Disclaimer: No, I don't own Supernatural, or any of the characters. I don't make money off of my stories about them, blah blah don't sue blah blah. The usual.

A/N:

Thank you SO much to all my reviewers! It is such a great feeling to know that people are reading what I wrote and like it enough to comment! You guys are the best!

OK people get ready. We finally find out what's up with Sam (who does have a few secrets, but they are all inter-connected). Hooray! I've never wanted to kick one of my own characters for being so stubborn and tight-lipped before. But I still love him!

Oh yeah, and if you think there's not a little brotherly angst in a chapter this long, you're out of your mind. Please R&R! Thanks!

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The next few hours in the car were fairly quiet. Sam was mentally and physically exhausted, and Dean was happy to let him get some rest for once. While Sam slept, Dean spent most of the time thinking about what Sam had told him, little as it was. Mostly he was concentrating on what Sam had meant when he said he had to go to this town, and why Sam kept mentioning protecting him. Especially since it was clear Sam had not meant to let those two things slip. Not to mention Dean continued to get a hot ball of fear in his gut whenever he thought about how Sam had just passed out with almost no warning.

All Dean knew was he was not going to make the same mistake he did before of trying to explain away Sam's behavior or pretend something wasn't wrong. This time they were going to talk, whether Sam liked it or not. He was briefly amused as he thought about how it was usually Sam that wanted to talk, and that he was the one that tried to avoid touchy subjects. But the amusement fled as fast as it had come when he realized how serious this must be, for their roles to be reversed.

He passed a highway sign noting that motels and food were available at the next exit, and decided to stop there for the night. They could have continued going as they were fairly close to their destination, but Dean had a feeling they needed to have their talk before they actually got there. As he slowed the car down to make the exit, Sam began to stir. He yawned and looked blearily around at their surroundings.

"Are we there already?"

Dean shook his head. "Almost. But it's pretty late; I figured we could stop here for the night. We probably wouldn't be able to do anything tonight anyway." Not that I have a clue what we're actually here to do. Well, that's going to change real soon. Dean pulled into the parking lot of the first motel he saw with a 'Vacant' sign. "Stay here for a minute. Mr. Jenners is going to get us a room for the night." Sam frowned as Dean mentioned the fictitious name.

"Mr. Jenners, huh? I thought you were using Alex Tellen right now."

Dean grinned. "I like to mix it up." He hopped out of the car and headed for the front office. Sam shook his head in supposed disapproval, but once Dean was out of sight, he allowed himself a small smile.

Dean came back a few minutes later with a key and started the car again. Sam looked confused.

"What are you doing?"

"What do you think? We don't have any food and I'm starving. We can get settled after we eat somewhere."

The idea of food made Sam nauseous. But it also gave him an idea. "I'm not hungry. Just drop me off at the room before you go."

Dean snorted. "Yeah, right. Like I'm going to fall for that. Listen to me, we are not going to be separated until I find out what is going on with you, got that?" Sam's face told him all he needed to know when Dean looked at him. "Yeah, that's what I thought. Forget it, you're not taking off without me. But if you're not hungry, fine. I'll just call in an order for pizza." He swung the car back around and parked near their room.

A short time later, Dean was fed and happy after devouring most of a large pepperoni pizza. Sam looked on in disgust. "I can't believe you can eat that much."

"Hey, I'm a growing boy," Dean argued.

"Right. Well, you're going to be growing in the wrong direction if you continue to eat like that." Sam flashed him a beatificsmile.

Dean saw it and without warning, got a lump in his throat. He hadn't realized how long it had been since he'd last seen Sam smile like that and tease him. Just one more thing I missed, he berated himself. Well, no more.

"OK Sam, time's up. Start talking."

Sam swallowed, a knot of apprehension in his stomach. He looked down at his hands. "Talk about what?"

Dean shot him a "you've got to be kidding" look. "About what? Oh, geez, let's see Sammy. There's world peace, daffodils, kittens. All great subjects. Except I know a better one. How bout we talk about you? Yeah, I think we should go with that. You can start with your visions and why you passed out, not to mention why you're trying to leave me behind, and whatever else is going on with you!" He had started shouting by the end.

Sam tried to hush him. "Quiet down, would you! There's other people staying here, you know!"

