I'M SO SORRY. IM BACK. this chapter was an ongoing disaster. it gets pretty intense sometimes, and fair warning there are one or two racial slurs. I don't like using them, but it had to be used to escalate a certain part.

also, i hope you're happy with the length. this chapter got to 9000+ words. so maybe its worth the wait huh?

ENJOY

Pointing Fingers

As much as Daryl hated it, it was how it had to be. He hated how crowded and smelly the RV had become, but he would manage. He would stay and ride in it with everyone else.

Usually, the Georgian winter wouldn't be so bad that he couldn't ride his bike, but he had a feeling, and after seeing how hard the first snow fell, he knew it wouldn't be the only time.

The snow was gone, but Daryl stayed in the RV because the bike had run out of gas. They had some gas cans left, so technically he could fill his tank. But the winter caused everything to freeze up so bad they couldn't siphon gas. Things had started to thaw, though Daryl didn't want to waste fuel on an extra vehicle, he'd wait until they could collect more. So it stayed on the trailer.

He wouldn't have to wait long, they were driving into a town, a small town, but still. He would find plenty of cars to take gas from, the group would fill up all their empty cans. And hopefully, fill their bags with food.

"I forgot I had it," Carl was talking to Toby. Both kids were sitting in the booth across from him. "I just found it in my bag, remember? We found it in that room, the estates with all the houses."

Toby stared out the window silently.

Daryl looked at her closely. Her face wasn't the void of emotion she usually tried to put up. She was frowning, possibly almost pouting. It was obvious she was too distracted to keep it up, she must not have noticed how she looked.

Daryl didn't think she looked upset, maybe bothered or . . . he struggled with it, maybe if she was looking at him he could tell.

Carl was holding a small book, it had a yellow cover, and Daryl thought he could see a small red house on it.

"We're both sick of the comics, so it's something until we find more. But it's really good, I had to read it for school. I thought I'd hate it, but I really liked it."

While riding in the RV, Daryl noticed that Carl talked more to Toby than anyone else. He talked to everyone just fine, he wasn't very quiet most days, but the quantity of speaking increased with Toby. Almost as if he was making up for everything she wouldn't say. All of his words were like projectile vomit, and it didn't seem to know when to stop.

"We could start later after we search, before we sleep. Or-"

"-Please." Toby's voice sounded pleading, quiet and gentle. "Stop."

Carl stared at her, looking disappointed, but she continued to stare out the window.

Not too long after, the RV stopped.

"Walkers ahead," Rick informed.

Daryl stood, making his way to look out the windshield, "how many?"

"Ten?" T-Dog guessed, trying to count the corpses. "Fourteen. That's what I see anyway, we make noise taking them out who knows how many will show up."

"So what's the plan?" Tyreese asked.

"We don't know the area," Rick considered, "We don't know who or what is here. We should take them out as quietly as possible."

"That's a bit much to sneak up on," Tyreese said.

"We'll be spotted sure, but it's better than opening fire. Who knows how many are even in the next street over. We need to be practical about this."

Daryl inspected the area, coming up with different tactics in his head, "Lori and the kids will stay here."

Rick nodded, "without a doubt. Things go bad we'll pull out our guns, they do the same and cover us."

"You want the kids shooting Walkers within a few feet of us?" Sasha raised an eyebrow.

"If this goes bad, it's better than nothing," Rick said.

"So, six of us, over a dozen of them," Daryl remarked. "We start out quiet and slow we can prob'ly take 'em."

"Five," Rick corrected. "I want someone on top of the RV, an extra pair of eyes on our backs and to protect Lori and the kids."

"And who's that gonna be?" Daryl questioned.

Rick considered, "Guillermo."

Daryl shook his head, "whoever's up there is gonna need a gun."

"G doesn't use guns." T-Dog reminded Rick.

"He's going to have to at some point," Rick sighed, craning his head around, trying to spot Guillermo on the couch. "Gui-"

"-I will not." Guillermo interrupted, having been listening to the conversation.

"I'll stay," Sasha volunteered. "I'm not a bad shot and G can use my shovel, he'll be good to have out there."

Rick hoped she was right. Guillermo proved himself to be a good fight, at times. There were times over the winter he'd freeze up and someone came to his rescue. Guillermo had a tendency to get lost in his head, which was understandable, he'd been through a lot of trauma. But when he was capable, he was dedicated and helpful. Rick hoped he'd stay focused.

"Are you okay with this, G?"

"Yes," he answered from the couch.

"Alright, then."

As Sasha stayed on top of the RV, keeping an eye out, Lori and the kids sat on the bed at the back of the RV.

"Should it be taking this long?" Carl asked his mother.

Lori stroked his head, "they're just being careful." She tried to hide it, but she was becoming worried as well, it had to have been about an hour since they left. Lori bit her lip and stood up, opening the curtain to take a look out the front windshield.

"Stay there," she told them. Lori stayed with the kids in the back to keep them from the windows, she didn't want them seeing if something went wrong.

Lori peered out the windshield. She saw two Walkers very far away, just stumbling around, and a few dead ones lying in the streets. But she didn't see anyone else.

"What's going on? Are they coming back?" Carl called from the bed.

"I don't know, I don't see them." She kept searching around, looking for any sign of them. Hearing footsteps behind her, she spun around, spotting Carl leaving the back room.

"Carl, get back, away from the windows."

Carl threw his arms up, "but why? I want to know what's going on."

"She don't want us seein' 'em get eaten," Toby said plainly, her face expressionless. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching the two of them.

