A/N: Sorry I have 900 stories going.
This one is still my #1
Please review!
Noah was awake and sat on the counter when Liv got home.
After laughing at her husbands obvious disappointment, she walked over and kissed both of their cheeks.
"Mom I feel bad."
"Why?" She asked, rubbing his arm.
"I feel bad about what I said to Mike, that wasn't right," he shook his head.
Liv sucked in a deep breath and nodded slowly. "Well… it was a little harsh, but sometimes we have to be a little harsh at first to get someone attention. But it doesn't mean you can't apologize, buddy... and maybe who knows, you guys could become friends," she said gently and he frowned, leaning into her chest.
"It probably made him super upset," he whispered.
"Noah…" she said softly, "oh you have the biggest heart, my sweet boy…" she whispered into his hair as she gently rocked with him. "You make me so proud… follow your heart and what you think is right… okay?"
He nodded and wiped his eyes, clearly still exhausted from the day's tryouts. "How about you go back and nap a little more?"
"Okay," he whispered, hugging her tightly.
El gave her a sad look and she smiled small. "You want some momma cuddles?" She asked and he nodded. "In your bed? Dad too?" He asked, hopefully, looking up at her and then back to Elliot.
"Sure baby boy… come on," he smiled, lifting him and bring him to their room.
They crawled into bed and he snuggled up in between them, facing his mom.
Since Elliot came into their lives, he'd been a total daddy's boy and moments like this had become more and more rare.
El reached across the pillow to play with Liv's hair as he watched them interact and his little boy relax in the safety of his mom's arms.
Noah was asleep within minutes and Liv pressed several soft kisses to his cheek.
"That first night I had he and Em home," she whispered, smiling fondly, "was just unbelievable."
"Tell me," El smiled small and she kissed him, remembering back.
"Hi…" Liv cooed, walking in with the baby boy in her arms.
A three year old Emma who was cuddled up with her Uncle Nick and watching a movie, gasped when she saw her mama.
"Hi mama," she smiled.
"Emma… this is…"
"Noah!!!!" Emma cut her off with a delighted squeal, earning a smile from the little boy.
Liv let out a laugh of relief and set her stuff down, moving to kiss her head before sitting next to her with Noah in her lap.
"My bruffer," Emma said, her blonde curls bouncing with the excited dance and clapping she did.
Leaning in, she gave the baby a gentle hug, and he automatically snuggled into her. "Hi buddy," she said cutely and Liv laughed softly. "Where'd you learn that huh?"
"Guilty," Fin, who'd just come in smiled.
"Well he's gonna stay with us for a bit honey… and hopefully," she smiled small, kissing her cheek, "hopefully he can stay for good and become your real brother."
"Peaaaase mama," she begged, "I wuv him soooo mutch aweady!!"
"Me too, baby girl... me too."
Nick and Fin had insisted they stay, but Liv insisted back that she was more than capable, and eventually won out.
After making a hearty dinner of Emma's favorite: Mac & Cheese with a side of raspberries, the trio sat and ate, before getting into baths and pajamas.
They curled up in her bed for story time, and she took a few selfies to commemorate the moment once they'd both fallen asleep against her.
Getting up slowly, she settled Noah in his crib that was by her bed, and turned back to the little girl sleeping in the center of it.
She was her daddy in every way.
She'd watched them both sleep like that at least a thousand times.
On their bellies. One arm hugging a blanket or a stuffed animal or her. The other under their head.
Even the little pout they had when they slept was identical.
Her heart ached, thinking about his strong arms wrapping around her from behind and watching their little ones sleep.
Because from the moment she held Noah today, she knew... he was just as much Elliot's as she was her own.
Shaking her head free of the thoughts, she climbed into bed, kissed her girl's cheek, and fell asleep to the same prayer she said every night:
Please bring him home to us one day.
Ted's soft cry woke them from their day dream, and he smiled, leaning across to kiss her.
"Love you."
"Love you."
Maintaining eye contact a moment, they both released a contented sigh.
Her memories of the times without him were no longer sources of pain for either of, but rather had grown into shared memories of sorts.