"Do you really think I care?" Dean yelled. He saw Sam's stricken face and lowered his voice. "Sam, you're my brother. You know I would do anything for you. Please, you have to tell me what's happening. Let me help," he pleaded.

Sam knew he was out of time, but still tried to resist. "Can't it at least wait until after tomorrow? We could wander around, get some information from the locals first." Dean gave him a look that clearly said that was not going to happen. He tried again. "Then just give me till the morning, ok? I'm really not up to this after everything that's happened today." He knew it wasn't fair to play on Dean's sympathy, but he would take whatever worked at this point. Plus it was actually true. And if he could just get Dean to agree to this, he had one last plan. He saw Dean hesitate, and sensed he was wavering. "Please," Sam begged.

Dean couldn't say no to Sam when he put it that way. He never could. He finally gave a short nod. "Ok Sam, but that's it. We're not leaving this room until we talk in the morning." Sam gave a quiet sigh of relief.

Dean noticed the sigh but didn't comment. He didn't even blink an eye when shortly after, Sam said he was tired and was going to go to bed. Dean just said that sounded like a good idea, and that he would do the same so they could get an early start.

An hour later, Sam sat up in bed and looked over at Dean. His brother was laying on his side, taking deep, even breaths. Finally, he's asleep. He knew Dean was going to be furious, but he also knew this was his last chance to go without him. He carefully got out of bed, thankful that Dean was a heavy sleeper. As he stood up, he got dizzy for a moment and felt a bad headache coming on, but refused to acknowledge either. He decided he would change clothes once he got outside the room to reduce chances of Dean hearing him, and grabbed his bag. He briefly hesitated, looking back at his brother. Sorry, Dean. He slung the bag over his shoulder and headed for the door.

Just as he reached for the doorknob, a shoe came flying across his head and hit the door. Startled, he looked behind him. Dean was sitting up in bed and glaring at him.

"Don't even think about it." Sam realized too late that Dean hadn't been asleep. He'd heard everything, and had in fact been waiting for Sam to try to pull something like this. He looked to Sam like he was ready to bolt over and place himself in front of the door if he had to. His next words proved Sam was right.

"Sam, I swear, if I have to knock you out to get you to stay put tonight, I will." Sam started to try to come up with an explanation, but didn't get one word out before Dean continued in a deadly serious voice. "Don't tempt me, Sam. Or, if you prefer, we can always talk about what's going on now instead of waiting until tomorrow morning."

Sam pouted. He knew when he was beat. "Fine." He dropped the bag with a loud thud and walked back over to his bed and laid down, facing away from Dean.

Dean nodded to himself, satisfied that Sam wasn't going anywhere. Then he smiled slightly. He had to hand it to Sam; he was almost as stubborn as Dean was. But he's not getting his way this time. I don't care if I have to stay up all night to make sure of it.

In the other bed, Sam was sure he wasn't going to be able to get to sleep. His headache was worse, and he had never been able to sleep well since Jess died in any case. But he was wrong. For once, he fell asleep quickly. And like usual, had the dream.

He was standing in the middle of a thick pure white fog and couldn't see more than a foot ahead of him. "Dean," he called out. There was no answer. "Dean!" Suddenly the fog parted a little ahead of him. He looked forward eagerly, hoping to see his brother. Instead, a little girl of no more than six years appeared before him. She was a beautiful child, with long black hair and green eyes. She looked at him curiously but without any fear.

"Hello." She stepped closer as she greeted him. "I'm Tasha. Are you new here?"

"I guess," Sam replied uncertainly. "Umm, where am I exactly?"

The girl giggled. "Didn't you see the sign?" She pointed to behind Sam. He turned, and the dense fog parted behind him just enough for him to read a sign welcoming him to Faulk, Louisiana.

"Sorry," he said, smiling at the child. "Guess I missed that."

Tasha just laughed. "You should stay. It's nice here." A jump rope suddenly appeared on the ground. Her face lit with joy at seeing it. "This is my favorite thing!" She bent to pick it up and began skipping rope.

"I didn't use to be able to do this, you know," she confided to Sam.

"What? Skip rope? Why not?"

"I was really sick. The doctors all said I wasn't going to live for very much longer and I was confined to bed." She was very nonchalant in telling Sam this as she continued to play. However, his heart began to beat faster.

"Then how…" he began to ask.

