their hands.
"Oh for fuck's sake," Santana scoffed. "I'm not going to avoid friendships because a woman may have a moment where she wants to get up on this. If that happens I won't act on it and it will pass. It's simple."
"Santana, from one gay to another, you're trying to tell me that you don't detect a whiff of the gay on that girl?" Kurt asked.
"Nope," Santana lied. "And my gaydar is impeccable."
"But..." Dave started.
"Callate Dave," Santana said and Kurt smiled.
"Dave told me..."
"Of course he did." Santana rolled her eyes. "He loses his mind the minute you plant those lady lips on him."
"Dave told me that he saw that look in your eye when you saw her in the coffee shop."
"What look Porcelain? These are the same damn eyes I carry around all day. What are you and that big oaf talking about when you should be at home singing him Judy Garland tunes and feeding him slabs of meat while he moves your furniture around for fun?"
"You're attracted to her Santana." Kurt finished.
"She's hot, but I don't fuck every hot girl that I meet."
"You try," Quinn quipped.
"Hater. And no I don't. My vagina is discerning. I like to flirt. I flirt, okay? It's like sharpening my knives. Just keeping my tools in pristine condition. Anyway, I don't need a damn intervention. Enough about me. Pick another topic."
The table went silent for a moment as they gauged Santana's mood.
They all decided that it would indeed be wise to pick another topic.
The ride home for Brittany wasn't long enough. She just wishes she could drive, drive for hours and think. She had such a good time and she really doesn't want the night to end. Santana is so much fun and she's so sweet. Brittany has to admit that she even enjoys how flirtatious the girl is, even though she knows that she's not gay. She's very attentive and even though she had beautiful women flirting with her she kept her attention focused primarily on Brittany. Brittany thought that was nice of her since she had invited her and she didn't really know anyone else there. She wanted to make sure she was comfortable. She could see how women would like that about her. It made a difference to her and she's not even into women.
She liked Santana's dry wit. She liked the tough girl exterior but she could tell there was a much softer side that she only allowed a chosen few to see. Brittany could tell she was a pretty good dancer, too. Well, she didn't really get to see any real moves but she could see that she looked good when she danced. Then again she always looks good.
People did seem rather protective of her, though. Brittany wonders if it's because of the sex tape and former eating disorder thing or was it something else. They seem like a tight knit group, like a family, like she had with her friends back in Ohio. Her friend Mike and his girlfriend Tina. Her friend Artie and his girlfriend Kitty. Marley and Ryder. Her and...
Forget about them, that place, where mistakes follow you like a shadow. Everybody knows everybody and so everybody knows your business.
All of this would seem silly to Santana, like it was nothing. She has learned the tricks of the universe, how not to give a shit as she says. Brittany doesn't know how to do that. She's always given a shit. She gives a shit about everything.
Brittany climbed out of the cab and made her way up the steps to her apartment building. As soon as the elevator reached her floor she felt like she couldn't hold back the need to rest any longer. She walked to her door and unlocked it, dropping her bag down on the small table and her keys in the drawer of the table by the door before kicking off her shoes and heading straight for the couch. She grabbed the remote control and turned on the tv. She figured she would wind down by watching some mindless tv before getting ready for bed.
She hopes she dreams about the night she just had.
Brittany woke up an hour later in her own bed. Somehow she had managed to remove her dress and her bra and make it to her bed wearing just her panties. She had taken it easy all night on Sugar's drinks, but as the night came close to an end and Brittany witnessed Nikki pull Santana in for a soft kiss on the lips she all of a sudden wanted that drink. It was chaste and yet it felt intimate, as if nobody was supposed to see as they stood in the darkened exit of the door and Nikki pulled Santana in swiftly by the waist. The way her hand lingered on her ass. The way she touched her even as Santana would not allow the kiss to deepen. They spoke that way for a second, for the longest second of Brittany's life, before Brittany tried to pretend that she was paying attention to the conversation taking place at the table. Instead, something in her reached for the glass, and she would have downed it in one shot but for the fear that someone would see her and think that something was bothering her. It wasn't. She just all of a sudden felt awkward is all. She's never really had friends that were lesbians before. She's seen her teammates make out, drunken celebrations after a big win, but nothing more than sloppy girls kissing mostly because the guys thought it was hot. She's never seen this between women, intimacy, not in person. This was real and she doesn't understand what it made her feel.
All she understands is whatever it was it was probably because of Santana, and that scares her.
