AUTHOR'S NOTE: This one is longer and a little bit different of what I usually write. That's why I decided to split the chapter in two. This is only the first part and the second one is only partially written. Hope you enjoy it.
A TRUTH TO BE TOLD…
I
Selflessness
"So, maybe Nabiki is right after all and I am a masochist.
Maybe Sayuri wasn't kidding when she said that sometimes I'm too good for my own good.
And maybe, just maybe… I'm starting to forget too much about myself…
I…
I feel like I don't want to deal with me anymore.
With me and my feelings…
Stubborn feelings that won't die no matter what...
With me and my thinking… and my hurting… and my sadness…
and my doubts.
I feel like all is left for me is going through the motions… breath, smile and finally walk away as if I didn't feel empty.
I shouldn't feel empty. I should be okay, happy even… and so I'll try to convince myself I am… and so maybe, someday I'll be for real. And I won't care… and I'll be as happy as I want to be for him. For him, who IS happy now, for him who has someone, finally.
As for now, there's nothing to do but pretend and trying to fool myself into thinking I can do it.
And I'll be the friend I want to be.
I'll be supportive.
I'll like her… because he likes her.
I'll try. I'm trying.
……
Yes, maybe I really AM a masochist."
She was the only one left in the room. Everyone had gone outside a long time ago to enjoy the warm evening, the starts and their own company. It was a nice party, HER party, or at least a party made for her. Everyone had come to say goodbye and wish her luck, to share a moment, a last moment before she left the next morning… she was grateful for it.
"Good Luck in College Akane!"
The girl read the banner and smiled ruefully. She remembered her packed luggage upstairs, dropped by her bed in her somehow empty room. Nostalgically, she thought about her sister's cooking and her father's bawls, realizing she was soon leaving it all. Amused, she thought about Nabiki's pictures and her unorthodox way of always getting what she wanted. And she also thought about P'chan, her disappeared piggy pet, knowing for sure she was about to give up on ever finding him again.
"Good Luck in College" She mumbled. There were a lot of things to look back to. Yes, look back to, even though she was still there; there was Furinkan and it's horde of perverts, her very good friends, her old yellow gi that had been changed for a brand new one, her dojo and it's wooden walls; the practice dummy she, a long time ago, had secretly named after Ranma… and then there was Ranma of course, always Ranma.
Akane sighed deeply, berating herself for even thinking about crying. No more tears. You're done been sad. She thought and again promised herself she'll keep trying to stop being miserable and start being happy from now on. She deserved it after all.
Sometimes she thought her situation was so bad that it was funny.
The girl was starting a new beginning, a new life; and she couldn't bring herself to be excited about it. For her, no matter what she did, it was only the beginning of the end. And end she decided a long time ago she wanted or at least needed. I'm screwed. She thought bitterly amused by her situation.
"Akane?" A candid voice called from behind her.
The girl turned around, immediately changing her expression. A bright smile filled her face while acknowledging her oldest sister. "Yes Kasumi?"
"What are you doing here, honey?" She questioned. "I've been looking for you."
I'm just here, sulking. Akane thought and then smoothly ignored the question. "Why? Did you need me?"
"Well…" Kasumi started worriedly. "I just didn't know where you were, you disappeared."
Yes, the girl knew it must have been odd missing her own party and going AWOL for a couple of hours. But she didn't really feel like celebrating "I was gone for just a few minutes," she lied.
Kasumi frowned. "Are you okay?" She asked a little bit frantic.
The girl mirrored her sister's expression. "Yes, I am." She answered surprised by the question. "Are you okay, Kasumi?" She then asked noticing Kasumi's worried face.
"I… I.."
"Is there something wrong?"
"Haven't you…"
"What?" restlessly asked the girl. "What Kasumi? What is it?"
"What she is trying to say is…" started a new arrived voice from behind. "Haven't you seen that little jerk, Ranma, yet?"
Akane looked at her other sister oddly. "What do you mean Nabiki?" She asked confused, and then she noticed the pitiable look Kasumi was giving her.
"Don't you know?" Asked the oldest girl. "We thought you disappeared because you saw them."
"Them? What do you mean?What IS going on?" Urged Akane looking at both of her sisters.