"No," Lori said quickly. "They're fine."

"Ya just don't want us seein' 'em get torn apart. Like we didn't already see Dale's guts pulled outta him."

"Toby!" Lori was appalled, not believing what she just heard. "That's enough."

"They're prob'ly a'ready dead," she went on.

"They're not! Everyone will be back soon." Lori furrowed her eyebrows at the young girl. Toby was known to be blunt, blurting things out she shouldn't say. Usually, it seemed she was clueless about what she would say. For example, she thought to call her mother a whore was normal and nothing to react about. But what she was saying, the way she maintained eye contact, she knew exactly what she was saying.

"Not everyone."

"Why are you saying that?" Lori stepped away from the front seat, going closer to the kids.

"'Cause no ones died in a while."

Lori lashed her hand out, pointing at her in warning, "stop, that's enough!"

"Thought we were gonna starve ta death but instead of findin' food for us we just go and feed the Walkers."

Lori briefly glanced at Carl, who was shifting his eyes between them both, he looked worried and confused. "Knock it off, you're scaring Carl."

"He's thinkin' the same damn thing!" Toby's voice raised a bit, Lori couldn't make out why she was saying this. "We kids got awesome imaginations. Stop being a stupid bitch."

Smug. Lori detected it briefly, it shone through her eyes as she tilted her head, she was trying to be smug. But why? Was she trying to get a rise out of her? But why now?

"Toby, we don't use that word!"

"I just did."

What was with her? The girl went from not saying a word to the woman to openly insulting her and acting out.

"You're being-" Lori cut herself off, trying to breathe and keep calm. "I'm sure everyone's fine. I'm going outside, I'll see if Sasha saw where they went. Stay away from the windows, I mean it."

Lori opened the door and stepped outside, taking in the fresh air. She looked around cautiously, seeing only a few Walkers in the distance. They hadn't seemed to notice her yet.

"Hey," Sasha spoke softly, not whispering but keeping her voice low. She leaned over the side of the RV to look at Lori. "You alright?"

She nodded.

"What do you think that was about?" Sasha quirked an eyebrow.

"Huh?"

"The window up here, from the bathroom, it's open."

"Oh."

"I don't think I've ever heard her talk that much."

Lori feigned a laugh, "I don't know if I have either. Where is everyone? I don't see them."

"Oh, yeah. Rick motioned to a house and they all went in, I guess they're scavenging already. Maybe they thought it was better to just get started. Sun's going down."

"Maybe they didn't want the kids tagging along this time," Lori thought out loud. "Lord knows Carl will put up a fight if we try to keep him from helping."

Sasha made her way down the ladder to join Lori. "To be honest, I don't know if I'll get used to kids carrying guns. It bothers me, but it's necessary. And from what I've seen Carl is a good shot, he's responsible. So we don't have to worry about him."

Lori examined Sasha's expression, waiting to see if she'd continue. "And Toby?"

"She seems responsible," Sasha spoke hesitantly.

"You don't sound sure."

"I know . . . I know about Shane. Rick told Ty. How he, well, you know . . . then she tried shooting Rick. Ty told me."

Lori's eyes widened, she took a moment to take in this information. "I can't believe he told him. He won't talk about it, actually, he won't talk about anything with me."

"They've gotten close. My brother and him. I don't think Toby would hurt anyone, sounds like things were really messed up before we met you. Kids shouldn't be going through any of this, starving, people dying, seeing the dead walk? It's impossible to know what's going on in their head."

"I wish I could just cover their eyes so they won't know."

"Then they wouldn't be prepared, that's even more dangerous."

"I know."

They watched and waited in silence, listening to the distant sound of Walkers dragging their feet.

"That hat she wears . . ." Sasha said, she'd been wanting to ask but could never bring it up before. "Was it really his?"

Lori nodded. "I hate it. I wish she'd take it off."

Not too long after, the men emerged from a house down the street. Lori was back in the RV, sitting in the driver's seat when she saw them.

"They're back," she smiled at the kids, heading to the door, Carl was right behind her. "We were getting worried," Lori said when the men returned.

"We checked out a few houses," Rick avoided eye contact with Lori, as usual.

"Sasha mentioned, but I thought you were clearing the way and coming back."

"T was too busy hallucinatin'," Daryl sounded annoyed.

"Shut up, man," T-Dog shoved passed him.

Lori looked back at Rick, waiting for an explanation.

Rick sighed, "T thought he saw someone in the window, so we checked the house. Didn't find anyone, just to be sure we checked the backyard and the house next door."

"He's sure he saw someone?"

"Yes, but we didn't find anyone. And it didn't seem like anyone had been there recently."

"So what's the plan now?" Sasha asked, walking up from behind Lori. She looked at her brother, asking quietly; "you good?"

Tyreese gave her a thumbs up.

"I'm going to have everyone on house duty. We'll split up into groups and search around while we still have daylight. We never know what's coming next so I don't want to waste today. Then we'll pick a place to hunker down for tonight, move on to the next street tomorrow and take it from there."

Carl gave Rick a hug before going over to the others.

Lori reached out her hand to Rick when he turned away, "Rick, wait."

Rick turned back to her, sidestepping so her hand would come off his arm, "Are you feeling well enough for this?"

The question caught her off guard, "I'm alright."

Rick nodded, "I'd rather you and the kids stay behind but then we have to spare someone to stay with you, and I don't like losing that pair of hands. I think it's safer if you're with a group this time."

"Whatever you think is best. I wanted to talk to you."

"What about?"

