Okay, so maybe I overreacted back there, what with shoving a pie into Superintendent Wus face. But did I regret it? Heck no! ... Well, okay maybe a little. Especially now since this is now most likely going to get me thrown out of the Jade palace... Can't exactly say it was worth it now can I? But on one positive note, I think it's safe to say that I managed to do something that probably many many others had wanted to do to Wu.
I quickly slithered away from the front entrance of the barracks. I'm pretty sure that's the last place I want to head back to right now. So instead, I headed over to the only other place I could think of at the time. The training hall. Although I didn't exactly have much of a chance to do so as the barrack doors opened behind me revealing Yinshen. She seemed oddly happy.
"You know, if that's how the warriors of the Jade palace serve food to guests, I think I'll pass on lunch". She joked as she closed the distance between the two of us.
"Hey Yinshen". I half smiled.
"You okay"?
"You mean apart from the fact that I just messed up and am about to be fired? Yeah, I'm walking on sunshine".
"Well, maybe it won't come to that".
I raised an eyebrow.
"What do you mean"?
"Do you still have that scroll I sent you informing the Jade palace of our arrival"?
"Shifu should still have it, yeah. Why does it matter"?
"You'll see". She smirked.
"... I take it you have a plan"?
"Maybe".
"Great. Now I don't know whether to feel worse off or not now". I joked.
"Cute. Anyway I won't keep you long. I'm not the only one who wanted to have a little chat with you anyway".
"Oh good. Maybe they can help me pack my bags then. There's no way I'm heading back into the barracks with Wu in it".
"Fair enough. I'll go get her for you since you're being such a big baby about this".
She? ... Oh, of course...
I watched as Yinshen was about to leave until she faced me once more, seeming to have forgotten to mention something.
"Oh, and since I'm helping you out. Do something for me"?
"Sure. Name it".
"Give me permission to take one free shot at Mantis".
I snorted.
"You need permission? What's stopping you this time"?
"Well, let's say being a member of Gongmen city has an equal amount of downs compared to ups. Your friend has been trying to chat me up as well as attempt... some other things. And I can't do a single thing about it as it would most likely get me fired. But I can get away with it if I ask permission from, oh, let's say a kung fu master who trains under the same palace as him. So do we have a deal"?
I really didn't feel like knowing what Yinshen meant by "Other things". But still, it was worth the risk.
"Either way, it's win win for me. Deal".
"Preciate it".
I watched as Yinshen left to enter the barracks again and talk to Shifu about the scroll. I wasn't sure what she was planning on using it for, but right now I'll take whatever I can if it gives me even a tiny chance of staying at the Jade palace. Before I could think about it any longer, a new figure slithered out.
"Hi Vipes. Hows our guest"?
"He'll be fine. That was a bit rude of you to do what you did don't you think"?
"Well, he did deserve it".
Actually on second thoughts, a pie to the face was too kind. But I would never physically harm someone unless they were a proper threat to the Valley or my friends.
"Maybe. But violent behavior solves nothing".
I gave a small chuckle.
"Is that supposed to be irony"?
"I meant when it's uncalled for. You could have just put the pie down and walked away".
"... Yeah, I suppose that would have been best. Sorry".
Viper slithered closer to me and gently pulled me into a hug.
"It's okay Mike. I suppose it wasn't entirely your fault. After all, I sure we've all wanted to do that to him at some point".
I smiled...
"It's just unfortunate that it means you'll be fired".
...Only for it to vanish at once. Viper tightened the hug.
"Well, there's the chance that I won't. Yinshen is doing what she can to help out. And let's be honest. When has she ever let us down? ...After teaming up with us of course".
"Well, even so, just know that you have my full support, as well as Po and the rest of the five". She smiled weakly.
I just smiled back. I really can't go one week without something bad happening can I?
"Thanks Vipes".
I had to wait for at least half an hour before Superintendent Wu was moved from the barracks. The remains of the pie had been removed from his face and he looked... kind of fearful. I wasn't sure whether to feel happy for myself or sorry for him now. I guess at the least when this is all over I should try apologizing. I don't know if that would actually do any good, but I could just imagine Viper telling me to do it anyway, try to get rid of any bad blood between us. But, let's be honest. How likely is that going to happen? Apology or not, Wu will most likely still try to demand my execution or whatever punishment he has in store for me.