She didn't want to be the first one to reach out after last night, but Santana had reached out with the invite the day before. The least she could do was text her another thank you to let her know she made it home alright, and so as not to seem overbearing she waited until late in the afternoon to text her.
Santana was at the gym when the notification came in. After the previous night she just wanted to be alone and so she slept late before getting up and treating herself to a nice brunch. She did things like that sometimes, going out to dinner or movies alone and enjoying space away from everyone. She did that to remove their voices from her head sometimes. She knows that her friends love her, but she learned when she was going through her hardest times that you have to be discerning, to separate the thoughts and feelings of others about your life and your decisions from your own, even if they have your best interests at heart. She will consider what they have to say, but nothing anyone has to say will ever define her. Her thoughts and opinions on a matter will always be the final decision on the matter, and win or lose she will stand by those decisions and not let anyone reprimand her for them.
But she understands their concerns. When she first stopped to talk to Brittany in the coffee shop she was attracted to her and thought that she might be into women. The way they caught one another's eyes in the classroom and the way Brittany instantly jumped in when that landing strip guy was being obnoxious, she totally thought this girl was at the very least bi but she guesses she is wrong. Maybe she's just a flirt just like Santana is, but Santana doesn't get that vibe from her. She suspects that her friends may be right, she has suspected it since the coffee shop. Brittany may not be a lesbian, or bi, but Santana is pretty sure she's curious. Old Santana may have been willing to scratch that itch for her. Santana after Sophia knows better.
Sophia is not a problem, per se. She's just a woman looking for love with no idea how to find someone to give her heart to. Santana and Sophia met at the birthday party of a mutual friend. They became friendly and then one day that mutual friend brought a few friends to the club to see Santana perform. It was in that moment that things changed. That night Santana sang and danced and flirted and Santana went from someone that Sophia simply had a crush on to someone that she simply had to have. It took a little time but it happened.
Sophia was the straight friend who always had one or two lesbian friends. Curious but never exploring for herself, living vicariously through the vagina on vagina tales of her lesbian friends. She had made it through high school and college and still hadn't taken the leap, always claiming she wasn't gay and absolutely loved men, and yet something about Santana made her want to give women a try. Santana was hesitant, even though the girl is gorgeous, but the more they hung out together the closer it came to happening. Sadly, the first time it did happen Santana was pretty tipsy and she regrets that, however, she must not have been drunk enough to be completely terrible because Sophia kept hitting her up for round two in the days after. Santana remembers enough of the experience to know that she should have put on the brakes when she had the chance. Sophia was checking off all of her stereotypical "I'm about to hook up with a girl for real OMG" boxes that Santana usually works very hard to avoid, including literally saying "Oh my gosh it's really about to happen" as Santana stuck her hand in her panties. Sober Santana would have taken her fingers and run right then and there but drunk Santana is a horn dog and decided to pretend that she was hearing the thoughts inside of this girl's head and that she hadn't actually spoken the words. She had, and it was cringey as fuck, but horny Santana was only focused on getting off. It was her own fault. Sophia was always trying to make out with her and hinting about never having kissed a girl and how perfect her lips were and Santana always managed to maneuver herself out of the situation. That was until she had taken 3 straight body shots off of a beautiful girl she had once had a fling with and had to remove herself from that equation because she knew that she never wanted to shit in that diaper again. Therefore, always ready Sophia's lips would have to do. When Sophia cornered her when she came out of the bathroom after drinking down some water and trying to compose herself Santana and her damn flirty ways took over. She spun the girl around and pinned her against the wall next to the bathroom.
"Are you following me?" she slurred, her lips close to Sophia's ear.
"No," Sophia lied, swallowing hard.
"So I guess you want me to back up and let you go then," Santana replied, taking a slow step backwards.
"I didn't say that either," Sophia said, wrapping her arms around Santana's neck.
"What do you want from me Sophia?" Santana asked, her head slightly spinning.
"I..."
"I'm not looking for a girlfriend, Sophia. Is it because I sang to you? I sing to a lot of girls. I flirt with a lot of girls, Sophia, and that won't stop any time soon. I don't want a girlfriend, not by a longshot. I don't need another fuck buddy. I have my share of those. I just want to have fun Sophia, I'm sure our friends have warned you already. If not, I'm warning you now. I play, and I play hard. I'm really not in the mood to usher you into this new phase of your life. Good luck with that, though." Santana said, before stepping back again and turning to leave.
"I...it's okay Santana. I just wanted to kiss you, that's all." Sophia said, pulling her back in.
