Soul Marked
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Visions and Feeling
This is out later than I wanted it to be but unfortunately, that is how life goes. It had been left half-finished forever before I managed to get inspired. Thankfully Niftyhope is always there to help give me that push and ideas to get me going again!
Hope you all enjoy this chapter! I was really excited to write it and several of the happenings that go on in it.
Her breathing was ragged, the feeling of the walls closing in on her was overwhelming, but she held the familiar sense at bay as she tightened her grip on Katsuki. Truthful to Aikawa's words she met the girl and Bakugo in front of the school. With a calm smile on her face, she patted the girl's shoulder before leading her toward the large doors.
"All Might has agreed to be standing in the teachers' lounge. We will be walking by, allowing you to see him, before moving on. I'll be observing you the entire time. If at any time I feel as if your losing control I'll step in, but I want you to know Izuka I don't think that'll happen."
It was calming to have someone believe in her so much. Izuka had hardly slept the night before, she hadn't video chatted Bakugo, only doing a call before bed, to keep her mind from playing on her fears, and though the night had gone decently well in that regard, she felt too hyped to actually calm down. It left her tired, but the exhaustion had become a regular part of her life.
As they drew closer to the teachers' lounge Izuka couldn't help but tighten her hold on Bakugo, he was silent next to her, but his answering squeeze told her he wasn't going to disappear. The anxiety that built up seemed to dissipate at the action.
Then she caught sight of All Might. Or at least how he looked when he was just Toshi to her, but now the lines were blurred, and he was both. She could feel as her mind tried blending the two together, the way his Skeletor look, and muscular tried to blur, the walls were shadowed, not quite blood, but they had been bright and clear moments ago. Her breathing picked up as she began to try to ease her mind with the repetition of the grounding method.
She could see Aizawa-sensei, his eyes tired, but they glinted with concern when he noticed her.
Izuka was sure her body was shaking. She couldn't feel it, not at the moment, but she was certain that was what drew the looks of worry her way.
She could smell the floor cleaner that had been applied over the weekend.
Chatter from students passed her by, filling her senses, and beginning to ease her racing mind. After all, they had been alone in her mind space, there hadn't been others, and that helped break the spell over her.
The taste of her toothpaste was still in her mouth.
Most importantly she could feel Bakugo's rough skin under her own, the bond tugging comfortingly at her.
She pressed into his warmth, moving to hide in his side, as her eyes once again focused on Toshi because that's who was in front of her now. Not the man that tore at her heart, but her mentor, a protector.
A relieved sigh escaped her lips before she began to move forward, walking away from the room, because for a few moments she had faced her fears, and though they threatened to conquer her, she won this battle. She hoped later in class she could do the same over again because running away from her problems had never been a habit Izuka formed and she wasn't about to start.
Aikawa left the two to make their way to the dorm before classes started. They had their parents move what they wanted here last night, a strict order from Aikawa that Izuka wouldn't come until the morning, and the girl knew that Bakugo had helped her mother move her stuff. Aizawa had announced a class meeting before school started, now that their last two students would be joining, and since most would be coming from the dorms, Bakugo and Midoriya would be making their way over.
Izuka felt the loss when Bakugo let go of her hand the farther, they got away from Toshi. Aikawa reminded her that he just needed to work things out, that this was only temporary, and was progress from where he was at only a few weeks, to months ago. Izuka reminded herself of this over, and over in her mind, but couldn't help but worry that he might try to ignore her like before.
It was stupid, as he had proved that when she needed him he would place aside his problems, and she owed it to him to let him work out how he felt in his own time.
"Bakugo," Aizawa-sensei said, coming up behind them. "Midoriya. It's good to see you two back." Izuka knew that he would have been informed of her mental deterioration after being rescued, how he would have gotten updates, especially when it came to her coming back to class, and had been informed of Bakugo's pending return as he helped her.
A hand reached out, placed on her shoulder, causing the girl to stop mid-stride. Gazing curiously up at her sensei, she met dark eyes that were still full of concern.
"Sensei?"
"As your homeroom teacher, I will be in charge of watching over you all while you are living in the dormitories. If you need something, regardless of what it is, come to me. I understand that the next few months could potentially be hard for you. Though I am loath to admit it I'm available to help any of you regardless of the time. It is my job. Come to me even if it's just about a panic attack. I can contact Aikawa and have her here immediately."
Midoriya wasn't sure how she felt, but she was thankful for her sensei regardless. Most of her issues could easily be fixed simply by seeing Kacchan though so she was unsure if she'd be taking him up on that very often.
The three of them silently made their way to the dormitories, as they grew closer, Izuka could make out the voices of excitement. Those exclamations only increased in volume when the three of them came into view.
Kaminari was the first to break from the pack, his excited smile blended with worry, as he met them halfway. Momo was only a few steps behind him her face identical to his, but more subdued. The others in their class also welcomed them in similar fashions but held back, allowing the closest friends to surround Midoriya, and not overwhelm her.
The blonde didn't hesitate as he threw himself at Izuka, expressions of happiness at her being back, falling from his lips in rapid succession. His arms moved to engulf her in a hug causing Izuka to laugh, feeling light, as any anxiety she felt disappeared.
"Kami," she said mid-laugh.
"I was so worried about you!" he choked out, seemingly caught between happiness, and tears. "I wanted to join in and try to find you, but we were warned not to for safety reasons. When we learned that they were after you at camp…-." He paused here; Izuka could see the guilt eating him up inside.