She hurried to tell him. "I don't know. Just one day I was better. Like I said, it's nice here." But then her face became sad.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"You need to help them," she replied.

Sam was confused. "Who?" Tasha just pointed.

Sam looked in that direction, and all of a sudden the fog changed and it was a dark gray, almost black fog. The girl disappeared. "Wait," he called out. "Where did you go?" There was no response. He shivered. He didn't like this new fog. He heard voices crying out in pain but he couldn't tell where they were coming from. They seemed to be all around him. He walked forward slowly, but didn't see anyone.

"Sam?" He heard his name from behind him. He turned, and a woman in her early thirties was standing there. He didn't know her, but he recognized her. If the little girl had been grown, Sam imagined she would look exactly like this woman.

"Tasha?" No, that couldn't be right, he thought. Tasha was just a child. But at hearing the name, the woman's face became unbearably sad.

"No, I'm Josie. Tasha is my daughter." Well, that made sense at least. He was about to ask Josie more about Tasha, but she spoke first.

"Sam, you shouldn't be here. It's not safe." Her voice was urgent.

"Wait, how do you know my name?" Another thought occurred to him. "Do you know…"

"Yes," she interrupted. "I know what's wrong. And I know you are being pulled to come here, that you have a feeling someone here can help you. And he can, but…"

His heart leapt. "He can help? That's all I need to know."

She shook her head. "You're wrong. You need to know so much more. He would hurt you as well if you let him. And he will kill Dean if he comes here."

His breath caught. He was horrified. "Dean? Why would he kill Dean?"

Her eyes were sad. "Killing him would just be the beginning." She paused, and looked around. Her expression changed to utter fear. "I have to go. Please, remember what I said! It's not safe!"

"Wait! I don't understand. You said he can help me…" Sam was panicked. The woman was gone, and the black fog was closing in around him. He began to choke….

Sam woke up, gasping for air. His head felt like tiny spikes were being driven into it. He tried, but couldn't suppress a small moan.

"Sam?" Dean sat up. "Sam, you ok?" Sam didn't answer. He couldn't. The pain was almost unbearable. Dean quickly got up and moved over to Sam's bed. He sat down next to him and was astonished when Sam got up at the same time. "Sam, what are you…"

His question was answered as Sam raced over to the bathroom and was violently ill. Dean watched helplessly as Sam retched over and over. Once he was finally done, he collapsed on the cold bathroom floor. Dean went over to help him up.

"Leave me alone." Sam tried to be forceful, but his voice came out pitiful.

"I don't think so Sammy. C'mon, let's get you back to bed." He bent down and put an arm around Sam, helping him up. Sam let out a tiny whimper as they began to move out of the bathroom, and Dean felt the pain as if it was his own. "I know, Sam. I'm sorry. My bed is closer, okay? Let's just sit you down here." Dean sat down next to him and watched as Sam shivered and put his head down between his knees, his breath still coming in shortened gasps. Not knowing what else to do, Dean rubbed Sam's back and waited. After a few minutes, Sam's breathing evened out and he brought his head back up. He met Dean's eyes.

"Better now?" Dean asked. Sam nodded. "Want to tell me about it?" Sam hesitated, and Dean worried for a moment that Sam was going to try to shut him out again. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding when Sam began to speak.

"I guess it's time I do. Just…let me tell it my way, okay?" Dean agreed immediately, just relieved that they were finally going to get this out in the open. So Sam started out by telling him about the dream. He also told him that it varied sometimes, but the general issues were the same. Except that occasionally Josie would ask for his help before the dream ended. He took a breath after he finished, gathering his thoughts.

Dean was confused. "I guess I don't get it Sam. So in your dream, or vision, you feel a pull towards this town and it seems some people want you there to help them, but you don't know what they need help with? And who is this guy that can help you? And help you with what? Your visions?"

Sam shook his head. "I'm not sure what they need help with either, but the background voices are in agony. I have to help them. I figure we can do some more research once we get to the town to see if anyone can tell us something useful." He paused. "As for the guy, I don't know who he is. I need to find that out. But I know he's there. I don't know how, but I just do."

"So he can help with…what…stopping you from having visions? Or the pain that comes with them? Sam started to answer, but Dean cut him off. "Cause, you know, that would be fine with me."