"That's sweet. Look, kissing a girl like me, on a night like tonight, it won't end well for either of us. When I'm like this, a make out session isn't exactly what I'm looking for. You need somebody your own speed, doll. I don't need somebody following me around with rainbow hearts in their eyes. I'm not that girl."
"I wouldn't mind more than a kiss, Santana."
"You can't handle more than a kiss."
"I'm not a virgin, Santana, I just haven't been with a woman."
Santana sighed, "Sophia, let's just talk about this another time, okay? I'm really not in the mood to be your teacher tonight, or deal with your awkward regrets in the morning."
Sophia leaned in and brought her lips together with Santana's.
"I'm not a child, Santana. You're the one complicating things, and I promise there will be no awkward regrets."
Sophia kissed Santana again, pulling her into a nearby bedroom.
"Natasha is going to kill us if I fuck you in her house."
"Natasha is the one who sent me up here to check on you," Sophia smirked. "She just said keep it in the guest room."
"So I guess this must be the guest room, then?"
Sophia smiled and locked the door behind her, and Santana remembers touching Sophia until she cried out so loudly she kissed her to muffle the noise. Then she fell asleep before Sophia even returned the favor.
She fucking hates when that happens. That's why she doesn't drink often.
Well that's not the only reason, but still.
So what happens after that night? Sophia spends the next few times they saw each other sending secret smiles and stolen glances, basically exposing to the entire world that they had done the deed. Which was okay with Santana, because she had nothing to hide, but still, that was their business.
It was a week later when she asked Santana to lunch. Santana didn't want to complicate things so she met up with her. She wanted to see where her head was, if she was okay after what had happened. She seemed okay, which made Santana feel much better about what happened. They ended the lunch with a hug and a promise to have dinner one night soon.
About a week after that she casually showed up to see Santana perform. No big deal, sometimes her friends did that. As a matter of fact she usually had one friend or another show up to see her, usually with at least one other person. Sophia showed up alone, sat right near the front of the stage, but she played it cool. The googly eyes were gone after the first week or so. She smiled and cheered and Santana danced and sang and worked the crowd and like she does with many of her friends she acknowledged her presence while performing. It felt like normal between them.
After her set she went and greeted the people she knew in the audience just as she usually did. Sophia was alone and Kurt had a rare night off and so he and Dave had a date night. Since Santana was alone she decided to join Sophia to enjoy the rest of the show. What happened later that night she can't blame on the demon juice this time. She gave Sophia a ride home on her bike, Sophia invited her upstairs, and a kiss turned into a hookup. Once again Santana made it clear beforehand that she wasn't looking for anything more and once again Sophia assured her that she was okay with that. Santana really should have followed her gut.
Sophia began calling Santana to chat more than she did before they hooked up, which Santana dealt with, because she certainly didn't want to ghost the girl. Still, she didn't answer every call. She also didn't go out with her without the rest of their friends present. She decided that the last time was indeed the last time. It was nice, but it was clear this girl was crushing on her, and she really didn't need that shit.
Well Sophia was determined to get Santana alone. If she wasn't going to accept any movie or meal opportunities with her then she would create some opportunities. She began showing up for every performance, and while Santana was kind to her she didn't sit to eat with her anymore. She would find someone else to sit with or catch the rest of the show at the bar with Sugar when she had no one else to sit with. It didn't deter Sophia. It just started getting weirder.
She announced at a dinner that all of the friends were at that she was officially a lesbian now. Everyone happily welcomed her to club rainbow. Santana didn't see the need for an official announcement but whatever floats your boat. Then she did the "I'm a new gay thing" and went out and purchased everything with a rainbow on it. Rainbow t-shirt, rainbow belts, a fucking rainbow umbrella. Santana realized at that moment if she ever decided to go into business she would make a killing marketing to baby gays. Then she announced how she needed all of her girls to take her out to the club so they could celebrate by helping her find some lady loving, as if she hadn't been to lesbian clubs a million times before with them.
Santana gets it. It's a confusing time no matter how you find your way to the rainbow. If it only took her two finger bangings to get her to commit to team pink well good for her. Every journey doesn't have to be angsty and involve at least one of your family members being in complete denial that it's not just a phase. So if she wants to go out and celebrate by finding someone to go down on her by all means knock yourself out, because Santana generally saves that for people she's serious about.
It turns out she was hoping to get some sort of rejection to the idea from Santana. She was hoping that Santana would feel just a ping of jealousy. It wasn't going to happen. As a matter of fact Santana was rooting for the woman to find some love in the club.
