A/N
Sango is my all time favorite female character in Inuyasha. I mean seriously, she's the best! Kikyou comes in second because she's just such a tragic, misunderstood character, followed closely by Kagome. Sango has just overcome so much. It kinda sickens me to see so many stories surrounding Kagome when Sango (Kikyou too) are such rich characters. Seriously. Not many people make it out alive and crawl out of their make-shift graves because of sheer will. Sango is the strongest girl in the entire series!
GO SANGO!
(coughs) Sorry had to get that off my chest.
Anyways, if you're a MirSan fan (heh I'm rhymed) you will definitely not like this chapter. Then again…why would you be reading a BanSan fic in the first place?
Ciao!
Reviewer Response/s:
wOlfgiRl15: Typically it takes me 1-2 weeks to update, unless I'm getting lots of homework and stuff. I swear my teacher's are out to get me; both my Art teacher and my L.A. teacher gave me projects over the break! Can you believe that? So I apologize for the long wait!
raven-999: Yeah, I totally agree! (laughs) But…it does make sense right? Even though technically he's what… (counts fingers) 32, Bankotsu still possesses the mind of a seventeen year old.
luckynumber3: Aww…thanks! I've wracked my brains for ideas and I think I'm doing good so far, it's great to know you like it!
Jill1209: Well, hopefully this chapter's better. Thanks for the compliment though.
Wolf Princess 2006: "Interesting!" I was SO going for that! Lol.
Bankotsu the Mercenary: I'm flattered really that you even considered asking me that. It's great to know you consider my story worthy enough to be added to your C2.
Nytingail-Samurai2: I'm glad to know you like it; hopefully you'll like this chapter as much as you liked my last one.
Sango's Counterpart: Don't be ashamed that you can't write a Bankotsu/Sango; to be honest I can't write a Sesshoumaru/Sango! I know pretty lame rite? Lol. Thanks for noticing my descriptiveness. I try my best but details aren't everything ya know? I try not to go over the top.
Kitty-Cat-13-7: Thanks for the compliment, I apologize for the wait!
Raven Shinobi: I don't really care for MirSan. He'll try once he's realized his mistake but in the end fail miserably.
Bellebelle3: Personally, I only like Bankotsu paired up with Sango. But I'm flattered to know you like my story. Again, I apologize for the long wait!
Warning: I apologize for any OOC' ness!
Disclaimer: There's no way I own Inuyasha. I do not make any profit from this. I'm simply using them for my own sick and twisted purposes.
'thought'
flashback or dream sequence
Beautiful
Chapter 3: Cycles
By: Youkai Hime90
Kagome smiles bright, bright like the sun and reassures Sango that happiness is within her reach, like a precious star in the sky waiting to be plucked. She is the epitome of light, glittering brightly as she offers Sango hope on a silver platter. The taijiya is alarmed by her unfamiliar brilliance and retreats into the shadows.
'You lie.'
Sango has died before, buried dead and cold in a make-shift grave in the courtyard of a false lord. And she knew once death claimed you, your soul stayed there, in that place where nightmares were real and dreams were dreams. Happiness was unattainable and as each day passed Sango felt the weight of her dead-brother's flaccid arms tighten and wind around her neck. With each stolen breath beyond the grave, Sango felt Kohaku dragging her down, down, down back into the earth where dirt clogged her nose and guilt clouded her soul.
That's why Sango could relate to the mercenary who felt winter in his veins where blood should be and a sharp, heavy blade slicing through the back of his neck. The two of them shared a unique understanding; there was certain darkness in death that one could never escape even in resurrection. For you see, it was never meant to be survived.
Bankotsu's chalcedony irises stared at Sango silently before his pursed lips gave way to a knowing smile. "So, you've died too," he breathed amusedly. "I suppose we're more alike than you thought, huh taijiya?"
Sango chose not to respond, gazing at the forest floor quietly. But Bankotsu would not take her silence as an answer. He gripped her chin gently forcing her to meet his gaze. She inhaled sharply, unsure of what to think of his close proximity. His warm breath wafted against her cheek and brushed against her flushed ear, causing her to shiver.
"You should consider joining me," he said thoughtfully, captivated by her mahogany eyes. "I'm the only one capable of truly understanding you Sango-chan."
She flinched, warm smiles and blue eyes flashing across her mind. Anger spiking Sango glared at Bankotsu. She didn't care if this man had spared her life as a child, no one was allowed to call her that except for Kagome. Noticing her reaction Bankotsu smiled, his darker side enjoying her pain.