Toby hadn't come out of the RV yet. "It's Toby. There was a small incident while you were gone."

"What kind of incident?"

"She got . . . nasty. She called me a bitch and kept going on about how you were probably dead, that someone was going to die. She wouldn't stop. She was scaring Carl."

Rick raised an eyebrow, "well, we're fine. She was just worried."

"That's not the point. Rick, it almost scared me a bit. The way she was saying it . . . like she wanted it to happen, or she didn't care."

"I'm sure that's not it."

"Maybe not but . . ."

"But what?" Rick suddenly looked a little frustrated. "What do you want me to do, Lori?"

"I-I just-"

"-You want me to yell at her?"

"I don't know! Maybe not you, I didn't know what to do."

"So you want me to go tell Daryl to yell at her?"

"No! Maybe talk to him-"

"-Then what? Put her on a time out? She's a kid. They've been watching people we know die and come back as Walkers. We've been traveling in this RV for months, trapped in by the weather for weeks. We've had to give everyone, even them, less and less food every day to preserve rations. Everyone is scared and tired, frustrated and hungry. Honestly, it would worry me more if the kids didn't throw some kind of fit."

Lori only blinked, unsure how to respond. But she didn't need to, because Rick walked away. As she watched him go, Daryl passed him walking in the opposite direction and toward her.

"Where's the kid?"

Lori heard Rick mumble an answer, but didn't hear what it was. Daryl went up to her next, pointing to the RV, "she inside?"

Lori pressed her lips together and nodded.

"Somethin' up?" Daryl asked. He was examining her expression, looking suspicious. She considered for a moment before shaking her head, stepping aside so he could easily go into the RV. Daryl's eyes lingered on her before going inside.

"Girl, let's go! House duty."

"No." Daryl turned toward her voice. She was sitting on the bed, flipping through a comic book.

"What'd'ya mean no?"

"Ain't goin'." Toby didn't usually refuse to help search, he thought she liked doing it. He liked it also, putting her to work and keeping her busy made him feel better than when she was hiding and ignoring everyone.

"C'mon, can't leave ya here."

"Why? We ain't gonna find nothin'."

Daryl narrowed his eyes at her, why is she suddenly so talkative? He asked himself. He turned around to briefly glance at the door of the RV, remembering the odd look on Lori's face before he went in.

"Somethin' happen while we were gone?"

She shook her head

"Nothin'?"

"Don't matter."

"What doesn't matter? The hell is up with you?"

"Nothin', Lori was bein' a bitch. That's 'bout it."

Daryl's eyes widened, taken aback by her comment. "Why do ya say that?"

It was Toby's turn to look confused, "that's what you say, and she was."

Daryl didn't really care what she said about Lori, he was just surprised she cared enough to say it out loud. He did make comments about her bitching every so often in front of Toby, he guessed that was why she was saying it. Though her behavior was still odd. He pushed the thoughts away, deciding to either forget about it or wonder about it later on.

"C'mon, everyone's waitin' on you. If ya don't want everyone to spend the night in the RV ya gotta come so we can get started."

Toby frowned, then got up from the bed. Daryl knew that would work, like him, Toby liked having her space, which no one was able to have when they stayed in the RV. He knew she felt more comfortable sleeping away from the others, it was easier for her to fall asleep that way he noticed. He assumed she was worried about her nightmares, and being afraid she'd wake everyone up. It happened a few times over the months, but she wasn't the only one yelling in her sleep. Most of them were having night terrors, no one was able to relax on the road.

Going outside, Daryl handed her one of his hunting knives, something he did often. With her height, and how short her own knives were, they made it harder for her to take Walkers down. His knife was serrated and longer.

The next two hours were spent searching houses on the street, they split up into three groups. Unfortunately, they weren't as lucky as they'd hoped to be. In those two hours, they found a box of stale cereal, two cans of food, and a few energy bars.

"I can't believe this, every house, cleaned out," T-Dog exclaimed as they all entered a house together. The sky was darkening, it was time for them to settle in for the night. They chose a house close to the RV that they'd searched earlier.

"Too bad ya can't hallucinate some food," Daryl commented.

T-Dog rolled his eyes, "yo, I wasn't hallucinating, I saw someone. Was probably just a Walker but I saw someone."

"There were no damn Walkers in there."

"Then it was a reflection, just drop it okay? Don't take out your pissy-ness on me."

Rick only sighed as he walked by, not engaging in their conversation.

Guillermo had other ideas, attempting to speak, "Daryl I-"

"-Fuckin' save it," Daryl snapped at him. "Sick of yer 'sorrys' I ain't the one ya almost killed. This is the second time she saved yer ass." Daryl waved Toby to him, she followed him away from Guillermo.

"He's not wrong," T-Dog told Guillermo. "If you weren't up for this you should've said something. We went through a lot of Walkers earlier, if it was too much, you just had to say."

Guillermo looked down, ashamed.

"Rick," Daryl called. "What're we gonna do about this?"

"We'll sort it out tomorrow, alright? Let's just eat and rest."

Daryl's face was turning red with anger, "if it was Carl-"

"-I'm thinking about that already!" Rick interrupted. "Guillermo could've easily been with me and Carl instead of Ty. But the day's over and there's nothing to do about it now. I'm pissed too. We'll figure it out tomorrow. Either we'll take him off house duty, or just have him separate from the kids. Please, I'm exhausted." Rick turned and went into the living room, plopping himself down on the couch.