Well she didn't, because it turns out none of them were Santana, which she admitted to Natasha, who of course told Santana, who of course cringed at the revelation. Still, they shared a friend group, and Santana would treat her like a friend until it all passed. Sophia is gorgeous, she should have no problem finding a woman, it just hasn't happened yet. Sophia won't let it happen.
It only got worse. She joined the same gym as Santana. Then she ran into her at the market. She happened to be in the neighborhood and rang Santana's doorbell a couple of times. When Santana made it clear that she didn't like people dropping by her place she came to the club. She came to every single performance Santana had at the club. Sometimes some of their other friends would join her but if not she would just show up alone. Santana always greeted her, would even chat for a second, but never joined her. She had sympathy for the woman. She knew given time she would find herself and stop imprinting herself to Santana like some baby chick. She would give her time, and everything would be okay.
Well maybe, Santana decided, she could help her along. Which led to mistake number 2...Nikki.
It went on for three months, three months of Sophia being everywhere. Santana doesn't know why she's been so patient and sympathetic. Like she told her friends, Sophia is harmless, and when she told her to back off and not come to her house she hasn't done that again. She also was clear to her that she enjoys working out alone so if they run into one another at the gym to agree to just greet one another and then go on about their day. Sophia has stuck to the rules, even if she does look at her like a lost puppy sometimes.
Which was why after a month of Nikki flirting with Santana at the gym she invited Nikki to hear her sing. Sophia knew that Nikki would always approach Santana at the gym, they would chat a moment, and Santana would send her on her way. Santana wasn't lying when she said that she doesn't like to be bothered when she works out. Plus, Nikkis were a toss up and this Nikki looked like trouble, which she didn't need when she already had a Sophia on her back. Santana flirted relentlessly with Nikki when she came by to hear her sing, and Nikki instantly knew she wanted her and was going to have her when she saw her perform. She was hoping to break the spell Sophia was under but instead she found herself a new fuck buddy, which was exactly what she wasn't looking for.
But holy cow was Nikki a great fuck buddy, and she spent good money when she came to see Santana perform. She tips well and she brings business clients in with her and they spend even better. She brings friends who spend money and she tips the waitresses well. She even comes in when Santana is waitressing when she has a deal to close and she makes sure she is seated in Santana's section. She will leave an obscene tip and they don't overwork her for it. Then she will invite Santana over after work and they will share dessert. Sometimes she will sit and wait for her as they close up, nursing a drink she paid too much for just so she can take Santana home with her and relax her after a hard days work. Nikki really is an awesome fuck buddy to have, from the outside looking in.
She wants to treat Santana like a kept woman. They both agree they don't want a relationship, and yet she doesn't want Santana to see other women. Meanwhile, Santana doesn't know what else Nikki is doing but she highly doubts that she is her only fuck buddy. In fact Santana knows it by the way her phone blows up some nights when they are together. Santana could care less. She's there for the stellar sex and that's it. Still, when Nikki sees Santana flirt too much with a woman that she knows Santana wouldn't mind spending the night with she gets angry. When she saw Santana with another woman on the back of her bike she became upset. When she saw Santana kiss a woman goodnight outside of the club she was pissed. Santana told Nikki that it's starting to feel a lot like a relationship, a relationship where she is the only one who was expected to follow rules. But Nikki is persistent, and Nikki is used to having her way. As much as Santana enjoyed the sex it's not worth the headache in her opinion, and so she avoids spending the night with Nikki these days.
Except for the last time she got tipsy and left with her, and the sex that night was insane. Still, Santana knew she needed to end it for her own peace of mind.
Santana doesn't do relationships for now because apparently she's attracted to crazy women. Every woman she's ever had more than a friends with benefits situation with has turned out to be certifiably insane. So eventually she will try it again, but for now it's easier to get rid of crazy friends with benefits than it is to get rid of a crazy ex.
That was until she slept with Sophia, who is still hanging around 7 months later but is harmless.
And Nikki, but that's what she gets for taking a chance on a Nikki.
Now she has a Brittany in her midst, but she's trying to avoid her third strike right now.
Nothing is going to happen with Brittany, even if she is curious.
Curious and insanely hot.
Brittany totally wasn't bothered that Santana took almost 2 hours to respond to her text. Her chest totally didn't tighten just a little and she certainly didn't check the phone volume twice to see if there was a reason why she wasn't getting an alert. Finally Santana text her and let her know that she had just seen it because she was in the gym and she leaves her phone in her locker while she works out. She told her she was welcome to come anytime, and that she still owed her a ride on her bike. Brittany replied with a winking emoji and that was the end of that. They didn't reach out to one another for 2 more days.