"Hit a sore spot did I? I never did understand what you saw in that girl… I mean really, what exactly do you have in common with her, or the rest of them for that matter? Nothing. You should think about it," Bankotsu said, tapping her temple.
Sango jerked away from his touch, as if parched by fire. Her eyes were hard, voice edged with steel as she backed away from him. In the waning moonlight Sango glowed, shoulders squared, chin tilting up in defiance. "You're right. Kagome and I have nothing in common. But that's what draws me to her. That's why I want to be her friend. Maybe I'll become a better person because of it."
Sango spun around on her heel and made a move to leave when she felt Bankotsu's hand settle on her shoulder. Hesitantly, she met his gaze, cobalt eyes boring into hers. "It doesn't matter how much they want to help you, Sango. You know why? Because they'll never understand you." He'll never understand you..
Sango understood the hidden meaning behind his words.
And as Sango shuffled listlessly towards camp, the sun bathing the waking earth in golden sunlight she set out to prove Bankotsu wrong. His words unwillingly stayed with her and Sango pondered his last words.
"Till next time, slayer."
'Next time…?'
What made Bankotsu think there would be a next time Sango thought, slipping into camp like an elusive shadow. The hanyou was the first to greet her, grunting a good morning before brushing past her. His amber eyes had lingered on hers for a split second and Sango couldn't help but think he just knew where she had been last night. She didn't know whether to be relieved or horrified.
Sango was surprised to see Kagome up, bright and early. The miko brightened upon spotting her and called her over. Beaming, Kagome chirped "Good morning!"
"Good morning," Sango said, albeit a little uneasily. The taijiya was wary and settled on her knees properly.
Kagome looked over her shoulder at a slumbering Miroku before gazing back at Sango. She lowered her voice to a whisper. "You know, when you left in the middle of the night I was really worried about you."
Sango's heart clenched in her chest and suddenly she felt very guilty. "I'm sorry…I didn't mean to-"
Kagome shushed her, pressing a finger against the taijiya's lips. She smiled softly. "You had him worried too."
Understanding exactly what Kagome meant by "him" Sango felt a light blush dust her cheeks as she casted a wayward glance at the monk.
"R-really?"
"Really."
Perhaps, there was hope for them yet.
Sango loved Miroku, and she swore that she could see in his eyes, the beguiling smile that he loved her too. Perhaps that was why she had restrained herself from slapping him when she'd felt his hand slide down to the small of her back, only to curve around her waist. Sango's back had stiffened from his touch out of reflex, anticipating the movement of his hand. Time passed and Miroku's hand had not strayed and Sango had found herself staring at him questioningly. Miroku had merely avoided her gaze, chattering away happily with a semi-surprised miko. Kagome stole curious glances at the taijiya but chose to say nothing, a knowing smile curling her lips.
Sango blushed furiously.
"So, um do you really think the lord of this mansion will let us stay?" Kagome asked quietly as they walked along the lavished corridor. The place was huge. Anyone could tell that who ever owned it was definitely loaded.
Miroku nodded. "Positive. I saved the man's life after all so he is obliged to return the favor."
Inuyasha eyed the monk suspiciously. "You sure you aren't just gonna pull that same crap you always do every time we visit a village? The whole 'there's a dark, ominous cloud hovering over the area'?"
"Inuyasha, I thought you had more confidence in me!" Miroku cried dramatically, sparing him a mock hurt look his way. He flashed Sango a grin, causing her to flush even more.
Inuyasha remained unperturbed, ears flattening against his head. "Whatever you say, monk." He frowned as they approached the middle of the room, noticing that the number of women far outnumbered the men. By this time, Miroku had let his arms drop to his sides and had distanced himself from Sango, smiling cheerfully as he waved to some of them. The women in return sent him sultry glances and winked.
Inuyasha sweat dropped. 'Concubines. Damn, the monk's gonna have a field day.'
The hanyou noticed irritably the flirtatious looks the poorly clad women were sending his way as well. One of them had as much guile as to lip her lips invitingly, eyes roving over his body. He growled softly and they scattered like dust to the wind and Kagome glared at him.
"Oh wow," she said sarcastically, noticing everyone's eyes were focused solely on them. "Way to make a good first impression Inuyasha."
Meanwhile, Sango stared at Miroku in a mixture of silent hurt and disbelief.
