Two days had passed. It was Christmas Eve, and Ren was not in the same spirits as the rest of the school. It didn't feel like Christmas. Not without her family, away from home, and being so depressed. She didn't anticipate the holidays with as much cheer this year. After what had happened with Audrey, Ren was avoiding her. She couldn't face her. Which was very confusing.
Surprisingly, Audrey didn't seem to mind the fact that she was a vampire, she even promised to keep it a secret; hope to die. But Ren was just so horridly awkward with the whole predicament, she didn't feel right. Her feelings had been released, normally she would have felt lighter than air, but that night she had cried so heavily that things seemed worse than better. She couldn't get the picture of Audrey's scared face out of her mind. It was crushing her, taking her into the hands of despair and ringing her out like a sponge.
She was aware Layla was feeling bad herself, but she lacked enough energy to even make herself feel batter, if she tried talking to Layla, she just chickened out. Neither of them could communicate very well, not anymore. Layla was spending more and more time a lone in the Room of Requirement. She seemed to have given up on a social life altogether. If she was hardly talking to Ren; Ren figured she was talking even less, or not at all to Skye. The only person she was talking to, seemed to be James, which really didn't surprise Ren too much.
In short, the two of them were depressed.
Ren didn't know how long it would take until the school found out about them. Secrets seemed to never be kept around Hogwarts, and this was no exception. And in true nature of this code of secrets, Ren figured she should tell Layla that Audrey knew. She felt rotten, and sick, but she needed to know.
"I need to talk to you." Ren said to Layla that evening at supper. She hadn't had anything to eat, nor did she want to. Really she was only there so she should stare longingly at Audrey from down the table. Resting her head on her folded arms, she didn't bother expecting a reply from Layla, instead she sighed as she watched Audrey laughing in good spirits.
"D'accord." said Layla quietly. "Allons-y."
"I thought you should know that I fucked it up." Ren said, leading Layla into their dormitory.
"What?"
"Everything." Ren sighed, sitting on her bed. Uncertainly, Layla sat down on hers, looking questionably to her sister. "We're here on limited time." Ren continued. Layla said nothing. Ren didn't want to say it; it was as though saying it made it worse. If she could only keep it to herself and her thoughts, things would be okay, even though they never would be. Taking a deep breath, she let the words slip through her lips. "Audrey found out about us."
"What!"
"I-It couldn't be helped." Ren stuttered, fear overcoming her.
"Of course it could have!" Layla snapped, clenching her fists in her lap. Ren could see just how angry she was. Layla's pale face was turning a deep red, and her fists were shaking, knuckles white.
"What was I supposed to do when she takes my flask and drinks from it?" Ren exclaimed angrily. She didn't like her sister being mad with her. But it was worse having her sister mad at Audrey. What was she supposed to do? Taking sides wouldn't work, but she subconsciously found herself siding with Audrey.
"Well I don't know, but how the fuck can you be sure she's trustworthy!" Layla spat back "What if she goes blabbing? We'll be kicked out, and who knows what."
"I know that!" Ren said angrily rolling her eyes "I trust her, she promised not to tell anyone."
"God damnit. That's what Jeff said." Layla muttered.
"What about Jeff?" Ren asked, her voice smoothing out.
"I said that's what Jeff said!"
"What do you mean?"
"Back in France... When Jeff and I were still dating..." Layla said, her voice becoming weak as her eyes filled with tears. "He... he cheated on me, and when I found out... I... I did something completely irrational and stupid."
"Wait... he cheated on you?" Ren asked, her mood softening, becoming completely sympathetic for her sister.
"Yes, with some slut a year older than us..."
"But why? I thought he loved you."
"He said he still did... but I knew he didn't..."
"But-"
"So I bit him."
"What!"
"I bit him." Layla said nodding, wiping a tear away. "I was just so overcome with passion and hate and love and... I didn't know what I was doing. I almost killed him."
"But you didn't..."
"No... I turned him to save his life... But then when he regained his strength he and I fought again, and he threatened to tell everyone what happened."