Daryl, Toby, and Guillermo were searching a house together. An incident occurred while Guillermo was in a room, alone. A Walker surprised him before he could kill it, he froze, dropped his weapon and trying to push it away. Toby was closest, hearing the commotion she ran in, attempting to get the Walker off Guillermo, she kicked it in the leg, trying to lower it and then throwing her arm back to stab it in the head. But the Walker fell lower than she anticipated, causing her to miss with the knife.

Daryl made it to the room to find Toby struggling with the Walker, and Guillermo standing all the way across the room, just watching.

Just as Daryl reached for the Walker to pull it off her, Toby finally jabbed her knife into its eye.

Daryl completely lost it after, yelling at the man. He'd even grabbed him by the shirt, about to punch him. Changing his mind last second, Daryl just pushed him hard against the wall before letting him go.

Afterward, Daryl met the group in the street, yelling to Rick what happened. He said they couldn't trust Guillermo anymore, and he shouldn't be searching with them if he was just going to watch people die and do nothing.

Guillermo did not try to defend himself. When Daryl was done yelling, he tried to apologize. Daryl wouldn't hear it. It wasn't the only time Toby went to his rescue. Back at the highway, when they lost Sophia while a herd was passing through, one Walker had gotten into the RV. Toby killed it.

The group had their share of food before settling in, there were only the main floor and two bedrooms. Toby didn't say anything the rest of the day, exhausting all of her talkativeness.

Toby slowly opened her eyes to the darkened room, feeling very awake. Blinking a few times, her eyes fighting through the heavy feeling to adjust her sight in the dark. Reaching out her hand to feel the cool, flat surface of a wall.

Her brain tried to register her whereabouts, almost believing, for the briefest moment, she was at home. Where her bed was against the wall.

Dismissing that thought, the next was the farm, but she wasn't in a tent. Toby sat up, the cover of the sleeping bag sliding off. The house carried the sounds of heavy, even breathing, along with some soft snores.

Her brain ran through all the places they'd stayed, finally remembering Carnesville. Daryl had given her one of the sleeping bags, usually, she got Merle's, but Daryl had given his. It was easy to tell because his scent was strong in it.

Sasha and Tyreese were sleeping in the living room as well, Sasha got the couch, while Tyreese was in a sleeping bag a few feet away. Daryl was in another room, Toby wasn't sure where.

Toby laid back down and closed her eyes. This happened a lot, waking up wide awake in the night, with no chance of falling asleep.

When Toby heard footsteps, she decided to give up. She craned her head in time to see T-Dog walk passed the room toward the front door. When he disappeared into the hall, the front door creaked open before closing. He was on watch.

She sat up again, knowing sleep would be impossible until she was tired again. Toby reached under the corner of the sleeping bag and felt Shane's gun. Then looked around for her bag, before remembering she'd left it in the RV.

In her bag was one of Dale's books. Flipping through the pages and counting them passed the time, or just bored her enough to make her tired. There was also a colouring book and crayons (except for the colour yellow). And an old rag she used to clean Shane's gun. That was something she did a lot, it made her feel better at times, she'd to it at least once or twice a day.

Contemplating whether it was worth it to go get her bag, she got up, deciding she needed to use the bathroom. Automatically, she reached for Shane's hat and put it on, it was routine, what she always did when waking up.

Although the water wasn't running in the houses, some of them still decided to use the toilet if they were only passing through, So that's what Toby did, not wanting to do her business outside in the dark where T-Dog was.

When finished, she decided to go get her bag to clean Shane's gun.

T-Dog jumped and turned, aiming his gun at the child when the door opened.

"Crap!" He said, lowering it. "Sorry, kid. Just jumpy tonight. Can't get over it. Did I wake you?"

Toby shook her head.

"Good. I couldn't sit still. I keep going from inside to out here, don't want anything sneaking up on us. I was afraid I'd wake someone up. You need something?"

"My bag. In the RV."

He nodded, "okay, I'll grab it."

She opened her mouth to protest, but he was already walking away. That was unexpected. Movement out of the corner of her caught her attention, turning, there was nothing there. A soft indistinct sound, almost rustling had Toby's eyes glued to the corner of the house. A Walker? No, they were usually louder and more clumsy, an animal more likely. Toby listened more, but all was quiet. Looking back at the RV, T-Dog was gone, out of sight inside the RV which was parked just in front of the house.

The hairs on the back of her neck rose, head buzzing with alarm. Shane's gun was still under the sleeping bag, and her knives were on the floor next to it.

Toby opened her mouth to call T-Dog, but stopped. It was probably nothing. No use in waking anyone up.

Toby considered where her bag was, remembering she left it on the floor beside the bed. T-Dog might not think to look there, and he was taking longer then he should. She walked away from the front door, turning her back completely on the house to go help him.

That was when a hand grasped her hair, yanking her backward. Toby gasped and before she could make a sound, a hand clasped over her mouth.

"Shit, shit, hurry," a man's voice whispered urgently beside her. Toby struggled, kicking out her legs and clawing at the hand on her mouth. The man stepped in front of her, showing her that there must've been two people. The man grabbed her feet so the other could pull her back more quickly.

Toby tried screaming from her throat, it made some noise, but not much.

"Shut her up!" the man dropped her legs after they pulled her into the gap between houses, right where Toby thought she heard something.

"I'm tryin'!" the second voice was a woman's. She let go of Toby's hair and wrapped an arm around her throat, pushing down on her vocal cords and cutting her air supply.

"Knock her out, do somethin'. Hurry, Cliff, before the guy comes back."