"There's nothing you could have done, Kami," she said smiling at him. She had missed her friend and felt bad for just now realizing it. "I was around a lot of people, and they still managed to grab me. I was their main reason for being there. I should have just gone straight to the teachers, but I couldn't."
"I'm just glad you're okay."
He hugged her for a moment longer before allowing Momo to grab her next. The taller girl was far more careful when encasing her in the hug. It was nice, it felt relieving just as much as Kaminari's, and Izuka realized at that moment that she could rely on her friends more often as well. Bakugo may be her soulmate, but there were others that meant something to her as well, who could help her through her problems.
Aizawa coughed, gaining the attention of everyone, his face tired, but set in a stern glare as he waited for them to quiet down.
"Now that Midoriya and Bakugo have joined us I want to remind you all what the camp was meant for, to earn you your provisional license and that's still the goal." The class exploded with realization, muttering to one another, having forgotten with the events that had happened. "Listen up, this is important. You will not be asking Midoriya about what happened, she is still recovering, and we should all be glad that she's back, so keep your curiosity to yourselves." Izuka couldn't help but shrink away from the gazes of her classmates, each curious, and looking guilty, but she was happy Aizawa had said something. She was certain Bakugo would have kept them from it, and her friends wouldn't have tried to make her uncomfortable, but it was natural for them to want to know. Izuka wasn't sure if she wanted to talk about it with them right now, so knowing they had been banned from asking, was relieving.
"I will be showing Midoriya around the dorms before class, so the rest of you start heading out."
Izuka said goodbye to her friends, watching as Bakugo hung back, intent clear that he would be joining them on the tour.
She was amazed by everything that they had. Aizawa-sensei showed her the common area, how the bathrooms were connected, the laundry room as well, before showing her to her room on the second floor, Bakugo muttering lowly about how he was on the fourth. It made her feel better when she was told that they moved Momo from another floor to her's, another layer of protection, that went unsaid, but what they also thought would make her feel more comfortable. It did, she was happy to hear the news.
The tour hadn't taken long, Aizawa-sensei didn't linger in each room, nor did he go out of his way to show where everyone else's rooms were, only stating who stayed on her own floor, and that was it. They headed out toward their classroom getting there right before the bell. This she was sure had been planned perfectly as Aizawa always entered at the exact same second every morning.
"As I mentioned earlier our primary goal is to get your provisional license." Aizawa started as soon as the bell had died down. "Hero licenses are inextricably tied to the saving of lives, so one must be properly qualified for such a heavy responsibility. Naturally, this test is extremely hard. It's known to only get a fifty percent success rate." This knowledge caused Izuka to blink rapidly, she was shocked, and a little apprehensive, wondering if she was going to be ready for such a tough test. "Starting today each of you needs to come up with at least two ultimate moves." His final words were drowned out by the other three teachers who had already arrived before them.
Izuka straightened her spine. She had no other choice but to make herself ready. This was important. Her future relied on her to do her best. If she gave in, just because anxiety had crept in, her dreams, and goals, wouldn't be accomplished.
She wouldn't just give in.
The teachers each went on to explain what this would entail, how it would identify who they were, and the reason for it. Then, along with the others, grabbed her costume, heading toward Gym Gamma, where they would begin their training, and create their ultimate moves.
子猫
Izuka had already started thinking about her ultimate moves without realizing it. When she had been training under All Might and Gran Torino, she realized she had the start of an ultimate move already in the works. Her idea of breaking up the ground underneath her was to effectively cause an earthquake, but she wanted something else. Her arms, during her fight with muscular, had taken quite a hit, sometimes they would begin to shake, and she was loathed to admit it, but without that doctor that Shigaraki had used to heal her, she was certain she would be in worst condition but wanted to incorporate a move with her legs to balance it out. It was best to be as unpredictable as possible when it came to a fighting style, she didn't want anyone to rely on her using her fists only and begin to guess her next move.
Not exactly sure about her second move, Izuka ended up practicing the earthquake move, not certain what she would name it yet, but incorporating the advice Ectoplasm sent her way to improve upon it.
Too busy with this she didn't even notice Toshi at the entrance, hesitant to walk in, but wanting to see the kids' improvement, and most importantly how she was doing.
Toshi had seen the look of horror on her face as she gazed at him, the way it had melted from simple recognition to something of fear. He hated seeing it, cursed the ones who did it to her, and though he wouldn't show his face today, not yet, would let her get used to the knowledge that he was around, before showing himself. Anything to make her comfortable, but the urge to comfort her, to be there in her time of need, was also tugging him to peek in on the class.
Aizawa noticed him, his eyes narrowing, as he shifted his body toward him.
"What are you doing here?"
"I know, I wasn't scheduled, and it's better that I'm not, but I don't plan on being seen by her."
"It's probably for the best."
"Yeah." He sighed. "I want to be there for her, and the rest, to teach and pass on my knowledge. I figured it wouldn't hurt to peek in, see what they're doing, and give advice later when I've joined the class again."
"She seems to be doing fine."
"I see that."
"Beside this morning and some moments of short-lived anxiety, Midoriya seems to be acclimating well to being back at school."
"I worry for when they place me back in class."
"She did well enough this morning. We'll keep Bakugo nearby when that happens."
"Aikawa-san believes he is key to keeping her calm around me."