Like he was there, and hadn't missed a moment of time with her or their son or daughter.
The crying stopped and they peaked at the video monitor, smiling as they watched their little one put himself back to sleep.
"I'm gonna check on him if you'll put Noh on the couch?" She whispered.
"He's gonna wake up," he said softly and she nodded, knowing he was right.
"Shower?" She asked and he chuckled.
"Honey I don't want your first time since baby to be against a shower wall."
"I don't care where it is, long as it happens in the next 10 minutes," she winked and he stifled a small moan, nodding as he watched her exit their room to check their baby.
Once she was satisfied that he was sound asleep and okay, she made her way back to their room to find him already shirtless in the bathroom.
"You're sure?" He asked softly as she shut the door and locked it.
"Yes," she whispered, pressing her hands flat against his chest and kissing him.
"I'll be gentle," he promised, his hands moving to hold her face, and she smiled small. "I'll tell you what I need," she nodded and he smiled.
"You always do," he said, backing her against the counter so she could lean against it.
She let out a soft moan as his hands trailed down her body and under her arms, holding her steady and grazing her sensitive breasts with the rough pads on his thumbs.
"El," she whimpered, and he smiled. "I missed you saying my name like that," he murmured, kissing her slowly as he roamed further and further down her body, across her soft belly and to the button of her shorts.
"My stomachs not what it used to be," she whispered and he shook his head. "It's better… cause it grew two of our babies," he said as he sunk to his knees and kissed the not as tight skin softly while he worked to pull her shorts and underwear down.
Dropping to his knees fully, he pressed soft kisses to the longer hair that adores her mound, and she chuckled, feeling insecure.
"I haven't had time to shave," she whispered.
"Olivia Stabler," he said, pressing his cheek flush to her V, and running his hands up the back of her legs to hold her plump ass that he swore had grown since the baby.
"You are the sexiest, most perfect woman alive. I don't care what you look like or how much your body changes. I'll always be attracted to you," he whispered, rolling his face so that his nose nudged her clit.
"El," she gasped.
"Tell me if anything becomes too much okay?" He said, gently leaning her back against the counter for better access.
"Mhm," she gasped as his lips wrapped tightly around her most sensitive area that was still heightened by her raging hormones.
"El… oh El," she mumbled, rolling her head back as he sucked and nibbled her sensitive bud, using his hands to widen her stance ever so slightly.
"One at a time," he whispered, moving to push one finger deep inside of her, but stopping when she felt her hands move to the back of his head and neck.
She shook her head. "No I… I want all of you…"
"Honey it's been a while," he whispered, swiping her slit and feeling how wet she already was.
"I know… but I need you… please," she whined as he stood and pressed their lips together.
"Shower?" He asked with a soft moan and she shook her head. "Here. Now."
"I can do that," he purred into her mouth as her hands went to his hips to push his shorts down.
"Just go slow," she asked and he kissed her again. "Whatever you need my love," he said, hiking her leg around his waist and swiping himself along her clit and slit.
"El," she moaned when he found her slick entrance and pushed his swollen and 6-week neglected head in.
"This okay?" He muttered and she nodded, arms wrapping to his neck.
"So big," she whispered through a soft moan as he pushed in further and she shivered. "Not as big as our giant children's heads," he teased into her ear and she giggled, trailing off into a low moan as he bottomed out in her.
"Elliot oh my… oh my god I missed you," she mumbled as he began to pump slowly within her.
"I missed you too honey," he whispered into her mouth as he moved his hips at a slow and steady pace.
"El.. baby…" she moaned.
"I gotcha," he said lowly, turning the faucet on behind them in an effort to muffle her.
She couldn't control the sounds coming from her mouth as her husband tried desperately to control his thrusts and go easy on her.
Neither were going to last long, and she whined when she began fluttering around him. "Faster," she whispered, and he nodded, increasing his speed in as controlled of a manner as he could.
Her hands slipped to his cheeks and she exhaled sharply several times, lifting his head to make eye contact with her.
"Faster, Elliot. Harder. I can take it," she said huskily, and his eyebrows furrowed as he sped up and intense pleasure completely overtook his movements and senses.
