Disclaimer: I don't own The Little Mermaid, or Kingdom Hearts. Or...yes.
Kairi swam through the water, Flounder the wimp following closely behind.
Entering her secret...
"Grotto," muttered Kairi under her breath.
Entering her secret GROTTO, Kairi did a random backflip.
"Coolio random backflip, Kairi!" whistled Flounder.
"Shut up, fish," said Kairi. "You are in MY territory now, and if you touch anything, I will have you randomly BURNED."
Flounder sucked his whistle back up and decided to stay in one position.
Kairi swam around for what seemed like a pointlessly long time, touching odds and ends...okay, junk...but it was actually to build up suspense.
"Now I am going to sing a totally made-up, spur-of-the-moment, unplanned long song." Kairi took a deep breath...
Look at this stuff. Isn't it neat?
Wouldn't you think
my collection's complete?
Wouldn't you think I'm the girl
The girl who has ev'rything?
Look at this trove, treasures untold
How many wonders can one
cavern hold?
Looking around here you'd think
Sure, she's got ev'rything
I've got gadgets and gizmos a-plentyI've got who's-its and what's-its galore
You want thing-a-mabobs?
I've got twenty
But who cares?
No big deal
I want more
I wanna be where the people are
I wanna see, wanna see 'em dancin'
Walkin' around on those
Whaddya call 'em?
Oh, feet
Flippin' your fins, you don't get too far
Legs are required for jumpin', dancin'
Strollin' along down the
What's that word again? Street
Up where they walk, up where they runUp where they stay all day in the sun
Wanderin' free, wish I could be
Part of that world
What would I give if I could live
Outta these waters?
What would I pay to spend a day
Warm on the sand?
Betcha on land they understand
Bet they don't reprimand
their daughters
Bright young women
sick of swimmin'
Ready to stand
And ready to know what
the people know
Ask 'em my questions and
get some answers
What's a fire?--and why does it
What's the word? Burn
When's it my turn?Wouldn't I love, love to explore
That shore up above, out of the sea
Wish I could be part of that world
Kairi finished her incredibly long and supposedly not-rehearsed song. The Authoress cracked her knuckles and shoulders, tired from typing the stupid thing.
"They'd better not complain about this..." Rain muttered, and continued the story.
"Well, what did you..." Kairi was about to ask Flounder what he thought of the un-rehearsed song, when she noticed a funky noise. "What are you..."
Yes, Flounder was snoring.
Kairi angrily threw a fork at Flounder with previously-unknown good aim. It stuck right above him, causing a small rock-slide, which proceeded to bury him.
"Hah, serves him right," Kairi muttered, swimming away.
For all we know, Flounder was suffocating. Or, since fish can't suffocate, crushed.
Unbeknownst to Kairi, that idiot-crab Sebastian had been watching from the shadows. Apparently he does not know it is bad to eavesdrop...
"Oh no!" he gasped. "She wants to go to da surface! I've gotta get it out of her head!"
"You are not permitted to go there, and that's final!" shouted a very, very angry...big surprise...King Triton. Who, by the way, is old and decrepit enough to actually be Kairi's grandpa, and not her dad.
"But...rrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaah!" Kairi shrieked, clutching her hair. "You don't even liste-"
"Don't tell me I don't listen, I just listened to you saying I don't listen, didn't I?" screamed King Triton, clearly not listening.
"But you-" Kairi tried again.
"That's enough! I can't take any more listening! Get out of my sight!" King Triton stormed off like an angry 3-year-old. "And...you're still forbidden!"
Kairi growled.
"Kairi, you're scaring me," Flounder whined, hiding behind something.
"Your hiding won't save you from my wrath if you keep being a WIMP!" screeched Kairi, pointing a finger at Flounder.
At Flounder's scaredy squealing, Kairi whirled around and decided to swim back to her GROTTO.
"I wish somebody-" Kairi was about to wish something mean would happen to her supposed-father, but was interrupted by an incessant clearing-of-the-throat.
Kairi waited one minute...two...three minutes! But the throat-clearing did not stop. Hands on hips...tail...tail...hips...whatever...Kairi rolled her eyes. "Would you SAY it already?"
Sebastian swam...do crabs swim? Anyway, Sebastian swam out of his...bad...hiding spot, along with scaredy-wimp Flounder, who was still sniffling.
"Kairi, you have got to get de idea of going to da surface outta your head!" Sebastian said. By the way, head and said rhyme. Just saying.
Kairi resisted the urge to kill herself.
"Here, let me tell you why in this other long and totally un-prepared song. I didn't even hire a chorus." Sebastian tapped a random stick on a random rock. Random music started playing, to which he randomly drummed on some shells to.
And then he began...and I'm really sorry for this, you can skip it if you want...his long, random song.
The seaweed is always greener
In somebody else's lake
You dream about going up there
But that is a big mistake
Just look at the world around you
Right here on the ocean floor
Such wonderful things surround you
What more is you lookin' for?
(Completely random and not-hired chorus):
Under the sea, under the sea
Darlin' it's better down where
it's wetter.
Take it from me
Up on the shore they work all day
Out in the sun they slave away
While we devotin' full tim to
floatin' under the sea
Down here all the fish is happy
As off through the waves they roll
The fish on the land ain't happy
They sad 'cause they in the bowl
But fish in the bowl is lucky
They in for a worser fate
One day when the boss get hungry
Guess who gon'be on the plate
(Completely random and not-hired chorus):
Under the sea, under the sea
Nobody beat us, fry us
and eat us in fricassee
We what the land folks
loves to cook
Under the sea we off the wook
We got no troubles
life is the bubbles
Under the sea, under the seaSince life is sweet here
We got the beat here naturally
Even the sturgeon and the ray
They get the urge 'n' start to play
We got the spirit, you got to
hear it under the sea
The newt play the flute
The carp play the harp
The plaice play the bass
And they soundin' sharp
The bass play the brass
The chub play the tub
The fluke is the duke of soul
The ray he can play
The lings on the strings
The trout rockin' out
The blackfish, she sings
The smelt and the sprat
they know where it's at
And oh, that blowfish blow
(Completely random and not-hired chorus):
Under the sea, under the sea
When the sardine begin the beguine
It's music to me
What do they got, a lot of sand
We got a hot crustacean band
Each little clam here
Know how to jam here
under the sea
Each little slug here
Cuttin' a rug here under the sea
Each little snail here
Know how to wail here
That's why it's hotter under
the water
Ya, we in luck here, down in
the muck here under the sea
Finishing with a bang...finally...Sebastian looked around to see that Kairi had mysteriously vanished.
(Flashback)
Kairi had been sitting there, not listening to Sebastian's on-the-spot song, when she spied something through the skylight in the grotto.
She decided to blow off Sebastian's song and check it out.
Sebastian was so busy singing his ridiculously long song, that the idiot little crab didn't notice a thing.
(End Flashback)
"Where has she run off to now?" moaned Sebastian.
Sorry for the ridiculously long songs. Please don't complain about them in the reviews. They're part of the story, and you can skip them if you want. But they have to be in there! It adds to the mood. XD