"We'll do as she suggests in the period of time she has stated." Toshi nodded, taking one final glance toward Izuka, before ducking back out of the gym. Aizawa took notice of a book hanging out of his pocket, only catching the words 'Helping loved ones heal' before he disappeared around the corner. Shaking his head, he turned back toward his students. The whole situation was beyond anything he imagined for his year at teaching and now he was tied in the middle of it.
His nickname of problem child for the girl was frequently becoming a proper title for her, but his worry over her had only increased as well. This class was certainly going to be the death of him, or prematurely age him.
子猫
Later, after school was over, Izuka found herself back in the dorms, noticing how the others had already grown comfortable in their new environment. It felt homey, surrounded by her friends, and safe. It was far busier here than at home, and though at first, she had worried that would become overwhelming after a while, Izuka learned she basked in it instead. The knowledge that she was surrounded brought on a sense of ease.
True to Aizawa's order no one tried to crowd her, asking for details, only exclaiming how they were happy to have her back. After dinner, she was cornered by Momo, and Kaminari, the two wishing to talk to her by themselves, and she willingly left Bakugo's watchful eyes to go up to her room. Kaminari, who had seen the version of what her room at home looked like was surprised to see that most of her hero things hadn't been brought over. Her walls were still quite bare, the bedding a simple yellow comforter, with blue sheets underneath. He could see a picture of her, and her mother on the desk, and a few items, like books, and journals, he recognized, but that was it.
"Where are all of your hero stuff?" he asked without thinking.
Izuka frowned, her eyes gazing over where the posters of All Might should have been, the figurines, and random tidbits of heroes that she had collected over the years.
Momo, who had never seen her room, but knew from when Kaminari had boisterously described to her how Izuka's room was nowhere near what she had expected for the girl, and this wasn't it.
"It was removed, packed away until it became easier for me to view All Might. I decided not to bring my other hero stuff in the meantime." In truth Izuka hadn't wanted to bring them, to show the obvious gaps, and remind herself why they were there in the first place. It was upsetting to know that her trauma had leaked into the things she had loved.
"Oh." Kaminari realized he had messed up, not needing the look Momo had sent his way, as he glomped Izuka in the next moment. Surprised, the shorter girl stared wide-eyed, as Kaminari began to cry above her. "I'm sorry."
She wondered if he was apologizing for the question he had asked, but didn't believe that warranted the tears, and instead decided it was more about why they had asked her to talk in private.
Momo watched from her spot a few steps away, her eyes downcast, as she seemed to start to shake. Izuka's eyes widened, wondering if she was crying as well, and felt lost as to what to do. So, not doing anything, she opened her arms, elbowing Kaminari to make room, and felt as Momo joined the group hug. The two locked her between them as they sniffled, causing Izuka's own tears to erupt, as she gripped them tightly.
"I didn't even know until the next day," Momo cried. Her tears were petite, small, and controlled like Izuka felt fitted Momo perfectly, but the sobs that wracked through her body were powerful and were the opposite of the usually composed taller girl. "My head had gotten hurt. Kaminari told me you had already been gone for twenty-four hours."
"I'm going to work harder from now on," Kaminari choked out. "Wherever you go, I'm going as well, so I can be your backup. I'm going to buckle down on my schoolwork. I'll be there if you ever need me in the future."
"I don't blame either of you." She welcomed the warmth that surrounded her, ignoring the way her shoulder was wet from how Kaminari had buried himself into her neck, or the way her hair felt damp, as Momo cried into it. "I'm just glad neither of you was hurt too badly, and Kami, I know you don't want to hear this, but knowing you were with the teachers made me so happy."
"I mean we saw that fire user briefly, but Aizawa-sensei took care of him."
"I was with someone from Class 1-B," Momo said. "At one point we were being chased by a Nomu, I must have gotten hurt, cause the next moment I remember is about to be attacked, and then it just left. If I had known, it was because they had you…" She couldn't finish that sentence, the sob escaping her mouth keeping her from continuing.
Secretly, Izuka was glad that one good thing had come out of her being caught. The idea that her friend had come close to death was startling, but she wasn't going to vocalize this opinion. She knew they wouldn't appreciate it.
"We all made it," Izuka said firmly. "We're safe."
"If you ever need us, we're here," Momo said.
"Yeah!" Kaminari said brightly. "For anything." He had begun to wipe at his eyes, the two girls following pursuit, as they untangled themselves from one another. "Don't tell anyone I cried. Mineta would give me shit about it forever."
"Your secrets are safe with me," Izuka said, a smile growing on her lips. "I love you guys." They tackled her back in another hug, this one full of laughter, as they echoed the sentiment.
It was nice. It felt like home.
子猫
She was sitting in her bed, her phone lighting up the night, shadowing her face, as she stared down at the time. It was the early hours of the morning, she had been sleeping relatively easily tonight, knowing she was surrounded, and the bond with Bakugo warming her as he was only a few floors up. It had been one of the easier nights for her, but it wasn't all just having Kacchan close, no, she had a busy day, training for the first time in weeks. It had been nice, but exhausting, which was why Izuka felt unsure about why she had been startled awake suddenly. She couldn't remember dreaming, not sure if she had the ability with how tired she had been.
Then she felt it.
A nagging sensation, insistent, demanding that she pay attention. Izuka frowned, it felt like what she experienced with Kacchan when the bond was particularly active. Instinctively, Izuka knew that this wasn't coming from Kacchan, but from someone else. There was only one other person who could cause her to feel something like this.