"Ranma brought a date," Nabiki answered angrily.
II
Ice
I'm not one to let the people I care about get hurt.
Yes, believe it or not. No matter how much of an Ice Queen I am.
I would not stand passively while I see their hearts get broken and stepped on. While I see them being tore apart by something, by SOMEONE.
NO, I would not do nothing.
When someone messes with my people, it messes with me.
It becomes something personal.
Something someone will regret.
You really don't want to mess with Nabiki Tendo and her family.
You really don't want to hurt them.
Not only did he arrive late but he also brought a surprise with him, a very nasty surprise.
"What in the world?" mumbled Nabiki with an awestruck expression when she saw Ranma and the girl holding his hand.
It was unbelievable!
Nabiki blinked, making sure she wasn't seeing any visions.
"Boss?" asked the scrawny girl whom she had been talking to about business just before Ranma and company caught her sight. "Are you okay?"
Nabiki didn't answer, her initial surprise hastily wearing off leaving only anger instead. The mercenary girl narrowed her eyes. "That little jerk," she said with venom and then waved her associate off. Seeing her boss's expression, the girl didn't hesitate before leaving.
Nabiki was feeling mad, mad and insulted. What the hell did Ranma think he was doing parading around with a girl in her little sister's faraway party? Yes, Ranma was a stupid oblivious guy, or at least Nabiki thought so. He could be the biggest jerk without even noticing… but there was no way in hell he didn't know what he was doing then.
"Nabiki!" A somehow frantic Kasumi interrupted her thoughts and the withering stare she was sending in the couple's general direction. Ranma was currently introducing his date to his mother! The nerve of that scumbag was unbelievable!
"Yes." She said coldly.
"Have you seen Akane?"
That caught her attention. "No… no. Actually, I haven't." She answered starting to get worried. Akane! How could she not think about her little sister… if she already had seen Ranma…
"Oh God… do you know if she…" Started Kasumi but was soon interrupted.
"No, no, I don't know. Do you think she saw them already?"
"I don't know. I can't find her anywhere. And I can't think of any other reason that she'd left her own party. I don't… " Kasumi shook her head. "I just hope she hasn't…"
"The nerve of that guy! To bring a date here! Akane's last day in town!" Said Nabiki angrily.
"It's his girlfriend." Added Kasumi quietly while thanking god her father had gone to bed early and was missing the whole thing.
"What did you say?" Nabiki's eyes were as wide as saucers.
"That's how he introduced her…"
"TO YOU?" Ended a shocked Nabiki, "He introduced her to YOU?" Kasumi only nodded. "As his girlfriend!"
"Yes…" answered the older girl while biting her lower lip. Her usually cool mannered sister was seething and it was unnerving. "I'm worried Nabiki. We've got to find Akane."
The fuming girl nodded while narrowing her eyes. "Go look for her Kasumi… I need to have a word with Ranma first." And she took off towards the boy's direction.
III
Affront
It's not like I thought they'd love me when they meet me.
I'm not that naïve…
I was sure, though, they would at least give me a chance…
You know, before jumping to conclusions, before hating me.
I guess I was just hoping it wouldn't be so bad.
I was wrong, of course.
At least I've learned something new.
You can't take anything for sure when it has to do with Ranma in anyway.
This is starting to become more than I can handle.
This is too damn much for me…
"That went well…" Said Ray with irony while looking at Ranma's departing mother.
"I'm sorry…" started Ranma. "I really don't know what got into her. She's not usually like that. She's always really nice with everyone but pops." He said frowning thoughtfully. It was the first time he had seen her mother being anything but polite with people.
Ray looked hurt after hearing this and Ranma noticed. "I mean… maybe she wasn't feeling well or something." He added lamely.
"Yeah…" mumbled the girl, unconvinced.
The boy looked at her worriedly.
It had been a hard night so far. Ever since his and Ray's arrival everyone had acted either as a jerk or o bitch, or sometimes even both. Shampoo and the old ghoul had even managed to throw the witch factor into the mix. It was amazing how well that girl handled Japanese when it came to call people hussies and all kind of it's synonymous.
