Ed almost felt himself descend into fear once he saw Olivia holding onto Kristen Kringle's glasses. She was perched on the edge of his bed, waiting for him. She had one leg folded over the other, the glasses balanced on the edge of her fingers. She looked to him once he had closed the door. She didn't even say anything. He remained silent, removing his coat and hanging it up. Now he had to think of something. He had managed to fob Olivia off for so long, but he had been foolish to keep the glasses. He had been foolish to think that they wouldn't be discovered, but he liked having them. He liked to be reminded of what he was capable of.

"Don't lie to me," was all that Olivia said to Ed. He remained stood by the coat rack, giving her space. "Ed, just don't lie to me."

"Okay," was all that Ed responded with initially. He tried to compose himself, gathering his thoughts. He nodded his head once and cautiously went to sit down next to her, leaving a small gap between them. He needed to give her space. "Kristen is dead."

He spoke the words so simply. There was no emotion there. There was nothing there but fact. He had been devastated when he had done it. He had considered handing himself in, but then he had changed. He had realised that he had nothing to be fearful of.

"I see," Olivia said, hoping that there was more to this. She had been sat there for over an hour, wondering what Ed was going to say to her. She had thought up numerous scenarios in her head, but they all ended the same way. They all ended with her thinking the worst of Ed.

"She came over to collect her things," Ed began the tale. He was not going to lie to her. She was going to know the truth about what he had done to Kristen. Her reaction would influence what he did next. He had some ideas in his mind. "She began talking about you…saying things about you that weren't true. She told me how I never cared for her like you did you…how it would always be you I pined for. I told her that I did care. I wanted to make her feel better. I didn't want her to be angry and I…I let slip about Dougherty."

Olivia looked aghast at that. She turned to face Ed, tossing the glasses onto the bed beside her. She kept her hands by her sides, palms flat on the mattress. Ed pushed his glasses further onto his nose and he shrugged his shoulders.

"How could you tell her about Dougherty?" she demanded from him.

"I didn't mean to," Ed promised her. "I just said that he would not bother her again. I wanted her to be safe, honestly I did."

"Jesus Christ," Olivia whispered, running a hand down her face.

"I didn't think she would react how she did. I thought that she would be grateful that he wouldn't come back and hurt her," Ed continued, trying to convince Olivia to see the truth. He needed her to understand why he had done it. He had done it for them. "She didn't see it that way and she kept on taunting me…telling me how I wouldn't be with you…how I wouldn't be able to have my happy ever after and how a freak like me never deserved that."

Olivia remained silent, listening to Ed and trying to weigh up the gravity of the situation.

"She kept on saying how she wondered if you knew," Ed continued and Olivia's eyes widened. "She wondered if you knew and she…she kept on going…I tried to get her to stop. I begged her to keep quiet. All I wanted was for you and me to be together and be happy, but she wouldn't stop. She said how she would go to Jim. She wanted him to be the one to arrest you and I couldn't let her do that. I held her tightly against the door and begged her to reconsider…I didn't realise my hand was so tight around her throat."

Ed finished, knowing that Olivia could finish off the story. She wasn't foolish. Ed had tried to show enough regret on his face and in his voice. He did regret killing Kristen at the time, but ever since then he had not missed her. He had no regret because he had done what had been necessary. He had had to kill her. He had to do it.

"Where is she now?"

"Buried in the woods," Ed admitted.

"And you didn't tell me," Olivia concluded.

"I had already burdened you enough," Ed said, "I couldn't add more to your plate. You didn't deserve it."

"I don't want to think about this," Olivia said in a soft whisper, moving to her feet. She pushed a hand through her hair and felt sick. Kristen Kringle was dead. Ed had killed her. He had killed her to keep her quiet. "Why didn't you just let her go to the police? Better yet, why just not tell her?"