She wasn't sure how she felt about it. It was yet another confirmation of what she was already coming to understand. Shigaraki was her soulmate. They were intertwined just as tightly by an invisible force as she and Kacchan were.
Throughout the night Izuka could feel how restless he was, and in turn, it made her unable to sleep. A feeling of confliction over the issue began to settle in as Izuka realized this sensation wasn't diminishing. She was stuck between feeling the inconvenience of being unable to go back to sleep, it was still just a few hours from her regular wake-up time, and a deeply unsettling realization of being able to feel the emotions of the person who had kidnapped her.
Upon further investigation Izuka was hit with the comprehension that there was a small part of her, perhaps the part that managed to connect her soul to Shigaraki, that was…. intrigued with the situation. That thought was jarring, it startled her, bringing her out of the almost panicked state she had found herself falling into. Slowly, her thoughts, and emotions began to calm, falling into ease, as she assured herself that she was safe, and yes, she was witnessing Shigaraki's emotions, but no it didn't seem like he was aware of her trespassing on his emotional state.
Settling back Izuka laid there, allowing the emotions to wrap around her, surging forward, as she curiously took in each and every one of them. Finding it fascinating that he could feel so much in such a short amount of time.
Her curiosity, she knew, was getting the better of her, but she couldn't find it in herself to care. They were connected. Would it be so bad to take this chance to better understand him?
As she lay there, staring up at the ceiling, emotion after emotion rolling over her, Izuka was struck with the thought that Shigaraki was a very emotional person. Izuka would find that over the next several days she would find herself pondering this often.
It was dizzying experiencing everything being sent her way.
Restlessness, anger, hate, and frustration, were just a few that she experienced most often emanating from him and were the most often there in some way, but she was surprised to find that there was a small but definite note of vulnerability, uneasiness, and a deep-rooted sense of hurt. The first time she experienced it Izuka thought it had only been imagined, it had disappeared nearly as soon as she had felt it, but it would randomly reemerge, before being chased away by the rage, hate, and frustration. It was like a game of cat and mouse, the way they danced around, one chasing after the other, in a way that Izuka felt Shigaraki was trying to drown it out.
By the time that her alarm clock startled her out of her 'Shigaraki-watching', a few hours after initialy waking up, Izuka was certain about one thing. That pain, and hurt, were always there. Buried deep sometimes, but it had become easier to sense with time. As she got ready for the day Izuka could feel the desire to know what caused him that pain, what had happened to him, that it would have become such an integrated part of him, defining him more than the hate and rage that leaked from him.
She spent most of the day in a haze of tiredness and tuning in on the emotions that raged within her, finding them fascinating, and a need to understand them.
Izuka missed the worried glances that Bakugo, and her friends, sent her throughout the day. So stuck in her own mind she was on autopilot, moving through her classes without taking much in, only coming to when they were once again working on their ultimate moves. This caused her to focus on her work, but it was made hard by the way Shigaraki seemed to demand her attention. Curiosity at the thought of him knowingly doing this or not had begun to cloud her mind. Distracted as she was, Izuka took several hits that should have been easily avoided from Ectoplasm.
At the end of the day, Katsuki cornered her, pulling her along an empty path, before finding a secluded spot to talk.
"What's going on with you?" he asked, his grip on her arm was firm, but not meant to hurt. It demanded her attention and forced her to focus on him as if the bond that rushed to greet her at the touch would ever allow her to ignore him.
"I'm just tired," she said. Izuka hesitated to tell him the complete truth, that she had been woken up early by the bond she held with Shigaraki. She worried it would be too much for him, and he would grow angry. It hadn't been very long since she dropped the bombshell of her disappearing Mark, and who she had also bonded with. She felt the need to protect him from this, and to keep this part of the connection to Shigaraki a secret for now. At least until Katsuki had grown used to the idea of them being bonded and could accept it.
This caused a new look of worry to take over, he hadn't been awoken by the panic she normally sent his way when she had nightmares, but that didn't mean it hadn't happened.
"Did something happen last night? An attack?" Izuka shook her head, not wanting to worry him, especially since things were still a little awkward.
"Nothing like that," she assured. "Just woke up and had trouble going back to sleep." She felt guilty lying to him, but it was for the best. Taking a step back he observed her, seemingly checking for a lie, and though he frowned, Katsuki dropped it. He put space back between them as they walked to the dorms. Once there she found him conveniently nearby until most started getting ready for bed. An odd feeling settled over her chest at the space that her words put between them. Izuka found herself wishing that time would speed up and he had either accepted everything or finally told her he never would be able to.
She feared the second one. More than she liked to admit.
The next several days passed in a similar fashion. The only change was she had been able to sleep in the days following, blocking out the emotions that bombarded her. Katsuki still was keeping space between them, but he never disappeared, nor did he make her feel as if she was unwanted around him, just that he was more quiet than normal. Sometimes she caught him staring at her, a complicated expression hovering on his features before it would disappear and be replaced with his normal scowl.
Izuka kept herself busy, finding her exhausted state was good for something, it didn't allow the nightmares to plague her sleep. Within the end of the week, she had gone full-on with expanding and perfecting her fighting style, and deciding that a change in her costume was needed.