Even if Shampoo was the only person in the party that had actually insulted Ray -yet- it was obvious that everyone wanted to do it. Not a single soul had been nice so far. Not even Kasumi -who kept quiet and awkwardly excused herself immediately after he introduced them- or his mother who had been as cold as ice. And they both were his last resort! Ranma was mortified. In a nutshell the whole night had been hellish. Just as he promised it wouldn't be.
"You still haven't met everyone." Ranma tried to reassure her.
"I guess you're right." And Ray gave him a faint smile, telling herself that it wasn't his fault people were acting the way they were acting.
"Oh, look at the happy couple!" A cold ironic voice, suddenly interrupt them.
Ray looked up to find a tall, short-haired, attractive woman standing behind Ranma. She had a certain something about her that made Ray instantly anxious about leaving. Then Ranma turned around, "Hey Nabiki." He greeted with a blank face.
"Ranma" Nabiki nodded in her usually "means business" manner, and then she glanced at the girl standing next to him with disdain. "May I have a word with you?"
The boy looked at her strangely. "Sure…" he drawled.
Nabiki stayed quiet and then she stared coldly at meaningfully at his date. Ray felt attacked, immediately noticing the tacit "get out of here." this Nabiki girl was giving her.
Ranma noticed the stare but he, of course, as oblivious as he always was, misunderstood everything. "Oh…" he started nervously. "I'm sorry. Nabiki, this is Ray. And Ray this is Nabiki, Akane's sister."
Thad did it.
Nabiki was usually a very controlled person, but there where always limits. "Ranma…" she started with content rage. "I'm not interested in meeting the trash you brought here."
Ray gasped and suddenly felt smaller than she had ever felt before.
"I'm only interested in telling you to take it outside where it belongs." Nabiki finished with disgust. Ranma was too shocked to respond. "So do it fast." Said the Tendo girl just before and upset Ray started to hurriedly walk away.
Ranma turned slowly and then tried to go after the fleeing girl as his conscious was asking. "I guess, it can do it by itself," said Nabiki with a condescending smirk.
The boy turned around frowning. "Why did you do that?" He asked distressed. "You don't even know her!"
Nabiki narrowed her eyes. "Why? You're asking why? You're unbelievable Ranma."
The boy shook his head and tried to leave again but Nabiki stopped him. "How dare you…" she said with venom, practically on his face. "This is her last day in town… how dare you to hurt her like this." Ranma looked at her without understanding. "You'd better not stay around this house after she leaves Ranma… you're not welcomed here anymore." She finished.
Ranma, confused, didn't respond and left to go after Ray.
It wasn't long before he found her slowly walking towards the Dojo.
"Ray!" He called and she hurried her pace after hearing him.
"Ray, wait."
When he caught her the girl turned around, hot tears running free from her eyes. "You said you wouldn't let me get hurt." She accused hotly. The boy winced and she took off without looking back once, probably to hide at the back of the dojo, where there was no party, until her tears stop.
Ranma was left alone and troubled. "I'll never do anything just because she asks again." He muttered mortified while asking himself why did everything had to always get so messed up.
IV
Doubt
"Lately I've had this doubt… this fleeting thought… this thing I feel stuck in my throat and keeps coming and coming, and bothering me and making me… question… question me.
You see, I usually think someone up there is screwing with my life, or whatever… That was the only explanation I had for things to always go so terribly wrong. It was the only thing I could think of.
But sometimes lately…
I've been having this nagging feeling that maybe… just maybe is me doing it all…
That I am making mistakes… that I'm doing it all wrong. Whatever it is.
…
Really scary thought."
"Are you sure about this?" Asked Rei feeling rather insecure with the proposition she had just received.
"Totally," answered Ranma without hesitation.
The girl wasn't convinced, though. "It's just…," she started nervously.
"What? What's wrong?"
The girl hesitated again. There was something… off about their situation and it was getting harder and harder to just ignore it. She sighed. "I don't know… it's too fast"
"We met months ago."
"And we've been officially going out, what? Two seconds."
Ranma cocked an eyebrow. "Technically we've never gone out. You're afraid to be seen with me in public."
"Well I appreciate my life."
The boy frowned. "It's not like you're going to get killed for it."
"It's not like I'm safe If some of your crazy friends see us, either."
"It's that why you're so nervous about this?" asked Ranma narrowing his eyes.