"I didn't mean for any of that to happen," Ed said, jumping to his feet and watching her pace up and down. "It was an accident, Olivia. I was trying to protect us…protect you…"

"No," Olivia snapped at him, pointing at him. "Do not say that you were trying to protect me!"

"I was!" Ed snapped back loudly, trying not to lose his temper. He didn't want to yell at her. He wanted to be calm, but he was struggling. He just needed her to come around to his way of thinking. "Olivia, I did this to keep you from jail. You know about Dougherty. Do you think that anyone would believe you didn't if Kristen started talking? I couldn't stand the thought of you even having to go through anything like a trial or worse…I love you. She was threatening to destroy us right after we had just gotten together."

Olivia continued pacing, stomach churning. She shook her head. Ed was right. Olivia had known what had happened. Kristen would have ruined everything. She would have destroyed everything.

"Why did you tell her?" was all that Olivia could ask from him. She sunk down onto the end of the bed and buried her head in her hands. She closed her eyes and tried to comprehend the mess that they were in. "Why did you have to tell her?" she repeated again.

"I am sorry for putting you in this position," Ed continued, gathering himself and trying to remain calm. He knew that it would be easier to keep Olivia on side than to push her away and anger her. He would do what was necessary. "I wanted to keep it from you."

"We promised not to lie to each other," Olivia reminded him.

"I know," he agreed with that statement. "And I told you about Dougherty because I wanted us to be honest, but I…I didn't want to burden you any further. I couldn't do that to you, Olivia."

"But you kept lying to me about her," Olivia said. "You kept telling me that she was fine when you knew what had happened."

"Because I was worried," Ed said to her. "I was worried that you would leave me…tell the police…tell your brother. What good would that do, Olivia? You were better off not knowing. You were better off not having any of that guilt on your shoulders."

She wanted to scream at him. She wanted to blame him for what he had done. She managed to look at him, finally meeting his gaze. All she saw was longing. He longed for her to believe him. He longed for her to see that he had done this and was full of regret. She didn't see a cold-blooded killer when she looked at Ed. She saw the Ed she knew. She saw the man who had been so kind to her. He couldn't harm anyone, not really.

"I just wanted her to be quiet," Ed finally concluded, shrugging his shoulders. "I wanted to protect her from Dougherty…I wanted her to see that…but then I had to protect you from her."

"I don't even know what to say," Olivia admitted to him. She was at a loss for words. She had so many thoughts going on in her mind about what she should do. The right to do would be to go to the police. It would be to turn themselves in an explain everything. But then she remembered Jim. He had killed Galavan. He had covered it up because he had been scared.

"I only want you, Olivia," Ed said to her. "All I wanted was for us to be together and be happy, like we have been. I didn't want Kristen to ruin that, but I never meant to kill her. I just needed her to understand."

"We should have been honest," was all that Olivia could say to Ed. "We should have been in honest in the first place because it has to be better than this…and maybe Kristen would still be alive."

"But it is too late," Ed said to her.

"It is too late," Olivia echoed back in confirmation to him. She nodded her head, agreeing with that sentiment. She did her best not to think too negatively, but it was difficult. She was finding it all too difficult. "But that doesn't make any of this right."

"What…what do you want to do?" Ed asked from her.

"I don't know," she admitted. She knew what the right thing was. She knew what she should do, but when she looked to Ed, she wondered if she had the guts to do it. She always thought that she knew the difference between right and wrong. She had prided herself on having morals, but they had slowly slipped away. She hid Jim's secrets. She hid Ed's secrets.

"Kristen is dead," Ed stated as a matter of fact. "It was an accident and I regret it, but going to jail…that won't bring her back."

"Don't use that as an excuse," Olivia demanded from him. "Just don't use that as an excuse, Ed."

"Please," Ed spoke to her, voice low. "I never wanted you to find out. I wanted to protect you."

"I don't doubt that," Olivia said. "This isn't right, Ed."

"What is right, Olivia?" Ed wondered back. "We both go down for accidents…we spend years in a cell. Would that make us feel any better than we feel now?"