It was Santana who gave Brittany a call.
"Hey Ohio, are you ready for that ride?"
"What did you have in mind?"
"Next weekend, if you're available, my riding club is having a fundraiser for Autism Awareness. We're riding out to Albany as a show of support for people with autism and their families who need more government funding for additional services."
"That sounds great, Santana."
"Yeah, it's part of the reason I love belonging to a club. It's a family. You'll get to see that if you tag along. We ride out and then when the mission is over we meet up with other clubs, hit the bar, stay overnight in a hotel and ride out the next afternoon for home. You interested?"
"I am, but I've never been on the back of a bike. That's a pretty long ride for a first timer."
"Which is why I called you now. There is a learning curve to riding on the back of a bike. Why don't I take you out on my dad's bike this weekend, let you get a feel for her. I'll drive you at the pace we usually ride up there at and you tell me if you think you can handle it. If not, I understand. Just thought you might like it."
"Why your dad's bike? Did something happen to yours?"
"No. My bike is great for one person and ok for riding two up on a short ride. For a road trip with an overnight bag not so much. My dad rides a hog with a nice, cushy passenger seat and back rest. Speaking of that, if you decide to tag along I need to show you how to pack as well."
"That sounds like a good idea. I really would like to go, but I fear I may not be the best passenger if I'm squeezing the life out of you all the way up there."
Santana laughed, "Half of the reason I bought that bike is so women could hold on tight."
"So you're an evil genius, then?"
"Just a genius, doll."
"Okay. I have a cooking class Saturday morning. Do you think we can meet at noon? Then afterwards if you're hungry you can taste my latest creation."
Santana had to bite her tongue before replying to that one.
"Sure, sounds great."
"Okay then, I'll see you on Saturday. I'll text you my address."
"Great, see you then, Ohio."
"See you then, New York."
Brittany hung up the phone with a smile on her face. She sat on her couch and noticed the warm feeling in her chest. She didn't know why talking to Santana made her feel this way. Maybe it was finally making a new friend in New York. Maybe it was doing new and exciting things like going to hear people sing and riding on the back of motorcycles. Brittany didn't know what this feeling was, she only knew that it felt good.
The week seemed to move so slow. Brittany had her art and cooking classes and work. Santana had work and modeling and figuring out if she should rent Brittany a separate room for the ride or just share a double. She doesn't even now why she's asking herself that question. If it were any of her other friends other than Sophia she would simply rent a double and let her usual bunkmate know that she would be bringing a guest and so she should arrange to bunk with one of the ladies who was riding solo. Maybe she would just ask Brittany what she wanted to do. They get a good rate on the rooms and so she would treat if they shared a room, or pay half if she decided to room alone. She thought that would be a fair proposition.
When Saturday finally arrived Santana went to pick up her father's bike. They chatted for a short while and shared some coffee before she left. She and her dad hadn't always had the best of relationships. Her father couldn't keep it in his pants so her parents argued a lot before they finally gave up and divorced. Santana spent a lot of time being shuttled back and forth between the two of them, that is, whenever her father didn't stand her up for the weekend because some woman was in his bed.
Santana had some very rebellious teen years before finally coming to terms with her sexuality. She came out to her cousin first, her mother's niece. She and Nani are close to this day, and Nani already suspected that Santana was gay. She was really supportive and convinced her to come out to her mom and their grandmother. Santana was relieved and surprised that they didn't give her a hard time. Sure, her mom asked her if she was sure and suggested maybe it was a phase and told her she didn't have to decide right then and put herself into a box but she didn't have a hard time out of her. Her grandmother, being an activist and all, was ready to grab a rainbow flag and go to a Pride parade with her. Santana had to tell her that she wasn't there yet but she promised to let her know when that would happen.
After Santana promised her mother that she would somehow make her a grandmother one day her mother came to terms with it. Surprisingly, it was her father who gave her hell.
Her paternal grandmother accepted her. She had always had a soft spot for Santana, but even more so when her parents divorced. She knew that her son was not the best father and it was like she overcompensated for that by loving on Santana even more. So when he disapproved of her loving women it was easier than she thought it would be to cut him out of her life. She figured he probably wanted all of the women on the planet for himself. They didn't speak for almost three years, at least not without fighting. Santana was 17 when she came out. She was 19 when she tired of arguing with her father and cut him out of her life. They didn't speak a single word to one another after that for over a year. Then her grandmother died and he knew how close they were, and so he came to the funeral and extended an olive branch. Santana has a feeling that his mother put a fire under his ass to make things right before she herself died. They needed to find a way to bond. Riding together on the weekends became that bond.
