Left Alone in the Darkness
by Mortheza
Summary: This story takes its place after the series. How does Tohma feel about what happened in the graveyard in New York?
"Eiri-san, where are you going?" I asked when I watched you turn around and walking away.
"I'm going back home."
That was your short reply, with it, you were gone, and I was left alone in the graveyard. I'm not going to bother to run after you, I know it that no matter what I say, I can't change your mind. I stood there for a second, then I took off to opposite direction.
Did you even notice the look on my face? No, I guess you didn't. Otherwise you would've thrown me a sarcastic comment about it. Or then you would've just ignored it, as usual.
I stopped. Should I call out your name? So I could tell you I'm sorry about what happened back then... Back then when we were still young, back then when you still trusted me?
If it weren't for me, you would've never gone through what you did, eventually. Heh, I should've known better. I should've seen your sensei's act. But did I? No, I just shrugged it always off. It was suspicious, yes, the way he looked at you, the way he acted when he was near you. I didn't do anything about it. Now I regret it.
It's my fault that you are what you are now. It's all my fault. Gomen nasai, Eiri-san. Gomen nasai. It's all my fault.
I feel the tears burning my eyes as I dwell in the past. I know I shouldn't be doing that, Mika-san has told me it many times, but I can't help it. I can't help about thinking that it's all my fault. I know it is. I was the one who wanted to go to New York in the first place. I was the one who wanted to take you with me.
I hate myself for letting that happen to you. I can never live with the truth. Everyone dear to me has tried to convince that it isn't my fault, but deep inside I know it is. No matter what the others keep telling me.
Now I'm back in this city. I came all the way here, just for you. Just to let you know what I really feel for you. And what did you do? Stabbed me right in my heart. I guess I deserve it.
One tear runs down my cheek, and I smile. Yes, I'm smiling through the tears, the usual smile I have.
But my eyes, they aren't smiling.
So, this is what darkness feels like. The darkness of a heart. And now I'm left alone in there. Left alone in the darkness.
Gomen nasai, Eiri-san, gomen nasai.
Owari
I know this is reeeeally short, but let me know what you think of it, okay? -smiles-
Mortheza