"I just don't know how we can move on from this," Olivia said, voice hoarse. "How can we go back to how we were? How can we ever be together and forget about what happened?"

Ed reached his hand out towards her, grabbing hold of her hands. He scrambled to kneel in front of her, looking her in the eye as he saw tears form there. She tried to keep herself composed, but she was failing miserably.

"Because I love you," Ed said to her. "I love you and I don't want this to ruin us, Olivia. We can feel guilt while sat in a cell or…or we can try to move through this together. We can try to work through it because we belong together."

Olivia knew that he was right. Kristen was dead. Ed had killed her. It had been an accident. They could go to jail and spend time in a cell, but it wouldn't bring her back. Perhaps it might ease some of the guilt to know that they had done the right thing? But Olivia didn't know if that would be the case.

"Just tell me you love me," Ed whispered, a hand going to her cheek and guiding her to look at him. Her eyes met his and he continued to examine her, wondering what she was thinking.

"Of course I love you," she said.

"Then we can make it through this," Ed promised her. "We can do this, Olivia."

"How can you sound so sure?"

"Because this is us," Ed said. "How much have we dealt with, Olivia? How much have we overcome to be together?"

Olivia suspected that he had a point. Nodding her head, she gulped. She had made a decision about her brother to protect him just as she had protected Ed. She couldn't stop protecting Ed, not now.

"I need time," Olivia said to him. "Just give me to time to work this out in my head."

She stood up and moved into the bathroom. Ed let her go by. He sat on the edge of the bed and leaned back, hands going to cover his eyes. He let out a long sigh before turning his head to the side and looking at Kristen's glasses, his lips quirking. He would have Olivia on his side before he knew it.

…

Harvey and Olivia sat in the courtyard of the jail. Olivia had been reluctant to sit down on the metal bench, but she did so after Harvey had done it. She had found out that Harvey was going to visit Jim and she had pleaded with him to let her come. He had agreed, knowing that the news she had for Jim would be better off coming from her than from him. Lee had called her over a week ago to tell her that she had lost their baby. Olivia had gone out to see her for a few days, consoling her and looking after her. Lee had insisted that she would be fine, but she didn't know how to tell Jim in a letter.

"Looking good, brother," Harvey said to Jim as he walked into the yard.

Olivia saw him frown at the sight of her. She and Harvey both stood up. Pointing to Harvey, Jim glared at his friend.

"You brought her here?"

"Considering you've refused to grant me visitation I had to get creative," Olivia said to her brother. "You can't keep refusing me visitation, Jim. I'm your sister."

Harvey slapped Jim on the shoulder before Olivia moved over to him. Flinging her arms around his neck, she gripped tightly onto him. Placing his arms around her waist, he rested his chin on the top of her head, keeping her in his grip for a few moments. He had missed this. He had missed having someone tell him that they still cared for him in person.

"I miss you," Olivia said to her brother.

Pulling back, she noted his prison number on his blue shirt tucked into dark trousers.

"I miss you too," Jim said, kissing the top of her head. "So what brings you two here?"

"I had to see how you were doing," Harvey said to him. "I heard you're in gen pop now. I'm trying to get Dent to reopen the case and I'm looking into finding Penguin. Someone has to know where he is. If we find that weasel then we make him speak."

"Right," Jim said, sitting down as the two of them did the same across from him. "Good to hear that someone's still looking into my case…and how's Lee?"

Olivia could feel Harvey looking at her. He wanted her to be the one to do this and she nodded. She reached a hand out to hold onto Jim's. Jim looked at her, knowing that she had bad news. The forlorn look on her face told him that. But she also looked different. Jim swore she had lost weight.

"Lee…Jim…she phoned me the other week and told me that she had had a miscarriage," Olivia said, realising there was no easy way to tell him. "She lost the baby, Jim."