Toby kicked out her legs as much as she could. The man; Cliff, grabbed Toby's hair at the side of her head, pulling her away from the woman. When the woman took her arm from around Toby's neck, she'd taken that second to suck in a deep breath. Before she could make a noise to alert the other, Cliff forcefully smacked her head into the wall of the house.

Toby's forehead collided with brick before her body became deadweight, the man let her go and she fell to the ground.

"Shit, ya kill her?"

"The hell you care for? Ya wanna feed it?"

"Fuck no."

"Then get over it, gonna have ta finish it off once we're done." All Toby could do was listen, her brain struggled to figure out what was happening. "Stay here, I'm gonna go over there and take him when he steps out."

"Hurry up, I don't think anyone heard. Use the gun in case he spots ya."

Cliff nodded, picking up a shotgun from the ground, he'd dropped it to grab the small girl easily, they had to pull her out of sight so they weren't caught.

Toby's eyes were closed, all she could do was listen. It finally registered, there were people, bad people, she'd been attacked, T-Dog was close, but not close enough.

She opened her eyes, craning her head up to see heels of two running shoes. One of them was still there, but she didn't know which. Toby opened her mouth, trying to form words or even a name. But nothing could come out, her head wasn't working, it hurt too much.

She wished she had just slept, sleep sounded great at that moment. There was a brief consideration of closing her eyes, letting it happen so it wouldn't hurt so much.

Her vision cleared a little more, she could see dirt, grass, the shoes, and something else a bit further. It was dark and rounded, the hat, Shane's hat. It was knocked off in the struggle.

She wished she had Shane's gun.

She wished she had Shane. That was where her thoughts were focused, her mind was swimming in pain, it was nice to be able to wrap her thoughts around something. Kiddo. She still remembered his voice, heard it in her dreams at times.

You don't think, You just-you act. Because odds are somebody else is counting on you.

Toby remembered that day, she'd felt scared and confused. Shane kept going on about being ready to make a choice. Adrenalin . . . it'll cripple you if you let it.

You don't think

You act

Someone else is counting on you

Toby took in a few quiet breaths, just to make sure she could. No more trying to figure out what to do, she didn't bother with words. Instead, she used the rawest form of communication, the purest way a soul could ask for help. The scream that tore through her was a sound that, when heard by anyone, bypassed any logical thought and evoked a physical response. Anyone within hearing distance was on their feet.

The woman turned and gasped, instantly kicking her foot out into Toby's shoulder. Toby didn't stop, she brought her arms out to guard her face as the woman kicked her side.

T-Dog bolted out of the RV, seeing the man standing just a few feet from him, holding a shotgun with both hands.

Cliff was unprepared, T-Dog had surprised him before he had the chance. Caught off guard, he was too slow in raising the gun, T-Dog tackled him to the ground. As they wrestled, T-Dog was able to briefly look up to see Sasha was the first to burst out of the house.

"Toby!" he yelled as he continued to try and pry the gun from the man, wanting to get the message across to help her first. He jabbed his elbow into the man's side, trying to get him to let go.

Sasha followed Toby screams and yanked the woman away from her.

Meanwhile, the man was finally able to give T-Dog a blow to the head, using the opportunity to straddle his chest and hold the gun to his throat. He glared at the others, who were only a few feet away, "ya try anythin' he's dead!"

He looked down, a smile curling up the corners of his mouth, "yer gonna give us yer food, yer guns-" But turning away from the others proved to be a fatal and moronic mistake. Because as soon as he was no longer paying attention, Rick and Tyreese had charged and pulled him off T-Dog.

They punched and kicked, ripping the gun from his hands. Rick turned the gun, aimed it at the attackers head and fired.

But nothing happened, Rick glared down at the gun confused. It wasn't loaded.

Seeing that the others were helping T-Dog, Daryl was on his way to help Toby and Sasha, wielding his crossbow at the ready. But just as he got there, the woman punched Sasha hard, causing her to fall back into Daryl, blocking him from making a shot.

Despite the fact that the man was outnumbered, he had no intention of giving up. He continued to scream and swear at the men, trying to get away. T-Dog grabbed Rick's python from his belt, aimed it at the assailant's forehead and fired.

Then it was quiet.

Until Sasha yelled, "she's running!"

Daryl ran after the woman, after getting a good 10-yards away, he stopped to aim his crossbow. But it was dark and the woman was fast. Unless he got closer he'd miss.

"Daryl!" Rick called, trying to stop. "Stop!"

Daryl considered it, wanting so badly to give in to his anger and bury a bolt in that woman's skull. But in the dark, in an area they didn't know, that wasn't smart. Especially if there could be more of them.

He looked behind him at the others, seeing that Sasha and Toby were still on the ground. He shook his head, giving up on the hunt and running to the girls. Tyreese did the same. He helped Sasha sit up, she was holding a hand over her nose and blood covered her lips and chin.

"Is it broken?"

Sasha shook her head, her voice muffled, "I don't think so." Sasha turned to Toby, trying to help her with Daryl.

"Ohmygod, is she okay?"

Daryl was silent, he didn't ask questions, he only inspected the young girl. Forcing her to sit up and examining her face. The corner of her forehead was skinned, but it was more bruised then bloody, already turning a dark blue.

Toby turned her head and spit the blood out from her mouth. She lifted her eyes to meet his, they were red and wet. Her lip quivered, still scared. Toby leaned her head forward, laying her head on his shoulder.

Daryl held his lips closed tight, so sure that when his mouth opened, he would start screaming. He was so mad, at those people, at T-Dog who was supposed to be on watch, even angry at Toby for being outside. He knew she barely slept but did she have to be outside?