She had high ambitions, wanting a way to go completely unnoticed when needed, and her costume, though darker than most, was still a red flag that she was a hero. It didn't blend in with civilians, it wasn't supposed to, but she needed both.
A costume with the flexibility of telling those who she was, and the ones she wanted to stay out of sight of, and it hadn't taken her long to think of the person for the job. After all, most would have told her it wasn't possible, but there was someone else who was crazy enough to find a solution to her problem.
At the end of the week, Izuka found herself seeking out Hatsume, whom she found covered in grease, as she dug through a pile of metal muttering to herself.
The girl was excited to see her again, gushing over the dilemma that was handed to her, as her yellow-greenish eyes widened in happiness at the task handed to her.
"Oh!" she screeched. "What an idea! The possibilities! I have to start on this immediately. I'll need your hero costume, you won't be able to use it until I've finished, it might take me a couple of days, a week at the most. I've been working on something similar. I think if I combine that prototype with this idea…." Hatsume began to mumble, rambling, as she turned away from Midoriya, lost in the process of making a new baby. Feeling as if she had been left behind Izuka left the shop, deciding to leave it in Hatsume's capable hands, and if the need arose she would just use her original costume. This wasn't an issue, as the provisional exam was still far enough away that Izuka didn't feel the need to panic about hitting that deadline, and was sure that if it couldn't be done, she would be notified before then.
All she could do on that end was sit back and wait.
It was easier said than done.
An antsy buzz had begun to creep under her skin over the last day. It was foreign, not something she was feeling, but it had begun to affect her own mood. Within the last hour, her skin had begun to crawl, causing her fingers to drum against the wood of her desk, as the teacher's voice droned. Normally she found even the most mundane class exciting, heroes were teaching her after all, but today it felt like she wanted to crawl out of her own skin. Without thinking her hand shot in the air, interrupting the teacher mid-sentence, as her classmates around her began to send questioning glances.
A blush dared to heat up her cheeks, but she forced the feeling back focusing on the fact that she couldn't sit still any longer. It felt like the action would drive her mad. Izuka couldn't figure out what would cause Shigaraki to feel such an intense emotion, but if she didn't figure out how to make it stop, she would literally go crazy. On top of that, she had been purposefully trying to block her connection with Kacchan, not wanting him to get even a whiff of the emotions swirling around inside of her. It was another, she loathed to admit it, lie, or at best an omission, but she felt the need to keep it a secret. It wasn't her emotions, and all she wanted to do was make both Shigaraki, and Kacchan, comfortable. Izuka doubted Shigaraki would like it if Kacchan knew what he was feeling, and Izuka knew it would only upset Bakugo if he knew that she could feel them so clearly. Far clearer than she had been able to feel Kacchan's in days.
It was a mess.
Her life was such a mess.
She was overdue for a therapy session with Aikawa-san.
Perhaps Izuka should ditch the rest of class and go see the therapist in her office. She knew Aikawa would tell Aizawa and she would be excused, but she didn't want to worry anyone, nor did she want them to think she couldn't handle school. Was it something that could wait until after her last class? Should she just go to the bathroom, forcefully calm herself, and then go back to class?
Another wave of agitation, louder, stronger than before, washed over her. Fingers dug into the skin at her neck, the urge overwhelming, and not like her. With a gasp she yanked her hand away, allowing it to fall to her side, as she came to a stop in the middle of the hallway. It took several calming breaths to disentangle her emotions from Shigaraki's. To figure out what she was feeling, and what he was projecting onto her. Once she successfully did that it was easier to breathe and to reach out toward the connection that even made feeling this possible.
If they continued going the way it was Izuka knew she wouldn't be able to go back to class or manage to do anything until he calmed down, and she wasn't sure when that would be.
No, all she wanted to do was help him.
Going purely by instinct, not caring that she was still in the middle of the hallway, Izuka reached out, mentally searching for what bound them together. Success was met with warming under her skin, as if her soul could manifest physically for her to touch, as she gripped onto it tightly, sending her own feelings of calm, and reassurance. She didn't know what was going on, but that didn't matter, calming him was her sole focus. She only hoped that she could manage to do this right and that he reacted toward her in a positive way.
A sudden explosion of sensations engulfed her, dragging her down, as it overwhelmed and threatened to overtake her. Izuka felt as her legs shook before all awareness of the building around her faded away, being replaced with darkness, and unfamiliar voices. Her mind felt fuzzy as if she wasn't in complete control. It caused fear to ripple through her mind. She didn't like feeling out of control, of knowing that her actions weren't her own, and this was triggering. Only, before she could completely lose any sense of control over her emotions, the darkness began to lighten, showing a blurry, but lighter room, decidedly a warehouse, and not the high school. One she wasn't familiar with at all. This didn't help that sense of panic, but being able to see, helped to calm her.
Where was she?
How did she get here?
She felt her body move, no, not her body, she wasn't the one in control.
Though things were blurry, Izuka thought she recognized a figure, a girl off to her right, Toga.
Why was she anywhere close to Toga?
A man, one she had never seen before, began to walk closer. His aura was dark, Izuka could sense the irritation flaring under her skin, an itch digging into her mind, one that she wished to remove. This was unfamiliar. Why did she feel this way? Was it the man in front of her?
"You need direction to achieve your goals." The stranger lifted his gloved hand. "And I have a plan."
Blinking, Izuka tried to focus on what was going on. She could figure out how she got here, and where here exactly was, later. This man in front of her was threatening, it made her want to tense, but her body didn't follow her commands.
