Chapter Ninety-Seven: What We Lack

Author's note: God, words can't explain how much I'm loving all you guys right now. Thank you sooo much for your messages of support and for your offers to glass window, I really appreciate it, and hopefully they'll get me going again. I don't think I'm going to be updating daily again quite yet, but hopefully this will tide you over for a while.

Brooke glanced uneasily behind her shoulder at the waiting cop car as she skipped up the stone steps to Nathan and Haley's house. Not bothering to knock, she unlocked the door and ran inside.

"Hello?" came a suspicious voice. Brooke froze as a woman entered the hall with Nina in tow.

"Who the hell are you?" demanded Brooke.

"I'm Heli MacDonald. I'm the nanny. Who are you and how'd you get in?" she asked.

"So you're not stealing my goddaughter? Good to hear. I'm the sister-in-law. Brooke Scott. Nice to meet you too," she said sarcastically.

"Oh. Sorry, Mrs. Scott. You look... different in person," she said, blushing.

"That's okay. Heli, right? Coming here just doesn't put me in the best of spirits anymore. How's our girl doing?" she asked, glancing upstairs.

"The same. I've barely seen her since I started here," she said.

"What, you've been alone with Nathan? Please don't tell me he's pulling a Jude Law," she said. Heli smiled.

"No, of course not. She's in her room," said Heli. Brooke smiled and ran up the stairs.

The air in the room was stifling. All the curtains were drawn, and the lights were off. She slowly approached the bed and sat down next to Haley's sleeping form.

"You awake?" she whispered loudly.

"Brooke?" she asked, rolling over. "Hey."

"I met your new nanny. Do we trust her?" asked Brooke.

"Not yet. But she's not going to hurt them. How are you? How's the outside world?" she asked.

"Lonely," said Brooke, slipping down onto the bed beside Haley.

"No one's keeping you company?" asked Haley sympathetically.

"There's no one to anymore. Peyton's in Europe and shows no intention of coming back. Davis hasn't talked to me in ages. Ryan's wrapped up in Jake. Literally, I think they're doing it," she said. Haley smiled.

"Well, someone should."

"Lucas and I haven't slept together in ages, I know. Poor baby, how's Nathan taking it?" asked Brooke.

"Obviously he's a lot less disturbed and sad by it all. He's more worried about me than he is sad about the..." Brooke frowned as Haley went pale and fell silent.

"Can you still..?"

"Yeah. Eventually. Someday. Probably with someone else," said Haley.

"As if. You seem to conveniantly forget sometimes that you're madly in love with him. He'd do anything for you, Haley. You're the only thing that he's ever cared about," she whispered.

Haley stared at her for a second, remembering everything she'd gone through with Brooke, everything she'd gone through without her. She reached forward and stroked her dark hair.

"You know, as much as I love Nathan... as much as I might love any man, someday, somewhere in the future, I know I'll never love anyone as much as I love you," said Haley.

Brooke leaned forward and kissed her friend's forehead. Haley's eyes slid close.

"Tell me a story, Brookie," she whispered.

"Do you remember the first grade?" she asked.

"I was there."

"I know. Peyton, Jake and Chris hadn't shown up. It was our best year ever. I got married to Dylan White on the playground," she said.

"I was your bridesmaid," said Haley, remembering with a smile.

"Yeah. I wore a God awful dress that I thought was gorgeous, and I had a boquet of dandelions. It was a big event. Even the second graders came," said Brooke, reminiscing with a smile.

"You were a big deal," said Haley.

"So were you. I remember everyone always fawned over you and Chris. And people thought you were more beautiful than me, even if I was more popular," she said.

"We were good at high school. Things didn't fall apart till afterward."

"Yeah." Haley took along pause, and for a moment Brooke thought she'd fallen asleep. "And they still haven't come back together yet."

After watching her best friend sleep for a time, Brooke wandered out. She reflected that Nathan's house, which had once seemed so cold to her, was now a second home.

She discovered her brother-in-law upon wandering in to the kitchen.

"Did she talk to you?" he asked. Brooke frowned, feeling traitorous.

"Yeah," she admitted.

"Well? Is she doing any better?" he asked expectantly.

Brooke scowled at him.

"She's just perfect," she muttered.

"Why are you mad at me? I'm trying to fix things, Brooke. Believe it or not, I'm not just some jerk with a hidden agenda. Haley's my wife. I want to help her," he said imploringly.

"Fine. She's miserable. She's a wreck. I don't think she's stopped crying since she got back. And I think she misses you, but I sure as hell don't understand why," yelled Brooke.

"Now why is bitch being a Brooke?" he asked, folding his arms.

Brooke pouted for a second.

"Lucas and I haven't done it in weeks," she admitted eventually.

"Okay, I don't think I needed to know that. But that can be fixed. Is that really the problem?" he asked.

"No. There's a lot of problems. We're just not too good with coping with them," she said.

"No one is," he said helpfully. She half smiled at him.

"Sorry I yelled. I just hate it when her life sucks. It kind of seems like her life always does," admitted Brooke.

"Thanks," he said sarcastically.

"I love him. I really do. I just don't know anymore if we were meant to be," said Brooke sadly.

"What, you believe in that crap? I don't," he said.

"Please. The first time you kissed Haley, you told her she was the one," she said.

"And it got her kissing me, didn't it?" he asked, winking. Brooke laughed and slapped his shoulder.

"No, seriously."

"I don't know. I think marriage is more about working for it than about destiny, some days," he said.

"It seemed so ideal. I was pregnant, he was in love with me. And we spent two years having kids and living our happily ever after," she said.

"Brooke, I'm not going to lie to you and say you'll get back there. But you will get to a better place. That I do know," he said.

Brooke leaned upward to peck his cheek.

"Thank you, BIL. Now I'm going home to my own man. Good luck with the nanny. Don't sleep with her," said Brooke sternly.

"You're quite the woman, Brooke Davis," he said warmly.

"Tscha. Brooke Scott, remember? I'll be seeing you, Nate," she said, walking out.

Nathan watched her go for a moment before running upstairs and trying to fix that which he still could not understand.