Disclaimer: I don't own it. It's a good thing I don't believe in Santa or I might have asked to own Harry Potter. I can just imagine it: "Why don't I own Harry Potter? I've been very good this year!"

Thanks to all my reviewers! Anonomus reviewers:

confusedegg: Turning Malfoy's hair red and gold is an awesome idea!

luckycharms445: She will punch Malfoy sooner or later. And I have no idea why Ginny thinks out loud all the time either. I wish I knew what's wrong with her.

Maddy: Don't worry. She'll punch Malfoy REALLY hard!

pinkprincess: Updating now.

This chapter uses some words that I think are totally American. I have no idea if they use them in England. I don't think they do. It's kinda hard to picture anyone from the Harry Potter books saying things like "whatever", "duh", and "dude". I'm sorry if they don't use those words in England. But you can't blame me. I'm an American. That makes my writing totally American too.

"I've got an idea," Lily said.

"What?" I asked.

"Who are you talking to, Gin?" asked Harry.

Damn. He's still here.

"Leave me alone."

"Why?" he asked.

"Because I want to wallow in my own self-pity."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Whatever."

Finally. He left. But not before I talked to the fairy godparents that he can't see while he was standing there.

Great. Now he probably thinks I'm crazy.

I probably am. Two dead people appear in my room, claiming to be my fairy godparents, when they're actually the parents of the most famous wizard in the world, and I'm the only one that can see or hear them.

If that's not crazy, I don't know what is.

"Here's what you do," Lily said. "You go to the ball looking raggedy and poor and dirty. And you don't have a mask. After a little while, you make up some excuse and leave. Then, we make you look rich and beautiful and give you a mask. Malfoy is shallow, he'll fall in love with the mysterious girl wearing a mask and look for her for the rest of his life. That will leave you free to marry Harry. And by the time Malfoy realizes that you're the mysterious girl, you'll be married."

Lily is a genius.

"I know I am," Lily said. "And you should really stop thinking out loud."

"Looks like James has been rubbing off on you."

"Shut up."

Oh shit! I have an hour until the ball starts!

"Just find the ugliest dress robes ever invented," Lily said.

The ugliest dress robes ever invented? Looks like I'll be paying a visit to my dear brother Ron.

Nah. I'm too lazy. He can come to me.

So I screamed again.

Ron and Harry came running in.

"What?" said Ron.

"Ron, remember those dress robes you needed for the Yule Ball in your fourth year?"

Harry started laughing at the memory.

"Shut up, Harry. What about them?"

"I need to wear them to the ball tonight."

Harry started crying, he was laughing so hard.

"What? Why?" asked Ron.

"I figure that if I look really ugly and poor, Malfoy won't want anything to do with me."

Harry went to Ron's room without a word, which was to be expected since he was still laughing so hard. He came back after a few seconds with the robe. He had finally stopped laughing.

"Here you go, Gin."

They left my room and I got dressed for the ball.

I'm proud to say that I looked horrible when I was done.

There is no way Malfoy could like me now!

The Ministry sent a carriage for me. It was orange. Why orange? Are they making fun of my hair? Because my hair is sort of a mixture of red and orange.

Someone is obviously making fun of me.

I got to the ball. I was a half an hour early, but the place was packed. It was filled with witches trying to win the heart of Harry, Malfoy, or both.

But if you listen to Lily, they both want me.

I feel so special.

Not.

Some dude asked me, "What's your name, miss?"

"Why?"

"So we can announce you, of course."

"Ginny Weasley."

"Full name, please."

I hate this guy.

"Ginerva Molly Weasley."

He turned and announced me.

Well, duh. Of course he announced you. That's why he wanted your name in the first place.

Who said that?

I'm your subconcous. Duh.

Great. Now my subconcous is mocking me.

Malfoy came running to meet me.

Then he stopped suddenly.

"Who the hell are you?" he asked.

"Now, now, ferret. Mind your language."

"You're not Ginny."

"I think I would know whether or not I'm Ginny."

"But you're ugly."

I knew I was. But you don't let your worst enemy get away with that kind of remark.

So I punched him.

Hard.

"OWWW!" he screamed.

That felt good.

"Have you learned your lesson now? Never call a girl ugly."

"But you are ugly!"

He just doesn't get it, does he?

I punched him again.

Harder.

Right in the middle of that face he's so proud of.

Blood started pouring from his nose.

And instead of screaming 'ow' like a normal person, he screamed, "MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!"

I couldn't resist ruining the hair he loves too.

So I took out my wand and turned his hair red and gold.

Gryffindor colors!

"See ya, Ferret-Face," I said.

I walked away and right into Harry.

Literally.

"Ow, my head," I said.

"What'd you do to Malfoy?"

"Punched him in the stomach, punched him in his face, and turned his hair red and gold."

Harry smiled. "Gryffindor colors!"

"Exactly. He should notice it any second now."

As soon as I said that, Malfoy screamed, "MY HAIR! MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!"

"I'm guessing he said the same thing about his face?" Harry said.

"Yep."

The music started. All the girls started running towards either Harry or Malfoy.

"Hey, Gin. Wanna dance with me?" Harry asked.

"Sure."

Most of the girls gave me dirty looks. I laughed and stuck my tongue out at them.

The song ended. The girls started running towards Harry again.

Harry took one look at them and said, "Hey, Gin. Wanna dance with me again?"

"Is Harry Potter scared of a bunch of girls?"

"Do you see how many of them there are?" he asked.

"Point taken."

The girls all gave me dirty looks again.

But during the song, some of them gave me even more dirty looks.

Why?

Because they heard what Harry said.

What did Harry say?

Well, during the song, Harry said to me, "Hey, Gin. I love you."

If you review, I'll update. That seems like a fair bargain to me.

-Jessi