It wasn't her body to command.
"I didn't come here today because I planned to join you." His words held an undertone of a threat. Izuka felt the emotions flutter past her consciousness. They were doused in unease, caution, and the same anger that she had begun to associate with Shigaraki.
Was she witnessing what Shigaraki was seeing?
"You brought this idiot here without knowing his intentions, Twice," sounded a strained voice, lined with irritation. Izuka felt the way her consciousness shifted at the sound, interest, and fear, not for herself, but for him, leaked through. She could feel how he wanted to clear the space the man was occupying violently, how that itch he felt drove the emotion forward, but most importantly he seemed to have realized the danger this man posed for himself and his group.
"In order to execute my design, I need money. Unfortunately, there aren't many people looking to invest in some obsolete, small-time Yakuza. Now, your group, on the other hand, has widespread name recognition. Put yourself under me." He held out his hand. Izuka felt the way Shigaraki twitched mentally, refusing to show what he was truly feeling outwardly. "Make me your new leader, and I'll show you exactly how to use the right tools."
"Leave." The word was hissed, filled with malice, as he commanded the other to disappear. His emotions surrounded her, swirling dangerously, as he felt his time had been wasted. She could sense thoughts pouring in, his, not her own. They were fuzzier than the picture around her, like she was trying to see, and hear, from far away. There was something else he would rather be doing. Someone else he wanted to see. This man was taking away time to be finding a way to do that, but Izuka found it hard to place who exactly that was.
Her attention was broken away from his internal thoughts as Shigaraki focused back on the happenings of what was going on around him. Magne, someone she knew simply by name, had spent very little time around and rushed forward, attacking, but in the next second blood sprayed across the room. Izuka felt herself shrink back away from the carnage, mentally trying to escape the gory scene, but she was stuck, witnessing the same horror that Shigaraki was. If she had been physically there, instead of some kind of mental meld with her soulmate, Izuka was sure she would be hyperventilating.
There was blood. Blood everywhere, coating the walls, and floor, and though it was far away, and vague, she felt like there had been a drop on Shigaraki's hand. She wasn't completely connected to it, but the horror that rose up, panic settling in, felt like a tsunami that crushed her and dragged Shigaraki down with her.
His body tensed, as a foreign sensation overwhelmed him, it wasn't his own horror he was feeling, that terrified blindness was something he had grown numb to long ago. The scene in front of him didn't cause fear, but a fit of intense anger, as one of his comrades had been killed, effortlessly, and easily, without the man in front of him even breaking a sweat. One moment she was there, and the next she was gone.
Shigaraki shoved back the strange emotions that flooded him, focusing on the danger in front of him, and that clawing urge to rid the world of his presence.
He moved forward, reaching, only for the panic to fade to make way for caution that wasn't his own, a worry that didn't come from him but was tinted in sunshine, and unease. It felt familiar, a presence that Shigaraki couldn't forget, that brought on a calm, and urge that no one had ever caused him to feel before. His head snapped up, ruby eyes frantically bouncing around the abandoned warehouse, looking for the girl he expected to be nearby, only to come up short.
She wasn't here.
So, why could he sense her, as if she was standing right next to him?
A shot of awareness caused his body to react automatically as he caught the glimpse of Mr. Compress moving to attack the enemy. It was as if Izuka was urging him to stop the man before he could end up like Magne. He didn't hesitate in rushing forward, barely reaching him, and narrowly avoiding them both exploding, as something struck Compress, and bounced off the hand on his shoulder. Shigaraki reached out, his fingers latching around a glove, disintegrating it, and causing the man to back off quickly, allowing Shigaraki and Compress to retreat to a safe distance.
The aura of sunshine, and fear, abruptly disappeared, leaving him feeling far too lonely, and in a messed-up situation by himself.
Izuka, herself, wasn't sure what caused the abrupt departure, just that she had lost whatever connection she had with Shigaraki and was flung back into her own headspace. She could feel as her feet moved along, on autopilot, as a foreign pressure gripped her hand. It didn't bring on a feeling of warmth and tingles like when Katsuki held her hand, which told her it wasn't him. Instinctively, still running on the adrenaline of what she had just witnessed, not being able to escape the bloody walls, Izuka reacted without thinking. Her quirk activated, casting a warning in green light, the only thing that told the person who was guiding her that danger was nearby before she attacked.
Still dazed, and confused, she only used a small percentage, enough that when she struck out, the hit forced the guy away from her, sliding him across the ground as he hit the floor hard, but it also sent her sliding backward. Her balance was off, the control she normally held, was non-existent, and all she could sense was the way open-air suddenly welcomed her.
Had she been that close to the staircase before?
How long had the boy been leading her away before she came back to her senses?
Green eyes widened in panic as she made to protect herself, her mind sluggish and slow, and refused to come up with a solution to save herself. Instead, saving came in the form of what looked like tentacles wrapping around her waist, and carefully dragging her up into the air, away from the steps, and safely back into the hallway. Confusion had her following the odd sight back to its source. The boy who she now recognized had been the one leading her.
Izuka was coming to the realization that she may have acted rashly, high on adrenaline, and the situation she had just left. She was at school, the poor boy probably stumbled across her unresponsive body, and was only trying to help.