Daryl only nodded to Sasha. Apart from a nasty goosebump and some blood, Toby seemed alright.

"Is she alright?" T-Dog was the next to ask, standing a few feet away.

"Think so. Are you?" Tyreese asked.

"Think so."

"Rick?" Lori called from the door. When everyone ran out Rick told Lori to keep Carl inside.

"Stay inside," Rick told her. "We'll be there in a minute."

Later on, everyone was in the living room. After the ordeal happened, Tyreese and Rick walked around the house, then down the road a little. Checking to see if there were any evidence of anyone around.

"Are you sure they were alone?" Lori stood beside Carl, holding him close. Sasha was sitting on the couch next to Toby, cleaning the blood off her face with a rag.

"No," he replied. "Just an assumption. There are nine of us, two of them. His gun wasn't even loaded. If there were more, they would've been there to back them up. He only had the gun to scare us."

"He didn't do a very good job," Tyreese commented, referring to how fast he and Rick knocked him down.

"They were desperate. Had to be." T-Dog said. He was leaning against the wall, keeping his eyes on the window.

"How are you?" Rick asked him, T-Dog hadn't said much since the attack.

"I just killed a guy. So not great. But . . . who knows how long they've been without food. And I know we don't use our guns if we can help it, we try to take Walkers out quietly. But at least we have the option, you know? We have bullets if we really need them, they didn't. They had to be desperate."

"You fuckin' defendin' 'em now?" Daryl spat out. "They tried to kill us, didn't have to be shit."

T-Dog looked away from the window, meeting Daryl's eyes, "no. I'm just . . . sympathizing, I guess? We could've given them food. I know we don't have much left, but we wouldn't have let them go starving, the state they were in. We would've spared a can or two. . ."

Rick looked away, staring at his shoes to avoid any eye contact.

"Oh yeah, thanks for not bashin' our heads in with that gun, have some beans." Daryl scoffed. "Pussy."

"Yo, think about it, that could be us! Starving, doing whatever we can just for a single meal."

"It already is us!" Daryl fired back. "What were you doin' that got you and that kid out gettin' yer asses kicked?"

"Daryl, calm down," Rick told him, crossing his arms.

Daryl turned to Toby on the couch. "Why were ya even out there?"

"It's not her fault," T-Dog said quickly. He didn't like the way Daryl was acting, so he steered his attention off of the girl. "I left her alone."

"Why?" Rick questioned, he didn't look mad or annoyed with him. Rick wasn't about to guess how things would've turned out if T-Dog was the only one out there. Things either could've gone a lot worse. Maybe, but they could've gone better also. "Where were you?"

T-Dog glanced at Toby before looking down, "I had to grab something from the RV. It was quiet, figured I had a minute."

"Did ya forget yer job was important or something? Thought you could take a break? All you people are the same. Just fuckin' lazy." Daryl huffed out a breath angrily.

T-Dog's head physically jerked back, almost as if he'd been slapped. He narrowed his eyes, not believing what he heard. "Man, you did not . . . are you for real pulling the race card right now? You are not serious."

Daryl tilted his head to the side mockingly, "aw, yer feelin's hurt? What're you gonna do? Handcuff me and leave me behind?"

"That wasn't my fault!"

"The hell it wasn't. You didn't drop that key you threw it, you were just scared. Probably the smartest thing ya ever did."

"Scared of what? Are you joking?" T-Dog's eyes were wide with anger and surprise.

"You were smart 'nough ta realize he knew just how to put a nigger like you in yer place."

T-Dog's fist lashed out, Daryl blocked the fist with his hand easily, as if he'd been expecting it. Then he landed a punch to T-Dog's face without hesitation.

Rick went for T-Dog's shoulders, yanking him away as Tyreese did the same with Daryl.

"Stop this right now!" Rick's voice bellowed.

Daryl didn't fight against Tyreese, letting himself be pulled away without making it difficult. He had no intention of throwing another punch.

"You want to say that again?" Tyreese glared at Daryl as he held him back.

T-Dog was a bit more resistant, attempting to pull himself away from Rick as he raged. "This what you want, huh?! You want everyone to hate you?!"

"I don't give a shit." Daryl jerked his arms from Tyreese, "git yer hands off me."

Tyreese let him go, but was prepared in case more fists went flying.

"Stop acting like your brother, whatever this is, it isn't you." T-Dog was still, attempting to calm himself. It was difficult with the adrenalin pulsing through him, it'd never really had a chance to leave his system since the attack.

"Fuck off, you don't know shit about me."

"I know you're pissed, I know you're scared and you're worried about her. But screaming at everyone and pointing fingers isn't going to help anything. Especially when you're really pointing them at yourself."

Daryl rolled his eyes, "what now?"

T-Dog pulled himself from Rick. "You're thinking it's your fault you weren't awake like you think it's your fault she was alone with Guillermo. Both times, today and back on the highway, you lost your mind. Again when Shane took her. Your pissed because you weren't there to do anything yourself. But you were, you always showed up."

Daryl stepped closer to T-Dog, looking as if he was going to bite his head off, "I don't give a shit about some dumb kid!"

"Hey!" Sasha blurted.

"When are you people gonna get this through your heads! Just because she follows me around like a lost puppy, don't make her my problem! I ain't her fuckin' keeper!"