"Dean…"

"I mean, I know you said once you didn't mind having them, because we could help people that we might not normally know about. But the pain really seems to be getting worse, and…"

"Dean, I…"

Dean was pacing. "I mean, it's just getting out of hand. The headaches seem to be staying with you longer, and now you've actually passed out from one of your visions!"

"Actually, I didn't." Sam's voice was quiet.

Dean spun around to look at him. His voice was incredulous. "What do you mean, you didn't? Are you having a problem with short term memory or something? I was right there when it happened, remember?"

"I'm not saying I didn't pass out. I'm just saying…" Sam trailed off.

"What?" Dean demanded.

Sam was frustrated. "Dean, didn't you pay attention to the little girl I told you about? Why do you think she told me about her miraculous recovery?"

Dean shrugged. "I don't know. I didn't really think much of it." He resumed pacing. "Anyway, I really think we should be concentrating on finding this Josie person. Maybe she can…"

"I'm dying."

"…help us with finding out….what?" Dean went cold. "What did you say?"

"You heard me." Sam's voice was tired. He got up and went into the bathroom to splash some cold water on his face.

Dean followed him in. "I don't think that's funny, Sam!"

"Trust me, I don't either."

"Well, then, why did you say it?" Dean wanted to know. He grabbed Sam's arm to make him look at him.

"What, are you being oblivious on purpose? I'm dying, okay! It's not a joke! I have a brain tumor, and based on where it is and the size, they can't operate!" Sam yanked his arm away and brushed past Dean, trying to keep his composure.

Dean stood stock still, his mind racing. No. It's not possible. It's just not possible. Fate wouldn't be that cruel. There is no way my baby brother is being taken away from me. I don't know what Sam is doing, why he's saying this, but it's not true. Something else has got to be going on. Having convinced himself, he went into the next room, ready to find out the real truth, not this awful lie. He found Sam, who had sat back down on a bed with his head down. He looked up when he heard Dean come in, and tears were silently streaming down his cheeks.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you before." For a moment Dean didn't understand why Sam was so upset. There was nothing really wrong, after all. Except it hit Dean then, that Sam wasn't making this up, that this wasn't some cruel joke. His whole world stopped. He took a step forward, his knees threatening to buckle.

"No. Oh my God, no Sammy!" Dean's voice was anguished. His whole body was shaking and his fists were clenched without him being aware of it. Almost as if he was getting ready to fight off some possible attacker, except that there was nothing there for him to fight. He couldn't destroy the thing that was slowly killing his beloved brother. His brother. The one person he had sworn to protect at all costs, the one person he would willingly lay his life down for. The one person he loved unconditionally. I can't lose you. I won't! There would be nothing left for me. He didn't feel the tears sliding down his cheeks as he walked over to the other bed, sitting down facing Sam.

"Sammy?" His voice was pleading, almost as if he was begging Sam one last time to tell him that it wasn't true. He would forgive Sam anything, just as long as it meant Sam wasn't dying. But when Sam just looked at him, his last glimmer of hope faded and he bent his head, his despair and guilt overwhelming him, warring with each other. I can't handle this. I can handle any demon, any other crisis, but not this. Not Sammy. Oh God, this is my fault. I should have realized sooner. The signs were there. I shouldn't have been pushing him so hard on jobs. It's my job to protect him, and I failed. Why can't it be me? I would trade my life for his in a heartbeat.

"Dean." Sam's voice was sharp. "Dean, stop it!" Dean just looked at him, his eyes glassy, not understanding. "Listen to me," Sam continued in a softer voice. "You've got to stop that. Don't you realize that I can practically read your mind right now? This is not your fault." Dean started to say something, but Sam wouldn't hear of it. "I shouldn't even have to say that, but I know how your mind works. You probably also think somehow you've failed me. Well, you didn't. You couldn't. This is nothing you can control, okay? It's just one of those things."

"Just one of those things?" Dean repeated, his breath hitching uncontrollably. "My baby brother is dying, and you're telling me it's just one of those things!"

Sam looked down. As much as he wanted to stand tough for Dean, a single tear escaped. "I know," he acknowledged. "I shouldn't have said that, it's just that I've had more time to process this. There's nothing medically that can be done for me now. They gave me medication to help with the pain, although it seems to be losing its effects. There's really nothing they can do for my occasional blurring vision or nausea." Dean felt sick as he listened to his brother calmly describe the symptoms he had been experiencing while Dean had been oblivious.

