A/N: Lil angsty
"Come get your children before I have you arrested." Was all the text from his pregnant wife at 8pm on a Friday while he was stuck at work said.
Fuck, he muttered to himself.
She declined his call on the first ring and he sighed, looking up at Bell. "Lieu, I need to get home and check on Liv and the kids. I'll come back after I get everyone settled."
Though he'd declined the UC position for safety reasons, the work had still be non stop for both squads, on top of everything else SVU handled.
They'd tried to come up with a system that split their time working on the case, but life wasn't perfect and that week, they both spent more times with their squads and each other at the office than at home with their kids.
It was around 1pm that afternoon that Fin and Bell finally put their foot down, sending a 23 week pregnant Olivia home to be with the kids for the night.
To be fair, Elliot had tried to do the same thing a few hours earlier, but as she sharply reminded him behind the closed door of her office, "I outrank you and I will not take orders from a Sergeant."
Call it pride or spending six whole days with her husband while trying to maintain control of their side of the case, or her pregnancy hormones, the remark ended in him storming out and her in frustrated tears.
"Cap... go home. Please? Pick up the kids. Have a movie night- some alone time without the worlds most overprotective father up your ass, and we'll send him home early in the morning." Fin had practically begged and Bell nodded in agreement. "Take the night... you can come back tomorrow. We've got it I promise."
She ended up relenting and made her way home after an apology hug and and some rare PDA to Elliot in front of their squads.
So when Elliot showed his CO her text, they both knew something was up and she sent him home to sort whatever crisis was happening between the Stabler kids.
Walking through his door, he found the house silent. He took a deep breath and walked to the end of the hall, opening their door.
Liv was sat in the middle of their bed, meditating and holding her belly.
"Hi…" he said softly and she shook her head, her eyes remaining shut.
"They're in their rooms. I took all electronics. Talk to Eli first." She said bluntly.
"Can you give me a heads up," he asked, feeling frustrated, and her eyes shot open.
"No. You can go talk to your children because I need to fucking relax or I'm going to have this baby at 23 weeks, Elliot," she snapped and he shook his head, shutting their door a little too forcefully.
Tears sprung to her eyes and she took several huge breaths.
Walking into Eli's room, he found him and Noah sitting and chatting softly.
El sighed looking at his boys and knowing Emma not being in there was a bad sign.
"Okay." He sighed, sitting in Eli's desk chair and looking at them. "What happened."
Noah got up to leave and El shot him a look. "Sit."
"It's my fault…" Eli started and Noah shook his head.
"No it's mine I should have given you space."
"But I should have been more calm."
"Yeah but I knew you needed a minute and I pushed and made you say that."
"No I said that cause I was angry and I just wanted to be alone I didn't mean it."
"No you said it cause Kathy's anniversary is coming up and you're sad but you never talk about it. Anyways I shouldn't have hit you."
"I mean I deserved it, I would have hit Dickie."
"Woah woah woah woah," Elliot said, cutting the boy's banter off, "what the hell happened."
They looked at him and took a deep breath, beginning the story.
Liv arrived at the school to pick up their kids at the normal 3:30 bell.
None of the them had any activities, so she was looking forward to spending some quality mom time with them that evening.
Those plans, however, went down the drain when Eli got into the car. He was in a piss poor mood and Liv frowned.
"Baby, what's wrong…" she asked gently and he shook his head. "Nothing."
Eli was rarely anything but loving and kind to everyone, so his demeanor immediately worried her.
He was so much like his father in so many ways, and she knew to give him space and that, eventually, he'd come to her to chat.
"Well…" she smiled, changing the subject, "I thought we could watch a movie or play a game tonight?"
Eli shook his head. "I want to get out and go to the gym."
She let out a breath and looked at the littles in the back. "Ok…. Well that's fine baby. Guys?" She asked and they nodded.
"I miss really miss daddy though and I kinda wanted to hang out with you Eli…" Noah frowned from the back seat. He always struggled when El got hung up at work and didn't have much time to be active at home. It was behavior that was concerning Liv and El to the max, on top of everything else that week, but they decided to deal with it when the case ended.
"Noah not today," Eli grumbled, his jaw tight and his eyes narrow.
The small boy frowned and sank back into his seat.
When they got home, Eli stormed to his room and Noah sighed, following him. He was about to knock when the door swung up.
"Dude did you take my boxing gloves again??" He yelled at him.
Noah was startled and jumped back. "N-no I think they're in mom's car…" he said, tears forming in his eyes.