"Not again. Damn it," Bankotsu mumbled to himself.
For a moment the mercenary merely stood there, too pissed to say anything else. The hand not holding his Banryuu clenched into a fist until his knuckles bled white. Rage hit him square in the chest and his gaze nearly bled red.
'Jakotsu. Suikotsu.'
It was just so hard to believe that they were really gone. He stepped over to where the bodies lay of his fallen comrades, nostrils flaring as he breathed in the smell of singed hair and burned flesh. More than likely they had been taken off guard. Suikotsu's face was open in a silent scream, eyes clenched shut tightly. The pain of being burned alive was evident in the doctor's face.
'Hell, at least he has a face.'
Jakotsu was barely recognizable, what with his normally laughing features being melted off and all. Bankotsu growled. He had taken the most damage, his flesh charred beyond the point of recognition.
"Are you serious Jakotsu?"
Jakotsu blinked and peered at his leader with a curious look on his features. "Why not? I mean, you're the one who said you wanted us to give you any shikon shards we come across right?"
A genuine grin flashed across Bankotsu's face and he nodded, showing off his newly found shard. Sunlight sparkled off of it and the leader of the Shichinin-tai felt tears roll down his cheeks. Bankotsu wrapped an arm around Jakotsu, who appeared mildly alarmed by the action.
"Aniki?" he questioned hesitantly, his eyes searching his.
Bankotsu grinned ear to ear and he squeezed Jakotsu in a bone-crushing, bear hug. Happiness shined brightly in his blue eyes and Jakotsu struggled to breathe. "You're the best!" he exclaimed, drawing back to smile at his friend. "I swear, you're the only one in the world I can trust, even if you are a little strange!"
Bankotsu's hands were dirty and he took a moment to step back and survey his work. Two mounds of dirt met his azure gaze. One served as a final resting place for his former companion Suikotsu and the other belonged to his longtime best friend Jakotsu. The task had been a grim one but he knew it had to be done. Pain shined in his eyes briefly for a moment before it was quickly suppressed, anger quickly taking its place.
'You better watch out Renkotsu. Because you're going down.'
At that moment he vowed he would have his revenge. The moment Bankotsu saw that damn traitor's face he wouldn't hesitate, he would make that bastard wish he'd never been resurrected. Bankotsu licked his lips and imagined impaling him with his Banryuu and let his imagination wander from there.
He gripped his halberd tightly. The need to kill something coursed through his veins and his blood lust drive increased ten fold at the sound of life. "Nothing a good slaughter won't cure," he assured himself softly, a grin flashing across his features.
Sango sat quietly away from the others, eyes downcast as she attempted to block out the light and cheery laughter of Miroku and the extremely pretty girl he currently sported on his arm. Sango frowned, brown eyes darting from one to the other. The monk noticed her stare and flashed a charming smile her way, blissfully oblivious of the mixed emotions simmering just beneath the taijiya's eyes.
'The nerve of him!' she thought, astounded by his ignorance. 'How can he do that? And right in front of me no less!' Sango's cheeks flushed a rosy hue as she lowered her eyes, picking at her food dejectedly. Her body stiffened at the sound of the monk's voice.
"Why so quiet?" Miroku inquired playfully. His blue eyes sparkled with a mischievous light as he raised a bottle of sake into the air. "There's plenty to go around! Right Chizuko?"
The daughter of the lord smiled sweetly at him and nodded, casting Sango a glance. She tightened her grip on Miroku's arm, which didn't go unnoticed by Sango.
"Miroku-sama who's she?" Chizuko asked sweetly, pointing at her blatantly.
He glanced back at the other girl and smiled. Sango's brow twitched and she resisted the urge to smack them both. She drummed her fingers angrily on the floor and imagined impaling the "sweet maiden" with her kantana when she wasn't looking. Oh, the look on her face would be priceless.
Sango barely cracked a smile. "The name's Sango."
'And in case you haven't noticed I'm sitting right here.'
Miroku laughed but Sango had a feeling that he was far from amused, more like trying to brush off the increasing awkward situation at hand.
"Well, the two of us certainly do have history…but enough about me. Did I ever tell you how beautiful your eyes are?"
Sango couldn't believe her ears. 'History..? Is that all I am to you…Houshi-sama?'
"Isn't this great?" Shippo exclaimed. Unaware of the demon slayer's misery he gaped at the platters of food set before him. The kitsune's mouth watered and his green eyes sparkled with delight. "FREE FOOD!" He reached out to grab a skewered fish and his hand was smacked away by a much larger one.