"No one said you were, man! That's what I'm trying to say! Do you know why she follows you around? Because you're there! I don't know what started it, if she went to your brother to get away from us or get some kind of rise out of Shane. But when we left, every moment after you were there! When she found out about her dad, she went to you, because we were the shitheads that kept it from her. At the CDC, you were the first to go after her and the first to get pissed we almost lost her. When we were trying to figure out what to do about Shane, you were already on your bike. You were there."

"You were there too! We both were with Shane!"

"And who held her back while he died? Was it you or me? Or were you busy with the Walkers?"

"Someone had to keep 'em off our backs! I would've held her back just the same," Daryl didn't get where T-Dog was going with it, none of it made sense to him.

"But you didn't, if you did maybe she'd hate you as much as me and Rick. But you didn't. And every time after, when we left the farm, you checked on her, you made her eat. You were the only one she even looked at."

"This is bullshit, why are we talkin' about this shit? It's got nothin' ta do wi-"

"-Then stop acting like it's everyone's fault you care. You're not a babysitter, you're a friend, part of this group. No one's forcing her on you. She goes to you and you go to her because you care, not because we don't. Even if she liked us more, can you really say you'll have nothing to do with her?"

Daryl just shook his head, hearing every word but pretending not to. He almost calmed down, the way T-Dog pointed things out had him thinking, but he couldn't show them that. He was not okay that all the attention was on him, he had to shift it around. Especially since he had no other responses to this conversation, what did they expect him to say?

He wanted them to be as mad as he was, things were getting too easy. Was it because he was getting too attached? Were they all just too comfortable with one another?

"Why the fuck," Daryl breathed in, each word coming out slow like he was trying not to blow up, "are you even here?"

T-Dog narrowed his eyes, "what's that supposed to-"

"-Not you!" Daryl cut him off, not able to hold his agitation back any longer. He pointed at Toby, "you."

Toby was staring back at him with wide eyes, looking anxious and confused. Everyone was quiet, including her, no one knew where this was headed.

"Why didn't you stay?" Daryl said again, his teeth bared.

"I-I-was-" Toby struggled for an answer. She didn't want to say why she was going outside, she felt guilty already. But it didn't seem like Daryl was about to let it go. "I was, I was up so-"

"-No!" Daryl cut her off. "I'm not talkin' 'bout this shitty ass house, I'm talkin' 'bout the farm!"

Still no response, from anyone. Most had no idea what he was saying. The only people that knew Toby was offered a home at the farm were her, T-Dog, and Daryl. Toby had no idea anyone else knew.

She didn't know what to say. The way Daryl was asking made her want to answer to get it over with. But she didn't have an answer.

Daryl grew increasingly impatient, "Jesus Christ will ya fuckin' talk! I'm so sick of this mute shit! You can talk I know ya can so answer me. Why the hell didn't you stay?!"

"I didn't want to," She answered quickly, yet quietly. The words had come out slow and shaky, using each syllable.

"But ya wanted this?!" Daryl gestured with both hands around the house. "Months on the road, lookin' for nothin', almost gettin' killed every damn day. You almost got killed twice today! That what ya wanted? Ya wanna watch us get torn 'part and eaten while-"

"-No!" Toby spat out, wanting him to stop.

Rick was calling his name while pulling on his arm to stop, Daryl roughly yanked himself away, ignoring the man.

"That girl wanted ya ta stay! She wanted ya there! I don't want ya here! If ya stayed this shit wouldn't've happened!" Daryl wasn't the only one yelling then. Rick, Tyreese and T-Dog were telling him to stop, even Lori called out to him. But he swiftly ignored them, they barely existed at that moment.

Toby didn't say anything. Her eyes were wet and her jaw was tight as she glowered at him. Daryl took a step closer, he wanted her to talk, to defend herself, to tell him how much she hated him. But the more he went on, the angrier he got, he almost felt as if it was a setup. She would've had a whole different life if she stayed, but no, she left with them and Daryl was her babysitter. She'd left with them just so it would be his fault every time she was in danger.

Tyreese got closer as well, wanting to put himself between Daryl and the couch. They all knew Daryl wasn't going to hurt Toby, but they also knew he needed to stop.

Daryl ignored Tyreese, continuing his rage as he sidestepped him, "What, this ain't what you were dreamin' of? Starvin' not as fun as ya thought? Fuck, ya went from pickin' peaches and chasin' chickens to runnin' and dyin', the hell were ya expectin'?! Ya wanted this? You like this?"

"I like you."

Daryl stopped. Almost as if he'd been paused somehow, the rage was still there, bubbling and ready to continue spilling over. But he was so caught off guard, he had to stop. He was screaming at a little girl for an answer, why hadn't she taken the one safe place they had? That couldn't have been her answer, why would she say that? He'd been yelling at her, waiting for her to yell back, tell him how much she hated him, or even to fuck off. Possibly even finally explain to him why she went with them, but no.

He was so hesitant, that the others stopped. No one else is yelling, Rick and Tyreese stopped pulling. Everyone waited to see what was next. They almost thought Daryl was done.

The more Daryl hesitated, the more he thought on those three words. I like you. And soon, those seemingly nice words fueled his fire.

So what if she liked him? She chose death on the road over a safe farm because she liked him? And again, that somehow made it all Daryl's fault. She liked him, so she left. She almost died several times, was probably going to starve or get bitten soon, all because she liked him.

"Ya almost died!" He yelled out, causing the others to jump in surprise. "That ain't on me! You're not my fault. I ain't your dad!"

Toby finally pushed herself from the couch, her body darting to a stand as she shouted. "I didn't ask ya to be!"