He still has a hard time with her sexuality, but he doesn't give her a hard time about it. Slowly, he's coming to terms, and slowly, Santana is beginning to see him as a father again. They hadn't ever really talked about it, it's like they just called a truce, but Santana knows that one day they will each have their say, once their relationship is stronger.
By the time Saturday rolled around both women felt a rush of excitement. Santana loved introducing people to riding, and she had the feeling that Brittany would grow to love it. There was something so freeing about it, and she had the feeling that there was something Brittany was begging to be freed from.
Santana pulled up in front of the address that Brittany had given her and pulled out her cell phone. She called Brittany and let her know that she was downstairs.
Santana waited for about five minutes, pulling out the things she had brought along for Brittany's ride. When she saw someone exiting the building from the corner of her eye she looked up and held her breath.
"Shit" she thought.
Brittany had on a pair of tight blue jeans, and a black t shirt with an eagle on it. She had on a short leather jacket and a pair of simple black high top sneakers. She had on a pair of shades and her blonde hair was down. Santana cleared her throat and quickly composed herself.
"Looking good Ohio. Are you ready to ride?"
"As ready as I'll ever be." Brittany replied, coming over and greeting Santana with a hug.
"That's not true. You will be a pro by the time I finish with you today. First of all, I'm a safety girl, and while leather is ok for protecting you against abrasions I brought along one of my jackets for you to wear. It has built in body armor. It protects your shoulders, elbows, arms, and your back. It has a spine protector in it. I also brought you some gloves with armor in them, and of course a helmet. So put your jacket in the bag here and put these things on."
Brittany began to do as she was told. She noticed how serious Santana was and realized that this was a real safety lesson for both of them. Santana wanted to be sure she would be a good passenger.
"I also have some external guards for your legs and shins, but I will leave you the option of using those on the longer road trip. I haven't wiped out on a bike since I've learned to ride and I have no intention of doing so now."
"That's good to know."
"Also, I brought you a pair of shades. These are polarized. They're great for riding, and they look good, too."
"Thanks"
"If you find that you like to ride I'll help you find some good boots too. Like I said I'm a safety girl."
"I appreciate that."
"Great, now that you're all suited up...here, let me help you get that helmet tightened correctly...there you go." Santana said, interrupting herself to make sure that Brittany had her gear secured correctly before continuing. "Now, as you can see this bike is built for luxury not speed but it can give you some good speed if you wanted it to. Harleys are classics. This thing has gps, am/fm radio, bluetooth capabilities and our helmets are bluetooth as well, but we won't need all those things today. So, are you ready to climb on?"
"Yes"
"Good, these are the spots to avoid that can get hot on a bike, but you won't have much of a concern about that while riding this bike. Now once I jump on put your foot right there and like I said this bike is built for luxury, so just lean back in the seat and rest your feet on the floor boards."
Santana waited until Brittany was able to hop behind her. She instantly felt Brittany's hands around her waist and swallowed hard.
"Now you can hold my hips or waist, whichever feels more natural to you. This isn't like my bike so you can hold on without crowding me if you want, but feel free to hold on however you are most comfortable."
"I like it like this" Brittany replied.
"So do I" Santana thought. "Okay, great. Now this is the tricky part, some people are tempted to lean into the turns. Don't do that, let the bike do the work and let me do the driving. You just hold on and relax. You can rest your chin on my shoulder through the turns if you like, that way your body will know which way mine is shifting and respond naturally. You'll get the hang of it."
"OK"
"There's an intercom in the helmet so you can hear me speak. I'll try and warn you about things like bumps, stops, and turns. For a bump shift all of your weight to your legs and finally, keep your feet on the floorboards even when I come to a complete stop. It sounds like a lot, but I'm excellent at driving two up and I'll be doing all of the work don't worry, okay."
"Okay"
Well enough of the tutorial. Wait until I turn this on. There is nothing like a Harley rumble. You're gonna feel that shit through your whole body."
Santana turned on the bike and it purred and roared. Brittany instantly understood what Santana was talking about.
"Damn. Shit is so sexy. If the old man wants to ever make up for being an asshole for most of my life this bike would be a good start."
