Disclaimer: I so do NOT own Harry Potter in any way, shape, or form.
She sighed as she stared down at her cup of tea, eyes boring into her rippling brown reflection.
"Why, whatever's the matter, dear?" Molly Weasley asked, sitting beside the Auror. Tonks smiled half-heartedly and shrugged.
"It's just been one of those days," she replied, taking a long sip of the bitter yet pleasing brew. She set the mug down and blew out a deep sigh, resting an elbow on the tabletop and resting her head on her hand, fingers burying themselves into her red, orange, and yellow hair.
"Your hair looks nice, dear. It's a new look for you, a fiery exterior to match a fiery spirit." Molly remarked with a comforting smile.
At this Tonks's eyes teared, her vision blurring. She blinked rapidly and willed the tears away, forcing a smile. Molly frowned, eyes demanding an explanation. Tonks didn't speak, unsure of what to say.
"Things have been hard recently, Molly," she began uneasily. "Very hard."
"You'll find the one, you shouldn't let this get you down any more than it already has." Molly replied.
Tonks shook her head. "It's not that, Molly. I'm not afraid of my heart being broken anymore, it will heal... It's..." She sighed, eyes closing and opening slowly. "I don't know what it is. A combination of things, I guess."
Mrs. Weasely looked at the young woman seriously. She did not look like a mature, capable Auror for the Ministry of Magic. She didn't look like an important member of the Order of the Phoenix. Tonks looked like a depressed, exhausted girl. Her heart ached for the sweet woman before her, as if she were one of her own children.
"Molly," Tonks whispered, eyes filling with tears again, "I need to confide in you."
"Absolutely, dear." Molly looked intently at her, placing her hand over Tonks's cold one, which had abandoned the warmth of her mug. "Anything."
"Today..." She sniffled, "I couldn't change myself. I woke up and my hair was its natural color... It wouldn't turn pink, no matter how I tried. I..." She closed her eyes in shame. "I had to go to a Muggle hairdresser early this morning, to dye it. There was no pink, so they had to do this," she motioned to her head, tears slipping down her cheeks. "I didn't want to just use magic, because it looks different... Not to mention that I didn't want anyone else to know about this."
Mrs. Weasely got up and pulled the girl into a gentle yet firm embrace, letting the other woman bury her face into her shoulder. "Don't be ashamed, my dear. I do not blame you for trying to keep up your appearance. You don't want to concern anyone, after all."
Tonks nodded in agreement. She only did it so that no one would ask her questions. Her mind was a mess, and she couldn't handle much more of their suspicions. Sirius's death, Remus's rejection... She cried harder, almost feeling her heart shattering inside her chest. Would she ever feel at peace again?
"My dearest Tonks, you must come to recognize your own limits," Molly pulled back, holding the Auror's face in her hands and looking into her glassy blue eyes. "I think you've gone beyond them, that you've done this to yourself. Only you can fix them; only you can fix yourself."
"But how will I ever do that?" Tonks replied, her voice barely above a whisper. She reached up to wipe the salty tears from her face, which had begun to itch as they had started to dry on her
skin.
Molly smiled reassuringly. "You'll know soon enough, I'm sure. You're a strong, creative girl, Tonks. If anyone can heal themself, it would be you. Trust in the power that lies within you, even if you feel it's unreliable at the moment." She placed a hand over her heart and nodded, as if affirming her statement.
The flame-haired girl nodded, leaning back in her chair and draining the rest of her mug of tea. "I'm afraid I must be off. As tired as I am, I have work to do."
"Don't use work as an escape from reality," Mrs. Weasely advised.
Tonks smiled genuinely. She'd read her mind with what Tonks assumed was mother's intuition. "I'll try not to. Thank you, Molly."
"Any time, Tonks. Just remember, you can do it." She older woman winked and gave her another smile.
Tonks turned and headed for the door, feeling better than she had before. She glanced at her reflection as she passed the mirror in the hallway, pausing to admire her new hair. It would certainly do until she regained control of her powers again. She nodded to her twin, who nodded at the same time. Together, they could do what needed to be done. Tonks wouldn't be afraid anymore.