"Was that the week before classes were out?" Layla nodded again. "I remember that... But you never told me why you were fighting."
"That's why."
Silence consumed the two, and it seemed as though a bottle of hate had been broken inside her. Sharp pains hit her hard in the stomach, leaving her with a nauseous feeling in addition to the anger that was forming in her mind. Clenching her hands into tight fists, Ren remained seated, even though every part of her body was screaming at her to inflict pain. Her mind flashed a fantasy of her tackling Layla and beating the shit out of her. But through it all, she remained seated, fists quaking, and face red with rage. She knew she couldn't hit Layla. They weren't children anymore, and she must handle this like an adult. Any responsible adult would know not to do anything drastic. At the same time she wanted to revert back to the inner child that would always remain in her. All the pain inflicted upon the two, because of the death of their mother, was all because of the one person she had left in the world. The one person she couldn't live without, her only known relative, the only person she had to give and receive love, it was because of her their lives had been ruined. Tears of rage welled up in her eyes, driving Ren to stand up, looming over Layla. Stomping her foot and punching the air as an alternative, she stormed out of the room, Layla remained unharmed.
"What's wrong?" Audrey inquired upon Ren's exasperated face.
"Layla." Ren replied shortly. "She... just- never mind."
"Well, if you insist." Audrey replied, shrugging it off. "Anyway, it's getting late, and Christmas is tomorrow... I'm going to bed."
"'Night..." As soon as the words escaped her lips and Audrey walked off for the dormitories, Ren wished desperately she had actually told Audrey what had happened.
After brooding until shortly after midnight, Ren finally sulked off to bed.
Waking up the following morning, the first thing Ren noticed was a small pile of packages at the foot of her bed. One box was long and slender, a few smaller boxes sitting on top.
Looking around, she saw that Layla had already departed, leaving fragments of packaging and wrapping paper about the room. Her gifts were in a petite heap on her bed. A Dragon Hide guitar strap, a new silver flask, and some cashmere socks; all given to her by Ren. Aide from that, Ren saw a few books and assorted items; probably from Skye, and James.
Back to her own pile, a sinking feeling reached her stomach as she sat down alone to open her gifts. The first was a package of holiday Chocolate Frogs, followed by a gag gift- handcuffs. Ren grinned mournfully at this, Layla always liked to give Ren a gag gift. The third she opened was a small jewelry box, and upon opening it, she saw a fine silver, heart shaped locket. Inside there was a small note.
Ren,
Your sister, Layla, helped me out with this one, so don't give me the credit for this. Hope you like it, and have a Happy Christmas!
Love,
Audrey
The last two words stuck out at Ren like a pin sticking into one's skin. It was painful to see, but she couldn't help stare. Ren immediately put it on, sighing deeply. Seeing she had two other gifts left, she opened the smallest first; she always saved the biggest for last. Inside the small package, there was a copy of Ren's favorite book Les Misérables, seeing this was from Audrey as well, Ren grinned; placing it delicately onto her bed. She knew Layla had probably suggested this too, since her own copy was falling apart, but it was still a nice gesture. Finally, she opened the last box. Ren gasped as she yanked the lid off. Inside sat the latest Cleansweep model on the market. She had always wanted a broom of her own, but she had never gotten one, and here Layla had gone out of her way to buy the best for her. A pain struck Ren's heart as she realized how much money Layla had spent on her, and Ren had only gotten her simple, and easy gifts.
"Why so apathetic?" Audrey asked late that evening. "Be happy."
"It's a little hard to be happy." Ren replied softly. "Christmas or not."
"That's so depressing."
"Sorry."
"Come on." Audrey replied brightly, tying to lighten the mood. "What's wrong?"
"It'd be easier if you were to ask what wasn't wrong."
"You'd feel better if you told me."
"There's a lot of things." Ren was looking away. She didn't want this to happen. She just wanted to be held, like a few days ago. It seemed like eons when she had last been in Audrey's arms, and she needed the warm feeling once more. Looking away, Ren bit her lip, forcing herself not to think about anything.