"Baby," he growled, as she clenched around him harder. "You feel so good," he moaned.
"Yes! Yes babe!" She gasped, pressing their lips together.
"Not gonna last longer," he mumbled before sucking her lower lip between his teeth.
"Mhm! Mhm yes El!" She whined as both approached their explosions. "Yes El… yes El please… yes baby."
She was moaning and groaning, breathlessly as a thin sheen of sweat coated her brow and her body shook while her orgasm overtook her.
"Liv," he grunted, spilling into her, making the duration of her first post baby orgasm even longer.
"Yes…" she whined, "yes…" she said breathlessly as she came down from her high.
"Fuck Olivia… I love you," he whispered.
"I love you, baby," she mumbled onto his neck.
"We're gonna need to do this again," she whispered.
"Mhm, yes please," he smiled into her mouth.
"Like tonight," she clarified and he laughed softly.
"I knew what you meant."
They'd just settled back into bed with Noah when her phone buzzed with a text from Eli.
E: Can you guys come in my room? Coach just called.
"Fuck," they muttered together, fearing the worst.
Making their way into his room, they found him completely fine and lounging in his bed.
"Why do you guys look like someone just died??" He asked and they breathed out a chuckle.
"Your text was cryptic," Liv laughed, sliding beside him.
"Oh sorry no it's good news, I just didn't wanna wake up Noah."
El chuckled and shut the door, laying across the end of the bed.
"So we all made our teams obviously, and we all made as team captains."
"Hell yeah," El grinned and Liv pulled him in for a hug. "Congratulations baby boy!"
He smiled huge. "Thanks momma. But anyways, Noah is like really, really good obviously. And so coach wanted to know if we could have him on our team as an alternate? He probably wouldn't really play, mostly just practice with us and ball boy, but I think it would be really beneficial for him. What do you guys think?"
Both Liv and El were shocked. "You sure you want your baby brother hanging with you that much?" She asked hesitantly.
"Yeah he's my best friend," Eli laughed, "of course."
Liv smiled and bit her lip, looking to El. "He's still only 10 bud, so I mean do you think they'll be inappropriate around him?"
He shook his head. "We already have a group chat going to talk about it. They all love Noah and always look out for him so I think we're good."
Looking towards El again, they had a brief unspoken conversation and nodded. "Okay… we're okay with it if he is," El smiled.
"He's gonna flip," Eli grinned as Teddy squeaked on the monitor.
"Yes he is… I got him," Liv chuckled, leaving their boys to talk sports while she handled the littlest one.
"Hi… hi honey did you have a good nap?" She cooed, taking him from his swaddle and moving to the changing pad to change his onesie and diaper.
"I know, you're hungry huh?" She whispered, lifting him and getting him to latch once she was done with his change, near seconds before he started wailing.
He nursed hungrily, and she covered herself over as best as she could, settling back in Eli's room with them. Emma had joined them and groaned playfully when she saw her mom come in with Teddy already nursing.
"I wanted to feed him," she pouted.
"I'm sorry babe I didn't know you were awake," she whispered, kissing her cheek.
"It's okay," she said, moving the covering over to rub his tiny head as he nursed.
"Mom when do you go back to work?" Eli asked, setting his phone down after seeing Sammi still hadn't answered any of his texts from the day.
"Four weeks," she pouted. "I don't wanna leave him," she laughed softly.
"You'll be back in the groove before you know it mama," Emma smiled.
"Thank you, my love," she said, kissing her cheek several more times.
Noah made his entrance a few minutes later, plopping beside his older brother. "Soooo?!" He asked, knowing he knew the tryout results.
"Well we all made our teams as captains," he began as Emma cut him off with an eye roll. "Obviously," she said, playfully motioning towards their mom.
"Sweeeeet," Noah said, high-fiving his siblings and parents. "Now we're all captains… well… almost all," he teased, giving his dad a look.
"Ouch," he said feigning hurt. "But also, Teddy is on my no Captain team."
"Teddy is captain of the cutest baby ever team so," Emma said, giving him an Olivia look that made everyone laugh harder.