Her brother's hand slipped from hers then and he stood up. Olivia moved to her feet too as Jim backed away from both of them. His face had fallen and Olivia could almost feel her own heart break for him. He began to move back to the door as she called after him.

"Jim!" she begged with him to come back.

"Leave him," Harvey urged from her, grabbing hold of her wrist and stopping her from going after Jim. "He needs time. He needs to process this."

"He shouldn't be in here, Harvey."

"I know," Harvey agreed with her. "Jim might not be completely innocent, but he isn't a bad man…then again, who is entirely innocent?"

Olivia nodded. "No one," she said in a whisper.

….

Olivia had been struck down by the flu the following week. She was exhausted and constantly feeling the need to be sick whenever she ate something. She couldn't keep food down and hadn't even gone back to work in weeks. Harvey had intended to tell her what he was going to do, but he knew that it was best to keep her in the dark. Jim wouldn't want her to be a part of what he was going to do. His intention was to bust Jim out of jail. Olivia would support him if she knew, but Harvey also worried that she would tell Ed.

"You need to try to eat something," Ed informed her.

She was still staying at his apartment considering that she had moved out of her own and had nowhere else to go. She was still on leave from work and it had been over three months since Jim had been sent to jail.

"I'm not hungry," Olivia said.

She was sat up in bed, the duvet pooled at her lap. She was sweating and her hair clung to her cheeks. She pushed it back, tucking it behind her shoulders. She looked to Ed as he finished making her a cup of green tea. Walking over to the bed, he perched on the side of it, placing the cup on the bedside table. He moved the back of his hand over her forehead.

"You still feel warm," he commented and moved a hand down her hair. "But you need to try to eat something. Is there anything you might want to consider eating?"

"No," Olivia responded.

"Well, in that case I will make you something easy to eat…soup might be good," Ed said to her.

"Ed, it is fine," she promised him.

She had spent weeks thinking about Ed's secret. She hadn't told anyone. Instead she had kept it to herself. She felt like a hypocrite too. How could she complain that he had kept a secret when she also had her own secrets? She was keeping Jim's secret from Ed. But she had convinced herself that was different. The weeks had been tense, but Ed had given Olivia space. He had given her the space she needed and the time she wanted.

She had seen Jim in jail and she doubted that she could even consider handing Ed in. She didn't want him to spend his days in a cell like Jim. So that meant there was only one thing to do. She would keep the secret. She was already so deep into all of this that there was no escaping now.

"I just want to look after you," Ed said to her.

"I know," she said. "I know."

There was a silence between them. Olivia let it linger for a few moments before she reached out. Taking hold of Ed's hand inside of her own, she let her eyes wander down to the entwined limbs. Ed remained silent, realising that this was the first time in months she had initiated contact between them.

"I don't want it to be like this," she admitted to Ed. "But I realise that I can't…we can't be together, Ed. We don't deserve to be happy, not after the lies we have told…but I can't tell the truth. I can't stand the thought of sending you to jail."

"No," Ed said quickly, shaking his head. "Olivia, you do not mean this."

"I do," she responded. "I am being serious, Ed. I cannot be with you and be happy when I know the truth. Dougherty…I accepted that you wanted to protect Kristen, but killing Kristen so that we can be happy just feels dirty. It feels so wrong."

Ed gripped tightly onto her hand then. "No," Ed said firmly. "Olivia, why deny your own happiness…our happiness?"

"Because we don't deserve it!" Olivia snapped.

"So what?" Ed asked from her. "We end this? We end what we have and we both just be miserable? Olivia, I don't want to move on from you. I don't want any of that."

"Neither do I," she admitted, "but how can we really be together?"

"Because we love each other," Ed hissed. "That has to be enough."

"And if it isn't?" she asked him. "If we can't move on from this?"

"We will," he said confidently.

"But how can we?"

"No," Ed said forcefully. "Olivia, I can't accept that."

"It isn't a question of what is acceptable," she responded. "I'm serious, Ed. It's all I've thought about and it is killing me to do this because I love you. I love you so much."