She felt the tips of Audrey's fingers sliding over her jaw line, turning Ren to face her. Ren hated that. No. She hated when Audrey pulled away. Not the feeling of her fingers against her cheek. "Tell me." she ordered softly. Tears welled up in Ren's eyes as she forced herself to look into Audrey's eyes.
"I never told you..." Ren sighed "but my mother is dead. Christmas isn't the same without her."
"You could have told me that." Audrey said, seeming slightly angry Ren hadn't opened up before.
"She was killed by vampire slayers." Ren continued, half ignoring Audrey. "I hardly remember my father. I only remember him from when I was small. Home in Romania. Then I just remember going to France and he wasn't there."
"Didn't your mother tell you what happened to him?"
"No." Ren said shaking her head, silent tears now streaming down her face. "She always told me I was too little to understand, or that it wasn't the right time. Now I'll never know."
"That's horrible." Audrey said, sympathetic and disgusted. Red refrained from a reply. She didn't know what to say. She never knew what to say anymore. She felt stupid, and small. Like what she wanted to say was inappropriate and didn't matter. She didn't want to sound childish or greedy, even though she knew she was being like that. "I thought you said there were a lot of things." Audrey said softly, breaking the silence. Ren looked to Audrey in a slight panic. Beginning to shake, she opened and closed her mouth, uncertain of what to do. "There's something else on your mind." she said logically.
Ren paused before she spoke, taking in a deep breath of courage.
"You."
"Me?" Audrey looked confused.
"You."
"What about me?"
"I didn't get what I wanted for Christmas." continued Ren.
"Hold on, now you're jumping around."
"No. I'm not." Ren said "I didn't get what I wanted for Christmas."
"Well, what's that?"
"You-" Ren paused, unable to quite comprehend why she was saying these things. "I wanted you. To hold your hand..." Ren wasn't looking at her, but by the tone in her voice, Audrey was flattered and shocked. Better than appalled and shocked.
"You could have told me that before now." Audrey told her.
"I'm going to bed." Ren stated. Trying, and failing, at ignoring what Audrey had just said. She was halfway up the stairs when Ren realized Audrey was following her. "Why are you trailing after me?" Ren asked, stopping and turning to face Audrey.
"It's Christmas." Audrey said, putting her hands on Ren's shoulders. "I don't want you to be sad; I want to make you feel better." Blushing at the sign of compassions, Ren seemed to have calmed down. However, she turned around and continued storming up the stairs.
Fully aware that Audrey was standing silently by the door to the Fifth Year dormitory; Ren kicked off her shoes, and slid into bed fully clothed. "Are you going to stand there all night?" She asked Audrey, who was staring at her in a daze.
"I don't plan to."
Ren felt uncomfortable. There she was, sitting up in her bed, her sister asleep only a few feet away in a different bed. Audrey was walking smoothly over to her, taking a seat on the edge of her bed. They had to be quiet; Ren didn't want Layla waking up to the two of them sitting on Ren's bed. How bad would that look? It was just a good thing Layla was the only other Fifth Year there over break. "So why are you still here?" Ren questioned, putting off her false show of anger, asking purely out of innocence and curiosity now.
"I already said." Audrey replied "I want to make things better for you." And there it was. Audrey was leaning into her, pulling her into a warm embrace. It took her a moment for the current situation to sink in, before Ren willingly leaned into her. Wrapping her arms around Audrey, she pulled her onto the bed closer to her.
Pulling away, Audrey took hold of Ren's hand, lacing their fingers together. "How's that?" she asked softly, her face only an inch away from Ren's.
"Don't leave me." Ren replied desperately, clutching to Audrey once more.
"I won't if you don't want me to."
"I don't." she whispered, pulling the curtains around her bed, and the covers over them. Situating herself between the pillows and Audrey and the covers, the warm safe feeling that seemed to pulse from Audrey encompassed Ren, and a wave of fatigue overtook her into a somber and relaxing sleep.