"I really hate Potter."
"Haven't you always?"
"Yes, but now it's serious."
"What happened this time? Are you blaming him for your detention or something?"
"It is his fault!"
"Did he even talk to you during class?"
"No, but so what? He did it and I hate him for it and now Professor Snape is going to molest me again!"
"Oh, Draco... can you drop that already?"
"You don't believe me? Well maybe I should just go over to the head table and tell him I love him, then you can see what he does."
"He'll probably admit you to St. Mungo's."
"No, I bet that there's an eighty percent chance of him giving me a look of absolute joy and then kissing me right here in the Great Hall."
"Um... Draco?"
"What?"
"It's nothing personal or anything, but do you fancy Snape?"
"God, no! That's revolting! He fancies me, damn it! Why don't you trust me on this?"
"Well... you can be quite untrustworthy."
"And remember what we said before about Snape? The three things he'd never be?"
"Yes, but--"
"So we basically think you're going crazy at the moment. I don't know why you're saying these things about the poor Professor."
"Poor Professor? Let me fix that stupid thing you made up about him, alright? Snape is at least half gay, he's obviously pedophiliac because I am underage, and he loves me and said I was cute and wants everything to do with me."
"My god..."
"What's so funny? I'm bloody serious!"
"Draco, you have got to be kidding us!"
"I'm not!"
"Can you please just stop this act already? It's getting to be kind of gross."
"I'm not acting! I'm not, I'm not, I'm not! I hate you guys!"
"Hey, um, Malfoy? I need to ask you about today in Potions."
"Go wank yourself off, Potter!"
"...What? I only need to ask you why you said it was my fault. I didn't even do anything!"
"Didn't you hear me? Just leave me alone! I'm very angry right now!"
"At me?"
"When am I not? Just GO!"
"Fine, you pompous git!"
"Oh, that was a good one, Scarhead!"
"Draco, he already left."
"And you think that I didn't notice?"
"Alright... whatever."
"Well, thanks to him, I should go and get ready for the bloody sexual abuse now."
"Don't roll your eyes at me, you sorry excuses for friends! I'm leaving!"
"..."
"Good thing, too... I was getting a headache, how about you guys?"