"Then just let us move on," Ed urged from her.

Olivia shook her head. "It isn't that simple," she said. "I've thought about it, Ed, and that's my decision."

Ed saw her begin to cry then. She moved from his bed. Standing up, she reached for the drawer she kept her clothes in. She pulled her suitcase out from underneath his bed. He watched her and shook his head. He wouldn't let her do this. He had done everything for her. Moving to his feet, Ed felt his anger grow inside of him.

"Everything I have done," he began in a low drawl, voice slightly dark, "has been for us, Olivia. It has been for us…so that we can be together. And now you stand there and you tell me that you're leaving me?"

Olivia looked over to him as he moved towards her. He took hold of her wrists and stopped her from packing her things. She straightened up and tried to pull free from him, but his grip was too tight. She frowned and looked him in the eye. "Ed, let go of me."

"I don't think so," Ed responded, voice gruff. "I love you, Olivia. I love you too much to let you go and ruin what we have…and you will see that. You will see that I am right in time."

"Ed…what…" Olivia struggled to get the words out.

She felt him take hold of her wrist with one hand and pull her around in the apartment. She wondered what he was doing as he opened up the cupboard in the corner where he kept his cleaning supplies. She tried to pull free from him, consistently urging him to let her go. She let her eyes widen as she saw him pull out a piece of rope from a holdall.

"Ed, what the hell are you doing?" she demanded from him.

"I didn't want to do this," Ed said to her, "but I can't let you go, Olivia. You'll see…I promise that you'll see."

"Ed!" Olivia shrieked his name as she fought him with as much might as she could. She managed to slap at his hands until she was free from his grip. She ran as fast as she could towards the door, wondering exactly what was going on. This was not Ed. This was not her Ed. "What is wrong with you?"

"What is wrong with me?" Ed demanded from her, catching up with her, arm going around her waist as he hauled her over to the bed again. "How can you even ask me that?"

"Because normal boyfriends do not try to tie their girlfriends up when they are leaving them!" she snapped loudly at him.

Ed managed to drop her onto the mattress. Straddling her, he kept his weight on top of her as she lay beneath him. He reached for her wrists, managing to bring them together as she tried to buck him off of her. She failed to stop him from tying her wrists together before hooking the rope through the headboard, securing her there. Olivia began to cry loudly, shaking her head.

"No," she said firmly, "Ed…please…this is what he did to me…he did this to me…"

"I am nothing like him," Ed said to her, hands moving to hold her cheeks. "Olivia, I am nothing like the Ogre, you know that. I am doing this to make you understand that we can be together…that you can't leave me…"

"No," Olivia continued, unable to comprehend how this had happened. Why was he doing this? Why would he do this to her? "Ed…no…you know that I would never tell anyone-"

"-It isn't about that," Ed interrupted her. "I know that you would never tell anyone. You love me and care too much, but I can't let you go…I love you."

"So you're going to keep me tied to your bed until I give in?" she demanded. "Ed, that isn't love."

"Olivia, please, you will see," he said to her. "You will see that we can work through this, but I can't let you leave. You need to be here to understand."

Olivia said nothing, trying to struggle free from the restraints. She failed miserable as Ed moved from her. He pulled the shirt she wore down her body so that it came to her mid thigh. He pulled the duvet up her body and sat back down on the edge of the bed, hand resting on her neck as he bent down closer to her.

"I am going to make everything alright," Ed said to her, kissing her on the forehead. "But first, you need something to eat."

Olivia wanted to cry at everything that had happened. Why was he doing this? Why did he not understand? Why did she have to find the glasses? She had been happy living in ignorant bliss. She had been thrilled to live completely ignorantly, but now this had happened. How could he tie her to his bed? How could he do this? Olivia watched him wander around the kitchen. She tried to gather her thoughts, knowing that she had to get out somehow. He couldn't keep her tied to the bed forever.

….

A/N: Do let me know what you think!