The tentacles left her body, shrinking until they turned back into fingers, and all Izuka could do was stare in fascination at the quirk in front of her. Numerous questions sprung forward, wishing to know more about his quirk, and how it worked. She hadn't seen anything like it before, but she held back, at the sudden display of nerves and anxiety he was displaying toward her.
Moments before he had looked confident, and determined, caught up in the action of keeping her from tumbling down the staircase, but now he was the complete opposite. He shrunk in on himself, his head hanging, and Izuka was certain she could see the dark cloud hanging over his head.
It made her feel bad. Somehow she was certain that was her fault. Probably for attacking him. What if he thought she was uncomfortable or scared of him?
"I'm sorry!" she blurted out. "I got caught up in my thoughts, and when I came to I reacted without thinking."
"I came across you standing blankly in the middle of the hall, and when you didn't respond to my questions, I thought it was best to take you to recovery girl. I'm sorry for holding your hand without permission, but I didn't want to leave you standing there alone, and we weren't far from Recovery Girl."
Izuka felt even more terrible for her actions as she listened to him stumble over his words. Anxiety leaked from every crevice as he spoke. Self-doubt and unsureness. All he had been trying to do was help her, and she attacked him.
"It's my fault," Izuka tried to reassure him. "You were just trying to be nice! And do the right thing! I'm the weirdo that just stopped in the middle of the hall. I'm sure you were just worried something was wrong with me." And honestly, what wasn't wrong with her right now? Anyone who knew her from the news would probably think she had something mentally messed up with her, and her little stunt probably didn't help those feelings. "Thank you for saving me!" Adding on even more awkwardness, Izuka found herself bowing slightly at him in her panic.
The older boy seemed to stiffen before unexpectedly spinning on his heel and leaning his head on the wall opposite of him. She could hear mumbling coming from him. Izuka caught a snippet of words that sounded like he recognized her from the news and had grown worried at her unresponsiveness. It only made her feel worse and cemented in her mind that he thought something was wrong with her.
"I'm sorry for worrying you." Her voice grew tinier as she continued to speak, and anxiety of her own began to creep in. "And for attacking you." If he grew angry or upset about her actions she could easily get in trouble if he decided to tell anyone of what had happened, and how he found her. It was sure to cause panic for the teachers and her therapist. Izuka wasn't sure that she wanted to get into the reason why she had been just standing listlessly for anyone to run into. "I hope you're not upset with me!"
She tried to catch his eye, but the boy only buried his head deeper into the wall avoiding looking at her.
"It's fine," he finally muttered lowly. Izuka was unsure of what to do, she began to fidget, wondering if maybe it would be better to say her goodbyes quickly and head back to class before she could make matters worse. Only her worry over the situation and how he was acting kept her from following those plans. She watched anxiously as he seemed to pull himself together before he finally pulled himself from the wall. He still wouldn't look her in the eye, but he turned to face her.
"Are you okay?" It would seem the heroics from before had won out over the anxiety. "You were unresponsive for a good five minutes."
"Yes!" She winced at how loudly her voice sounded but the situation was awkward and had only proceeded to cause her to become tense. "I don't normally do that." This was said more calmly than she felt as she tried to regain control over her emotions.
She truly was overdue for a therapy session.
"You don't need to go see Recovery Girl?" He sounded uncertain, unwilling to believe her immediately.
"It's hard to explain," she started, knowing she had to say something, or he would keep pressing the issue. That was the last thing she needed. Izuka was a terrible liar and decided to go with almost the complete truth. "It had to do with my soulmate bond. It's been demanding as of recently. I've found myself getting lost in thought easily."
This she hoped would be enough of an explanation that he would drop it. Most did once soulmate bonds were brought up. They were after all a sensitive, and intimate subject that most tried to politely keep their noses out of.
He still looked doubtful but as predicted once soulmates were mentioned he backed down.
"If you're certain." He still seemed worried, and uncertain, and as she went to walk away he stopped her. "I should still walk you back to your class. Just to be certain." His voice had started off as commanding but with each word it seemed he lost whatever boldness he had been feeling. It was strange to see, but Izuka could only nod and allowed him to follow her back.
She didn't notice the way he watched her from the corner of his eye. How the worry never seemed to leave the stare. Nor did she notice the way protectiveness leaked through. Thanking him once more Izuka slipped into the classroom ignoring the stares from her classmates and the burning gaze of Kacchan.
子猫
Izuka kept what happened resolutely to herself not daring to utter a word to Bakugo, or Aikawa. She decided to bring up the weird vision to them later and instead focused on the emotions that were leaking through the bond, and how she felt. It was easier to deal with and didn't make her head hurt when she thought about it.
The talk seemed to help and the next day when it was time to practice their moves once more, Izuka found herself focusing easier. The emotions were still there, leaking through the connection, but they weren't demanding, grabbing at her attention.
No, that was an entirely different person, whom Izuka had spent the last ten minutes ignoring, and being hyper-aware of. Everything in her body was high-strung as if it would snap at a moment's notice, and all it would take was one wrong move.
Aikawa stood by her sensei, her eyes carefully taking in the room, as she watched over Midoriya and the girl's body language.
Today was the first day that All Might had been allowed to help out in class.
It was a tentative start, the man kept to the students closer to the ground, away from Izuka, who had been placed higher up on the makeshift mountain the students practiced on. He would attempt to stay the entire lesson but would be asked to leave early if Izuka began to show signs of losing control. The girl in question had been coping fairly decently. There was anxiety, and upon first spotting him, she could feel the way her mind tried to slip away, making room for nightmares but she battled it back. The mantra of him being Toshi, a protector and mentor, echoed repeatedly in her mind as she went through the motions of her new attack.