Eli shook his head smiling. "Anyways… Noah… coach Tim called me and… what do you think about being my team's alternate?"
Noah was jumping on the bed, his curls bouncing wildly before Eli even got the words out. "SERIOUSLY?!" He cried, startling Ted a bit.
He pointed at him and nodded. "Sorry bud," he said quickly before turning his attention back to his older brother. "Seriously? Seriously!"
"Seriously!" He laughed. "You'll practice with us and kinda ball boy, but technically you'll be the alternate."
"Dude!" Noah said bursting from the room to take a victory lap and Eli and Elliot followed to join in his excitement.
Emma rolled her head to her mom. "Men," she groaned, making Liv laugh.
"Men." She affirmed.
Noah was ecstatic, calling his best bud Isaiah, and then Jacob, and then Dickie to share the news.
"Dude!!!" Dickie cried over FaceTime. "You kidding me?!"
"I swear to God bro I'm so excited!" He cried, bouncing up and down.
"We're celebrating tomorrow okay? Emma? Call Liz to plan a party!" He said with a huge grin before they said their goodbyes.
"Already on it," she cried enthusiastically.
Noah had managed to convince his parents to order pizza and ice cream for dinner in celebration.
Liv was rocking Teddy as they ate and watched movies around 6pm when her phone rang.
"Fin?" She groaned to herself with a sigh, answering it.
"Benson."
"Liv… hey it's me… I'm so sorry I know we're supposed to be without you for a few more weeks but uh… I need you at this scene?"
"Fin," she sighed, "seriously?"
"Liv… you know I wouldn't call you if it wasn't urgent. You need to be here…"
She sat back and released a sharp breath before she nodded. "I… okay, can I get a heads up?" she asked.
Hearing her long time sergeant and friend hesitate sent a chill up her spine. "I'll send you the address," he said simply and she nodded. "Thanks Fin."
She looked at her husband and kids who all groaned. "What's so important?" El asked, a bit annoyed as she handed Teddy to him.
"I don't know honey…" she shot him a concerned look that he immediately picked up on. "But, it's Fin so I'm sure it's actually important," she pouted, making her way to get ready as the kids frowned dramatically.
When she came back out, she looked like herself again.
Slacks. Blazer. Boots. Hair and make up. Elliot was practically drooling and she gave him a playful look.
"Okay guys," she said nervously, looking mostly to El who was cradling Ted.
"I know baby… milk in the fridge. We're all good. We got him, okay," he smiled, standing with their wide awake newborn.
"Okay," she breathed out, as he approached her and kissed her gently.
"Bye baby boy… mama loves you. Be good for daddy okay?" She cooed, frowning and gently brushing back his thin and dark hair. "I love you…"
"No mom don't worry we'll be fine," Noah teased, tossing himself back on the couch dramatically.
"Yeah momma don't worry about us," Eli teased, too, doing the same.
"Ignore them," Emma laughed, getting up to hug her. "Good luck momma. We love you. You look gorgeous!" She exclaimed and Liv laughed.
"I love my little hype woman," she teased, kissing her head before doing the same to the boys. "Bye my loves."
"Bye momma have a blast."
"Kick some bad guy ass!"
"Language," El scolded as his youngest cracked up. "Way to go Eli!"
"Whoops," Eli smiled, covering his mouth as Emma cackled.
Liv pulled up to the scene and climbed out of her SUV, looking like the boss everyone knew she was.
"The Cap is back," Amanda smiled small, giving her a hug and holding it a bit longer than usual.
"Hi Manda," she smiled small, giving her a concerned look when she pulled back.
"Over here," she nodded, leading her past the blocked off section as everyone gave enthusiastic but sad hellos to her.
They made their way over to where Fin was and she knew, the minute she saw his face, that it wasn't good.
"Fin," she said warningly.
"Cap… I…" he trailed off as she squatted down and pulled the sheet back.
Fin watched and grimaced as her face went white while she studied the one under the sheet, before standing and moving her hand to her head.
Her mind was racing, reviewing a million scenarios when a soft and shaky voice from behind her pulled her from her thoughts.
"Livie…."