Daryl's mouth was open, about to shout right back when a hand cracked across his left cheek, causing his head to snap back with the force of the blow. Daryl put a hand on his cheek, turning to glare at whoever delivered the slap.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Sasha spat at him. "You're awful."

Daryl glared at her, ready to start letting out a string of insults her way. Movement out of the corner of his eye made him turn slightly, he saw Toby's back as she retreated out of the room. When his eyes went back to Sasha, hers never wavered, she matched his glare. Her nose was still bleeding slightly, her chin and cheek had red smudges from where she tried to wipe the blood off.

Tyreese was right at his side, glaring, just waiting for Daryl to continue. Daryl finally looked down, taking his head away to reveal the red welt that Sasha left. He looked back into the direction Toby disappeared, just in time to see Carl rushing out the same way.

Lori planned to follow after, she knew after what happened they weren't leaving the house. But she'd still check on them after a few minutes. Lori's eyes caught Guillermo's, he was standing opposite to her across the room, but he was closer to the exit of the living room than she was. He pointed with his thumb to the kids' direction and followed. Lori mouthed him a 'thank you' as he left the room.

Lori knew it was best to leave Toby for a few minutes before trying to check on her. Luckily, Guillermo wouldn't say anything or bother them, he'd only stay close by and watch them. She also wasn't ready to leave the room, she wanted to know what was going on with Daryl, what was going to happen after.

"Daryl," Rick said carefully. "What was that even for? Why would you say all of that?"

"Because he felt like it," Sasha fumed.

"Getting her to hate you, doesn't put her back on the farm. It doesn't make her safer, and it certainly doesn't help anyone else." Lori spoke.

"He wants us to hate him, fine. He's doing an awesome job," T-Dog scoffed. "Apparently it's what he's good at, just like Merle."

Daryl didn't react to them. He hated himself enough for the rest of them at that moment. He wasn't going to talk about it anymore, he had no idea how it escalated so bad.

Now they were focused on how much of an asshole he was. They were analyzing him and his behavior, his relationship with Toby, if anyone could call it that.

That didn't matter. If Toby didn't hate him before she had to then. It was done. There was no use talking about it, but they all were going to anyway. He had to shift their attention to the actual problem.

"Why is no one actin' like they give a shit?" Daryl blurted, his voice was much quieter.

T-Dog was fed up. Daryl's question made no sense to him. "That's funny, from the way your acting right now. And you're saying you're the one that doesn't."

Daryl's anger rose, he found himself wanting to throw out another fist, but he stopped himself. He had his focus now, they were all focused on the aftermath of the issue, and not the actual issue. "You shit heads aren't gettin' this! What just happened! We have four cans of food left! Fuckin' four! And we were almost killed for 'em!"

There it was. He'd dropped the bomb, everything before would be forgotten.

Everyone glanced at each other, looking surprised and confused. "What?" Lori asked when no one spoke up about it.

"Oh yeah, y'all didn't know that," Daryl scoffed and smirked at Rick. "Guess the cats out of the bag, huh, Rick?"

All eyes on Rick. His jaw was tensed as he glared at Daryl.

"Rick, what's he talking about?" Sasha questioned.

"You said we had at least a dozen left," T-Dog said.

"He fuckin' lied. Told me not to say shit, cause we were gonna find so much food, weren't we?" Daryl was facing away the rest of them, enjoying the turmoil he caused.

Rick said nothing at first, he looked around and sighed. "I thought we'd find more."

"Oh my god," Lori put her head in her hands. "That's not even a day's worth."

"You weren't going to tell us?" Tyreese was fuming. He couldn't believe Rick hadn't said anything to him.

"I wanted to be sure-"

"-Sure of what? Sure we were going to starve?" Sasha yelled at him.

Daryl stepped forward and began weaving around the bodies around the room, on his way to the front door. His eyes flickered to the other side of the room, the doorway to the rest of the house, where Carl and Toby went.

"Daryl, where are you going?" Rick sounded as if he wanted to bite his head off.

"Gonna get gas for my bike."

"No, it's still dark. We can do that in the morning."

"I'm doin' it now. Not goin' back into that fuckin' trailer. Ain't like anyone's gon'be sleepin' anyway." Daryl kept going, leaving the room and soon, closing the front door behind him.

"Should someone go with him?" Lori asked.

"I wouldn't," T-Dog grumbled.

Lori scanned the rest of the room. waiting for someone to make a move. No one did. "Rick, you said that girl got away. He shouldn't be out there alone."

"She was alone, she didn't have a weapon or any food. I don't think she's a problem." He replied.

The remaining in the room exchanged glances. They were mad at Rick for not telling them about the food, but they were silent. No one had anything to say. What was the point? It didn't give them more food, it wouldn't make them feel any better. It was a fact they all knew, one they'd been waiting for. They were practically out of food.

They'd have to work harder and longer the next day. They just had to hope luck was on their side.

i think from this chapter, everything is going to be smoother. For me, to write. Not easy on the group. haha.

the winter is just about done and we are closing in on the prison. IM SO HYPED.

So, as for the fight with the 'N' word. didn't like doing that, so hoping I wasn't offending anyone. I used that scene to kind of show that Daryl hasn't really grown into his part of the group just yet. He becomes closer and a bit more mellow later on and at the prison. He still struggles with the person he was when he was with his brother, he's slowly becoming more independent and growing into his own self.

What did you think? did you like it? I was really hoping I wasn't dragging it on too much.

shoutout to my girl Rasha007, pointing out some issues I had earlier. she's the best. give her your love!

Thanks for reading, and being so patient with me.

Please review and let me know what you think!