Chapter Twenty-Seven: Take a Look at Me Now
Brooke took a deep breath as she took in her appearance in the mirror. Usually, accessorizing was among her strongest points, but that day she couldn't remember how she ever did it.
Her face was unusually pale. The black she was wearing detracted from her usually bright appearance and looked out of place in the summer day.
Deciding that the mirror was not a positive option, she looked down at the mess of cue cards on her desk. She'd promised Mouth's parents that as his oldest, bestest friend she'd write him a speech, but it was impossible to pour Mouth into a speech.
Thinking of it made Brooke tear up again.
"You ready to go?" asked Lucas, coming into the room behind her. She looked over her shoulder at him-he was wearing a single breasted black suit and a silk tie. He looked incredible.
"Yeah," she said, gathering up her notes and stuffing them into her handbag.
XxxxxxX
Nathan, Ryan, Brooke and Lucas met Jake, Peyton, Davis and Haley in front of the church. Lucas looked at them warily, feeling entirely left out, feeling entirely unable to voice his thoughts.
"How're you doing?" asked Jake eventually, moving toward Brooke and squeezing her hand.
"I'm okay," she said, smiling slightly.
"He was a nice guy," said Haley inadequately. Brooke examined how they were standing; with Haley in between Jake and Peyton. She sighed.
"Let's get this over with," she said, taking Lucas' hand again and leading them up to the church.
Brooke had imagined that somehow, by some miracle, that by the time the funeral was underway and she'd reached the front to deliver her speech, she'd have some vague inkling of what to say. She had imagined incorrectly, as it happened.
"Hi. Uh, hello. I'm Brooke Davis, and…" Brooke looked down at the crowd. The mourning crowd, remembering the boy that enriched the lives of everyone he met. Who'd enriched her life when it seemed that no one could.
FLASHBACK"You guys are leaving? What the hell am I supposed to do for the next two months?" demanded Brooke Davis.
"Darling, don't swear. And I'm sure you'll think of your own ways to have fun," said her mother encouragingly. As if it wasn't enough that her four best friends had taken off for the summer, now her parents had to jet off to the UK for business.
Brooke waved dejectedly as her parent's drove off for the airport. During the year, Tree Hill was her playground, her kingdom, but during the lonely, hot summer she was it's prisoner.
She perked up when she saw a mini van pull up to the long empty house across the street. The first few to get out didn't interest her-a mom, a dad, two little kids. But after a moment, a boy of about her age climbed out. Brooke smiled. Finally, something to do this summer.
End flashback
"You know, I had a whole speech prepared. About Mouth's life, and all the great things he did. But of course, all of you all knew these things. Because you were all on the sidelines, cheering him on, like I should have been. I don't think Mouth ever truly knew how much I loved him, and still love him. When we got to high school, I…" Brooke glanced down at the crowd. How could she explain what had happened between her and Mouth? She'd never truly understood it herself. "I changed. I started following rules, meeting standards. Mouth showed that he was a better person than all of us by escaping those standards. He followed his interests. He did his own thing."
Through the tears beginning to fill her eyes, Brooke smiled. How else could one describe her first love?
FLASHBACK"Hi, I'm Brooke Davis. I live across the street!" said Brooke cheerily to the new neighbours an hour later. The neighbour took the pie she was holding.
"Thank you. My name's Sheila McFadden, we just moved here from Long Island. Would you like to come in?"
Brooke nodded and skipped in behind the woman. She made a mental note to stop skipping. After all, high school was starting in September.
Sitting at the counter in the kitchen were a boy and a girl. Brooke smiled to them.
"Kids, this is our new neighbour Brooke. Brooke, this is Jesse and Dana," said Mrs. McFadden, smiling.
"Mama, I wanna go swimming," moaned the girl.
"Hush. Daddy's getting the pool put in next week," reprimanded her mother.
"You know, there's a pool at the Community Centre, and we could walk there from here. I could take them," offered Brooke. The woman looked reluctant to entrust her children to a neighborhood girl, but she did look exhausted.
"That's very sweet, but their brother could take them…"
"Oh, but he doesn't know where it is. I'll take all three of them!" she said graciously.
Mouth McFadden looked amazed to be torn from his unpacking his new bedroom and coerced into going with his siblings and the new neighbor to the neighborhood pool. But he went along with it.
"So what's your real name, Mouth?" she asked eventually, bored from the lack of conversation. He looked sideways at her, noting her sparkling eyes, dimples and even features.
"Marvin. If you call me that I might have to kill you," he said. She raised her eyebrows.
