AN: A fic for Saint Patrick's Day! Let's see what happens when all the Irish characters in the Harry Potter series get invited to Riddle Mansion, and meet the house keepers!

'My Lord, might I ask why you feel it necessary to host an all Irish Party, when you yourself are not Irish?'

The Dork Lord cocked a bald 'eyebrow' at Wormtail.

'I'll have you know that in my extended family, I have many Irish links! My grandmothers' cousin lives in Belfast, my grandfathers', brothers', mother-in-law lives in Dublin, and three of my twelve mystery children live with my unknown brother in a shack in some woods…and you tell me that I have no Irish blood? How very dare you!'

The Dork Lord Voldemort turned back towards his guests; the Irish National Quidditch Team, Seamus Finnigan and a currently incapacitated Mad-Eye Moody.

'I apologize…now, where were we?' Voldemort grinned evilly.

'Er…you were telling us about your china.'

'Yes it's simply wonderful isn't it?' Eight of the nine guests stared in horror at the shockingly pink cups and saucers, whilst they were each perched on multi-coloured bean bags.

'Lucius bought it from a street vender in Knockturn Alley, apparently they poisoned the drinks they held, and killed their last owner.'

Seamus automatically spat his hot chocolate back into the container, whilst the Quidditch team merely kept a steely grin plastered on each of their faces.

'Drink up!' Voldemort tilted the blindingly pink cup, and drank, one little finger pointing out. The guests stared in horror.

'Sooo…love the seating arrangements…'

Voldemort flashed a dazzling grin that spoke of too much bleaching before answering, 'Why yes, young Seamus. The poufs are rather comfy…plus, they work wonders when you've had a hard day sitting on Big Daddy…'

'S'cuse me. Big Daddy?' questioned Troy uncertainly.

'Ah, my chair…'

'Yes, he has a special chair, because he's a special boy.' Lucius walked over to Voldemort, standing by his side, trying to look 'tough', but really only serving to add to the confusion in this story as to whether they are a couple or not.

'Right…Sooo,'

'Look, we really don't mean to be rude, but why are we here? We have a Quidditch match in checks watch 5 minutes.'

'Yes…I know all.' insert fancy, weird hand gesture here

'Eh?' Lynch shuffled closer to Quigley, who was sliding as far away from Voldemort as possible.

'I know all...' Still receiving blank looks, Voldemort aborted the 'Godly' image he had been striving for.

'Look kids, I know you have a match, and that today is Saint Patrick's' Day, I just thought that you might like to win this match…make it memorable?'

The Quidditch team exchanged glances, whilst Seamus, realizing that this conversation had nothing more to do with, had turned to prodding Moody repeatedly.

'And how do we win?' Asked Troy.

Voldemort snapped his thin fingers, and Wormtail disappeared into the Hall.

'You make an agreement with me, and I give you a potion…'

'What sort of agreement?'

'Oh…well' Voldemort sighed, 'You give me your freedom in exchange for a winning streak of 20 matches…'

Mullet (by name, Mullet by nature) leapt out of his bean bag and yelled, 'Sure! Don't have any freedom anyway, I always have to do what Connolly says…'

'Like hell you do! It's Troy who always bosses us around.'

As Troy stood up to join the argument, a silver snake cane made contact with Connolly's head, causing him to fall to the floor unconscious.

'There's a good girl…Fluffy,' whispered Lucius, stroking the cane and ignoring the body lying at his feet. Voldemort turned his attention to Moran. 'What I'm proposing is that your team becomes Death Eaters and does my evil bidding.'

'Whatever…as long as there's free food involved, I'll work for anyone…'

'Brilliant.' Voldemort paused, 'Wormtail? Where is our Potions Master?'

What sounded like a minor fight erupted in the hall. 'He's – he's coming my Lord.'

'People, meet my Potions Master, spy and current cleaner, Severus Snape.'

From around the corner of the door, came a sallow faced man wearing a light pink apron over a black frock coat and pants. The scowl on his face looked as if it had been driven home with a mallet, whilst one arm held Wormtail a head look, the other was clenched firmly around his wand. The man inclined his head towards his guests, snarling at Seamus, who had now prodded Moody into consciousness, and was proceeding to braid his hair.

'Severus, please show them the potion, and release Wormtail!' Severus complied.

'Do we have a deal then Mr Moran?'

The young man looked towards his team, then to the auror and the pupil, and finally to Snape, Malfoy, Wormtail and the Dork Lord. Could they really learn to live alongside these freaks who drank from killer cups and lived in a Mansion devoid of any colour sense and modern style? And could they learn to accept that they would be living with a man far too attached to his cane than was normal?

He smiled slightly at Voldemort, extending a hand, 'I think we have a deal.'

----------

AN: Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Reviews are always welcome!

Also, on another note, Deepshadows2 is gonna have her own B-day fic posted soon. If you like Snape, you'll love it!