Rei kept quiet. She could see he wasn't happy about it.
"You think it's dangerous." He stated with a huff. And then he had that fleeting thought that had been bothering lately.
"What did you want me to think with all the stories you've told me?"
"You'll be there with me. I wouldn't let you get hurt. You know that."
"Yes I know… still—"
"Look you don't have to go if you don't want to."
The girl sighed with relief. She didn't feel ready to assist a family function with her new… whatever Ranma had become in the last few weeks.
"But you'll have to meet them all eventually," he finished logically.
The girl cringed. "I know… but why does it have to be all of them at the same time?"
"It'll be easier that way. I'll introduce you to the craziest ones and then you can hang out with the nice ones." He gave her a goading smile. "Besides we won't stay long."
"I don't think it's appropriate… I mean, it's your ex's party."
"Akane is not my ex." He said, his voice cold. There went that fleeting thought again.
"You know what I mean."
"It was her idea." The boy stated with annoyance.
Ray gaped at him, having trouble grasping the concept of what he had just said. "What?"
"It was her idea. She told me I should bring you. She said it'll be nice to meet you before she leaves."
"You told HER about ME?" She asked surprised and somehow panicked.
Ranma rolled his eyes. "Actually, she told ME about you."
"Huh?"
"She said she saw me with a girl." And then he added somehow bitterly. "Said she was glad I found someone."
Ray cocked an eyebrow. This is not right, she thought. "Well, at least someone is glad." Definitely not right.
"Are you coming?" He asked sensing her change of mood and wanting to get over with it. That fleeting thought wasn't so fleeting anymore.
"She wants to meet me." Ranma nodded. "But… why?
"Don't ask me. Hey, you wanted to meet her to."
"Well, I was curious. I am curios." How couldn't she be?
Ranma shrugged in a boyish manner. "Maybe she is too."
"Yeah… maybe…" she trailed off.
"Soo… are you coming?"
Ray hesitated. "I guess I am." She deadpanned. Maybe it was time to put a face next to Akane's infamous name.
V
Reason
"So, yesterday I saw you with that girl again…"
"Oh…"
"You two are going well, huh?"
"I guess…"
…
…
"I'm glad for you… Ranma?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you think I could meet her?"
"What?"
"I'd like to meet her before I leave… you know…"
…
"You and I are friends or something like it, right?"
"Yes, we are."
"So she's my friend's girl. I'll like to meet her. I'm sure she's nice."
…
"Ranma?"
"I don't know where she is right now… And you're leaving tomorrow."
"Why don't you bring her tonight."
…
"Don't look at me as if I were crazy."
"Tonight It's your party."
"And she's invited."
"Look Akane… I don't know."
"Please?"
"Ranma brought a date." Said Nabiki and suddenly Akane understood why they were looking at her the way they were doing it.
"Oh… she's here already?" The blue haired girl asked without thinking and with some trepidation.
Nabiki and Kasumi looked at her with surprise. "You knew?" They both asked at the same time.
"I invited her. I asked Ranma to bring her."
"You invited her?"
The blue haired girl only nodded. "Where are they? I'm supposed to meet her."
Nabiki crossed her arms over her chest and gave a tired sigh. "They're probably gone. I'm sure they wouldn't stay around after hearing what I had to say."
Akane frowned looking at her sister. "What did you do Nabiki?"
"I told them to leave. How was I supposed to know it had been my masochist little sister's idea to invite the girl?" She asked with sarcasm.
"Oh god…" said Akane worriedly. "I have to find them." And then she walked hurriedly towards the door in search for them.
"Why are you doing this to yourself Akane?" asked the mercenary girl with something resembling sadness, by her side, Kasumi kept quiet not letting on what she was thinking. "Don't you think this is only twisting the knife."
"I'm not doing anything to myself." The younger Tendo girl replied coldly without stopping.
"Stop lying to yourself sister!" Yelled Nabiki long after her sister had disappeared by the door. "Not even you buy it." She then shook her head helplessly.
"I told you Akane must have had a good reason to want to leave," mumbled Kasumi with a sigh.
Nabiki closed her eyes and nodded with aversion. "She's just running away…" She said thoughtfully.
TO BE CONTINUED IN
…From the Heart
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