Liv and Em came around the corner, shocked at the outburst. "Eli!" Liv admonished.
Ignoring her, he shook his head at his brother. "Stop crying and being such a baby Jesus," he said, his voice still raised.
Emma stepped up between them. "Hey don't talk to him like that!!!! You're being really mean!" She yelled back at him, her genetic Stabler temper showing.
"Eli that's enough-" Liv began before he cut her off.
"Oh whatever- I'm not listening right now to either of you. Why should I huh? Both of you are the reason my mom was miserable before she died and now I'm stuck being the babysitter and having too much responsibility while you and dad do whatever the hell you do at work," he said back before stopping dead in his tracks and realizing what just came out of his mouth.
Emma's lip was quivering and now, the learned Stabler temper was coming out in Noah.
He started wailing on his brother, his short stature only allowing him to reach his sides and chest, but still hitting pretty hard.
Their sister was full on sobbing now and started to run to her room as Eli yelled out apologies while Noah still hit him.
Liv was in utter shock at the scene before her, and when she finally came to, she lost it.
"ENOUGH," she yelled, turning off mom and turning on Captain Benson.
"Rooms. Everyone. Now. Leave your phone and whatever else you have outside your doors. Now."
They were all in shock and went silent. She never yelled. Ever.
They did as they were told and sat on their bed, heads hanging in shame and sadness. All three were crying now, and Liv called Elliot, only to have him not answer.
Taking a deep breath, she went into Eli's room first. "Do not leave this room. I don't care if you have to pee or are thirsty. I don't care if you're on fire. Do not leave this room. Am I understood, Elliot?"
El cut them off. "Shit she called you Elliot?" He asked and both boys nodded.
"I was scared for my life…" Eli mumbled before continuing.
"Y-yes ma'am," he said keeping his eyes on the floor.
"Look at me when I speak to you." She commanded and he slowly looked up and repeated himself. "Yes m-ma'am…"
She walked away towards Noah's room. "You wouldn't be in trouble, except you just beat the crap out of your brother. Are you serious Noh? That's not how I raised you, nor is it any example daddy has set for you in the last 2 years. Do not leave this room until I tell you. Understand?"
He nodded quickly and nervously. "Y-yes ma'am."
Finally ending up at Emma's room, she sighed and sat next to her, making the switch from Captain to Momma.
"Baby he didn't mean it.." she whispered and Emma nodded, sobbing. "Y-yes he does h-he hates me…"
Liv sighed. "No… he doesn't. Not at all. He had a really bad moment. And sometimes in bad moments we say the thing that we know will hurt the people we love the most. He loves you… you're his best friend… he's just struggling right now and needs to talk to me and dad…"
She cried harder, leaning into her mom. "I w-wanna call d-daddy… I want him home…"
Frowning, Liv tried to not take it personally, and picked up her phone, trying Elliot again.
No answer.
She was gonna kill him.
"Baby he's got the case…. Can you take some time and relax while I handle the boys?" She asked gently and Emma nodded, hugging her tightly not wanting to let go.
"How about we call Liz? Would that be good?" She suggested and Em nodded trying to control her breathing.
Thankfully, Liz answered right away. "Hi… I have to go beat your brothers. Can you talk to your sister and calm her down please?" She practically begged and Liz nodded immediately.
"Of course Liv…"
Handing the phone to Emma, she left and closed her door, sucking in a huge breath before going back to Noah's room.
He was sat with his head in his knees, silently waiting for his mom to come and yell.
"Noah Stabler… why… why would you hit your brother," she asked, exhausted with a hand on her belly and the other on her back.
"I… I was trying to p-protect Emma and um… I just got mad mommy I'm sorry," he finished, starting to cry.
She sighed. "Son Im proud of you that you wanted to protect your sister but it wasn't appropriate. Violence like that never is. You need to learn your words baby… I'm very disappointed in you and want you to think about your actions until dad gets home okay?"
He nodded quickly. "I-I'm so sorry momma…"
"I forgive you but this conversation isn't over. I love you- please stay in this room."
He nodded quickly and she sighed, moving to her oldest's room. She took a deep breath before opening his door. He was sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands.
"Look at me," she said, her tone more gentle but still commanding.
He slowly looked up, his eyes red from crying, and went to speak but she stopped him. "I don't care what you say about me. Or think or feel about me. I don't. Cause as far as I'm concerned, you're my son. But you will not speak to your baby sister like that ever again am I understood?" She said, her voice raising and he nodded quickly.
