Chapter Seventy-Six: Heaven and Hell

"Jake? I brought you something!" said Ryan. Jake ran to the front door to see Ryan pulling in Eve's stroller. He raised his eyebrows.

"You stole your niece?" he asked, leaning down to look at her.

"No, Haley lent me her. They seemed to want to be alone," said Ryan, smiling.

"Well, their loss is our gain. How long do we get her for?" he asked.

"Until tomorrow. You don't mind?" she asked. She watched as his strong hands reached into the stroller to lift her out.

"Mind? This is going to be fun. Want to go out?" he asked.

"Yeah. Uh, give her to me. Haley mentioned that she might be cold or something," said Ryan.

Ryan took her niece to the bedroom while the buzzer rang.

She sang to Eve while she changed her diaper. Ever since the kiss that Jake didn't seem to even remember, she'd felt awkward around him. Their once easy embraces, platonic touches, had been so strained.

She stopped at the door when she heard Jake's voice rise in anger. Taking a deep breath, she lifted Eve higher onto her hip and walked hesitantly into the hall.

"Give me another chance. I love you, Jake," said Peyton urgently.

"This is crap, Peyton. And you know it. It's never going to happen," he said. Peyton rolled her eyes and caught sight of Ryan with a baby in her arms.

"You promised, Jake. That night. So many night. You promised to love me forever," she said. She was looking at Ryan. Not Jake. Feeling awkward under the heat of her stare, Ryan glanced at Jake. He weakened for a moment.

"Ryan, you ready to go?" he asked. Both girls gasped at the cruelty of his statement.

"Yeah," she said, placing Eve back in her stroller.

"You still love her," accused Ryan, as the two of them walked through the park. She smiled up at the orange and brown leaves. Jake Jagielski had made her secretly miserable for years, but she loved sharing this with him.

"Of course," he said eventually.

"I don't get it. She's a completely different person. She's crazy. How can you love her so much?" she asked.

"She is. She's lonely," he said.

"She had sex with Professor Braddock!" said Ryan in amazement. To her left, Jake almost smiled.

"You would, too. Guy's a fox," he said jokingly. Ryan playfully shoved him.

"Do you really think you can have everything with her? Have…" Ryan looked around, at the various couples strolling together, many of them with a stroller. "Have this?"

"I can't just give up on her, Ry. I've been in love with her since the fifth grade. I want to help her. But I can't," he said.

As she frowned, he sent her a subtle, slightly annoyed look. She knew what he was thinking: that she didn't understand, that she couldn't. She wondered what would happen if she kissed him, right then and there.

She wondered if it would end her torment.

"Is this your baby? She's beautiful," said a passing elderly woman. Ryan instantly manufactured a smile, hoping not to be recognized as a Scott.

"What a nice couple," they heard the woman remark to her husband as they walked past them. Ryan glanced up at Jake and smiled.

"We do make a nice couple," he said, fondly looping an arm around her waist. She attempted a smile. Jake Jagielski was blind like no man she'd ever met in her life…

Ryan and Jake flipped a coin to determine who Eve would sleep with. When Ryan won, Jake helpfully bottle fed Eve before handing her back to Ryan and going to bed.

The room was silent, but Ryan couldn't sleep. She lay awake for hours, staring at Eve. Eve occasionally rolled over, or sighed in her sleep. Ryan was almost relieved when Eve began to scream.

Though the baby was aware that her aunt was not Haley, she calmed easily in her arms. She made grabs for Ryan's long blonde hair when it fell down toward her. Ryan smiled. Holding her niece brought out hidden desires in her. She wondered what a child of her and Jake would look like.

Ryan was lonely. Lifting Eve into her arms, she walked out of her room and in to Jake's. Jake was sleeping stretched out on his bed, his arm thrown over his pillow. She tiptoed toward him and sat down in his bed. Her hold on Eve loosened as they both laid down in the bed. She rested her head on Jake's arm and waited for sleep to come.

The next morning, Jake was surprised to awake to the baby's quiet crying, his arms wrapped around his roommate.

"Ryan?" he said in surprise. She awoke slowly and felt her entire body pressed against his, his arms looped around her.

"Jake," she said. She couldn't help the wave of contentment and desire that washed through her.

"Couldn't sleep?" he asked. He seemed to take their spooning quite calmly.

"No," she said. They had done this before, but they'd never woken up so close.

Jake inhaled the scent of her hair before coming to a startling realization-he didn't with she were Peyton. He was happy with Ryan in his arms.

"I have to get up and feed the baby," she said, sounding surprised to hear herself speaking.

Jake followed her to the kitchen and watched as she heated up a bottle of formula. He'd been insensitive the previous night, he realized. Ryan would never realize that she was the foremost girl in his heart, even if he loved Peyton forever.

Slowly he walked to her and placed his hands on her hips. Underneath him, she stiffened. He turned her to face him and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I love you. You mean everything to me. You know that, right?" he said. She looked up into his eyes and smiled.

"I do know. And I love you too," she said, reaching up to peck his cheek.

"Peyton's probably always going to be around. But you definitely are. I'm not going to replace you," he promised.

"You'd better not," she said, relaxing her head on his chest.

His lips grazed her forehead as Eve began to complain loudly from her chair.

Jake left to shower, and Ryan watched him long after he'd gone. Part of her knew she should pack up and leave. He'd never love her the way she needed it. Would it ever be enough?

"What am I doing here?" asked Haley aloud, surprised to wake up on her wide bed, next to Nathan. She shivered before realizing that she was clad only in her bra and underwear.

"You fell asleep in the study," said Nathan. She turned slightly to see him sitting on the edge of the far side of the bed, with his back to her.

"You carried me up?" she asked. She saw his head nod before he stood and began to walk out of the room.

