Shocker
By: Brenna "Snakelady" Dawkins
A Gorillaz Fanfic
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Gorillaz the band and it's members, Murdoc, 2D, Russell, and Noodle all belong too some very lucky rich saps that aren't me.
Summary: Murdoc tries to quit his smoking habit with Russell's help. Can it be done before Murdoc can kill Russ?
"I-I-I gotta haf one!" Murdoc grit his teeth through the craving. Russell reached over and pressed a taser into the bassist's side and pressed the button. "SH-SH-SH-ITTE!" Murdoc yelled as electrical volts pulsed through his body. It'd been on the highest setting.
"You're gonna get over this. The first twenty-four hours of it are the worst." Russell replied coolly as Murdoc glowered at the drummer.
"I ain't gonna make it." Murdoc slumped in his seat on the couch in the Kong Studios television room. "Can't be done."
"Snap out of it, Mud's. You CAN beat your cig dependency. Hey, you wanna beer?" Russell stood to go to the kitchen.
Murdoc shook his head, "NO, I wanna cig!" Then he clapped his hands over his mouth and tried to inch away from the approaching Russell who held the dreaded taser in his hand. "No, I don' need one. I swear! Get away from me!"
But Murdoc received his dose of preventative medicine despite his best efforts to escape.
"I'm gonna kill you!" Murdoc swore and glared then reached for Russel. At which Russell held up the taser again and Murdoc shrunk back immediately. "Later." Russell left to get a beer.
Murdoc sat in misery watching the television. Some geezer was smoking up a storm on the tube and Murdoc found his eyes locked on the delicious stick filled with that wonderful stuff called tobacco.
"Russell'd better not catch you droolin' o'er 'dat." 2D entered and sat on the couch.
Murdoc didn't know he HAD been drooling. He looked over at 2D. Ah, the perfect way to vent his frustration. 2D then noticed the way Murdoc was looking at him and nervously stood back up, sensing his imamate doom. "U-u-um, I jus' 'membered, lef' the iron on!"
"Let it burn, shark bait." Murdoc grabbed at 2D and began to tattoo his frustration on the singer with his fists as usual.
When Russell came back in with his beer, 2D shuffled past him, cradling his elbow. The drummer noticed the new bruise on 2D's left cheek as well. Russell sat back down on the couch. Murdoc inched over to the opposite side and nearly hugged the armrest.
Russell shook his head, "You should learn to vent in more healthy ways. You shouldn't take your anger out on 2D, you know."
"Go shove yer head in th' toilet." Murdoc growled in answer.
Russell shrugged, "I COULD kick you of that habit too, you know. A shock for every punch you land on 2D."
Murdoc scowled. "I hate you."
"You're welcome." Russell replied, unfazed. The drummer tossed something at Murdoc who now flinched.
"Whazzat?" Murdoc cautiously picked the item up. Blessed chocolate. Nothing better to keep his mind off of--- well, you know. The Satanist tried to be satisfied with the candy. As he ate, he nervously began to drum his fingers on the armrest. Know what would go great with this chocolate? He thought to himself. A cig. There was a beer in the room too. It was almost obscene to have a beer in the room and no side stream smoke to add to the flavor. Please Satan, I need a cig, he thought desperately. He'd have to wait for Russell to go to sleep. That morning, he'd discovered where 2D had hid his cigs and he planned to snatch them as soon as his prison guard was unconscious. Murdoc cracked a smile at the possibility of finally getting a smoke after seven hours of cold turkey.
He couldn't help himself. An insane giggle escaped his lips. He felt something press against his ribs and yowled as the volts coursed through his system.
"WHOT?" Murdoc yelled.
Russell leaned back. "I know what you were thinking. Guess I'll have to get 2D to just destroy those cigs of yours before you sneak 'em."
Murdoc growled again in frustration swearing vengeance on the drummer. He'd have to work on his poker face while suffering from withdrawals. A few hours later, Russell looked at his watch.