"Never again. She has nothing to do with me or your father's choices or actions."
Nodding quickly again, he opened his mouth to speak, only to be met with her hand again.
"More so, I know this week has sucked. And I know you've taken on a lot of responsibility with Emma and Noah, which we appreciate, but your father and I have offered one of the big kids or Lucy countless times and you've said no." She was practically yelling at this point and just couldn't stop herself.
"I know... you thought you'd be slick and sneak Sammi in to do God knows what, but you forget your parents are POLICE OFFICERS and you're a 16 year old kid who isn't as smooth as he thinks."
His lip quivered and he was slightly shaking, cursing himself for letting his girlfriend in the damn house when he knew Noah couldn't keep a secret to save his life. Standing with his hands up, he tried to take the 'calm down you're pregnant' angle only to have her raised voice turn into her somehow scarier, low 'ruining a suspect' voice.
"No. No. Don't try and Stabler Sr. me. Eli I'm really, really disappointed in yourright now. I can't talk to you at this moment. It's going to have to wait until dad gets home. Think about what you've done and don't leave this room."
"Y-yes ma'am," he barely whispered.
She walked out and back down the hall, checking on Emma and taking her phone back.
"Do you need me Liv?" Lizzie asked and she shook her head. "I think I'm just gonna wait for dad to get home… thank you for talking to Emma," she nodded and they said goodbye.
El sat back looking at his boys with a sigh.
"She ordered pizza and left it outside our rooms while she and Emmy ate," Eli said softly with a sigh.
"Emmy won't talk to Eli I don't get it he and I fight all the time and we're cool and mom is really mad at both of us," Noah sighed and laid back on the bed.
"Noh…" El couldn't help but smile, "Noh girls are different… they need time buddy," he said before turning his attention to Eli.
"I don't care if you guys fight or smack each other… you're brothers it happens. But what you said to your sister is so wrong… and I don't blame her for being upset man."
He frowned and nodded, keeping his eyes to the ground. "I'm sorry dad," he whispered.
"I'm not the one you need to apologize to. I'm not even bringing up the sneaking Sammi in or the responsibility thing right now. Right now, I want you to go talk to her please and fix that and then we'll handle mom ok? Do you want me to come?"
Shaking his head and standing up he sighed, looking at his little brother. "We're cool right?"
Noah nodded quickly "sorry I accidentally snitched about Sammi," he whispered and Eli smiled for the first time in a few hours.
"Don't... I shouldn't have done it," he said and Noah hugged him before watching him leave.
Eli took a deep breath and knocked on his sisters door. "Emmy… it's me can I come in?"
"No!" Came a muffled call.
He frowned and opened the door anyways. "I said no Eli get out!"
"Emmy please let me just talk to you…" he pleaded and she shook her head, throwing a pillow at him. "I hate you!!"
Tears were streaming down her face and he sighed, sitting next to her and pulling her into him. She sunk into him and sobbed, holding onto him tightly.
"Emma Bee I'm so so sorry… that was horrible and I'm so so sorry. I've been struggling and hurting and… I just wanted someone else to feel that. I'm so sorry."
"I-I th-thought Kathy didn't k-know…" she was so upset she could barely speak.
Eli sucked in a huge breath. "She did. And never told daddy. A-and… they were miserable anyways… long before you came along."
She started crying harder, her sweet and empathetic heart breaking completely.
"Emmy…." He whispered, tearing up himself, "I'm sorry…."
"Please leave," she huffed, sitting back and he frowned shaking his head. "Em you're my best friend please… I'm so sorry…"
"Get out Eli!" She yelled at him through tears and his breath caught in his throat.
"Em…" he whispered and she whipped to look at him. He saw their mom's fire in her eyes and he held his hands up in mock surrender as El came in.
"Eli go to your room… You guys will talk tomorrow." He said calmly, sitting next to his daughter who sunk into him.
"Calm down baby… I'm here. Daddy's here," he whispered and after almost 30 minutes, she was calm enough to speak.
"Y-you said you didn't know about me but Kathy did?" She asked, looking up at him, heart broken.
He nodded. "Kathy saw mommy with you guys one day when she was back in the city visiting Dick. She never told me. Baby I swear- I would have been home in a second."
Her lip started quivering again. "Wh-why did she hate me s-so much…"
Sighing, he gave her a squeeze. "It wasn't you baby. It was me and mom."