She ignored the way his image would ripple as muscles tried to form where only sharp angles now lay.
It was only Toshi.
The mantra was repeated endlessly as she moved through the motions of practicing what she had dubbed, One For All: Full Cowl. Above her, close by, she could hear as Kacchan practiced, explosions singing loudly above her, as on occasion small bits of rock would rain down on her. She heard a shout of victory after a loud crack echoed across the building causing her head to snap up on instinct. The sound of explosions had become normal, almost as if it was just white noise, but the distinct sound of something cracking, as if breaking apart, was new, and worrisome. She caught as rocks began to slide, falling from place, first just a tiny crumble before a bigger piece broke away from the rest. Her eyes widened as she spotted who was right underneath.
Her breath caught in her throat. Time seemed to slow down.
In front of her, her vision blurred, two scenes playing out as she watched in terror. Blood flooded her mind's eye, spraying across the rocks as the image of the rock falling, and Toshi underneath it wavered to All Might, and a cold, cruel laugh.
"Hey!" hollered Katsuki. "Watch out!"
The familiar, and very much alive, voice pulled her out from the horror she had been dragged into.
The scene came back into clear focus, the rock falling, closer than it ever should have gotten to the man Izuka had without a doubt thought of as a father. Even if her mind tried to twist it, she knew, without a doubt, that she still felt that way. There were just times when it was harder to remember.
Her body moved on its own accord, rational thought left behind, as she reacted on pure instinct. Green lightning lit up the area, shining across her skin, as she zipped across the space between her and Toshi. Spinning around she struck out with her leg, crashing into the rock, as it exploded into pebbles, raining down on Toshi, and bouncing off Aizawa, who had been in the act of reacting himself. Falling to the floor Izuka caught herself easily before standing, breathing heavily, as her hand came up to push the palm of her hand into her forehead, as a headache began to savagely pound away behind her eyes. She hadn't been this close to Toshi since the night she had fought him, and Izuka was finding it hard to be nearby.
The shadows were threatening to engulf and drag her down.
Toshinori made a move to step closer, to comfort, before he pulled himself back. He knew that it wouldn't be welcomed, no matter how much he wished to help, it was better for him to allow someone else to take his place.
Aikawa was there moments after, standing in front of the girl, as she began to ask how she was feeling and to breathe. The words were whispered, kept to just the two of them, as classmates began to trickle down, muttering in curiosity, and excitement over what had just happened. Loud voices greeted them as the first person, Kirishima, made it down to them, singing praises, before another joined in. This one was hesitant, seeming uncertain, and worried as he noticed the state his friend was in.
"Alright, Midoriya!" Kirishima yelled out.
"Hey, are you okay, Iz," Kaminari asked. He took a step closer but felt at a loss of what to do as he eyed the therapist who stood close by and was still muttering softly to the girl.
Above them, smoke appeared after what sounded like a blast ripped through the air. A very irritated and annoyed-looking Bakugo landed with a muted thud before pushing his way through the now crowded area. A few people who were nearby had come over to congratulate Midoriya on her new technique, a mixture of what she had already been working on but were quickly realizing the mess the girl had fallen into. Bakugo glared, narrowing his eyes at the few stragglers who hadn't walked away, making them quickly depart.
"I'm fine," Izuka automatically muttered as the angry ash-blonde made his way over. Bakugo wasn't believing it, he could feel the way the bond tugged at him, emotions of unease leaking through. She was pulling through, quicker than he expected, but she wasn't fine either.
Turning to glare daggers at the shattered rock Bakugo felt himself snap as he yelled at All Might. "Be careful! You can't just fucking walk around without being cautious." He was pissed, taking his anger out on All Might. There was anger toward the man, he disliked knowing that it was All Might that had placed her in this panicked mode, but he was also angry at himself. If he had been a little more cautious then she never would have been forced to interact with All Might in any way.
The mixed emotions swirled around inside of him as Aikawa had All Might leave the premises and walk Izuka back toward her spot to practice. It would seem that they would keep on with the training, and he watched as they left, noticing the way All Might slunk out the door after glancing at her one last time.
Bakugo could feel the irritation boiling under his skin. There was far too much these days that he was trying to deal with. It pushed him to the limits of what he was comfortable emotionally dealing with.
As he watched Izuka return to her spot he watched as she grounded herself. Aikawa standing nearby, watching the girl closely, as she returned to training, trying to act as if nothing had happened.
His fingers curled into fists, shaking slightly, as he gritted his teeth.
He had to be there for her. He had fucked up so much in the past. He was determined to make it up to her, but he still found himself falling flat.
After all, how did one just accept, and pretend like everything is alright when their soulmate admits to having another connected to them?
Katsuki could feel himself rapidly nearing his breaking point.
We're getting so much closer to a happy ending for her and All Might! I promise. Just hold on a little longer. They will be back to almost normal soon! Healing is a process.
It was one of my favorite scenes to write. Especially since I wanted to try to keep it as close to canon as possible. I mean she saved him even though she was terrified! Izuka is going through some stuff but she still cares for him.
And OMG I really miss having Shigaraki around. Can you notice?
Hope to hear your opinions on how this chapter went! Are we excited about the exam? It should be in the next one!