Sam blew out a shaky breath and tried to smile at Dean. "Bet my behavior makes a lot more sense now, huh?"

Dean nodded weakly. Did it ever. "So, when you would take off for an hour or more with some lame excuse, you were…"

"Those were just my bad episodes," Sam hastened to explain. "Most of the time I can deal with the pain, but occasionally I can start to feel that it's going to be a lot worse than normal. Yesterday was actually the first time I've really passed out. It just came on too fast. I don't know. I guess I just didn't want you to see me like that."

"And you freaked out when I went near your bag because…"

"My pills are in there, yeah, " Sam admitted. "I knew if you saw them, we'd be having this conversation a lot earlier."

"Well, why weren't we having this conversation earlier?" Dean wanted to know. "Don't you think this is something you should have shared? God, I could have taken you to other doctors, or found some other treatment, or…" His voice was breaking. He could have gone on forever but Sam stopped him.

"No, Dean. There is nothing else. I've already talked to all the doctors, all the specialists, whenever you weren't around." Dean thought back guiltily to all the times Sam had talked him into a "mini" vacation, just one day or so away from each other. So they didn't grate on each other's nerves, Sam had said. It had made sense at the time. Now it made even more sense.

He shook himself from his reverie and focused on what Sam was saying. "No more, okay? I don't have that much time left, and I don't want to spend it with doctors." Hearing that put another arrow directly into Dean's heart. How much time did he have left with his brother? "As to why I didn't tell you." Sam sighed. He looked directly at Dean. "I didn't want to be a distraction. I knew when I told you, you would be worrying about me from then on, wondering if I was okay to do a job. Worrying about me during a job, which could be deadly to you. I couldn't let that happen." Dean was in shock. Sam had a death sentence handed down to him, yet he was still worried about protecting Dean?

"Sam, that's my job," Dean protested. "It's my responsibility to care for you, protect you. I can't do that if I don't know all the facts." His mind was still spinning, trying to process everything Sam had told him. It's amazing how the mind still works when the heart is shattered into a million pieces, he thought. All of a sudden, he remembered something Sam had said, and latched onto it like a life preserver to a drowning man.

"Wait a minute! That girl! You think that man cured her, don't you?"

"I think it's possible," Sam admitted. "That's why I need to go there today and find him."

Dean jumped up, suddenly full of energy and hope. "Well, come on then, let's go!"

"Wrong."

Dean turned around to face Sam, who had stood up. He was confused. "What do you mean, wrong? I thought you wanted to go find this guy?"

"Exactly," Sam said. "I'm going, you're not."

"Forget it!" Dean exclaimed. "You're crazy if you think you're going anywhere without me."

Sam couldn't believe Dean was arguing with him. "Dean, did you even listen to any part of my vision? Whoever this guy is, for whatever reason, he wants to kill you. Josie thinks he is going to kill you. If you think I'm going to let that happen, you're the crazy one. I'm not going to lose you."

Dean just shook his head. What about me Sammy? Do you think I can lose you? If you die, I know I'm not going to be far behind you. "Yeah, I did listen to your vision. And I also heard you say that if this guy gets the chance, he will hurt you as well. Which I'm not going to let happen. So either we're both going, or neither of us are going." That was the one thing Dean was firm on. Whatever they did from now on, they were doing together.

Sam looked at his brother, and saw the stubborn set to his jaw. He's really not going to let this go. Sam threw up his hands in exasperation and gave up. "Fine! We both go. But be careful, you hear me? I'll never forgive you if you get yourself killed."

"Like you're one to talk!" Dean exclaimed. He was at once horrified by his comment, but then he locked gazes with Sam. And despite the seriousness of the situation, they both burst out laughing.

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TBC

A/N: They just needed to let go of some stress, or they were going to self destruct. Okay, now before anyone kills me, I know I promised that Dean was going to do something in this chapter which was going to affect things. But this chapter just got away from me and is already twice as long as either of my other chapters. It's past 8am on Sunday morning and I haven't been to sleep yet, trying to get this done. So I decided that I would rather get a chapter out to you guys this weekend like I promised, but without the Dean moment in it. Instead I will include that in the next chapter. Promise! And I hope you guys are still ok with angst, because we are not done. We still haven't met our villain, and where do Josie and Tasha fit into this? More to come! Please review! Thanks!