"Ow! Hey, that was mine!" Shippo screeched. He glared daggers at the hanyou who had stolen his food in what he was hoping would be a heart-stopping 'all fear me' kind of look. The effect was somewhat ruined when he stuck out his tongue.
"Heh, tough luck kid," Inuyasha snorted. Shippo pouted and whined, tugging insistently at Kagome's shirt.
"Kagome, he stole my fish!" The miko sighed quietly, shaking her head at the two.
"Inuyasha, why do you always have to antagonize Shippo? He's just a kid for kami's sake."
"It's not my fault he has bad reflexes! Maybe if you stopped babying him he'd grow up!" Inuyasha shot back angrily.
"I do not baby Shippo!"
"Yeah you do!"
"DO NOT!"
"Do too you dumb wench!"
"Inuyasha why do you always have to be such a jerk!" Kagome screamed, "Why can't you pick on someone your own size?"
"What the hell is that supposed to mean, stupid?" Inuyasha shouted to the woman sitting beside him, staring at her as if she'd grown two heads.
"It means…it means…sit boy!" Kagome replied, her anger instantly rising. She huffed as the spell sent the hanyou crashing into the floor, a triumphant gleam in her eyes. Once he had gotten back to his feet they were at it again. Inuyasha was determined to get in the last word no matter what.
"Wench, what you have to do that for?"
"SIT!"
Shippo, who had by this time lost interest in their squabble, waltzed over to where Kirara was. He gazed at Kagome and Inuyasha quietly, a perplexed expression on his youthful face. His tail bounced from side to side and Kirara mewed and batted it playfully.
"Sheesh. I wonder what they're fighting about," Shippo said.
After the fifth or sixth sit Inuyasha retreated with his tail between his legs and things finally started to calm down. Kagome sighed hopelessly. 'Why does he have to be so immature?' she thought irritably. Face afluster, Kagome turned to Sango for reassurance in her patience and love for her beloved, but oh, so stupid hanyou.
But, Sango seemed pre-occupied with something or rather someone. The miko followed the direction of her friend's gaze with her eyes and nearly gagged when they came to rest upon a blushing Chizuko chattering away happily with an equally enthusiastic Miroku. Kagome's lips quirked up into the beginnings of a frown.
'I can't believe it…he's flirting again! What a man-whore! He's so insensitive! Not to mention poor Sango! Oh kami, I can only imagine what this is doing to her..'
Kagome glanced at her friend and a look of concern washed over her face. Sincere sympathy swelled in her gentle heart for the older girl's plight and she noticed Sango hadn't eaten any of her food yet. It was probably cold by now. Kagome nudged her shoulder.
"Aren't you going to eat?"
Sango blinked. She could see the apprehension in Kagome's eyes, and she thought, from the miko's ready acceptance when she first buried her head in her lap and cried to the way she radiated such warmth showed how much like a mother Kagome really was.
Sango smiled. "Maybe later. I'm not really hungry right now."
She returned her attention to the matter at hand and her eyes widened like saucers. She knew she was being paranoid and ridiculous but…she could've sworn that there had been a gap before. Because she would've noticed most definitely if their bodies had been that close together. Maybe, she was going crazy. Nonetheless she glared.
Raising the chopstick clamped noodles to her lips she began to chew. Well, more like gnash her teeth. They seemed to be in deep conversation and Sango couldn't help but notice how casually Miroku's hand was draped over the girl's shoulder. She slurped the rest of her soup, keeping her eyes on them the entire time. Miroku said something and apparently it was absolutely hilarious because moments later the girl had broke into a fit of giggles. Sango's curiosity was peaked and her attention shifted to the girl.
Chizuko was pretty. Even Sango could admit that. No where near as radiant as Kagome-chan but she was far from ugly. She had long chestnut brown hair that cascaded past her shoulders in waves, and pale milky white skin.
'Un-marred at that.' Sango thought with a touch of admiration. Chizuko's hands were small and soft while Sango's were tough and calloused from training. Her dark green eyes radiated life and she was demure and delicate as a flower. She was the daughter of a wealthy lord and she was oh so naïve. Chizuko was everything she wasn't and that made Sango hate her even more.
"Miroku-sama!" Chizuko gushed girlishly, eyes sparkling, "You're terrible!" She laughed, before batting her eyelashes at him and glancing away. After a moment of much consideration the girl let out another overjoyed squeal. She threw her arms around him whole-heartedly. "But, of course I would!" she beamed.