"Cause you cheated?" She asked, looking up at her.
Frowning and then nodding, he sighed. "Yes. It was wrong. We shouldn't have done it. Mommy and I dated when me and Kathy were separated. We stopped when we got back together and… And then one night we had a hard case and… we went to each other instead of anyone else. And we made you."
It was the safest explanation he could give to his weeping but insanely mature 11 year old.
"Do you regret it? Cause Kathy was so mad for so long?" She asked, just above a whisper and bracing herself for his answer. He gave a sad smile.
"Emma Bernadette are you asking if I regret you?"
The tears that had been in her eyelids spilled over and she nodded, starting to gasp through her sobs.
He shook his head. "Never. I wish I did it differently. That I didn't get back with Kathy or hurt her. Or hurt mommy. But… if I had to do it all over again the exact same way in order to get you? I wouldn't even think twice."
Her arms wrapped around his middle and she cried harder. "I love you daddy…"
"I love you baby girl… always, always, always."
They laid quietly for a while longer before he spoke again. "Your brother loves you. You literally are his best friend. And I know he's yours… maybe more than Noah in some ways. You trust him. He's your protector. You confide in each other when you don't wanna worry your baby brother," he said, playing with her hair gently.
"What he said was so wrong. He has a lot of my bad qualities. He's hurting and needs to talk about it but he won't… so instead he lashes out. But that's all it was. He lashed out… and Mom and I will talk with him in the morning. But please don't go to sleep thinking he loves you any less."
She nodded and took a deep breath, closing her eyes.
"Do you have to go back to work," she asked softly and he nodded. "I do… but I'll be back by the time you wake up to make breakfast okay?"
"Okay daddy…" she said through a yawn.
"Sleep baby. I love you- goodnight," he said, gently removing himself from her grasp and covering her up.
"Night daddy… I love you." She called softly as he walked out of her room.
Shutting her door, he put his hands to his face and sighed, returning to the Eli's room where he knew they both would be.
"Is she ok?" Eli asked nervously and El nodded, smiling at the sleeping Noah.
"I have to go back to work tonight. I'll be back by 7, and you and I are getting up to get flowers for your mom and sister. And then we are making breakfast for them and we are going to talk this through. Okay?"
He nodded quickly. "Mom hates me…" he said softly, "probably doesn't wanna be my mom anymore."
El sat beside his son and sighed. "She's pregnant and hormonal and hurt by what you said and stressed about work and annoyed at me. But she doesn't hate you and she'll never not want you to be her son. Get some sleep okay?"
Hugging his dad, he sighed and nodded. "I love you man," El said.
"Love you dad…"
When El came back into their room, she was laying on her side with her back to the door.
He frowned and slowly crawled on the bed, wrapping his arms around her tightly, a wave of relief washing over him when she snuggled backwards.
"He didn't mean it," he whispered and she nodded. "I know… my hormones were just… and Noah hitting and Emma sobbing. And today... this whole week. It was just a lot. I needed you…"
"I know baby… I'm so sorry…" He trailed off when she turned in his arms.
"No… it's okay… I understand work you know, I've been in the thick of it too I just.. it was a lot and my hormones… have been a lot and I just needed your help," she paused, "I needed my husband..."
"I'll work harder… to answer my phone and stuff more during long cases," he whispered, letting a hand fall to her belly.
She nodded slowly. "Thank you… You need to go back to work don't you?"
"Yeah… but my shift ends at 6:30. I'll be home and then it's breakfast in bed for my girls and we'll talk with Eli," he said and she nodded.
"He knows I love him right…" she asked, looking up at him.
He took a huge breath and nodded slowly. "I think you should at least remind him tonight…"
Tears sprang to her eyes and she nodded. "I'll walk you out… text me when you get to work please?"
Wrapping his arms around her as they walked, he nodded. "I will. I love you baby."
"I love you, El… Tell Ayanna I said thank you," she smiled small.
"Will do babe."
She shut the door and locked up, before turning to Eli's room and opening the door. Smiling small when she saw Noh in bed with him, she walked slowly to them and sat on the edge.
She knew her oldest was still awake by his breathing, and gently put a hand on his arm. "You are my son and I love you so much. And nothing will ever change that, baby. Get some sleep and we'll talk in the morning."
Squeezing his eyes shut, he nodded, his voice thick with emotion as she got up to leave the room. "I love you momma…"
Smiling small, she shut the door and shuffled to her girl's bedroom and climbed in with her, snuggling up and falling asleep.