Brittany smiled, and stored away yet another nugget of new information about the woman. Something is amiss in her relationship with her father, but they are close enough for her to borrow his bike.
Brittany held on tight as they pulled off slowly, and Santana couldn't help but grin. She loves the feeling of a woman grabbing her waist as a bike roars beneath them.
"How're you doing back there, Ohio?" Santana said softly, wanting her to get used to the sound of her voice in the helmet.
"I'm good," she replied smiling, and it was true. She wasn't afraid the way that she thought that she would be. She must admit she could see why Santana enjoyed riding her bike. Maybe not riding a bike like Santana owns, where she's leaning forwards and going fast and the seat sits so high and seems so small for two people, but something like this, cruising, she could get used to.
She kept her on local streets for a while, letting her get accustomed to the feel before they hit the West Side Highway, heading slowly uptown towards the Riverdale section of the Bronx. Santana loved the views up there, and she wanted to give her a taste of highway driving. She ended up driving her around Riverdale and then over to the Cloisters, stopping to rest outside for a moment.
"Wanna stretch for a minute?"
"Sure"
"You get off first," Santana said.
Brittany gingerly got off the bike and Santana smiled softly. She hopped of next, removing her helmet and helping Brittany out of hers.
"How do you like it so far?"
"I love it."
"So you think you'd be interested in next Saturday? It's about a 2 and a half hour ride. You just rode for about 90 minutes without an issue."
"It's been that long already?"
"Yup"
"I think I can handle next Saturday."
"Great, and we can stop for breaks whenever you want. The group usually stops for at least one break on the way up anyway."
"Sounds good."
"Have you ever been here before?" Santana asked, referring to the place they had stopped in front of.
"No, no I haven't."
"You should come with me one day. Your artistic eye will love it. It's filled with medieval art and architecture. It's really a beautiful and fascinating place."
"You're just a regular NYC history buff aren't you?"
"Nah, when I first started riding I would find places to ride to and I found myself exploring more of New York because of that. I would ride up into Bear Mountain and along the Hudson River. I found some beautiful parks and interesting locations. It's how I found my tranquility away from home."
"That sounds wonderful."
"It is. People think I'm a social butterfly and a part of me really is. There's also a part of me that equally enjoys being alone."
"I can understand that."
"So, are you ready to head back home? I'm starting to get a little hungry. I saved my appetite because somebody promised me a nice meal."
"Yes somebody did."
"So shall we, me lady?" Santana asked, waving her hand flamboyantly towards the motorcycle.
"Yes we shall," Brittany smiled, as Santana held out her hand and helped her aboard the bike. She made sure Brittany's helmet was secure before pulling off.
They rode comfortably back to Brittany's apartment, where Santana parked the bike and secured the gear before following Brittany inside, carrying her leather jacket for her. She held the door open as Brittany led her to the elevator. Once off she followed her to the door and was invited inside.
The apartment was neat, and far more spacious that Santana thought it would be. The walls were covered in beautiful paintings but no family photos. There were no photos of Brittany either, just a rather solemn but beautiful self portrait. It had a dark background which made her pale skin and blonde hair stand out even more. Her blue eyes were looking down at a kitten she was gently holding.
"Wow Brittany, these paintings are amazing."
"Thank you,"
"I love this one of you. It's beautiful, but it feels so sad for some reason."
"I was pretty sad when I painted it. That's my fur baby, Lord Tubbington. He died right before I moved here. I had him since he was 2 weeks old. We grew up together. Of course I wasn't as old as I am in that painting when I got him but it was how I was remembering him at the time I painted this, as if he were somewhere healthy and new, about to start the first of his nine lives all over again with someone who will love him in his next life the way that I loved him. He went from being this tiny little thing to the fattest cat on the planet. Would it be sad if I admitted that the best friend I ever had was a cat?"
"Of course it wouldn't. I'm sorry for your loss."
"You said it yourself, the saddest part of life is death, and yet, it's inevitable."
"Yes it is."
"Well, get comfortable and have a seat. the remote to the tv is right there."
"Mind if I use your restroom, knock the dirt off my hands before we eat?"
"Of course not, I plan to do the same."
"Also, you can put on some music if you like. I'm more of a music person than a tv person."
"Will do, any requests?"
"Whatever you like, Ohio."
"Great. The bathroom is right down that hall, last door on your right."
"Thanks." Santana said, making her way to the rest room.