When Wu was out of sight, I made my move and slithered into the barracks, and into my room where I checked my personal items within the cupboard. Just my weapons, formal dark blue robe and that golden hat I never wore was all that sat inside. At least the stuff that belonged to me. On the shelf above were a few of Vipers things. Not that I chose to snoop around what with it being an invasion of privacy, even if we did share the same cupboard. Looking on the bright side, if I do happen to be fired, at least I won't have much to pack.
I quickly left the room, hoping to find Yinshen, see what it was she was planning to do in my defense. Last time I checked, she didn't seem to be carrying a lawyers degree. What if she accidentally ends up making things worse? Not that I don't trust her. Heck, I even took an arrow for her. But even so, whatever she has planned better work, for my sake.
When I did find her, she was up inside the hall of heroes with... Wu...
I almost gulped and slithered forwards, bracing myself for whatever Wu was probably going to yell at me. The guards did not seem to help either. All four of them were surrounding both Yinshen and Wu as though protecting them. Though if anything, I am kind of the one who needs protecting. Yinshen noticed my approach and allowed the guards to let me through to them. While Yinshen was happy to see me, Wu was most certainly not.
"There! There's the snake who assaulted me! Arrest him! Now"! He yelled, pointing at me, almost hitting my snout. The guards began to advance.
"Actually that won't be necessary".
With Yinshens command, they stood down again just as quick. Wu quickly spun round to her, with a look mixed with both livid anger and confusion. Even through his fur, I swear I could have seen a throbbing vein on his head.
"Mistress Yinshen! That snake attacked me! For what reason do you think he should be allowed to walk around freely"?!
"Well, if I recall correctly when I sent Master Shifu the scroll, it said that both I and you would be checking upon the newest member of the Jade palace. That means that we both have to make a joint decision together. Not to mention that the choices are made for the right reasons. That is unless you choose to go against the Gongmen council". Yinshen spoke calmly, acting as disciplined as she could with her arms behind her back. Though there was no hiding the small smile on her lips.
"Then I demand we fire him! At once"! The superintendent screeched, turning his rage on me once more. "He assaulted a high member of the Chinese government! Even you can't argue with that Mistress Yinshen"!
Yinshen's smile grew a little.
"Actually Superintendent, I'm afraid I can. Because what Master Mike did back in the barracks can not be claimed as assault".
Uh... it can't? Now I'm confused. How is shoving a pie into Wus face not considered assault?
"What are you talking about"?! Wu turned back to Yinshen. At this point, Po and the five had walked into the hall of heroes. Probably attracted to all the yelling. They just waited at the side, looking just as confused as I was. "Are you telling me that I imagined a pie thrown into my face"!?
"No. Because you ordered Mike to do it for you".
Huh?
Yinshen continued. "Back at the barracks, You ordered Master Mike to give you the pie. And he did. You never said anything about how it should have been given to you. So having it thrown in your face counts as an option seeing how "Give me that pie", as you claimed, can mean anything from placing it down in front of you, to what Mike did. However if you hadn't said it, then I would have had no choice but to arrest him at once. Therefore, Master Mike should not be punished.".
... Okay, I... think I follow that.
At this point, Wu looked ready to burst with anger. Everything that Yinshen had said made sense... more or less... and it seemed that there was nothing he could do about it. I wasn't sure whether to feel worried or ecstatic. After a few angry twitches and some near unintelligible swears, Wu had had enough and retreated through the back entrance of the hall of heroes to calm down. I guess this now means I'm off the hook?
"Uh"...
"You're welcome". Yinshen smirked before walking past me and up to Shifu and the rest. She allowed him to bow first.
"Many thanks Mistress Yinshen. We appreciate your aid".
Yinshen bowed back.
"Anytime Shifu. Anytime. Oh, and one more thing"...
"Yes"?
Before anyone could object, Yinshen quickly took one step forward past Shifu, pulled her leg back and aimed it straight at Mantis, kicking him with enough force to send him flying over to my position, sliding a couple of feet before stopping right in front of me. Everybody except myself was shocked at the sudden display of violence. Yinshen looked back to me and winked before leaving to go who knows where. I looked back down to Mantis, who was still lying on the floor, rubbing the back of his head in pain.
"What! Was that about"? He snapped. I smiled sheepishly.
"Yeaaahhhhh... I guess there's something I probably should have mentioned earlier"...
...
Hi guys, sorry this one's a little late. Had a bit of writers block and the fact that University work is starting to slowly pile up isn't helping either, so don't be surprised if some updates end up taking a week or more. With that said, Cheerio!