"Of course."

"Nathan, I know what you're trying to do." The words escaped from Haley's mouth before she could stop them.

"What is it that I'm doing?" he asked.

"You're trying to make me see the light. Fall into your arms for our happily ever after. It's not going to happen," she said.

"Right, because you're not in love with me. I'd forgotten," he said sarcastically.

"Get over yourself. I'm not. I would have been by now, had you stayed. But you didn't. You left," she said angrily. He turned to her, his face calm. For a moment, he eyed her with interest.

"That was three years ago. Can you honestly say you've changed?" she demanded. She stiffened as she felt his eyes roam over her bra, her breasts threatening to spill out.

"I got you, didn't I?" he asked calmly.

"You don't have me," she argued

"I'm sorry, were you here last night?" he asked. "I had you in every way known to man and then some. I married you and you sleep in my bed every night. Face it Haley you belong to me and you know it."

"Never," she spat at him. "You'll never own me, not the way a man who had my love could. See but that's just it with you Nathan isn't it? You don't really care about me. It's all just about possession and victory. You just need to be able to feel like you've won. Well congratulations you've won and married me but doesn't it kill you knowing that it was by default, that the only reason I'm here today was because I needed your money. I didn't come here because I loved you, I came here simply as a means to an end."

He stiffened at her words turning to look at her. "Gee Haley if I didn't know better I would think you were trying to make me angry. What are you hoping for a repeat performance of last night? Hoping that if you get me angry enough that I'll ravage you just like I did last night. Huh is that it Hales? Well you know Haley there is no need for all these games all you have to do is ask."

She rolled her eyes at him. "Do you really think what you did was that special."

"Now Haley there's no need to try and deny it. I'm more than happy to give you just what you want."

"Ha, like you even know what I want."

"Oh I do and I believe it starts with a little something like this," he said as he rolled towards her suddenly pinning her beneath him on the bed.

She squirmed and he smiled remembering vividly the events of the night before. Leaning down he ran his tongue over the pulse point in her neck and was gratified to feel her shiver in response. Slowly he began kissing his way lower and lower down her body stopping to give extra attention to her engorged nipples straining through the lace of her bra. He could hear her beginning to pant and continued his way lower still, he could feel her body tensing in anticipation as he drew closer and closer to his destination. His thumbs slid under the waistband of her panties drawing them down ever so slowly.

Finally she was exposed to his waiting mouth. Putting his hands under her hips he lifted her up to give him easier access before beginning to use his tongue to pleasure her. He started slowly at first, with tantalizingly slow licks and thrusts of his tongue. He felt her hands come down to grip his hair trying to hold him closer, wanting to feel his tongue even deeper inside of her and paused to smile. No matter what she said with her words, her body could never lie to him.

He started to increase the tempo of the thrusts of his tongue and felt her hips start bucking in response. He knew he had her exactly where he wanted her. He could hear the soft little pants and moans that she always made when she was getting close to orgasm. Reaching a hand up he began massaging her left breast in rhythm with the tempo of his tongue and felt her excitement increase if that was possible.

Her hips started jerking and she moaned his name. "Oh Nathan, I'm so close."

Looking up at her he smiled. "Well in that case I'm finished," he said.

"What?" she choked out still caught up in the sensations that he had been causing mere moments before.

"What do you mean?"

"Well according to you I don't even know what you want. So I wouldn't want to spoil your image of me. So I'll just leave you to it, I'm sure you can find some way to relieve yourself," he said rolling away from her.

Her eyes snapped open as she finally absorbed what he was saying. Noticing him lying over the other side of the bed apparently engrossed in the newspaper she stared in disbelief.

"No way," she said.

He didn't even bother to glance up at her. "No way what?" he asked mildly showing little interest in hearing her response.

"No way are you going to leave me like this. You cannot get me all worked up like this then just leave me unsatisfied."

He didn't respond and she reached over slapping his arm. When he continued to

ignore her she slid over closer to him her hand brushing over his hair roughened thigh.

"Come on Nathan, I'll make it worth your while," she wheedled.

His hand came down to grasp hers firmly removing it from his leg. "Haley do you mind I'm trying to read the business pages."

She almost screamed in frustration as he continued to ignore her. She couldn't let him get away with this. Ripping the sheet from his body she moved to straddle him.

"You cannot leave me like this," she said. She stroked a hand over his muscled chest as he watched her. Leaning down she teased his nipple with her tongue. He moved the paper in front of her continuing to read.

Angrily she pulled it out of his hands. "I want all of your attention on me," she pouted.

"Well then you're going to have to do better than that," he said.

She could see the challenge in his eyes and her determination grew. She put her lips to his jaw kissing along his jaw line, her hands slipping into his boxer shorts and stroking over his length. She heard him moan and knew that victory would be hers. Angling her mouth over his she kissed him still stroking his shaft and felt him begin to stir in her hands. She moved back kissing down his chest making her way down, pulling his boxer shorts from him as she did. She brushed her thumb over his tip and felt his erection growing, massaging his balls she gently licked down his length than back up again before capturing him in her mouth.

He groaned louder as her teeth scraped over him, he grasped her head pushing her down so that she took more of him into her mouth. His erection by now was pulsing and grasping her hips he lifted her up and impaled her on him. She moaned his name as she lifted herself up and down each movement taking him deeper inside of her. She looked at him and found him watching her intently, staring into her eyes as he thrust into her. She couldn't drag her eyes away from his as she felt his climax start to hit, her own body climaxing in response to his. They continued to stare at each other as the waves of pleasure rocked their bodies. Only when she felt him start to grow limp did she tear her gaze away from his rolling away from him, unable to look at him in case he saw the truth in her eyes.