Once the women freshened up and Brittany put on some low music Santana sat at the dining room table and watched as Brittany moved about the kitchen plating her dish from earlier that day. She served a baked chicken with risotto and grilled vegetables. Santana raved about the dish and was treated to a strawberry shortcake dessert.
"Oh my goodness Britts, that was amazing."
"Hope it was a fitting thank you for not only today but for inviting me to hear you sing. I still can't get over it."
Santana smiled softly.
"I love your place, and I love that you have all of this artwork you created here."
"Speaking of artwork, wait here," Brittany said.
Brittany stood and retreated to a closet in the hall. When she returned she was carrying a painting.
"This is for you. You loved it so much and it brought me a new friend, I thought maybe you would like to have it."
"Stop playing with me, Britts!"
"No, I want you to have it."
"It's too much," Santana said.
"No, I know how much you love it, and it's not like I can hang a naked picture of you on my own wall."
"Whatever floats your boat, doll," Santana flirted.
"Keep it up and I'm going to sell it to landing strip. He offered me a good price."
"Oh hell no."
"So it's yours. I know you can't take it home on your bike but you can stop by anytime and grab it."
"Thank you Britts, it means a lot to me, I promise."
"You are very welcome, Santana."
The two chatted effortlessly for about an hour before Santana said she had to go. She had to work in a couple of hours and she wanted time to return her father's bike and grab her own. Both women secretly hated that their time had to come to an end, but at least they had next weekend to look forward to.
"Hey, about next weekend," Santana started. "It's one night, and you saw the storage area on the bike, so just bring the bare necessities."
"You got it, captain." Brittany saluted and Santana smiled.
"Also, umm, it's an overnight trip. Usually I will share a room with one of the other riders who is flying solo but if you want to share a double with me that would be my treat. I can also book you a room alone. Would pay for half of the room if you decide to go that route. It wouldn't be a problem."
"Santana, thanks, but I could pay for my own room, but if you don't mind the company I don't mind sharing."
"I rather enjoy the company," Santana winked. Ugh, she just can't help herself, she thought.
Brittany laughed. "Ok then it's settled. I will pack very light and I hope you don't snore."
"Never had any complaints before," Santana smiled.
"Great. So you have a good night at work."
"Thanks, and if you get bored, stop by anytime. I'm not performing tonight but your other bestie Quinn is. So is Berry. It'll be a good show."
"Thanks, I'll keep that in mind."
"Take it easy, Ohio."
"Have a great day, Santana."
Brittany wanted to go to the club that night, but she also didn't want to abuse her welcome. She was happy to have an actual friend and exciting new things to do, and she didn't want to burn her new friend out be hanging around all of the time. Instead she would get ahead of her work as planned, so that she can truly enjoy next weekend.
The week went by quicker than Brittany expected it to, and Brittany managed to keep her distance even though she really wanted to go and see Santana perform again. The last thing she wanted was to come across as one of her fangirls. Last thing she wanted to see was another goodnight kiss between Nikki and Santana.
Brittany knows that she's crushing on Santana a bit. She only admitted that to herself 2 days ago. Just like recently she's been thinking about how she has found girls attractive in the past. She just never allowed herself to entertain the thought. It wasn't like those other girls on her cheerleading squad where it was this big game to be edgy. She has had a real desire to be with a woman before. Not one in particular, but it's been a fantasy.
But not in her family. Not with her mother. Her mother is just so closed minded and judgmental. The only thing worse to her than being gay is being bisexual, because "then you like everything, they're just greedy and confused people."
But she's not greedy and confused, just confused. She's been intimate with three guys in her life, she's had one long term relationship. She's never allowed herself to even think that she could be bisexual, a lesbian, queer, all of these labels that her mother speaks in private about with so much disdain. She can be nice and understanding regarding gay people in her everyday life. She has gay friends, which always sounds so cliche to say when trying to prove that someone is not homophobic, but when she talks privately to Brittany she says things like she would never "raise someone like that". So basically Brittany was raised to be open minded and accept everyone but herself, because being gay was ok for anyone but her mother's daughter.
So who is Brittany Pierce? She's not sure she knows after the past couple of years, and she's even more confused now that she's met Santana. She can admit that she's beautiful, and that she is physically attracted to her. She can admit that to herself. But she's kind of awesome too. She is unapologetically herself, and yet she's been on a journey. She wasn't born that way, her experiences, her failures brought her here. She wants to know how. She wants to know her story, her whole story. She's never met anyone like her.
And now Brittany finds that it really does not pay to run from one thing because you just end up running into another. She won't run from what she's feeling. She's just going to try and understand it.