"Time for lights out."
Murdoc wasn't about to leave the couch. "Screw you. I'm watchin' "Debbie Does Dallas" on the pay per view."
"I'm not trusting you on your own." Russell grabbed a protesting Murdoc and bodily dragged him to the drummer's room. Russell dug in his upper dresser drawer and pulled out a pair of handcuffs. "These'll make sure you stay put."
Murdoc found himself handcuffed to the footboard of Russell's bed. The large drummer had arranged Murdoc a makeshift bed on the floor. The bassist had a pillow and a blanket. Russell disappeared for a while. Murdoc suspected that the cigs were being disposed of. Dark thoughts against the Gorillaz drummer helped keep Murdoc's mind off of thinking of cig's. Russell came back dressed for bed.
"Be good." He told Murdoc and received a sneer from the Satanist. Russ easily fell asleep.
Murdoc, on the other hand found sleep impossible. He curled up beside the foot of the bed with the blanket slung over him and his wrist handcuffed to the post. His mind kept insisting that his tobacco content in his blood was too low and something must be done about it. But he didn't see how. He didn't know where Russell put the damned key to the cuffs. He grit his teeth against the need. Russell was always telling him that he'd thank him later for helping him kick his habit, but Murdoc doubted it. He loved his smokes too much. It gave him something to do in between gulps of vodka and during practice. 2D was still smoking, which killed him. But at least the singer didn't do it around him during his time of trauma.
Sleep came to him in snatches. He guessed he got two hours at the most. The rest of the time was spent thinking of horrible ways to get back at Russell for all the times he'd suffered preventative measures from the large American. By the time the drummer released him, his arm was killing him and he messaged it, snarling at Russell who turned his back to him to get breakfast. Of course, pummeling Russell was just a pipe dream of Murdoc's who knew the drummer would never let him get close enough to do it the way the docile 2D would. But it never hurt to dream. Red marks from where the cuffs bit into his flesh only served as a reminder that it would be an impossible mission. Russell may not be as tall as he was, but the drummer was big and intimidating. He wanted to go crash in his Winnie, but his sanctuary was off limits during this trying time. He knew there weren't any cigs left in there because Russell and 2D had covered every inch of his private domain in search of them.
If only he could get a hold of that damned taser! He grinned as he thought of what pleasures he could glean from using that hateful device upon his band mates. He sauntered into the kitchen where the smell of pork-flavored grease hit him. He sat down in a chair at the table. 2D sat across from him. Murdoc caught the scent of stale smoke clinging to the skinny singer and looked at 2D, his craving brought back up to the surface with renewed intensity.
2D looked nervously across at him. Murdoc felt something press against his ribs again but he moved fast and grabbed the taser from Russell's hands before he could get zapped.
Russell warily stepped back. 2D jumped away from the table and wisely ran out.
"Zap, zap, Russ." Murdoc held up the taser and grinned sadistically at him. Murdoc approached the drummer slowly. When he charged, the drummer hoofed it.
Murdoc went after Russell. The chase went all throughout Kong Studio's. Russell kept ahead of Murdoc, barely. They charged into the television room. The television was on with "Akira" playing loudly. Russel ran through the room with Murdoc hot on his tail. But Murdoc found himself flying through the air. Whot th'?
The taser was flung from his hand and he went sprawling across the floor. Noodle picked herself back up. She berated him in Japanese. He bet she was telling him to watch where he was going, only then did he realize he'd tripped over the kid. That or she could be cursing him out. Russell loomed over him with the taser in hand.
"Fook!" Murdoc muttered and received his shock. He roared and went after Russell who tried to ward off the bassist with multiple applications of the taser.
Soon, Murdoc found himself back in handcuffs, attached to Russ's bed, all alone. Well, Russ had been right, Murdoc thought through clenched teeth, the first twenty-four hours WERE the worst!
The End