Aurora Whisperwind: Hey people! I just read 'The Hitokiri Stainmaster' by Angrybee! OMG! It had me laughing until I fainted on my keyboard, read it! It just has to be the funniest thing on the entire planet! On a different note, here is my 8th chap!
Disclaimer: I do not Rurouni Kenshin or the fairy tales. But I do own Saitoh's wolf form, Okita's fairy form, Yahiko's cat form, Sano's-
Saitoh Bloodlust: Shut up and let's get on with the story!
Aurora Whisperwind: Creep! How dare you talk back to me, you weird grey wolf with unhealthy habits and golden eyes! I've made you look good in this story!
Saitoh Bloodlust: You've made me look good because you had no choice, silly girl! (Smiles snidely revealing his Oh-so-dangerous fangs)
Aurora Whisperwind: Really……. Well how about I change the story a little and make you a flying purple hippo with a top hat whose special attack is blowing kisses at enemies?
Saitoh Bloodlust: Shudders violently and backs away, mumbling something.
Aurora Whisperwind: Good wolf… and oh, before I forget, the flying hippo belongs to Microsoft Games.
Saitoh Bloodlust: (Bursting out of his spell) what? You mean that thing is in the story?
'Beware the man with servants three… Hmm, if it is really him, what to do?' Saitoh mumbled, loud enough for Okita to hear. Okita didn't say anything. Saitoh jerked his head up, looking for him. 'Where did he go to?' Come to think of it, Okita hadn't bothered him at all since yesterday. He hadn't said anything insulting at all!
A few minutes later, Saitoh started to panic. 'Okita! Okita! Where the heck are you, you miserable fairy?' he whispered, looking wildly around him. He thought about what he had said the last evening, whether he had upset Okita in some way. 'I didn't say anything! I was too busy running away from that psychopathic nutcase!' Forget about it, he said to himself. Just forget about it, he'll come round soon. But he couldn't forget about it at all…
The dark forest was definitely getting stranger. "I feel like someone's watching us all the time"-whispered Kaoru looking nervously about her. "Yeah, I feel the same" agreed Misao. Sano and Yahiko were too busy fighting to agree. Just then, Saitoh stopped, looking very worried. "Hey what's wrong, wolfie?" inquired Sano. Saitoh said nothing and continued to search the tree tops. Finally, he spoke "I have to leave you for a while. You may go on if you wish or you may stay here. Do as you like" he bounded off. "What's with him?" Yahiko asked, scratching his head. "No idea. What do you think we should do? Should we go on?"-asked Misao. "Yes, we will. He can find us if he wants to" And thus decided, they moved on. Little did they know they were walking into the arms of mother Foolishness… and her sister, mother Danger. Ah, poor, poor, people.
Back to Saitoh- he was indeed in a sick mood. Stupid Okita. Maybe the nutter had fallen asleep and had been left behind in their camp. Saitoh sprinted to their camp site, easily distinguished by the recently dug pits to throw Kaoru's food. "Okita! Okita! Where are you? You'll pay for this your irresponsible creep!" Silence greeted his words. Saitoh seriously began to get worried. It was not like Okita to run off like that, not with the full moon so close…. He had not much time to ponder though. From far away came the yells of his companions. What were they yelling about now?
Kaoru, Sano, Yahiko and Misao were indeed in some predicament. For Saitoh had forgotten to give them the map (don't ask me how it was with him, ignore that part) and they only realized it quite late. And for the billionth time in this story, they were lost… Anyway, they realized this when a giant shape passed over them. Yahiko looked above him and was shocked to see a humungous, purple, top-hat wearing, flying Hippo. How it flew none knew, but now every one among them (And so, everyone reading this story) knew how rainbows were created. No, no, it's not because of light and raindrops acting as tiny prisms, no indeed. That was a fairy tale told to adolescents in high schools, to save them from the actual, horrifying reason.
The rainbows are created by the Hippo's. When they fly. From their butts. I'm sorry, you poor misled high school students. You have been deceived. Ah, yes, by the ones who called themselves your elders. But they had their own reasons, for the real reason would terrify those with tender tendons and delicate digestion. But the truth has to be unveiled. How long can we keep ourselves in ignorance?