Sango's heart skipped a beat.
"It would be an honor to bear your children Miroku-sama."
Sango froze, paralyzed by her words. Kagome glanced at her and felt uneasiness and worry tug at her heart strings insistently. She had seen Sango get upset before but never like this. The miko spared Miroku a glance and noticed the "uh oh I fucked up" look on his face. He gazed at Kagome who shot him an angry glare.
"Will…will you bear my child Sango? When we have defeated Naraku will you be mine?"
He held her hands in his and the taijiya blushed, glancing away into the sunset. Tears of happiness glimmered in the corner of her eyes and Sango was amazed by how easily one could be affected by a few simple words.
"Yes. I want to be with you…Houshi-sama."
Sango had gotten so good at pretending, she had managed to fool himself all the while. The lies she had kept repeating to herself, the wall of denial that she had built, had all finally come crumbling down. Sango's perfect little world instantly shattered and the resounding echo of Miroku's promise rung clearly in her mind, smarting like a sting. Sango's heart clenched painfully in her chest, as she struggled to her feet, her vision blurred from her tears. The world tipped and turned and without another word she dashed madly for the door.
The sound of her hand connecting with his cheek resounded loudly in the air, causing the birds of the forest to cry out and take flight to the sky in a flurry of wings. The shocked expression that flashed across his face as his mind slowly registered that she had slapped him further served to splinter and crack her heart.
"Houshi-sama!" Sango cried, choking through her sobs, "How could you?"
"Sango," Miroku said softly, and she stumbled, and he was all shining eyes and weak smiles. "Please, just listen to what I have to say-"
"No," Sango shook her head sadly at him, "I don't want to hear your excuses anymore. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of everything." Tears were streaming down her face and the taijiya could've cared less at that moment. She just wanted to get away.
"Sango, you know I love you," Miroku whispered, reaching for her. She glared at him, shoving his hands away from her.
"No, I don't Houshi. I don't know anything anymore. Y-you don't even act like we have a relationship," Sango whispered, covering her face. "Every time a pretty girl comes along…you act like I don't exist!"
Miroku tried again, smiling weakly. "That isn't true. Don't you remember? I asked you to bear my child-"
"Along with hundreds of other girls!" Sango cried, eyes dark as the fringe of a midnight storm. Her body shook and she struggled to control her sobbing, breathing heavily.
"I'm not serious when I ask them," Miroku countered defensively, "it's just-"
"You feel like less of a man if you're not flirting?" Sango demanded. "Is that it?"
Miroku said nothing. He didn't confirm her words nor did he deny them. In Sango's mind that could only mean she was right.
Sango bowed her head, her bangs shielding her eyes. She sighed. Not an overdramatic, fake sigh, but a real one. A tired sigh. Light and quiet. A single, luminous tear streamed down her cheek and hit the softened ground below. The air was crisp and she shivered. Glancing up at the heavens the sky looked ominous and dark, black clouds spreading through the sky like a cancerous mass.
It was raining.
'How symbolic.' Sango thought.
"Maybe, we really weren't meant for each other," she responded slowly, voice drawn out. Her voice sounded far away.
She turned around, clenching her eyes shut, not wanting to see him and perhaps, most of all not wanting him to see her. Suddenly, Sango felt very foolish. She took pride in always being strong, and always, always being in control. The tears wouldn't stop and she felt unnaturally tired. If she could, if she didn't have the blood of a proud youkai exterminator running through her veins than she would've already given up and gladly collapsed on the crimson earth and waited for the end. But she couldn't.
Sango curled her hands into fists. The image of deep blue eyes and sun kissed skin flashed across her mind.
"So, you've died too," he breathed amusedly. "I suppose we're more alike than you thought, huh taijiya?"
And Sango ran.
She bolted before he could say another word and by the time he had thought to call out to her she was already too far ahead for the monk's voice to reach her. For a moment, a pink and white phantom-trail lingered in the air, marking the path she had taken. Then, that faded as well.
Sango was gone.
Miroku merely stood there, cocooned in the embrace of the pretty, green forest and skirl of light birdsong. There was an empty feeling that carved out the inside of his soul and left him hollow. His blue eyes continued to stare straight ahead, as if his mind refused to believe she'd left, dark hair damp and clinging to his forehead and all he could think was...
'Where is she going?'