"I'll uh, consider myself warned. How's Tree Hill working out for you so far?" she asked. She blushed as his eyes fell further, to the cleavage exposed in her tank top. He looked up again quickly and smiled.
"I'd have to say it's looking better," he admitted. Brooke smiled as they neared the pool.
End flashback
"Mouth was special. He knew what he wanted, even if he didn't always know how to get it. He didn't mind babysitting his pesty siblings…" Brooke glanced down again and noted what had once been pesty younger siblings had somehow, inexplicably, become a preteen and a full fledged teenager. "Even if he knew he could be hanging out with his new girlfriend."
FLASHBACK"What are you doing this summer?" he asked.
"Like, nothing! Haley and Peyton went off to summer camp and Jake went to Spain for some reason and Chris went back to wherever the hell he came from," said Brooke bitterly. Mouth, who had only been trying to make conversation, looked surprised.
"Okaaay. You're going to Tree Hill High in September?" he asked.
"Yeah. I can't wait. Kind of. You know next summer we'll just be partying all the time," she said happily.
"That's not my kind of thing," he said apologetically.
"I don't know if it's my kind of thing either. But hey, I have layers," she said, looking sideways at her new friend and winking."
End flashback
"So we're really missing out. All of us are. The whole world is. Because he would have really been something, if he'd had the chance. That was always obvious. The first time we ever kissed was when he came over to fix my hardrive, because it was making buzzy noises. I still don't really know what a hard drive is…"
FLASHBACK"Your house is nice. And surprisingly free of boxes," said Mouth in appreciation, as he shut down her computer.
"Thanks. You know we considered that but then decided it would be waaay too nineties," she said. He laughed.
"You're funny. You know, I thought I'd be stuck babysitting all summer," he said.
"Then I guess you're lucky I showed up," she said. He looked up at her in surprise. She was wearing a sundress and sitting on the countertop, swinging her feet back and forth. He got flustered so easily. It was oddly endearing. Finally he founds words.
"In more ways than one." Brooke silently slipped off the counter and walked toward him. He wasn't anything like any man she'd ever dreamt of. He was short, and scrawny, and he had a disproportionately large mouth. But maybe that was the secret in finding a guy that wasn't an asshole?
"Hi," she said, as they linked hands.
"Hi," he said. Slowly they leaned toward each other. Their lips met. Softly. Gently. Brooke cautiously opened her lips to him. As she fluttered her eyelids closed, she began to understand.
End flashback
"When I got up here, I thought words would come to me. And I guess they did. A nonsensical, unconnected series of words that make no sense and follow no patterns. But life shouldn't always follow patterns. I think that's what my first love taught me, and I think that is how I'll remember him," said Brooke. She glanced around at the crowd again. Did they understand that she was finished? Did it matter?
XxxxxxX
"Bitch alert, nine o'clock," said Brooke under her breath to Haley. Haley looked skeptically at her best friend, wondering if it was the same girl who'd just cried buckets over her ex-boyfriend.
"You know, I'm going to go talk to Ryan. She looks like she needs me," said Haley, darting off before Davis could approach.
Haley stared at Brooke and Davis, wishing traitorously that they were anywhere but a wake so that she could have license to kick the brunette's ass. She sighed and made her way over to Ryan. She liked Ryan. Ryan was maybe not a backstabbing bitch.
"Hey," she said, when she'd reached her.
"Hey. Not to sound crude, but who was this guy?" she asked.
"Brooke's ex. I never really got the chance to get to know him, but he was a nice guy," said Haley.
"Brooke seems to be coping well," she said in surprise.
"Yeah. I guess she let it all out, or something," said Haley.
"You know, I like Brooke. She's bouncy. And I like you. Do you like my brother?" she asked casually. Haley rolled her eyes, glad that Ryan was a year younger than her and that she could therefore ignore her comments as child's play.
"Damnit, she's coming here," said Haley under her breath, as Davis, now with Peyton, glanced in their direction.
"Oh look, it's my namesake!" said Ryan in false excitement, as Davis came toward them. Haley glanced at her. Was it possible that Davis looked intimidated?
"Well, if it isn't penultimate Scott," she said.
"Look, there's Lucas! Let's go talk to him!" said Peyton, stopping the scene before it could happen. Davis rolled her eyes and followed Peyton. Haley turned to Ryan, impressed.
"Sorry about that. Shannon is pretty much the only person in the world who makes me into such a bitch. She rubs me the wrong way, you know?" said Ryan. It took Haley a moment to register that "Shannon" and Davis were one and the same.
"Yeah. You know I'd invite you to join the club, but it seems like you started the club," said Haley appreciatively.
"You know it. So, about my brother…" said Ryan, making Haley roll her eyes once more.