"Ugh, what is that thing?" asked Yahiko, wrinkling his nose in disgust. The purple hippo looked at them. "Uh oh… why did you say that you moron?" Kaoru clamped her hand over Yahiko's mouth. The hippo straightened and swooped down to attack. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" they yelled and tried to run but the hippo blocked their way. It opened its mouth and-
Slash. Saitoh dug his claws into its skin. It yelped and backed away. "You saved us Saitoh! It was gonna eat us…" Sano said, while the others nodded. Saitoh looked at the hippo "Ugh, what is that thing?" the hippo looked at him. Its eyes watered. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH" it started to bawl as Saitoh stared in confusion. He looked at the others; but they offered him no clue. Finally Kaoru ventured– "Uh, okay, don't cry now… we didn't mean that. Um, wha- I mean, who are you?"
The hippo paused and spluttered out "Me Bulba. Bulba lost. Bulba hungry. Please help Bulba find mamma and papa. Bulba missing them…" its lip quivered again. Everyone's head reeled. This thing was a baby? This enormous creature? Sano was touched "Okay Bulba, we'll help you find your parents. So don't cry" The hippo looked gratified. "Yay! Bulba happy!"
They trooped off, leaving a disgruntled Saitoh. A thought struck him "Wait! Where are you idiots going? Do you have any idea of where we have to go?" they looked at him and laughed. "Saitoh, don't worry, we'll find this guy's home" Misao said, looking at him like he was a little cub who was skeptical. They walked all noon hunting for a horde of rainbows. Nothing. Bulba, on the other hand seemed extremely happy now. He chirped something joyfully and bounced around, bouncing everyone else with him. Saitoh walked along mournfully, now really sure that something had happened to Okita. But what could happen to a fairy? Then again, you couldn't tell in the dark forest.
He crashed into Kaoru who had stopped abruptly. "What? What's wrong?" he grumbled as he looked beyond her. There seemed to be something in the woods up ahead. Saitoh pushed past the others. "Who's that? Show yourself!" he snarled. A reedy voice piped up "Chuka, is that you?" A bear stepped out, wearing a Canadian flag as a cape. He was wearing some kind of pelt which a monkey on one side. They stared. "Ugh, what is that thing?" the bear said, pointing at Bulba. "We might ask you the same" chirped Sano, while Bulba's eyes welled up again.
"Watch the tongue, boy" commanded the bear "I'm the owner and king of this forest! I'm the indestructible Canadian bear! I live to fight evil!" Saitoh stepped in "Really! Then why is it dark? If you live to fight evil as you say, then why isn't this forest bright?" the bear looked sheepish "Well…… I was pretty poor, and I really couldn't afford fancy lighting. I thought the natural sunlight would do, but then these stupid trees grew and obstructed everything…." Everyone, including Saitoh sweat dropped a little.
"Okay then, do you know where the herd of flying purple Hippos live? We're taking this one back" Misao asked. The bear looked at her, surprised. "There's a whole herd of them? In my forest? I never knew. I was too busy searching for my other monkey, Chuka. By the way, meet this one, Luka" Everyone sweat dropped again. "Uh, Hi Luka!" chirped Kaoru. "Tell you what" the bear began "I'll join you. We'll find Chuka and this herd" he strode off, before anyone could complain. Misao hopped off behind him, adding to the others "Come on, if he's the owner of this forest, he'll know where everything is! He might be able to help us defeat the dragon and everything else!"
"She has a point you know" said Sano and they all followed her. Saitoh was extremely pissed now. 'No Okita and we're hunting flying purple hippos with a Canadian bear that's lost his monkey. This has to be the stupidest day ever!' he followed as well, making a resolve that he would definitely kill Okita if he was ever found again.
That's it! The story has turned a little insane now, don't you guys think? Anyways, the Canadian bear also belongs to Microsoft games. Tell me if I made any mistakes. And where's Okita?
To lolo popoki: You'll still have to wait for Saitoh's 'secret' as such! What do you think of this chappie? Pleasekeep reviewing! Love you!
To sueb262: Thank you for appreciating chap 6! This chap is rather stupid, I know….. Keep reviewing and thank you for your support!
To Rurouni-maxi: I'm glad you like Okita! Well here's the update! Review!
To phantom of blood: You changed your name! Anyway this one sounds cooler! Keep reviewing!
To animefreakgal456: Wow, you took long to review! I like your story a lot, too! Please keep reviewing!
Please review! I'll thank all of you!